Unrealistic Expectations.

[Curly.Locks]

Does anyone have unrealistic expectations? I've just rejoined SW. At weigh-in this morning, I lost 2.5lbs, and I feel extremely disappointed with this. I'm ashamed to admit it, but I just ate so many things today, which I didn't even want. I think in the space of a few hours, I probably had a month's worth of syns. I know this is ridiculous and I'm embarrassed by it, but I feel like if I've only lost 2.5lbs after trying so hard, I might as well have had what I wanted and had a gain of a few pounds. It's ridiculous, I know, but how do I align my goals to more realistic targets?

 

[swansong1a]

Have you tried projecting that 2.5lbs forwards? If you have, and if your stats are correct, that means if you keep losing that much per week you'll be at goal in just 28 weeks, which is somewhere around the beginning of September. Wouldn't that be just amazingly awesome??? It's all about mental trickery in the end I reckon.

You could also try setting mini-goals for yourself and giving yourself non-food rewards for reaching them. I divided my journey into eight parts with the same number of lbs in each part. At the moment I'm just 2lb away from my first reward of a lovely new pair of purple Ugg slippers! My rewards get bigger as the journey progresses, which makes sense to me as I will have to work harder and for longer to achieve each one (also gives me time to save up, lol). When I get to goal this time I will be taking flying lessons, how exciting is that!

Incidentally, I lost 1.9lbs this week and did feel rather disappointed with that myself but my average remains over 2lbs per week and so I have to be proud of that, right? I asked myself, if a friend of mine had lost that much, would I be happy for them and tell them how well they'd done - and the answer is a resounding yes, of course I would, so I need to learn to apply that technique to myself as well. This may take some time but I'll get there in the end, and so will you. As I said at the beginning, mental trickery...

Congrats on the 2.5lbs, awesome job Curly! x

 

[JulesT]

Curly Locks - I know exactly how you feel! My thinking is so often the same as yours but the other respondent is so right. Try to look at the bigger picture, or, indeed, reverse the picture and imagine how gutted you would feel if you had put 2.5 pounds on or did so week after week, which is a possibility if you don't keep going. If I had been satisfied with a pound a week so many times previously, I would currently be a skeleton but, instead, I am heavier than ever! Yet again, in spite of the fact that my daughter is getting married in just 26 weeks and I have known the date since last September, because of my impatience I still have the same amount of weight to lose as I did last September! Just be so pleased with your loss, whatever it is, it is better than a gain and remember that, in fact, 2.5 pounds takes a lot of losing so be really, really pleased with your achievement. Just forget about the naughtiness - it's done now and can't be undone, just get back on track today and keep focussing on the future, not the past. You are not alone in your thinking, nor your behaviour, just honest!!! Keep going - we can do it! xxx

 

[Trixicle]

Take a deep breath and think logically.

A lot of people do have large losses in their first week BUT they don't just lose fat. Most of what they lose is retained water/their glycogen stores. It is recommended that you don't lose more than 2lbs a week. You have done really well! At a rate of losing 2lbs a week you should still be able to enjoy your food, not feel deprived and be able to maintain the weight loss long term instead of giving up after a couple of months. I have been doing SW since the beginning of Nov and have lost every week, even over Christmas. OK, there has been a week or 2 when it has only been 0.5lbs, but it has always been in the right direction. What you are starting with SW is a healthy plan for the rest of your life potentially.

Imagine a friend had told you they had lost 2.5lbs in a week - you would congratulate them, right? So don't be so hard on yourself!

 

[flashharry]

I completely understand where you're coming from. I generally have 1-2lb a week losses, and it totally feels like not a lot of loss for a huge amount of effort and making the right choices and planning and self restraint.

However I also agree with all the advice you've been given above. We could be more extreme and lose more weight faster, but is it sustainable and something we could stick with forever? Probably not. So of the two choices....make a change for life and lose slowly but keep losing, or lose quickly and eventually feel deprived and fall off the wagon because it doesn't fit with normal life, I know which I'd rather, and I have to keep reminding myself of that whenever I feel disappointed. It's not always easy though!

