You wouldnt call me fat when i was fat....

Sarahdramateacher

Full Member
So why all of a sudden have you started saying I'm too skinny....!!!

Anyone else facing this? Weight loss is a difficult process and iv worked so hard and have lost 72lb (now at target weight!) this puts my BMI at the right number - SO I'm NOT too skinny or underweight...

Yet now, despite all my hard work, I'm now facing people being more critical about my weight...

"your too skinny"
"you've turned anorexic"
"your paranoid and insecure"
"you've changed and your boring"
"your a lollipop head"

Anyone else think ... Bugger it... I'll get fat (and obese and actually have health issues!!)
 
So why all of a sudden have you started saying I'm too skinny....!!!

Anyone else facing this? Weight loss is a difficult process and iv worked so hard and have lost 72lb (now at target weight!) this puts my BMI at the right number - SO I'm NOT too skinny or underweight...

Yet now, despite all my hard work, I'm now facing people being more critical about my weight...

"your too skinny"
"you've turned anorexic"
"your paranoid and insecure"
"you've changed and your boring"
"your a lollipop head"

Anyone else think ... Bugger it... I'll get fat (and obese and actually have health issues!!)
Yes know what you mean. I have lost over two stone and nearly at mt target weight, I was out last night and people where saying you too skinny and look lie a lollipop. I felt hurt as I have worked very hard to lost my weight and keep it off. I was overweight and not happy. But we'll done Sarahdramateacher on your weight lost xx
 
The comments have started for me too...and i'm still 2st overweight!!! What will they say when I'm at target weight????

I have a theory that people say that for 2 reasons: a) they're jealous and your taking responsibility for your weight and health threatens them and place them face to face with their own need to become healthier, b) they are well-intentioned but are so unused to seeing a slim version of you that it looks too skinny to them. I'm inclined to think that for most people, it is reason b) making them say these things.

Listen to yourself and your body. It's YOUR life, YOUR decision. For crying out loud, why do people feel they're entitled to comment on someone's body????

I get angry on your behalf, lol
 
It's sooooo annoying! Oh my goodness I'm so glad that others are in the same position (without sounding really mean!!!) because I'm sick of it!!!!!

Noone commented on my weight when I was clearly obese and people were ok to let me go out in ridiculously short tight dresses that looked very inappropriate when I was large... Now iv worked my arse off to get healthy, and slimmed down people feel the need to judge how I look and what I wear...!!! So annoying.

I think your right it must be a comparison between the old me and now... But then it winds me up as people wouldn't even comment on someone else who was 5ft9, size 12 and 10st11lb - and that's me!!

Size 12 is normal - if nothing else, it's actually still curvy and healthy!! So I'm NOT to skinny!!!!!!

Crumbs apologies - I'm so wound up about all of this!!!!! Incredibly annoying...! Leave me alone lol... X
 
No need to apologise, we all get upset by comments like that.

Wow, 5'9" and size 12: it's my goal! I'm the same height as you and hopefully in a few months, I'll be the same :) I bet you look stunning!

I see your first goal was 12st (probably because it takes us 5'9" ladies in the healthy BMI range?): did you struggle to go beyond? People make me doubt that I can reach a BMI 23...

In any case, you've done incredibly well! Well done xxx
 
Yeh 12stone was my goal to get my into just under the correct BMi but I wanted to try and get into the middle of healthy so that I could be in-between and have a bit of a space in case my weight was to fluctuate (which I don't want to let it obviously!!!) but I just wanted to get into the middle in case!

I got to 12 and then started moving up the cambridge steps... And slowly the weight loss slowed but I am still loosing slowly...

I got to in the 11s and made it my aim to get to in the 10's and not to get out... So now I know that I mustn't get back into 11!!! However getting from 11 into 10 was a struggle... It was as if my body was saying I will not let you be in the 10stones!!! Bugger you body - but I got there!!! Now I must maintain!!

How are you finding it all? Your doing so well! Just keep going and keep blinkers on and you will be soooo happy with the outcome!!!! :) Take a photo of your face and put it on a skinny person in a bikini and stick it on the fridge :) that's my thinspiration!!!! X
 
Hi Sandra, I seem to be answering a few of your posts today, lol. I've had this too - I started out at 21.5 stone and am now 13st 3lbs, and people, mostly colleagues, are really shocked that I'm still trying to lose more. I'm 5'8", so my BMI is around 28 ie. overweight. I do think us tall girls can carry a bit extra without it being noticeable, to be honest, and as has also been said, people are used to seeing us with more padding so it's such a contrast. I don't personally intend to get to a sub-25 BMI - I'm 50 and thinking I'll look a bit wrinkly if go much lower, lol -so have set my goal at 12.5 stone. You do what feels best for you, but don't get too hung up on BMI, which I think most people now recognise as being a flawed measuring tool. :) xx
 
The timing of the post is apt for me since it was only a couple of days ago I had the exact same rant on my diary. I'm just over 1st from target which will put me right in the middle of a normal BMI.

