Everyday's a SW day :) x

thanks lovely :) reckon i should change the title of this diary! lol aww if i'm honest, right now, i just want to eat junk...minus the guilt, feeling physically naff after it and of course, the expanding waist - but know that i can't! i also spent a fortune which is silly! i didn't really want to be back on plan yesterday! (that's real honesty for you hehe) and mentally, i kind of resented it, but i stuck with it and a bit the same today. what are we like sometimes eh! hope you're doing really well :D x


I understand how you feel 100% I often binge and then come back and resent having to come back. I don't ever want my binge to end! It's a funk you are in at the moment, get over the funk, take as long as it needs, when is weigh in? Weigh in, take the hit (if there is one) and be empowered by it. Start again. It doesn't matter how many times we start again.....as long as we do.

It's something so satisfying about eating naughty stuff, it's like a drug, once you start it, you are hooked and it's so easy to let yourself stay that way and SO f-ing difficult to come out of it.

Are things ok at home? Only I remember a little while ago you were struggling with home stuff and you wobbled then about what diet to do, do you find emotional things set you off? Lack of control over one thing leads to loosing control on other things (in our case, food). That's me.

You will come out of it hun, just give yourself time lovey xxxxxxxxx
 
I understand how you feel 100% I often binge and then come back and resent having to come back. I don't ever want my binge to end! It's a funk you are in at the moment, get over the funk, take as long as it needs, when is weigh in? Weigh in, take the hit (if there is one) and be empowered by it. Start again. It doesn't matter how many times we start again.....as long as we do.

It's something so satisfying about eating naughty stuff, it's like a drug, once you start it, you are hooked and it's so easy to let yourself stay that way and SO f-ing difficult to come out of it.

Are things ok at home? Only I remember a little while ago you were struggling with home stuff and you wobbled then about what diet to do, do you find emotional things set you off? Lack of control over one thing leads to loosing control on other things (in our case, food). That's me.

You will come out of it hun, just give yourself time lovey xxxxxxxxx

aww thank you Charley...really thanks!

never noticed that i'd eat emotionally...but recently i think it's been a "company" thing?
been spending lots more time on my own this year compared to when i first started the plan, so sometimes, if i'm not in the right frame of mind, it's like it doesn't matter cos i'll have something yummy to fill the void, and then of course, the guilt appears straight away!

i'd say that's prob what was making me sway a bit towards cc before - cos i couldn't be bothered with all the "hassle" of cooking sw style for myself, but a week of being hungry soon sorted that! lol.

things at home are "ok". better than a couple of weeks ago but i feel i'm a bit on edge sometimes with a few things.

last week, my OH was off work and i think that had a lot to do with me being off the rails. this week, i'm off but haven't been out the door really cos i know i might just take myself for lunch and eat in secret (which i've NEVER done!!) and that's why i haven't.

that, of course, is a good thing....but the fact i'm borderline doing that isn't great! (i suppose the realisation of it is a good thing tho?)

another day ok which is always a bonus. i usually weigh on a monday morning so i'll just hang off til then.

it's so bloody hard at times isn't it...something has def made me change my way of thinking and some days feel like such a battle not to go major awol but for now, i'm taking each day at a time.

i'm kinda glad that a few days of junk make me feel the way i do otherwise it would be even worse! when i've eaten badly for a bit, i feel like sh1t physically and was convinced i'd grown an extra chin by sunday :giggle:

god knows what goes on in our heads sometimes...it's not healthy at times, but i know on here, most people can relate to the good AND the bad times ;) x
 
