Depressed!! :(

[confused123]

Hi all

It is currently 5:45am and snowing outside. I am sat on my bed with my laptop as I am in tears due to severe anxiety and depression about my weight.

I am the biggest I have ever been at 96kg. (probably a little more in the morning as I have binged for a straight 4hrs)

I feel so down and don't feel good at all. weight has always been an issue for me and I have always been on the heavier side.

I am 15 stones, would love to be at 10 stones.

My problem is I always find an excuse to eat. Whenever i decide to start my cambridge packs i always talk myself out of it. I will do it for 2 days and binge for 5. but now enough is enough, I have never felt so ashamed while looking at myself.

I lost 3 stones on cambridge in 2015 and went down to 11stones and 7 pounds. that was the lightest i have ever been and now everyone that meets me are shocked that i put it all back on and i feel i am cornered and as if i have brought shame upon myself.

I am not comfortable in my own skin and for a 27yr old i have a saggy stomach and body issues. i am now suffering from body acne and the dr told me it is because of my weight.
This is the lowest I have ever been.

I need to stay motivated and do this and prove everyone wrong. And show the world I can do it and keep it off for the rest of my life.
I want to feel like me and feel good like i felt when i was 11.7stones.
I am so angry at myself that i went half way and let go.

I am so down. I wanted to note my feelings down because whenever I am about to lose track, i can come back to this post and remind myself of this feeling.

Plz support me xxx

 

[Curvie]

I think most people can possibly relate to how your currently feeling about your body. Can I ask to why your CDC isn't supporting you right now? week 1 is always hard, but these low calorie diets are so fast and quick. like you I got down to 11stones and now I am 15 stones eeekk.

what day are you on today??

 

[confused123]

I think most people can possibly relate to how your currently feeling about your body. Can I ask to why your CDC isn't supporting you right now? week 1 is always hard, but these low calorie diets are so fast and quick. like you I got down to 11stones and now I am 15 stones eeekk.

what day are you on today??

Hey! I am on day 1. it was a fresh start today.
How much have you lost so far and on what day are you on?

 

[Charlie Marsden]

Hey! I am on day 1. it was a fresh start today.
How much have you lost so far and on what day are you on?

Hi Hun,

How are u getting on?

I know how I are feeling, just think if u put your mind to this it's not forever I fact 16 weeks u could have that 4 stone off!

I'm on week three, I've lost 13lb in 2 weeks.

Hope your ok and feeling positive

Char x

 

[Happy123]

Hi It's my second week I have tried this diet three times now But this is the longest I've stuck to it
I'm doing ss+ as I find it a lot easier for myself But on Wednesday I'm going to try ss for that week see how it goes

 

[Charlie Marsden]

Hi It's my second week I have tried this diet three times now But this is the longest I've stuck to it
I'm doing ss+ as I find it a lot easier for myself But on Wednesday I'm going to try ss for that week see how it goes

I'm on ss+ how did u get on first week Hun?

What have u been having for ur meal?

 

[Happy123]

I'm on ss+ how did u get on first week Hun?

What have u been having for ur meal?

Omelette with a very little beans
Chicken stuffed with spinach
Chicken and veg
Roasted Aubergine topped with tomatoes and basil
Just making it up as I go so I don't get bored and I stick to it this time
How are you finding it
I'm finding ok so far

 

[Charlie Marsden]

Yeah ok, weekends r hard.

I'm looking for a job at the moment and temping on and off. Been for an interview today but haven't heard anything. Feeling fed up with it all and usually I would eat for comfort but trying to stay strong.

I have 5 stone to loose, how about u?

Char x

 

[Happy123]

Yeah ok, weekends r hard.

I'm looking for a job at the moment and temping on and off. Been for an interview today but haven't heard anything. Feeling fed up with it all and usually I would eat for comfort but trying to stay strong.

I have 5 stone to loose, how about u?

Char x

Aww Hun I no its not easy I need to loose 5 stone to really want to loose 4stone by May as I'm going on holiday stay strong you can do this

 

[Charlie Marsden]

Aww Hun I no its not easy I need to loose 5 stone to really want to loose 4stone by May as I'm going on holiday stay strong you can do this

Yes I'm going on holiday on the 6th June, I would love to have lost my weight then.

I have been on so many holiday fat and u happy, thinking everyone is looking at me n laughing With my big fat legs round the pool.

Do u have any occasions coming up. I'm meant to be going out valentine weekend and then in April. I'm defo having a night of for both of these.

I don't tend to do much when I'm on the shakes coz my life usually revolves around food and wine. Sad really...