 

[lentil2]

I think also, we always want to lose weight and get to 'the end' fast....but what is 'the end'?

Yes 'the end' means our ultimate goal and hopefully a slimmer, healthier body but in regards to eating and food, there is no end! Its not like we reach goal and can then can go back to eating what we want. (well some of us do!! lol) This is supposed to be a way of life and although we may be able to relax a little more around food once we reach target, the fact is, we will always have to watch what we eat probably, to maintain. So, I try to look at it like this....what is the rush? This is how its going to be now. Time will come and go regardless of whether I lose weight or not, so I'll take the losses when they come!
A little profound maybe....but its the speech I often give myself!!!

 

[Hippopotamum]

It's a great first loss, well done. Try to visualise your losses to put it into context, if you imagine a can of beans for each pound and a pack of butter for every half pound, you've lost 2 cans and a pack of butter, try picking it up, it's quite heavy.

I think it is about our expectations, if you aim to lose 1lb every week and lost 2, you'd be happy, but if you aim for 3lb every week and lose 2 you'll be disappointed, just try to imagine losing a can of beans each week and any more is a huge bonus. x

 

[MidlandsChick]

Does anyone have unrealistic expectations? I've just rejoined SW. At weigh-in this morning, I lost 2.5lbs, and I feel extremely disappointed with this. I'm ashamed to admit it, but I just ate so many things today, which I didn't even want. I think in the space of a few hours, I probably had a month's worth of syns. I know this is ridiculous and I'm embarrassed by it, but I feel like if I've only lost 2.5lbs after trying so hard, I might as well have had what I wanted and had a gain of a few pounds. It's ridiculous, I know, but how do I align my goals to more realistic targets?

I do. I go for an hour long walk and nearly expect to be down a pound after it. I find visual aids really good - I have 77lbs to lose until I get to my personal target. I made a little chart with 77 boxes on it and every pound I lose, I shade in a box, starting at number 77. It doesn't look so much when it's all divided up, far less daunting. I have 4lbs until I get to my stone off, so in my head my long term goal is 4lbs. So if I lose 1lb this week, that's great, that's a quarter of what I need for my goal - plus I get to shade in another box!

It's completely psychological with me and that's been my problem every other time I've tried this, this is THE last time I'm doing it so any little trick that works is great. Maybe even buttons in a jar, or stickers? Or a pound for a pound with a picture of some lovely non-food treat at the end? Best of luck x

 

[chocko1]

Do they still have that disgusting, golden coloured blob of fake fat on display at SW meetings? If so, I think that represented 2lbs and, if so, well done, Curly. You've lost that and a little more besides! Wahoo!

Kathy x

 

[Curly.Locks]

Have you tried projecting that 2.5lbs forwards? If you have, and if your stats are correct, that means if you keep losing that much per week you'll be at goal in just 28 weeks, which is somewhere around the beginning of September. Wouldn't that be just amazingly awesome??? It's all about mental trickery in the end I reckon.

You could also try setting mini-goals for yourself and giving yourself non-food rewards for reaching them. I divided my journey into eight parts with the same number of lbs in each part. At the moment I'm just 2lb away from my first reward of a lovely new pair of purple Ugg slippers! My rewards get bigger as the journey progresses, which makes sense to me as I will have to work harder and for longer to achieve each one (also gives me time to save up, lol). When I get to goal this time I will be taking flying lessons, how exciting is that!

Incidentally, I lost 1.9lbs this week and did feel rather disappointed with that myself but my average remains over 2lbs per week and so I have to be proud of that, right? I asked myself, if a friend of mine had lost that much, would I be happy for them and tell them how well they'd done - and the answer is a resounding yes, of course I would, so I need to learn to apply that technique to myself as well. This may take some time but I'll get there in the end, and so will you. As I said at the beginning, mental trickery...

Congrats on the 2.5lbs, awesome job Curly! x

Wow! 28 weeks, is that all?! That sounds wonderful!