aww thank you Charley...really thanks! never noticed that i'd eat emotionally...but recently i think it's been a "company" thing? been spending lots more time on my own this year compared to when i first started the plan, so sometimes, if i'm not in the right frame of mind, it's like it doesn't matter cos i'll have something yummy to fill the void, and then of course, the guilt appears straight away! i'd say that's prob what was making me sway a bit towards cc before - cos i couldn't be bothered with all the "hassle" of cooking sw style for myself, but a week of being hungry soon sorted that! lol. things at home are "ok". better than a couple of weeks ago but i feel i'm a bit on edge sometimes with a few things. last week, my OH was off work and i think that had a lot to do with me being off the rails. this week, i'm off but haven't been out the door really cos i know i might just take myself for lunch and eat in secret (which i've NEVER done!!) and that's why i haven't. that, of course, is a good thing....but the fact i'm borderline doing that isn't great! (i suppose the realisation of it is a good thing tho?) another day ok which is always a bonus. i usually weigh on a monday morning so i'll just hang off til then. it's so bloody hard at times isn't it...something has def made me change my way of thinking and some days feel like such a battle not to go major awol but for now, i'm taking each day at a time. i'm kinda glad that a few days of junk make me feel the way i do otherwise it would be even worse! when i've eaten badly for a bit, i feel like sh1t physically and was convinced i'd grown an extra chin by sunday :giggle: god knows what goes on in our heads sometimes...it's not healthy at times, but i know on here, most people can relate to the good AND the bad times ;) x

Aw hun, I am sorry you are struggling with things, really I am. I hate feeling out of control with life and love and food - those three things are very much connected aren't they?

It is good that you are aware of what you are eating and more importantly what you are thinking about eating. You may not like denying yourself right now, but you will thank yourself in the long run that you stopped when you did.

It does amaze me tho when I have a binge, how awful I feel physically afterwards, it just goes to show that you are what you eat really.

I hate the term emotional eater, and I always used to deny that was what my problem was - but I actually think I am, I eat when I am happy, when I am lonely and when I am bored...and I sneaky eat too! So yes I eat my way through emotions!!!

Just put the last few days behind you, get the dhal loaf and roulades going again and join the big fight of fat with me!! We can do this girl.

Chin up!!! Xxxxx
 
Aw hun, I am sorry you are struggling with things, really I am. I hate feeling out of control with life and love and food - those three things are very much connected aren't they?

It is good that you are aware of what you are eating and more importantly what you are thinking about eating. You may not like denying yourself right now, but you will thank yourself in the long run that you stopped when you did.

It does amaze me tho when I have a binge, how awful I feel physically afterwards, it just goes to show that you are what you eat really.

I hate the term emotional eater, and I always used to deny that was what my problem was - but I actually think I am, I eat when I am happy, when I am lonely and when I am bored...and I sneaky eat too! So yes I eat my way through emotions!!!

Just put the last few days behind you, get the dhal loaf and roulades going again and join the big fight of fat with me!! We can do this girl.

Chin up!!! Xxxxx

Awww that made me smile BIG MUCH :D

everything you said made sense...it's always easier giving out advice than taking it eh!

i don't know that i'm an emotional eater...i think i don't allow myself to be all the time but easily could be, and with that, comes feeling p'd off - at myself, the times that i don't give in (does that make sense)

sometimes when i feel like i want to go for more goodies when following plan etc, i know that it'll pass (ie, counting down the hours til it's bed time lol) but when i'm not in the right place, i feel totally deprived if i don't have them.

i think i'm more of an "all or nothing" type person so if i'm gonna be off it, i'm off it big time rather than just making the most of 1 meal but thankfully, it does take it's toll and i end up craving the good stuff.

i've had a good week, so far, with no slip ups, and that's great especially cos i could have quite easily extended the weekend's antics!

i think maybe i need to stop comparing myself to how i was last year - when i had minimal times off plan and the want to be off plan was none existent, cos it's that that's making me feel sh1tty towards myself.

no dahl loaf this week...only cos i'm not at work and it won't get used up the same....but it will resume as normal next week ;)

aaah...when will we ever be happy with ourselves eh? i mean, i really don't see the problem with wanting to eat WHATEVER we want, and lose 5lbs a week...what's so wrong with that! hehe :giggle:

off to sort myself some breakfast - thanks, again, for your posts xxx
 
DAY - EE

Breakfast:
an apple, a banana and a yog first thing
1/2 HEb oats for carrot porridge