I keep being told I need to stop now. I am at the point where I want to lift my top up, grab my tummy fat and shake it at them, shouting really??!! I actually demonstrated that to my mum earlier, she was in fits of laughter lol.

I actually got it from my dad this morning, to which I responded "not you as we'll??!"

Just because I am a lot thinner than before, am I not allowed to be slim? Noone says anything to the girl who is slimmer than me, but always has been!!

Grrrrr! I feel your pain!
 
Yeh 12stone was my goal to get my into just under the correct BMi but I wanted to try and get into the middle of healthy so that I could be in-between and have a bit of a space in case my weight was to fluctuate (which I don't want to let it obviously!!!) but I just wanted to get into the middle in case!

I got to 12 and then started moving up the cambridge steps... And slowly the weight loss slowed but I am still loosing slowly...

I got to in the 11s and made it my aim to get to in the 10's and not to get out... So now I know that I mustn't get back into 11!!! However getting from 11 into 10 was a struggle... It was as if my body was saying I will not let you be in the 10stones!!! Bugger you body - but I got there!!! Now I must maintain!!

How are you finding it all? Your doing so well! Just keep going and keep blinkers on and you will be soooo happy with the outcome!!!! :) Take a photo of your face and put it on a skinny person in a bikini and stick it on the fridge :) that's my thinspiration!!!! X

I'm finding it a bit though at the moment as I'm back to it after a week off. I'm obsessed with food lol. Soon I know I'll forget to eat and this can't come soon enough :D I might try the picture tip!!!

I wish you good luck with maintenance. You'll get there, we'll get there. Let's ignore people's comments and focus on our well-being :)
 
The timing of the post is apt for me since it was only a couple of days ago I had the exact same rant on my diary. I'm just over 1st from target which will put me right in the middle of a normal BMI.

I keep being told I need to stop now. I am at the point where I want to lift my top up, grab my tummy fat and shake it at them, shouting really??!! I actually demonstrated that to my mum earlier, she was in fits of laughter lol.

I actually got it from my dad this morning, to which I responded "not you as we'll??!"

Just because I am a lot thinner than before, am I not allowed to be slim? Noone says anything to the girl who is slimmer than me, but always has been!!

Grrrrr! I feel your pain!

It's funny you should say that about your diary because I talked about the exact same things a few days ago!!! I think it's because we wear more revealing clothing now that it's warmer and our figures stand out more. I don't know... I have the added problem of being a pear-shape: my top is really thin but my bum and thighs are still huge! But because I hide them in a-line skirts, people don't see that. Maybe I, too, should remove my skirt and shake my wobbly bits LOL :D

And I agree with you again about the fact that people don't comment on already thin people's figure. Bah, humbug!! ;)
 
Book-Worm said:
It's funny you should say that about your diary because I talked about the exact same things a few days ago!!! I think it's because we wear more revealing clothing now that it's warmer and our figures stand out more. I don't know... I have the added problem of being a pear-shape: my top is really thin but my bum and thighs are still huge! But because I hide them in a-line skirts, people don't see that. Maybe I, too, should remove my skirt and shake my wobbly bits LOL :D

And I agree with you again about the fact that people don't comment on already thin people's figure. Bah, humbug!! ;)

Lol, that's me too, but the opposite because I'm an apple - my legs are skinny and my bum has disappeared, and If I wear skinny jeans it's quite noticeable, but I'm hiding my big belly under a baggy top! :D xx
 
Oh my god I can totally relate! I've lost 8 1/2 stone, my BMI is now 23 but my goal is to be 11:7 stone I'm currently 11:11 so not far off but people are so vocal About it calling skeleton and sting 'where else can it go from' what they don't realise is that when you start to eat carbs you need a few pounds below target to act as a buffer in case you gain! I'm currently a size 12/10 after years of people telling me 'well it's not like you'll ever be a size 10!' In the most patronising you'll always be fat miserable and alone time!

You know you're own body and what's right for you! I dont think it helps that I'm so tall 5'11! I've got no shape just lanky now lol but I can see hip bones poking out now... If only I could tone up the jelly belly lol I'm sure there's at least a good 6lbs of skin in that baby alone lol! I think we don't realise how small we are in real life as I always believed when I was a size 22 that a 14 was thin, now it's massive in me and my brain can't get round the sizes that I need to buy now lol!