Thank you so much for your entire post. You have no idea how fantastic I feel after reading your message. I have noticed for the first time that my weight is displayed on my profile! It's something I would never mention in public so a public display and acknowledgement is a massive deal - BUT you know what, over the next 28 weeks/ seven months that number will keep on am dropping! At the moment its at 18st 4lbs. Now, I don't feel so bad after all!

Thank you so much! Xx

 

[Curly.Locks]

Curly Locks - I know exactly how you feel! My thinking is so often the same as yours but the other respondent is so right. Try to look at the bigger picture, or, indeed, reverse the picture and imagine how gutted you would feel if you had put 2.5 pounds on or did so week after week, which is a possibility if you don't keep going. If I had been satisfied with a pound a week so many times previously, I would currently be a skeleton but, instead, I am heavier than ever! Yet again, in spite of the fact that my daughter is getting married in just 26 weeks and I have known the date since last September, because of my impatience I still have the same amount of weight to lose as I did last September! Just be so pleased with your loss, whatever it is, it is better than a gain and remember that, in fact, 2.5 pounds takes a lot of losing so be really, really pleased with your achievement. Just forget about the naughtiness - it's done now and can't be undone, just get back on track today and keep focussing on the future, not the past. You are not alone in your thinking, nor your behaviour, just honest!!! Keep going - we can do it! xxx

Thank you for such an honest post. I don't know why we seem to self-sabotage. I suppose a big part of the process is changing sabotaging behaviours and thought processes over time.

Congratulations on your daughter's upcoming nuptials! I am sure you will be able to reach the target which you have. My own unrealistic expectations probably come from the fact that I have a family wedding in three months. I cannot lose 5 stones by then and don't expect to, but, I could definitely do two! Good luck with it! Xx

 

[Curly.Locks]

Take a deep breath and think logically.

A lot of people do have large losses in their first week BUT they don't just lose fat. Most of what they lose is retained water/their glycogen stores. It is recommended that you don't lose more than 2lbs a week. You have done really well! At a rate of losing 2lbs a week you should still be able to enjoy your food, not feel deprived and be able to maintain the weight loss long term instead of giving up after a couple of months. I have been doing SW since the beginning of Nov and have lost every week, even over Christmas. OK, there has been a week or 2 when it has only been 0.5lbs, but it has always been in the right direction. What you are starting with SW is a healthy plan for the rest of your life potentially.

Imagine a friend had told you they had lost 2.5lbs in a week - you would congratulate them, right? So don't be so hard on yourself!

Thank you very much. A very realistic post with scientifically sound advice. You are right- 2.5lbs compared with 6.5lbs the previous week does not sound anywhere near as impressive, but actually, it is a massive achievement.

Thank you once again. Xx

 

[Curly.Locks]

I completely understand where you're coming from. I generally have 1-2lb a week losses, and it totally feels like not a lot of loss for a huge amount of effort and making the right choices and planning and self restraint.

However I also agree with all the advice you've been given above. We could be more extreme and lose more weight faster, but is it sustainable and something we could stick with forever? Probably not. So of the two choices....make a change for life and lose slowly but keep losing, or lose quickly and eventually feel deprived and fall off the wagon because it doesn't fit with normal life, I know which I'd rather, and I have to keep reminding myself of that whenever I feel disappointed. It's not always easy though!

Thank you for posting. Yes, you're right, it is a life change and I would do well to remember that having ups and downs is a natural part of any aspect of life!

Thank you and good luck with your weight loss! Xx

 

[Curly.Locks]

I think also, we always want to lose weight and get to 'the end' fast....but what is 'the end'?

Yes 'the end' means our ultimate goal and hopefully a slimmer, healthier body but in regards to eating and food, there is no end! Its not like we reach goal and can then can go back to eating what we want. (well some of us do!! lol) This is supposed to be a way of life and although we may be able to relax a little more around food once we reach target, the fact is, we will always have to watch what we eat probably, to maintain. So, I try to look at it like this....what is the rush? This is how its going to be now. Time will come and go regardless of whether I lose weight or not, so I'll take the losses when they come!
A little profound maybe....but its the speech I often give myself!!!