Lunch:
BNS & falafel salad and a pineapple stick

Dinner:
savoury mince (e/l mince, gravy, onion and a can of mixed veg) with mashed potato/carrot/suede topping

HEb: 17.5g oats/hifi light

HEa: nothing yet, maybe a 20g cheddar stick later

Syns:
raisins - 1.5
gravy - 1.5
crisps - 5
mini crunchie - 4

12 in total for the day :D

saw the update on the alpen light bars no longer being a HEb...i don't have them often, but i do have a stash (thankfully) and picked some more up today so that they'll last me a wee while after they all change.

absolutely dying to try these new salted caramel hifi bars but can't get them cos i don't go to group :(
not paying ridiculous prices on ebay for them so i either need to rejoin for a week to bulk buy lol, or maybe someone could send me them if i pay through Pay-Pal???? any kind takers out there...... ;) x
 

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Hey Missy

You seem like you are getting back into the swing of things, your food yesterday looks great. I was shocked about the Alpen Light bars not being a HEB anymore, where did you hear that?

I too want to try the Salted Caramel Bars, why dont you do what I do, pop into your nearest group and say you aren't a member here but would like to buy some bars, they always say yes, you are, after all, giving them money for their wares - they aren't going to say no. Or you could say you are an online member....

What are your long weekend plans?
 
Hey Missy

You seem like you are getting back into the swing of things, your food yesterday looks great. I was shocked about the Alpen Light bars not being a HEB anymore, where did you hear that?

I too want to try the Salted Caramel Bars, why dont you do what I do, pop into your nearest group and say you aren't a member here but would like to buy some bars, they always say yes, you are, after all, giving them money for their wares - they aren't going to say no. Or you could say you are an online member....

What are your long weekend plans?

no plans for the weekend chick...sounds like you have a good one planned though ;)

i've thought about doing that with group...but i'm wary they'd try to check for me "being an online member" and i'd be mortified! lol

to be honest, i know they can be so busy that i'd probably be able to go in, armed with my book and go to the "shop" without being noticed really...but i would die off if i got caught!

been looking at times of classes, in my area or close by but they're not really do-able :(
and the thought of having to sit through the new members chat gives me big yawns lol, although i wouldn't mind a new, updated pack i suppose.

i saw the thing about the alpens on facebook initially, but there's a whole thread about them on the healthy extra's section on here. if you use them, stock up now before they're all changed over :( x
 
no plans for the weekend chick...sounds like you have a good one planned though ;) i've thought about doing that with group...but i'm wary they'd try to check for me "being an online member" and i'd be mortified! lol to be honest, i know they can be so busy that i'd probably be able to go in, armed with my book and go to the "shop" without being noticed really...but i would die off if i got caught! been looking at times of classes, in my area or close by but they're not really do-able :( and the thought of having to sit through the new members chat gives me big yawns lol, although i wouldn't mind a new, updated pack i suppose. i saw the thing about the alpens on facebook initially, but there's a whole thread about them on the healthy extra's section on here. if you use them, stock up now before they're all changed over :( x

Hmmm I see your point, the class I used to buy them from near work has stopped - in London the city specifically, no one really stays to class so there are always people milling about and I slip in relatively unnoticed, but thinking of my old class, everyone sits in a horseshoe around the cashier and the weigher!! So yeah, it's a bit embarrassing. Hmmm

I am surprised about the alpens, but honestly I wasn't a huge fan, they are really sweet and so flimsy, I used to end up squashing them up so there was some substance, plus they are pricy for what you get. I much prefer the kelloggs chewys or oaty bars, still yet to find honey stix, when I do, I will take them down!!!!!
 
