Chelsea's charge to Goal!!!! (And beyond)

[Greeneyes11]

Seems like you had a reasonable day today Lorrayne, at least your Magnum fitted in with your calorie count so should be fine..... we dont have an ice cream man round our road as one of the mums up the road told him off for coming too late at 7pm, so he doesn't come again, I guess at least there is no temptation...

 

[Chelsea Lou]

Seems like you had a reasonable day today Lorrayne, at least your Magnum fitted in with your calorie count so should be fine..... we dont have an ice cream man round our road as one of the mums up the road told him off for coming too late at 7pm, so he doesn't come again, I guess at least there is no temptation...

Was reasonable up until I got home from work. See edit below!!!

Will do better today:sigh: You are putting me to shame on here, you are all being really sensible with your choices and I take my hat off to you xx

 

[Greeneyes11]

Looked at your edit Lorrayne, and if that was all you ate that day, although the magnum and bar of chocolate probably has a lot of fat and carbohydrate, I would still think you were very close to your 1000 cal daily allowance..... so dont beat yourself up too much about it. I just make sure I buy the children stuff I dont like very much, must admit I bought 3 CD bars this week and put them in the fridge and I do find them very hard to resist.... I really do try to keep stuff in the fridge that I dont like too much and also always use my debit card for purchases and dont carry any cash, that way I cannot pop out to the shops for a chocolate bar or ice-cream, I have only stuck to this diet by not having temptations put in my way. I was thinking of booking a table at an eat as much as you like chinese for hubbys birthday in 2 weeks time, but I think that will be just too much temptation, 1. because I love chinese and 2. because if I only had a plate full I wouldn't think I had got my moneys worth, so am wondering where else we could go with less temptation.

 

[Chelsea Lou]

I am an idiot. Spent all day yesterday being really sensible with my food choices, even the Magnum was ok, I figured that as long as my cals added up to 1000 then it wouldnt present a problem.

I leave for home and all I can think about on the way home is the bar of white chocolate and stawberry bits from Lidl and I was completely salivating like some slobbering hound. I virtually ran from the car park into Lidl and was scoffing it whilst walking to my apartment. What is wrong with me????????? Do I deep down think that I don't deserve to be healthier and slimmer?

Stupid thing is I weighed myself this morning and I'm back to 10st 10lbs. Which wont help as somewhere in this messed up brain of mine, I will have told myself that "Hey, eat huge choccie bars and lose lbs!!!" So now I am back to the weight I was when I last saw CDC.

Right.....after stiff talking to self. Eyes down for a full belly.................of healthy food.

Breakfast. Cup of tea

Mid-morning. Two cups of black coffee and 1ltr of sparkling water.

Lunch. Prawn salad from the snack trolley at work. Consisting of Prawns in mayo, hard boiled egg, little bit of tomato, lettuce, cucumber and some coleslaw.

Post the rest later. Have a great day everyone.

Ok......... Forgive me for I have sinned. Went to Lidl on the way home and bought TWO big bars of the white chocolate with the strawberry bits in and scoffed one whilst watching Andy Murray lose and was so peed off after the match that I started scoffing the 2nd bar!!! WTF!!!! Totally and utterly disappointed in myself and I phoned my original CDC Mandy. I am going to see her on Monday morning and go back to SS for a couple of weeks to get this 10lbs off and work with her up the plan after reaching goal. My head is all over the place and I feel like I need the security of SS but at the same time miss being able to have food. Grrrrrrrrrrrrr. Somebody shoot me!!!!!! Had some pieces of roast breast of chicken in the evening and two sips of wine. That is something that I dont seem to be enjoying at the moment, so not all bad.

 

[alexmummy07]

Hi Lorrayne

I hope you are ok hun. I know how hard this CD malarky is, and my word in this weather, it is even harder to stick to. Somehow this week even after a cr@py loss and in the heat I have still managed to stick to it, whilst keep thinking what is the point? The weight isn't shifting so why bother. BUT Lorrayne, you know how much you REALLY want to get to goal. I really do think a massive part of it is remembering why you/we started CD in the first place, and without putting ourselves down as such, trying to get back to that place to have the will to finish the job for good!

I know you can do this - and I think deep down you know you can too!
You're still posting on here and admitting any little blips and that is a massive part in the first place.
All these little things will lead you to success, and I know in such a short time you will be posting at goal.
Keep Posting, and keep going hun - I need you on this board, as you know/understand all the financial probs of CD, and so I am watching your diary carefully, as my shakes/bars/soups will run out in about a week and a half if I can't get back to CDC.

