Ughhhhhhhhhh

Discussion in 'Lighter Life Forum' started by emzski, 11 November 2008 Social URL.

  1. emzski

    emzski Full Member

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    Today I went to the toddler group with my son, I go to it every week and all my friends from school who have kids go too. Today the whole conversation seemed to be about diets, losing weight, peoples husbands losing weight etc. Not one person has noticed I have lost weight. I am really pissed off that they dont even notice! I wanted to say Oh ive lost 2 stone but I didnt feel comfortable saying it. I was wearing size 14 jeans and I used to be size 18. One girl was boasting about losing 7lbs and eveyone was saying oh you can totally see it. My cousin, my OH & my mum all keep telling me how great I look and the girls in the class last night all commented on how diffrent I look now.

    Just feel a bit let down none of them have noticed. I guess if I turned up with a big sign stating my weight loss they might say something...... prob not though!
     
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  3. bekimo

    bekimo Fighting Demons....

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    Perhaps they are all on diets because you look so good? Perhaps the conversation started because they all saw a change in you and then didnt say anything because you didn't say anything and they thought it may offend you? Or perhaps they are all very jealous of your success and just being mean not saying how well you've done?!

    At the end of the day, the people who matter HAVE noticed. Your family, your OH and YOU!

    I think you're doing great honey!

    B x
     
  4. notts_bhoy

    notts_bhoy Full Member

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    could not agree more , you are doing fantastic ! :) , i know the feeling though , a few days back i posted on here asking when do people tend to notice ? , i have lost over 2 stone now and not one person outside my family has noticed, it does get to you although i guess in my case it is because i was big and still am big ( just me who notices i am not AS big :D )
     
  5. emzski

    emzski Full Member

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    Thanks.

    I have been quite happy knowing my losses each week and seeing the changes in myself, I always said that as long as I can see the changes that is what counts. I guess with all the diet talk I thought maybe someone would say something.

    Perhaps some of them have noticed and are a bit jealous and didn't want to say, I guess there are lots of reason some people dont like to comment. Ill just have to get all dressed up in something special for our christmas night out or some other event so that they cant help but notice!!
     
  6. Strictly Shaz

    Strictly Shaz Full Member

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    Hi Emski,

    What a horrible group of people at your parents + toddlers group !!!

    I'm having enough problems with non LL people saying things to me about how dangerous the diet is + that I will put it all back on afterwards etc ....

    If you then have to deal with ignorant / rude people who deliberately ignore how much you have lost that must be even MORE annoying.

    EMSKI -- I am absolutely sure those people have noticed + were being extremely rude not mentioning your weight loss, but talking about everybody else's.

    I think people are jealous -- they are jealous of us having taken the "alternative" option -- the non food diet route which actually produces AMAZING results!

    Best wishes,
    Sharon
     
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  7. Polly740

    Polly740 Full Member

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    GO ON SHAZ!!!

    Very nicely said.

    You are lovely Emz, and if they can't comment on the difference in you then they are either rude or stupid....or both.

    <Rebellious child steps back off the box> :D

    xx
     
  8. mommyB

    mommyB love it

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    emski if it helps , i went to a slimming club some years back where there was a lovely lady who hadn't told her hubby she was dieting cos she wanted to surprise him, she had lost 4and half stone and he still hadn't noticed. HIS OWN WIFE !!
    I dont think we'd ve still been married.
    WEll done on your weight loss and dont let a few ignorant people bring you down
     
  9. MandyLupton

    MandyLupton Gold Member

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    Em, They have noticed but are probably just jealous. Petty really. It really doesn't hurt to give someone who has worked hard to lose weight a compliment.
     
  10. lolo

    lolo Silver Member

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    I found a lot of people said nothing to me until I had lost nearly 3 stone,you know you have lost it and feel good about yourself and that is what really counts.Next time blow your own trumpet and tell them how much you have lost.
    lolo x
     
  11. emzski

    emzski Full Member

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    Thanks everyone. The more I think about it the more I am sure they have noticed and are prob a bit jealous or miffed that Ive got of my bum to do something. One friend even said "Why are you not having a cake" I just said I'm trying to be good, she didnt say anything else! Im happy I know im going to be slim and happy in 2009 and they will prob still be eating all the sandwhiches and cakes talking about diets!
     
  12. Cherry Plum

    Cherry Plum One day at a time

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    Emski,
    You've done really well & as others have said it is around the 2 stone mark that people start to notice.
    Also they could just be jealous that you've lost so much weight.
    They probably only commented on the other girl because she mentioned it.
    So don't worry & keep going til you reach your goal weight & then they'll have something to say about your loss!
     
  13. babs11

    babs11 Full Member

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    i've lost just over 3 stone now and people are just starting to notice.
    dont worry hun you know you've lost it and you must be looking fab when you get to goal just go to that group in the clingiest outfit ever!!
    i was almost 15 stone at the start yet some people say to me you wasnt very big!!
    some people have said oh you've had your hair cut, because i look different but they're not sure why.
    x
     
  14. pete10141748

    pete10141748 Postaholic

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    I had this at work today.
    The receptionist, who I see every day and often chat to here and there during breaks etc. said something like
    "you know, you look...different today.... did you do something with your hair?"