Hmmm I see your point, the class I used to buy them from near work has stopped - in London the city specifically, no one really stays to class so there are always people milling about and I slip in relatively unnoticed, but thinking of my old class, everyone sits in a horseshoe around the cashier and the weigher!! So yeah, it's a bit embarrassing. Hmmm

I am surprised about the alpens, but honestly I wasn't a huge fan, they are really sweet and so flimsy, I used to end up squashing them up so there was some substance, plus they are pricy for what you get. I much prefer the kelloggs chewys or oaty bars, still yet to find honey stix, when I do, I will take them down!!!!!


lol, they are good too (HM stix) but i've read on here too that seemingly, they're not included now either! i dunno that they were ever updated officially on the website (think they were in a book tho??) but i'm gonna use what i have and then leave them i think.
such a pain...lots of people use them/alpen lights loads for handy things to grab so i reckon there sales will be right down! (although not this week as loads are going mental and buying loads of boxes to stock up!)

they are pricey but worth it if you can find them on the cheap or when they're on offer for £1 a box.

there's a sw class about 15mins from me on tomorrow morning and i'm swithering on whether to pop along for some. my only issue is if i say i'm an online member, and they can check (is that possible??) that i'd be caught out....and that's humiliating!

i don't think they're meant to sell the bars etc to anyone other than members but if it was me, i'd be thinking about the sales and obviously, i'm following plan so it's for me to eat and not sell on Ebay for 3x as much!

anyway...will wait and see what i decide. if i was to rejoin, it really would only be for the bars so that means paying a few weeks, spending money on stock then leaving again? dunno.....x
 
DAY - GREEN

Breakfast:
carrot cake porridge with raisins and banana
tangerine

Lunch:
home made carrot, lentil and onion soup with some (controversial lol) cheese and onion smash "scones"

Snack:
alpen light and popcorn

Dinner:
quorn peppered steak and noodles with a veg pouch (not my best concoction but i didn't want to have potatoes after having the smash with lunch :( )

HEb's:
35g oats
hifi light/alpen light

HEa's:
nothing yet, maybe babybel before bed?

Syns:
raisins - 1
popcorn - 2.5
crisps - 5.5
mini bunny - 3

12 in total for the day
 

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hey all :)

eurgh! what a day! got up first thing to pop to a group to get some hifi bars. tried the new salted caramel ones...they're lovely. really sweet and gooey - such a shame we can only have 1 as a HEb lol.

i really fancied a sausage and egg mcmuffin sooooo....rather than go to mcdonald's i decided i was gonna do a healthier version, get some wm muffins and tweak it as a HEB.
spent about an hour driving round supermarkets but couldn't get any...that and the fact it was then past 10:30am, was, i thought, a sign that i was to be good and not get them! lol

came home and decided to do my on on a wm roll...wasn't the same but it did the job.

so it was all going great until my OH made fruit toast...i LOVE that stuff and usually take myself out the room when he has it...but today i just couldn't resist :(
had that AND a cream egg!! would've been as well just getting the bloody mcmuffin to start with i think! lol

DAY - EE

Breakfast:
salted caramel hifi bar and a skinny cappuccino

Lunch:
sausage and egg roll

Snack:
fruit toast and a cream egg

Dinner:
cod fillet, chips and peas

HEb:
wm roll

HEa: milk

Syns...too bloody many :(
reckon i'm on about 20 so far (10 ish for the toast, ketchup on my roll and 9 for the egg?)

i have saved some all week so probably covered over the weekly allowance....but i'm annoyed at myself cos i spent the whole morning trying and going out my way to be good and make better choices...FAIL!!!
just realised there isn't a bit of superfree in my food today! maybe i could have a fruit salad in a bit?

dunno what else i'll end up having later...we usually have a wee goody when we settle for the tele once little one's in bed so i will prob end up more over (could have a mini bunny and popcorn which would be 5.5)

hope everyone has had a fab day...weather's been great so hoping it keeps up :D x
 

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your food looks delicious, love that you took photos. subscribing :)
 
Hi MissK

I'm just popping by to say hello. I love the way you set your diary entries out, you eat some nice stuff :-D
 
Hey hun just catching up! Well done on going to group to get some bars, I might actually try that myself as those rocky road ones are to die for!

Your food has looked great this week, don't beat yourself up about the slip today. Remember its Easter weekend and if you weren't on plan you'd have already eaten loads of eggs probably (if you're like me!!) so in the scheme of things one little cream egg for 180 cals (I think) isn't going to hurt.