Thank you for posting. Your advice is very realistic and it reminds me that I need to change my thinking and my lifestyle rather than just controlling what I put in my mouth.

It's about mind, body and soul! Xx

 

[Curly.Locks]

It's a great first loss, well done. Try to visualise your losses to put it into context, if you imagine a can of beans for each pound and a pack of butter for every half pound, you've lost 2 cans and a pack of butter, try picking it up, it's quite heavy.

I think it is about our expectations, if you aim to lose 1lb every week and lost 2, you'd be happy, but if you aim for 3lb every week and lose 2 you'll be disappointed, just try to imagine losing a can of beans each week and any more is a huge bonus. x

I didn't realise all of this. This provides a fantastic, practical comparison. Two cans of beans and some butter- that is quite heavy!

Thank you. Xx

 

[Curly.Locks]

I do. I go for an hour long walk and nearly expect to be down a pound after it. I find visual aids really good - I have 77lbs to lose until I get to my personal target. I made a little chart with 77 boxes on it and every pound I lose, I shade in a box, starting at number 77. It doesn't look so much when it's all divided up, far less daunting. I have 4lbs until I get to my stone off, so in my head my long term goal is 4lbs. So if I lose 1lb this week, that's great, that's a quarter of what I need for my goal - plus I get to shade in another box!

It's completely psychological with me and that's been my problem every other time I've tried this, this is THE last time I'm doing it so any little trick that works is great. Maybe even buttons in a jar, or stickers? Or a pound for a pound with a picture of some lovely non-food treat at the end? Best of luck x

Thank you for your message. I think this is a great way to go about your journey. I think fibding something similar where I can also chart my progress will definitely help me focus more on the positives and acknowledge my losses so that I can celebrate them for what they are rather than being a negative Nancy!

Cheers! Xx

 

[Curly.Locks]

Do they still have that disgusting, golden coloured blob of fake fat on display at SW meetings? If so, I think that represented 2lbs and, if so, well done, Curly. You've lost that and a little more besides! Wahoo!

Kathy x

Thank you, Kathy. Another very supportive message from you- it's ver much appreciated! Cheers! Xx

 

[swansong1a]

Wow! 28 weeks, is that all?! That sounds wonderful!

Thank you so much for your entire post. You have no idea how fantastic I feel after reading your message. I have noticed for the first time that my weight is displayed on my profile! It's something I would never mention in public so a public display and acknowledgement is a massive deal - BUT you know what, over the next 28 weeks/ seven months that number will keep on am dropping! At the moment its at 18st 4lbs. Now, I don't feel so bad after all!

Thank you so much! Xx

You're so welcome, I'm really glad I made you feel more positive - we all have these low moments, and I suppose we just have to learn to deal with them a little better each time. Hugs x

 

[broadsbean]

My new way of looking at this, to try and stop my unrealistic expectations causing me to sabotage myself , is that i didn't get this way overnight so why do i expect to lose it over night

I have accepted that this is now a life plan, agreed to take the good loses aswell as the bad, and most importantly not put so much pressure on myself, if this takes 10 years then so be it, it took much longer than that to gain it.
I quite like the buttons in a jar idea and think i might give it a go, It will be a good visual representation and something to keep as a reminder. It also gives me a fab new hobby collecting unusual buttons

 

[Eloira]

I don't know if it's been mentioned but anything lost is in the right direction! I only lost 1lb on my 3rd weigh and 1.5 on 4th....i was so disheartened but tried to look at it in the overall picture, also it was * week so I kinda shut up and plodded on. Evidently like you I had a few bad days during the week!
Don't give up, say to yourself "I lost those 2.5lbs in a week!! In one week!! Wooo" tell yourself you done amazingly, treat yourself to a new recipe it's what I do when I lose hehe I get creative slimming style XD
Hope this week goes amazingly for you