Claire xx

PS - Is Jess ok - no post from her for a while?xx

 

[Chelsea Lou]

Looked at your edit Lorrayne, and if that was all you ate that day, although the magnum and bar of chocolate probably has a lot of fat and carbohydrate, I would still think you were very close to your 1000 cal daily allowance..... so dont beat yourself up too much about it. I just make sure I buy the children stuff I dont like very much, must admit I bought 3 CD bars this week and put them in the fridge and I do find them very hard to resist.... I really do try to keep stuff in the fridge that I dont like too much and also always use my debit card for purchases and dont carry any cash, that way I cannot pop out to the shops for a chocolate bar or ice-cream, I have only stuck to this diet by not having temptations put in my way. I was thinking of booking a table at an eat as much as you like chinese for hubbys birthday in 2 weeks time, but I think that will be just too much temptation, 1. because I love chinese and 2. because if I only had a plate full I wouldn't think I had got my moneys worth, so am wondering where else we could go with less temptation.

Lol, Greeneyes, you havent seen the size of the chocolate bar!!! 1,000 cals on its own I must do my Paul McKenna and imagine it covered in maggots and barber-shop-floor hair and get repulsed!!!

You are like me, like to know I've got my money's worth!!!! That is another habit I have got to get myself out of!!! So much to learn. I personally would go somewhere where it is so expensive you can only afford a couple of things

 

[aussieraquel]

Lorrayne, I completely relate to where you are coming from right now. I will think all day about how fat and frumpy I am - how I need to stick to cd, and the next minute I am walking ito an offie buying a choc bar, or lollies....I dont know why we do it to ourselves, when we want this so much!

I started reading 'Eating Less' by Gillian Riley - recommeded by Laura....seems like it may be helpful, but I have not read enough to change my thoughts, yet!

 

[Chelsea Lou]

Hi Lorrayne

I hope you are ok hun. I know how hard this CD malarky is, and my word in this weather, it is even harder to stick to. Somehow this week even after a cr@py loss and in the heat I have still managed to stick to it, whilst keep thinking what is the point? The weight isn't shifting so why bother. BUT Lorrayne, you know how much you REALLY want to get to goal. I really do think a massive part of it is remembering why you/we started CD in the first place, and without putting ourselves down as such, trying to get back to that place to have the will to finish the job for good!

I know you can do this - and I think deep down you know you can too!
You're still posting on here and admitting any little blips and that is a massive part in the first place.
All these little things will lead you to success, and I know in such a short time you will be posting at goal.
Keep Posting, and keep going hun - I need you on this board, as you know/understand all the financial probs of CD, and so I am watching your diary carefully, as my shakes/bars/soups will run out in about a week and a half if I can't get back to CDC.

Claire xx

PS - Is Jess ok - no post from her for a while?xx

Claire, you are so sweet. Thank you for your words of encouragement and understanding. I will carry on but perhaps not quite the charge I was hoping for, towards goal :-(

I have to be absolutely honest about what I am eating, even if it is admitting to everyone that I am failing!!! I have lied to myself and others for so many years as to the amount of food I eat. We've all done it and say we can't understand why we haven't lost that week as we have been "so good" when the reality is big portions, the odd few biccies with a cuppa. Alcohol whose calories dont count because its a drink and not food

I had a first date with a guy on Tuesday and he really wants to see me again and I like him. A few months ago I would never have agreed to meet in the first place because of my size and I can't allow myself to get back to that person. We will do it, there is too much support and understanding not to do it.

Jess is ok. Not quite sure why she is not posting - a bit stressed over money and a permanent job but I am sure she reads everyones diaries so do keep on posting them xxx

 

[Chelsea Lou]

Lorrayne, I completely relate to where you are coming from right now. I will think all day about how fat and frumpy I am - how I need to stick to cd, and the next minute I am walking ito an offie buying a choc bar, or lollies....I dont know why we do it to ourselves, when we want this so much!

I started reading 'Eating Less' by Gillian Riley - recommeded by Laura....seems like it may be helpful, but I have not read enough to change my thoughts, yet!

Hiya honey, The book is really good, plenty of stuff to learn and put into practice. I just havent started yet!!! Trouble with me is I can't retain information much these days, so I have to keep referring to it. I wish I could read it, digest it and remember it ffs!!!!

Anyway, we will have to drag each other along and not let the other one fail! Along with all the other girlies. Do we have a deal?

 

[aussieraquel]

Yep Lorrayne, Deal!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lets make sure we keep up with how each other is going, this is a bigger battle than I thought

 

[LellyCD]

Hi Lorrayne, Hope you can put the past wobbles behind you and move on you've done well and you are only human after all!! I can reccommend another gerat book i am reading it's called 'If you eat at the refridgerator...pull up a chair!' by Geneen Roth, really helped me sorted out some demons in my head about my negative attitude about myself and how important it is to be kind to yourself, that you are worthy of kindness and you are the best person to do it...plus it's quite funny in places so a great read.

