Unhappy with the group I go to

[Micci]

Hi,

I could do with some feedback on this. In January I rejoined SW with a 12 week countdown.My weight loss went well and I got my first half stone sticker in 2 weeks.

Then I had a bit of a disaster, I was ill in hospital with a burst appendix and am still not very well - I've missed I think 3 weeks, I've lost track.

My issue is this - in all the previous groups I've been to the leader would be supportive of members between meetings, sending texts and emails and if someone suddenly went missing like I have, they would be asking if that person was Ok. The leader of this group has done nothing like this.

Also, at the groups, I felt very ignored. she missed me out when going round the group, then realised, said my loss and then asked what my goal for next week was - other members got the more intensive chat/support. This seems a very petty issue but as I also felt this was the most cliquey of all the groups I've ever been to (and I've been to a fair number, ms yo yo dieter that I am). On my third session I sat next to a group of people and tried to talk to them without much success, then another group sat the other side of me and the two groups talked over me, totally ignoring me until one lot got up and moved so they could talk without going over me.

All in all this gives me a very bad impression of this group and if I was new to SW I'd vow never to have anything to do with the organisation again.

Now, I could just go back to the lovely local group that I was just ashamed to go back to 'cos of trying and failing so many times but I don't know that I want to leave it there.

I could go back to the group I'm unhappy with and talk to the C, or talk to head office. This woman in an area co-cordinator for heavens sake.

Maybe I am being petty but I do feel let down by this group.

Also does anyone know the rules for a count down when you've missed sessions due to ill health? It would be nice to get some time back but I'm not expecting it.

Thanks.

 

[xMandyDx]

I was in hospital myself for an appendectomy not so long ago, and I texted my C from hospital to let her know I wouldn't be in group. She booked me in for a holiday, but I only missed one week, hobbling down the following week come hell or high water lol

Sounds to me like your major complaint is with the members of the group being rude. I don't think there's much the C can do about that. I would describe my own group as very close, but also welcoming to new members. Clique type attitudes never go down well anywhere.
About the C forgetting you... I don't know how she managed to do that! Our C reads it all out from her PDA... On the plus side, I bet she was embarrassed about it, and will remember you next time lol

If you feel very strongly, go back to your old group. But my line of thinking would be, I'm there for the information and to lose weight, not to make friends.

Good luck!

 

[Celerystalks]

I think I'd go back to your original group. Sounds like u miss them And I bet they'd be really happy to see you. NOBODY will be thinking any less of you. I'm sure most ppl attending sw have fallen off the wagon many times (I know I have. I'm a classic yoyoer) and the important thing is getting back on. Which you should be proud of yourself for doing, as I'm sure most ppl would be.

 

[kimmykins2008]

I would say go back to your old group, as mentioned no one will think any less of you as we all have blip periods we would all like to forget, the important thing is that you are back on it. I feel it is important to feel comfortable with the councilor and group of people you meet with week in week out, while it is rare they will ever become your best friends it is very nice to feel like they are remotely interested and supportive as we all should be, a good group and councilor should encourage each and every one of us on our journey!

 

[mrsthunderbolt]

Totally agree with the others, go where you feel comfortable. OK, you may be a bit embarrassed that you have gained weight but be proud of the fact that you are doing something to tackle it!

Unfortunately you can't do anything about missed weeks on a countdown, any absences have to be put in before they are purchased.

Wishing you a swift recovery.

 

[Micci]

Yes, I think you are all right. I signed up again for the support, I've been doing SW for so long now its second nature. It does seem wrong that the groups can have so much variety in quality, I see from posts here that some people are far from happy with their group. Its not good.

 

[Fruitybabe]

I would say go back to your old group. I have joined an left and am on my third time at my group. I did feel embarrassed and awful but once I got there my C and everyone else was so warm and welcoming I just couldn't see myself anywhere else.
Your C will welcome you back and the others I wouldn't be surprise if they did too. Everyone is in the same situation and support and help is what you need. Why not ring your old C if your nervous

 

[Scorpiolady2710]

Firstly, may I wish you a speedy recovery and you need to get back to 100% before you can concentrate on anything else.

Secondly, I agree with everyone that you should consider going back to your old group. It appears to me that you were more comfortable there and we all need that feeling on occasions. Your previous Consultant won't think any less of you for going back. In fact she will probably welcome you with open arms.

Being unhappy in the group will not help with your weight loss hun...and that's the reason you're going there.

Most of all, do whatever you feel happy with and alongside those people you feel more comfortable with.

It's your weight loss journey!