    I didn't tell her about my diet/weight loss, I just said I'd been eating better and that's made me feel better, which is probably what she's noticed. On reflection, if I'd told her I'd lost a stone she would have probably been happy for me, but just didn't feel like sharing the news around the school just yet. Maybe once I've hit 2stone...


    As I said on another topic, when it comes to mentioning someone's weightloss, it's a very tricky thing. To say to someone (who was obviously overweight before) "Have you lost weight?" is really just a polite way of saying "Hey, you don't look so fat now", and many people wouldn't be comfortable with saying something, just the same as I would never turn round to a colleague and say something like "you're looking a bit warm, are you having a hot flush?"

    OK sounds daft but it's in the same league of comments IMO.

    Also, it may sound harsh but it's certianly true, some people just WONT CARE. I know a whole bunch of people from work and in my real life too, who wouldn't care one way or the other if I'm fat, thin or anywhere in between. It's just the way they are.


    But yes, they probably were all just jealous, and the "arnt you having cake" comment was obviously them trying to make themselves feel better about them having cake, as if the thin person was having some too it wouldn't have just been the fatties gorging themselves :p
    twsited thinking at it's finest! :D
     
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  15. slendablenda

    slendablenda Gold Member

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    They've noticed all right !!!

    Hi Emski
    I've never met you and I've noticed. I've seen the changes in your photos.
    Those people will have noticed and been jealous, you bet.
    I've had different reactions from people at different stages. The same people who would never have dreamed of saying" you look very fat" now feel they can say "surely you are going to stop now" even though I still weigh more than them!
    I just say "thanks for noticing, I'm very proud of what I have achieved. "If they carry on I ask them how much they weigh! It usually shuts them up.
    Pete's right- there's a lot of crooked thinking out there.
    Keep it up. You are doing it for you - but be sure - they notice all right !!:flowers:
     
  16. emzski

    emzski Full Member

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    Thanks again everyone. I am so proud of what the change in me, not just weight but im taking more time with my hair and looking after skin. Im not going to let it bother me if they say something or not. The important people have notived and are supportive and thats what counts.

    Your guys are brill!
     
  17. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

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    Hi hon

    Only have time for a quick post before venturing into San Francisco and then the zoo...

    Don't be discouraged, though I totally understand. I had lost 3 stone, in short order. One lady at work had lost 1 stone in 2.5 months.

    Everyone was faling all over themselves and her with WOWs! OMGs! WELL DONE's!! Etc., etc., and all saying how FAST she had lost one stone.

    This was after my losing pounds weekly and not one comment.

    Like you I wanted to say something, and I did. that was the first moment I knew my condfidence was beginning to grow.

    I wheeled my chair over to my desk mate, and said, "Ya know....I will have you know, that I have lost three stone in 2 months, and not one of you lot have said a single word."., in a kind of a "so there!" tone of voice. I was pleasant, but I am sure my annoyance (and hurt) shone through.

    She was shocked - apologised, and said she had no idea I had been dieting. I adv her that I had kept it quiet, etc. She said she never looked at me 'that way'. (How she could miss 280 pounds is beyond me - but anyway....

    People are very strange, and there are a number of reasons why they do or do not say something to you. Some may feel they are being rude acknowleging a weight problem. SOme may be concerend you are ill, and others may be purely jealous or feel it highlights their owbn shortcomings which does make it difficult to congratulate others.

    Don't you worry young lady - soon, they will HAVE to say something. But in the mean time - thake great pride in knowing what you have accomplished, and that you are doing this really for you - not them - and when they wake up and see what you have accomplished, they will have to deal with their own feelings.

    You are doing superb. Don't let anyone rain on your parade - and if it makes you feel better, say something. I know it made me feel better. :)

    Keep rockin it Emz and you'll show them!!##xx
     
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  19. emzski

    emzski Full Member

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    THANKS!!!!! I was speaking to my cousin who comes to the group and she said they definitely would have noticed and would been jealous, she lost a lot of weight on WW and she said one of the girls in particular didn't say a word EVER!

    Next week I'm strutting into the hall looking my best and that will show them, if they dont say anything I will!!!

    you guys are great!
     
  20. MandyLupton

    MandyLupton Gold Member

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    You go girl!!!
     
  21. bekimo

    bekimo Fighting Demons....

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    Go Emzski!


    :party0011: :party0011: :party0011: :party0011: :party0011:


    (This is your very own cheer squad!)


    B x
     
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  22. emzski

    emzski Full Member

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    Thanks for my cheer squad, love them they must follow me everywhere!!

    :party0011::party0011::party0011::party0011::party0011:

    Oh look there they are!!!
     
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