Char x

 

[Happy123]

Yes I'm going on holiday on the 6th June, I would love to have lost my weight then.

I have been on so many holiday fat and u happy, thinking everyone is looking at me n laughing With my big fat legs round the pool.

Do u have any occasions coming up. I'm meant to be going out valentine weekend and then in April. I'm defo having a night of for both of these.

I don't tend to do much when I'm on the shakes coz my life usually revolves around food and wine. Sad really...

Char x

Omg I feel the same I no you can do this I find it hard as I'm always at home cooking for the children and do feel tempted at times but all I keep thinking about is holiday I hate when people look at me and all I think is there saying she is fat
My anniversary is coming up
If you don't mind me asking how old are you?

 

[Charlie Marsden]

Omg I feel the same I no you can do this I find it hard as I'm always at home cooking for the children and do feel tempted at times but all I keep thinking about is holiday I hate when people look at me and all I think is there saying she is fat
My anniversary is coming up
If you don't mind me asking how old are you?

Yep I think the same, I won't go in the sea because I don't want to walk from the beach into the sea I think everyone would be looking at me.

I'm 28, I have 2 children who are nearly 9 an 6. How old are u?

Have u tried the Tika rice? I had it tonight with chicken and mushrooms and dried chilli, it was nice!

Char x

 

[Kay003]

Confused123 - Hello lovely, here to sub , Well done for starting your own diary. How has your week been so far, how have you been getting on ? It would be good to hear from you.

Kay xx

 

[Happy123]

Yep I think the same, I won't go in the sea because I don't want to walk from the beach into the sea I think everyone would be looking at me.

I'm 28, I have 2 children who are nearly 9 an 6. How old are u?

Have u tried the Tika rice? I had it tonight with chicken and mushrooms and dried chilli, it was nice!

Char x

Hey Hun I'm 30 I got 4 young children 7 , 5 , Twins that are 4

Today I'm going to try to do ss for the week and see how it goes

I ain't tried tried it that meal b4

xxxx

 

[Happy123]

Hey everyone how's it all going for you all?

 

[enlightenme2]

Hi all

It is currently 5:45am and snowing outside. I am sat on my bed with my laptop as I am in tears due to severe anxiety and depression about my weight.

I am the biggest I have ever been at 96kg. (probably a little more in the morning as I have binged for a straight 4hrs)

I feel so down and don't feel good at all. weight has always been an issue for me and I have always been on the heavier side.

I am 15 stones, would love to be at 10 stones.

My problem is I always find an excuse to eat. Whenever i decide to start my cambridge packs i always talk myself out of it. I will do it for 2 days and binge for 5. but now enough is enough, I have never felt so ashamed while looking at myself.

I lost 3 stones on cambridge in 2015 and went down to 11stones and 7 pounds. that was the lightest i have ever been and now everyone that meets me are shocked that i put it all back on and i feel i am cornered and as if i have brought shame upon myself.

I am not comfortable in my own skin and for a 27yr old i have a saggy stomach and body issues. i am now suffering from body acne and the dr told me it is because of my weight.
This is the lowest I have ever been.

I need to stay motivated and do this and prove everyone wrong. And show the world I can do it and keep it off for the rest of my life.
I want to feel like me and feel good like i felt when i was 11.7stones.
I am so angry at myself that i went half way and let go.

I am so down. I wanted to note my feelings down because whenever I am about to lose track, i can come back to this post and remind myself of this feeling.

Plz support me xxx

Hey Confused how is it going? I'm really sorry to hear you're having such a hard time. I also come on here to encourage and be encouraged! No one around me ever diets and my kids are so marked by my on and off diet-mode that they never set the table without asking if I'm eating. I was such a food nazi last time and they were so young, I'm afraid I've scarred them!

Anyway, some people find solace in taking care of their bodies, like long bathes, mani-pedis etc - frankly that doesn't do the job for me, some catch up on their shows (I find many focus on dieting shows or cooking shows), others read self-help books and plan their maintenance plan phase - man I wish I were that organized! Shopping does the trick for me- getting out of the house etc - my husband says I'm only swapping one addiction for another and in some ways I think he's right... wish it were exercise though - that never really happened

So bottom line I guess I'm trying to say that you need to find what's right for you that will take your mind off of food! I remember a couple of years ago, for one gal it was ironing - I mean really ? Just take the time to discover you... and loosen up on the self-loathing - it's that little devil looking to defeat you before you make it to the finish line!
You got body issues? bet you'll feel better when you follow through on the plan... You can do it, we all can!

Phew sorry if that was long, but HTH! don't be a stranger, we're all here to help you, you're don't have to do this journey alone