Letty
Full Member
Hi all,
Well, some may have seen in previous posts that I have kept my doing CD a bit of a secret from friends and family, except for my OH until now. This last week, I decided it was getting too difficult to keep it from people, and my OH said he wasn't always comfortable fibbing for me, so it was time to come clean.
I think there are a few reasons that I was keen to keep it quiet. No one wants to have to admit out loud that they are overweight, and I suppose that I thought if I talked about it to them (I am the only person I know that struggles with their weight, really) I would also have to talk about why I had got big, which was related to a period of depression last year, and I just didn't want to drag that up.
As well as that, I admit to feeling a little ashamed of it. It might sound odd, but I thought they might think it was a lazy, easy way out- as an example, my brother-in-law is a real gym freak and thinks fat people are just lazy and that only lazy people have to count calories.
Now, we all know that if you haven't had a weight problem, you can't possibly understand how it feels, and since so many of my F&F are naturally slim, I assumed that they couldn't understand this and would think, at best, it was a fad, a foolish thing to do, and at worst a lazy way to lose weight, with choruses of 'why can't you just eat healthily and do a bit of exercise?'. In fact, I do eat healthily and until last year did lots of exercise and I wasn't about to be lectured about it by people who, while having my best interests at heart, really couldn't understand.
So I started with my most sympathetic friend, a nurse, and she couldn't have been more understanding. Bolstered by this, I told two very skinny friends as we were going to theirs for dinner. They also were really understanding, and didn't ask me lots of questions about it. I then moved on to my mother-in-law, a notorious fat-fascist who is very skinny naturally and berates her own daughter for being, as she puts it, 'bonny'. Again, she was understanding and agreed that it sounded good.
Everyone was a little concerned for my health, but when I explained a little, it was fine. I'm sure that privately they will have conversations about how daft it seems, why can't I eat healthy food with it etc. But for the time being, it is really liberating to have it out in the open and be able to get on with it without massive strategising every time I am visiting people. I suppose I really should have given my loved ones a lot more credit- they love me after all, and will of course support me in what I want to do.
Anyway, I suppose the moral of this story is that the more people you have supporting you, the easier everything will be and if your friends really want the best for you, they will support your weight loss. Everyone has expressed admiration at my will power and almost no one can believe how much I had to lose when I quote the numbers- they may just be being nice, but that's good to hear.
So, if you too are keeping it a secret, maybe it's time to consider spilling the beans. I for one feel so much better now and am even more confident of success.
Well, some may have seen in previous posts that I have kept my doing CD a bit of a secret from friends and family, except for my OH until now. This last week, I decided it was getting too difficult to keep it from people, and my OH said he wasn't always comfortable fibbing for me, so it was time to come clean.
I think there are a few reasons that I was keen to keep it quiet. No one wants to have to admit out loud that they are overweight, and I suppose that I thought if I talked about it to them (I am the only person I know that struggles with their weight, really) I would also have to talk about why I had got big, which was related to a period of depression last year, and I just didn't want to drag that up.
As well as that, I admit to feeling a little ashamed of it. It might sound odd, but I thought they might think it was a lazy, easy way out- as an example, my brother-in-law is a real gym freak and thinks fat people are just lazy and that only lazy people have to count calories.
Now, we all know that if you haven't had a weight problem, you can't possibly understand how it feels, and since so many of my F&F are naturally slim, I assumed that they couldn't understand this and would think, at best, it was a fad, a foolish thing to do, and at worst a lazy way to lose weight, with choruses of 'why can't you just eat healthily and do a bit of exercise?'. In fact, I do eat healthily and until last year did lots of exercise and I wasn't about to be lectured about it by people who, while having my best interests at heart, really couldn't understand.
So I started with my most sympathetic friend, a nurse, and she couldn't have been more understanding. Bolstered by this, I told two very skinny friends as we were going to theirs for dinner. They also were really understanding, and didn't ask me lots of questions about it. I then moved on to my mother-in-law, a notorious fat-fascist who is very skinny naturally and berates her own daughter for being, as she puts it, 'bonny'. Again, she was understanding and agreed that it sounded good.
Everyone was a little concerned for my health, but when I explained a little, it was fine. I'm sure that privately they will have conversations about how daft it seems, why can't I eat healthy food with it etc. But for the time being, it is really liberating to have it out in the open and be able to get on with it without massive strategising every time I am visiting people. I suppose I really should have given my loved ones a lot more credit- they love me after all, and will of course support me in what I want to do.
Anyway, I suppose the moral of this story is that the more people you have supporting you, the easier everything will be and if your friends really want the best for you, they will support your weight loss. Everyone has expressed admiration at my will power and almost no one can believe how much I had to lose when I quote the numbers- they may just be being nice, but that's good to hear.
So, if you too are keeping it a secret, maybe it's time to consider spilling the beans. I for one feel so much better now and am even more confident of success.