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describe me...FAT!!

I watched a film today and the man was describing the girl he fancied, he didnt use ugly fat, bloated or unattractive...it made me think what would people, my friends , my ex use to describe me? FAT! I cant get that stupid three letter word out my head. Maybe becos i am fat and that is the word my ex used to describe me! I am fat, im overwieght, im unfit and unhealthy, so should i accept this word? Ive tried, but its so hard. When i go shopping and the clothes dont fit i think fatty lose weight, if its unflattering i think fat erghh. If i exercise and get out of breath and drip in sweat i think fatt...i dont want fat to be in the same sentence when people describe me. And i never ever want to be with a man who dumps me for being FAT!!
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Proud to be a LOSER :)
I wouldn't describe you as fat. I haven't seen a picture of you so I can't. So all I can say right now if you are an intelligent lady who deserved a better man than your pathetic ex. No man (or woman) should have the authority to label someone with such a hurtful word.

If you are overweight, then I say that is related to health. If you want to lose weight then there is nothing wrong with that, you are just making a choice to improve your healthy, by stopping putting pressure on your heart, organs and bones. Sounds pretty clever to me.
And then so what if while you're doing that you drop a few dress sizes, and start to feel better in clothes. You worked hard for it. It's the people who label others with nasty words that do so because they know they do not possess the same motivation and self esteem it takes to improve your life and change routines.

You said "
And i never ever want to be with a man who dumps me for being FAT!!
- good! Because you don't deserve it. Nobody does. You should be with someone who is happy no matter what size or weight you are! whether your 50st or 10st! And if you want to lose weight they should support that too!!

I think you need to build up your self esteem to stop relying on these horrid people. Look out for yourself, and someone will see your confidence from a mile off and want to get to know this amazing person better :D
Your ex sounds horrible - you are better off without him if he can't appreciate the person you are.

You do need to build up your confidence - just think of all the good things about you and all the good things that are going to happen now you are rid of that horrible man.:grouphugg:
Sending you a big hug


Silver Member
I seriously think people are unhealthily obsessed with other people's weight. The amount of fat cells our bodies carry does not affect our intelligence, compassion, talent, diligence, skills, qualifications, ability to parent or be a friend....the list goes on and on. Aside from the fact that someone else's body shape is none of their beeswax, what the hell does it matter? Why do people feel the need to comment?

The only important question is, how would you describe you? Have a go. List words that describe you and think about them. Why do you think that? Does it matter? Is it true?

Some women proudly call themselves fat, as a big two-fingers up to the kind of people who have hurt you. Fat fat fat. Yes I am. So? As long as you think you a good, kind, honest person (or whatever qualities you like about yourself), that word is irrelevent, and people are idiots for using it.
Totally agree with what the others have said..

Can I make a suggestion?? Change your user name... The reason we are all on here is because we have or have had a weight problem but we are all doing something about it.. If you use the name you've chosen then you are not going to be in the right mindset.

Just because your ex called you such a horrible name doesn't mean you need to use it youself.. You have to change your mindset to achieve your goal..Yes you will trip up along the way but we will all be here to support you..

So FabHaley... On wards and down wards and just keep in mind the look on your ex's face when you walk past him in a few months looking even more fantastic than you do now :D

If you want some inspiration go to the cc section and read Happyhealthy's diary. Not sure what diet your following but a lot of us are on my fitness pal..

Looking forward to following your progress :)
Now I dont see Fat as a bad word. I have spent my life as a fat bird and been proud of the fact. I have spent a lot of time in the BBW big beautiful woman community and enjoyed every minute of it. I was loved, cherished and found attractive. Horses for courses, some men love a lithe form others a more voluptuous one.

One of my ex's said that he would not marry me as I was fat, though i was good enough to look after his children and warm his bed! He even said it was my problem, at that stage I wised up and realised it was his.

So why am I on a forum designed for people to loose weight ? At the end of the day health issues. I'm tired and my knees ache.

Being Fat however does not have to be the end of ones confidence. I think you have to love what you are before you can do something good for yourself. I mean why bother to change if you hate yourself?

I agree with the change in screen name though, move towards what you want rather than what you dont.

All the best lovely x


*reformed* sugar junkie
+1 to what Clarabow said.

The word only has power if you let it. I mean, I don't mind being described as the fat girl, because 1) I am fat and 2) People usually pick a distinguishing feature about someone to describe someone so where one girl is the barbie with the big nose or the ginger girl with blue eyes, I'm the fat girl. I know lots of people do take issue with the word but I don't - it's a factual statement more than an insult as far as I am concerned.
I use the word fat for myself but wouldnt call someone else fat - I would say overweight or big probably. its not the word fat I find offence its usually what follows fat when someone is calling you names 'fat cow' 'fat heffer' 'fat whatever'.
I completely agree fat on its own I can deal with however most of the time it's used as a prefix for an insulting term. Fat alone is factual but when used as a prefix it changes form iygwim.

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