Gutted about the Murray match it was truly nailbiting and put me on a real downer afterwards too! picked myself by remembering that it's only a tennis game, now i'm rooting for Roddick, how about you? Not that i don't think Federer is great but I always love the underdog, loved watching the Nadal win last year it was fantastic, hasn't been the same without him this year. Will watch the ladies final but heyho same old, same old eh!

Wishing you a fab day today!

xx

 

[Chelsea Lou]

Morning everyone, Oh boy, what a weekend?!

My sister and I went to my daughter's to see her and the twins. My sis hadn't been able to get over to see them, so that was great. Bless my sis, she was so organised and had made sandwiches so that Laura wouldnt have to worry about fixing us lunch!! So I had a couple of triangles of Tuna & Sweetcorn and a banana. In the evening a friend came over and we walked into town to a Tapas Bar. Two champagne cocktails and a chicken salad later, we went back to mine and proceeded to get through three bottles of sparkling wine!!!

I 'came to' on Sunday morning covered in scratches and I mean covered. All over my body, arms, chest, throat. I vaguely remembered that I had tried to pick up my cat for a cuddle and she hates being picked up so she must have freaked out!!! What I hate is the fact that it is just a vague memory. I have not had a drink in the last 5 months, apart from a couple on my birthday, so it seems to have really affected me. I wasted the whole day yesterday feeling ill on the sofa.

I really didn't like how I felt and it has made me realise how much I don't miss alcohol and getting drunk. Food wise, tuna, lettuce, cous cous, tomato for dinner plus a choc shake (Jess still has some left).

Off to see CDC in a couple of hours and looking forward to going back to SS for a few weeks, in the hope that I can sort myself out. Hope you all have a great day xxx

 

[aussieraquel]

Good luck with your cdc today, hope you can sort things out. Lorrayne I used to drink socially on weekend and have a glass or two during the week, cd has made me not really miss it anymore. I dont miss the feeling the next day. I have had a few nights where I have had a drink recently, I dont mind having one, but I am no longer in the mindset to go out and get drunk to be social, its a nice feeling.

 

[Katycakes]

Hi Chels... have to post & run because I am still working away & running out of net time, but so glad to see your thread... will catch up properly later in week. Hope you are in good fettle, and keep on keeping on!


xxx

 

[Chelsea Lou]

It was so nice to see Mandy again yesterday. My weight had stayed the same from when I last saw her, which is nothing short of miraculous considering...........we agreed that I should ss+ so that I am still having a little bit of food. Starting today - Tuesday.

Not a good start as up at 3:00am and ended up eating half a small tin of tuna as I felt so hungry which means there wont be a lot I can have for dinner tonight :cry:

Back at Laura's today, to give her a hand with the twins. Had loads of cuddles yesterday, which was fab. Cannot believe they are 7 weeks old today and weren't actually due until next Tuesday!!!!!

Hope you all have a great Tuesday xxx

Lou.... Excited to be meeting up with Ashley Jenkings after 36 years!!!! Roll on Thursday

 

[alexmummy07]

Hi Lorrayne

I'm glad you had a positive chat with your CDC, even more so that you have STS - that's fab - and must have given you a boost aswell!

I really do have all my fingers and toes crossed for you to have a fantastic week this week, and I'm sure you will do.
I'm not sure what the Tuna allowance is for SS - but I know for 810 it is 2 tins, so it could well be that you have more left than you think? (sorry if I'm totally wrong, I haven't got my book to hand)

Hope you have a lovely day with your daughter and grandchildren - I bet they are tinyyy!!

xx

 

[Greeneyes11]

Glad to see your CDC is so good for you, hows it going today, I haven't actually lost anything yet this week, but we shall see tomorrow and WI whether I have or not... enjoy your day with your grand children, how great is it to hand them back at the end of the day.... lol

 

[Katycakes]

Chels have just read thru your diary, good for you being so honest and sticking with it, you will get there hon if you keep posting and keep on track. I'm glad you have the support of your CDC again, going it alone can be scary and trust me you are not the only one to find the whole food thing a challenge. It took us years to acquire all those bad habits so its not realistic to expect to ditch them overnight. But the books help, and CD helps, and WE can help each other - minis is just a lifesaver for me.

So hang on in there Chels, and send a hug to Jess as well!

xxx

 

[alexmummy07]

Hey Hun

How are you getting on back on SS+?
I hope you're doing ok and things are picking up for you.
You know this is just a journey, and whichever route we take, even if we stop for petrol, or an overnight break here and there, providing we keep in our head (and on the sat nav in my case) where we're going, we will get there, no matter how long it takes. xx

 

[Katycakes]

Where are you Chels?

xxxx