eating to be polite?

[Nettee]

Does anyone else have a real problem saying no when offered food as it feels rude? I was having a cup of tea with someone I don't know that well today and she offered me a piece of chocolate cake. I wasn't hungry, I don't like chocolate cake that much, I was trying to save up syns for crackling on a roast later but I couldn't just say no thank you as I felt it would be rude. so I ate a big piece of chocolate cake . nearly everyone else in the room then turned her down so it was just me, the children and one other. I was forced into a fairy cake on Saturday by someone who said I needed it for breast feeding despite me saying I wasn't going to.

Why can't I just say no thank you???? Anyone else got past this?

 

[lardylady]

If you find it difficult to say no, say you have an allergy to whatever is on offer.Ultimately, though, you need to practise refusing food if you don't want it. At the end of every half term at work, the staff do a bring and share buffet at the school where I teach. They always bring in very high syn foods, so I just say that I won't join them, and then I just eat my packed lunch. They all know I'm following SW and keep on trying to tempt me, but I don't really care if people think I'm being anti -social or rude: it's my body so I have the right to decide what I eat!

 

[Rochelle1]

No I just explain I'm on slimming world and would rather not.

Lardylady that's awful that they try to tempt you. My work mates are brill and encourage me

 

[Chubbylass]

I just say 'sorry, I don't like cakes, sweets etc' and that usually works!

 

[Jenna88]

I tend to just say I'm not hungry or maybe later. Maybe later usually does the trick as they're satisfied that I'll have something in a bit...they tend to forget after while

In the end, as lardylady says...your body, your choice. Don't let anyone make you feel like you have to do something. No one HAS to do anything, there's always a choice.

 

[Emmamb]

My in laws don't even offer anymore-if they have cheesecake etc they often come through with a piece each,someone will comment 'didn't you offer Emma any?' to which they look at me and I shake my head and they say 'I knew she wouldn't want any'.
They know how hard I've worked to get where I am x
Don't be ashamed to say no and that your following slimming world xx

 

[phaeona]

My parents inlaws work colleagues are all fan they simply don't offer me anything I shouldn't have. They all know I'm doing SW and are fantastic support. But I did take time to tell them what I was doing and why so now they feel they are helping and every pound I lose they know they have helped.

 

[Minimunchkins]

I didn't need to 'get past it' because I wasn't going to let anyone scupper my losses. That said, if I wanted something on offer I would accept but ask for a very small serving or just not eat it all.

It's not impolite to decline something - it's impolite to spit, swear or slag off your host.

And what's this total rot about needing a fairy cake because of breast feeding. I've heard some drivel in my time but come on!!! Whether you were/are or not breast feeding is irrelevant, a growing foetus needs nutrition not sugar & fat based empty calories. Don't let anyone drag you into the old wives addage of eating for two - that's a total load of rubbish so don't let anyone bully you into eating anything you don't want or need.

 

[rachaeld82]

I just say 'no thank you'. I don't think its rude to turn it down - you shouldn't feel forced into eating something you don't want!

 

[stivesliz]

What a great thread! I am big enough to take it on the chin and just say 'no thanks, I'm trying to be really good this week' but most people that know me dont offer as they know I wont have it.
The downside is though, the one day you say yes there will be some smart arse that will pipe up ''I thought you were on a diet''! A good example - I play in a quiz league and every week there is a small buffet brought out and 80% of the time I just get another diet coke and avoid it but the once or twice that I have indulged someone will always say ''oh are you not doing slimming world anymore'' so its easier to resist x

 

[jamjar15]

One of the children I look after LOVES making fairy cakes and is always offering me one....most of the time I'll say no thanks, I'm being good....but then I start to feel awful and say oh go on then!! What I should say really is that I'll take one home with me for later and then give it to my OH or son, but think I'd probably still feel bad doing that, she wants to see me eat it and tell her how amazing it is....and they are pretty good, yum

 

[tallsarah]

I used to feel rude refusing stuff, and sometimes used that as an excuse, now my attitude is that I am on a particular diet and that should be respected. If I was vegetarian and said no to a meat dish offered, it would be perfectly acceptable to say no thank you and rude to be pressured into accepting the food. SW is my lifestyle now and so its Ok for me to refuse and I don't feel guilty.

 

[Legomom]

I'm fine with it most of the time. But my MIL is stupidly competitive (? Not the right word but I can't quite explain how she is lol) and SHE won't eat one unless I do so she gets really really pushy with cakes etc and I have to get quite sharp with her....... which I hate!! I detest confrontation and to be forced into one over a stupid slice of cake drives me mad!! Stupid woman. Married 9 yrs and I'm still having to give her a regular little metaphorical slap down!!!

 

[Nettee]

THanks for all your replies. I know at a conscious level that no one really cares what I do and don't eat but am still suprised when I do manage to say no how easy it actually is. Will just have to keep practicing. My husband always says no to sweet things as he doesn't like them - it is not that hard!

 

[AnnaFaraday]

"Sorry, I am not allowed to eat xxxx or xxxx - doctor's orders"

 

[ScarlettStar86]

There was a bit in this months mag saying that you should always say "no thanks I don't want that" rather than "I can't have that". This puts you in control of what you eat and not the other way round. If you always say "no I can't have that" you will automatically be making yourself feel deprived. Saying that you don't want it puts you in control and the reason you don't want it is because you don't want a gain.