Hope you enjoy the rest of your Easter weekend xxx
 
your food looks delicious, love that you took photos. subscribing :)

Hi MissK

I'm just popping by to say hello. I love the way you set your diary entries out, you eat some nice stuff :-D

Hello you two...and thank you :) x

Hey hun just catching up! Well done on going to group to get some bars, I might actually try that myself as those rocky road ones are to die for!

Your food has looked great this week, don't beat yourself up about the slip today. Remember its Easter weekend and if you weren't on plan you'd have already eaten loads of eggs probably (if you're like me!!) so in the scheme of things one little cream egg for 180 cals (I think) isn't going to hurt.

Hope you enjoy the rest of your Easter weekend xxx

Thanks missy :D
i misbehaved some more...eeeek! lol

well, today i have been out AALLLLL day....and i have eaten out AAALLLL day!

went out first thing, had breakfast out and then had a subway at lunch! no, not a subway salad like usual...a proper subway! been ages since i had one and i proper enjoyed it. shame the young lad who made it up clearly wasn't ar$ed about presentation and just fired everything on and blobbed the sauce into one pile - grrr lol

i had a 6" with chicken breast, lettuce, tomato, cucumber, onions and peppers and sweet onion dressing - it was lovely

THEN...my OH suggested a wee date night, so we went to a wee italian place (it's the place we went together for our 1st proper date)
shared bruschetta then i had pasta...did i have a lower calorie, sw friendly tomatoey based sauce dish...GOD NO! i went for a carbonara!
a full fat, calorie and cream laden plate of deliciousness....and enjoyed EVERY mouthful of it

thought we'd "be good" and not have a dessert....great huh...YEAH! until we picked praline and cream Hagen Dazs ice cream up on the way back :drool:

god almighty....don't do things by half eh!

feeling pretty bloated (not surprised!) but have really enjoyed my day :D

but it's only 9 weeks until my holiday so really, i need to start behaving myself 7 days a week like i used to and not 4 or 5 which is what's been happening recently.

at least there's been some superfree consumed today - gotta try get me some "brownie points" somehow eh!

only good thing is i haven't had to wash a single dish today cos i've not eaten at home at all..every cloud and all that eh ;) lol

hope everyone's having a fab weekend...and resisting badness a bit...a big bit more than me!
:devilangel:
 
Happy easter peeps :D

decided to have a wee nosey at inst-a-gram for inspiration on meals etc.
got myself an acc so for anyone who's on it, i'm missk_sw

not got a clue what i'm doing yet...but i'll get there :D x
 
oh. my. god!

i've just discovered that the tesco BNS & falafel salad that "is syn free" and that i travelled 30 mins to get to a tesco store that had them to buy some today...is 6 syns!
6 bloody syns!!!!!!!!!

i'm gutted, i can NOT believe it!

someone pulllleeeeeze tell me it's not true! :( x
 
oh. my. god!

i've just discovered that the tesco BNS & falafel salad that "is syn free" and that i travelled 30 mins to get to a tesco store that had them to buy some today...is 6 syns!
6 bloody syns!!!!!!!!!

i'm gutted, i can NOT believe it!

someone pulllleeeeeze tell me it's not true! :( x

Don`t know if you have been told yet - Tesco Falafel and bns salad with yogurt dressing is 6 syns. - 100g is 2.5.
So sorry It could not be different.

If I had not looked it up I would have said free because I am sure it was.
 
Don`t know if you have been told yet - Tesco Falafel and bns salad with yogurt dressing is 6 syns. - 100g is 2.5.
So sorry It could not be different.

If I had not looked it up I would have said free because I am sure it was.

yeah, i'd posted cos i am soooo disappointed!

they used to be 2 syns then they were syn free...i eat them as free and only checked yesterday cos i noticed the calories on them had changed.

i'm gutted and finding it hard to see why it was free then jumped to 6 syns.

wish i hadn't bothered asking lol

hope you are well x
 
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