Okay guys;
As of tomorrow, I will be restarting CD, hopefully for the last time. I did decide to go another way a couple of months ago, but that did not really work - many reasons, far too many and personal to go into here. Anyway, everything is sorted out (I hope), and I am ready to go for it again. I am back in a job, and after 5 weeks am now well enough established that I can "calm down" and focus some of my attention back onto myself and what I need. I have also (almost) recovered from a bad pectoral muscle pull, which I can assure anyone who has not had to experience such a thing, is very painful indeed For 3 weeks now I have had stabbing pains across my chest, back, down my spine, and in my neck. The problem with such things is that you always tend to favour the painful area, sit in strange ways, and as a result the problem gets worse and spreads ..... Naturally, the fact that I could hardly move without winceing put me out of action exercise wise 100%, just as I was getting into a routine as well. My trainer was all for lightening the exercise regime and "working through it" ..... I told him what he could do with that idea . Looking back, it may have been better to follow his advice, but hindsight is a wonderful thing.
Any way, a combination of lack of exercise, continuing to eat as I was, comfort eating because of feeling unwell and wishing I could crawl into a corner and die quietly, meant that the route I had chosen did not work for me at that time. Food very much became my demon again.
I have learnt a lot about myself over the past few weeks, and now have to face the fact that I really do still have a problem with food. In bad times I invariably turn to it to mask the problems that I have. I have done it 2 or 3 times in the past year. I now need to take my own advice that I have given out in this very forum ..... using food to mask a problem is only a temporary solution. Once you have eaten the food, the problem is still there as big, bad, and ugly as it was before, only now you are heavier and feeling bad obout that too. Food has got to me for the last time. This time I will break its hold on me once and for all, and I will not turn to it again. I will get to target, and I will stay there.
Tomorrow is a new day, and a new start.
Steve.
As of tomorrow, I will be restarting CD, hopefully for the last time. I did decide to go another way a couple of months ago, but that did not really work - many reasons, far too many and personal to go into here. Anyway, everything is sorted out (I hope), and I am ready to go for it again. I am back in a job, and after 5 weeks am now well enough established that I can "calm down" and focus some of my attention back onto myself and what I need. I have also (almost) recovered from a bad pectoral muscle pull, which I can assure anyone who has not had to experience such a thing, is very painful indeed For 3 weeks now I have had stabbing pains across my chest, back, down my spine, and in my neck. The problem with such things is that you always tend to favour the painful area, sit in strange ways, and as a result the problem gets worse and spreads ..... Naturally, the fact that I could hardly move without winceing put me out of action exercise wise 100%, just as I was getting into a routine as well. My trainer was all for lightening the exercise regime and "working through it" ..... I told him what he could do with that idea . Looking back, it may have been better to follow his advice, but hindsight is a wonderful thing.
Any way, a combination of lack of exercise, continuing to eat as I was, comfort eating because of feeling unwell and wishing I could crawl into a corner and die quietly, meant that the route I had chosen did not work for me at that time. Food very much became my demon again.
I have learnt a lot about myself over the past few weeks, and now have to face the fact that I really do still have a problem with food. In bad times I invariably turn to it to mask the problems that I have. I have done it 2 or 3 times in the past year. I now need to take my own advice that I have given out in this very forum ..... using food to mask a problem is only a temporary solution. Once you have eaten the food, the problem is still there as big, bad, and ugly as it was before, only now you are heavier and feeling bad obout that too. Food has got to me for the last time. This time I will break its hold on me once and for all, and I will not turn to it again. I will get to target, and I will stay there.
Tomorrow is a new day, and a new start.
Steve.