That said my CDC did warn me about other people being jealous/ reacting negatively as your light shines and it dims on theirs somewhat and i thought nah not the people I know but I can even see people in the street looking at me funny! I'm like seriously I was three times your size this time last year! Take no notice Hun, you keep going! Just think of how fabulous you look already and what's to come when you get to goal! :D
 
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shazzy_shaz said:
Oh my god I can totally relate! I've lost 8 1/2 stone, my BMI is now 23 but my goal is to be 11:7 stone I'm currently 11:11 so not far off but people are so vocal About it calling skeleton and sting 'where else can it go from' what they don't realise is that when you start to eat carbs you need a few pounds below target to act as a buffer in case you gain! I'm currently a size 12/10 after years of people telling me 'well it's not like you'll ever be a size 10!' In the most patronising you'll always be fat miserable and alone time!

You know you're own body and what's right for you! I dont think it helps that I'm so tall 5'11! I've got no shape just lanky now lol but I can see hip bones poking out now... If only I could tone up the jelly belly lol I'm sure there's at least a good 6lbs of skin in that baby alone lol! I think we don't realise how small we are in real life as I always believed when I was a size 22 that a 14 was thin, now it's massive in me and my brain can't get round the sizes that I need to buy now lol!

That said my CDC did warn me about other people being jealous/ reacting negatively as your light shines and it dims on theirs somewhat and i thought nah not the people I know but I can even see people in the street looking at me funny! I'm like seriously I was three times your size this time last year! Take no notice Hun, you keep going! Just think of how fabulous you look already and what's to come when you get to goal! :D

Well done, that's great! Yes, it could well be that you're carrying extra weight in the form of loose skin, I know I am, even though it's not too bad, and it's one reason I'm not stressing about BMI, because it doesn't take that into account. :) xxx
 
Lol, that's me too, but the opposite because I'm an apple - my legs are skinny and my bum has disappeared, and If I wear skinny jeans it's quite noticeable, but I'm hiding my big belly under a baggy top! :D xx

My mum is an apple too and was hiding her mid range as well. So her legs appeared so thin, as well as her arms (my mum is very toned, more than me!). Anyway, the perfect woman doesn't exist :)
 
Book-Worm said:
My mum is an apple too and was hiding her mid range as well. So her legs appeared so thin, as well as her arms (my mum is very toned, more than me!). Anyway, the perfect woman doesn't exist :)

Nope, certainly doesn't, lol. It's a pity we don't get to pick our shapes! :) xx
 
I think we should just be like "bugger all of you!!" we should be so proud of our achievement as weight loss is such a hard thing!!! - takes a complete life change and so much commitment and dedication!!

I'm so proud of all of you :) because I know how hard it's been for me and like you all said - we know our bodies and we are the most critical about our wobbly bits - we know when we need to stop loosing!!

Keep up the amazing work ladies - and bugger those who have negative things to say - jealousy/shock like you've said! Listen to those who really matter to you (and if they turn negative listen to your head - because that's the thing that made you take this amazing step in life realising you needed to loose, your head will be able to stop you when you take it too far!! - we have good heads on our shoulders :)

Xxx
 
Excellent post Sarah, I agree 100%. We should be proud of ourselves and we should celebrate our decisions to do something positive in our lives. Dieting is indeed hard, and I bet maintenance must be even harder (losing motivates you, at least me and I often worry about maintenance).

It seems like fat people's bodies do not belong to them anymore but that we should be grateful for any comment sent our way. When we're fat, we're told to slim down, often by complete strangers, on the street or in the media. Often it is accompanied by a look of false pity, as if they were trying to hide the fact that they're in fact picking on someone fat to make themselves feel good.

And when we're slimming down, we are automatically opened to some more abuse of a more pernicious kind this time, as attested by this thread. I am certain that my relatives are making comments because they're genuinely looking out for me, they just want what's best for me. But complete strangers? They don't give a flying monkey about my health, so why pretend that's why they comment on my diet?

Oh my, I'm pretty incensed that early in the morning :D All this weightloss has given me even more energy: beware judgemental people, it might come back to bite you ;)

I'm raising my first litre of the day in honour of our resilience ladies :)
 
what i find just as bad is when people are complimenting you on weight loss and they think its acceptable to make comments like 'you've lost sooo much weight, you look much better than before, what a massive difference you looked too heavy before, etc' i find it quite insulting coz it makes u wonder what they thought of you before yoou lost weight and whats more, its not as if weight loss is guaranteed for life, what if you put weight back on??? does that mean they think you look awful again??? x
 
It's true too! Although for the compliments, I think some people may have been worried about us. I know my parents were. And when they told me they were proud of me for showing so much determination, I have to confess I beamed inside :D

But when my neighbour tells me that I look better... Er... What the... I just smile and change the topic LOL. I would NEVER dream of mentioning people's health unless they start talking about it first. So say a neighbour stopped smoking. If they tell me they stopped, I'll probably congratulate them as it must very hard! But if they don't tell me, who am I to comment? It's their lives! But as I said, I think fat (or former fat) people are fair game nowadays :(
 
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