And no break?!
cheekychinchilla said:Being caught out is rough
I feel so crap! But need to go out to shops before they shut so no idea when I'll get to eat!
I feel a bit guilty, but it was either cake or a LOT of alcohol. So thought the cake was slightly more sensible...
Why don't you get a break? I caved in last night and brought a cupcake and a scone each for me and Mum from work - lovely clients made us stuff. Usually it doesn't really bother me and I can easily pass them up, but I had such a rough weekend at work that I just couldn't say no
Hope you're ok and managed to get something decent to eat.xx
unlike the other dude who basically told me it was all my own fault . So I feel a lot better after having my appointment today. I was in there for about an hour and a half! Will be seeing her again next Monday. but it was like 10 mins of ski jumping and hitting footballs off my head lol so dunno if it counts. My legs are aching though!
! I didn't think those things would register my weight (usual max weight for things like that is 18st, or that's what I always assume).
Where do you work, if you don't mind me asking?
When I do a half day (4hrs) I get a 15min break! Evil people not giving you a break
Yeah, I think the cake was a better choice than the alcohol. Probably way more syns but I still think a better choice
That's really good about your therapy lady. She sounds brilliant! Medication is scary and it took me a very long time to agree to go on it. The first few weeks are a bit hell-ish, but once they've settled in they really can help
The first time I saw a counselor he accused me of making everything up just so I wouldn't have to work :sigh: But since then I've had two lovely lady counselor's. I saw a Dr at my practice a while a go, I was new and trying to find a Dr there for me, who was supposedly the practices mental health expert. He also accused me of making everything up and if I didn't change my ways no one would ever give me a job :sign0163: Needles to say, I never went back to see him and have found 2 lovely Dr's there I can actually talk to and get help from. How some people get the jobs they do I will never know!!
Btw anxiety sucks big time and depression is vile. But good on you for getting help and not suffering alone. Takes a lot of courage that
And yay for the Wii not telling you you were fat. It's a sarcastic b*gger that thing isn't it?! lol
health anxiety is *****.
I pm'd you about my work lol. Not mentioning it here for all to see lol.
She is lovely, very normal and understanding. I am not keen on the idea of medication even after reading about the drug she wants to use (duloxetine?). I was on fluoxetine (if that's how you spell it) when I was younger and I hated it. The dr always said it was because I didn't give it a chance, but I felt really empty on it, only lasted 3 months or so before I stopped taking it. It took me about 6 months after stopping for the emptiness to go away. Or maybe that was all in my head because I'd read all the side effects
Your first counselor sounds like a douche. I'm glad to hear you've found a better doctor! The sick thing is that people do make stuff up, which is probably why there are so many asshole doctors.
Thanks hun. It does take courage especially when you've been ignored in the past by asshole docs!!
Since my appointment yesterday I have actually felt quite chirpy. I felt awful for most of the morning but perked up after the purchase of the Wii lol. I've only used the Wii Fit once but have heard from people that it's sarcastic lol. The personality of it reminds me of the brain training guy, if you've ever played that game. I was just chuffed it didn't tell me I was too fat to play lol!
I jumped on the scales this morning out of curiosity.. 19st 3.5lbs, so what's that like 4.5lbs off? CHUFFED! Obviously it's not official til WI tomorrow and could change, but glad the scales are moving in the right direction
But next year is going to be amazing, so maybe that will be the right time ) is a sarcastic bugger. Makes me chuckle tho! I haven't been on that in months! I go through phases of exercising, can never keep it up consistently
I know that I will get every side effect possible, that's just how my brain works these days, so I don't want to try any. I have pretty much accepted that I will have anxiety & depression for the rest of my life, and I don't want to be medicated for the rest of my life then had dinner which is probably high in syns but I am refusing to count them because it's not like I've eaten 20 donuts or something.)
Some people just don't think about what they're doing! Good luck for WI.xx
Ah yes, the "I'll go off with stress" threat. It's awful because people who are genuinely stressed get looked down on when they have to be signed off sick because people think they're making it up. It infuriates me that people will lie about mental health issues as a way of getting out of work. Whereas I had to fight for 8 years to prove that I was genuinely suffering
Oh yeah, I'll be the way I am forever and have been 'like this' since I was around 14. The joy! I hope to eventually be able to come off meds or at least reduce the dose again. But yeah, I've realised that this is just the way I am and it's like any other illness. It's not your fault, it sucks, but you just have to learn to deal and cope the best you can
I only went back to work 2 years ago. I did some volunteering and Open University for a few years and it really boosted my confidence. Enough to start applying for jobs! Was absolutely terrifying being called up for interviews. I even interviewed at the Liverpool School of Tropical Medicine. THAT has got to be one of the most nerve wracking experiences of my life. That and my driving test lol!
Eeeek about the syns. But you'll pull it back
some people are never able to do that, which I think must make the whole thing even worse because a routine does help a lot. Tropical Medicine sounds epic!! Was it an interview to study or work? Driving tests are nerve wracking, even more so with anxiety! I don't know how I managed to not overdose on Bach's Rescue Remedy on the day of my driving test lol. usually whenever I got one I would have to resort to a plain or fruit one, because the good ones were all gone lol. I am excited for WI so I will post early tomorrow with results lol. I am taking a proper day off tomorrow. Only going to finish off one assessment, which is a personal writing thing so it's like literally no thinking involved at all, lots of "I feel that... My understanding of..... The course was valuable because... blah blah" lol! Then I am going to Wii Fit it up and maybe catch up on Once Upon A Time
And it's rubbish and the most badly written thing I have ever seen!! Just want it done, but I have absolutely no motivation or enthusiasm for it. Meh!!
set my alarms for 7, woke up at 9. Probably because I was playing Wii Sports til midnight last night lol. I always feel awful when I sleep in though, even if it is my day off I like to get stuff done early! Got a ton of washing to get through, that silly assessment thing to finish, and I realised I should probably work on my psychology notes too... so maybe TV can wait lol. so glad mine aren't until the 2nd week of December. Need all the study time I can get.
That's epic that you got to the last 3! That must've given you a lot of confidence when it came to other interviews
Having no motivation is the worst. I usually end up just winging my way through stuff if I don't care about it or if I think it's a waste of time. You should set some time aside to get it done, like 30 mins a day working on it. If your job depends on it, it must be important!!
I managed to sleep in this morning
Ah well. Off tomorrow so got plenty of time I suppose. All of my courses are finished now and it's just revision classes that are on, so I'll only be going in for the ones I need help with (maths & psychology) which are on Friday & Monday I think. So will have tomorrow and most of next week to revise! Then teaching is officially over and exams start
Anyway! Scales are saying 19st 3lbs, so 5lbs off!
And I really don't think I would have fit in there. I'm not educated to anywhere near there standards and the only other person to get thru from my group was a guy who had basically studied transport and infection of viruses and the like via mosquito's for his masters. How on earth did I stand a chance?! lol. But yeah, I got through the hideously stressful practical part - different tasks in the lab. And then did my first (and hopefully last) panel interview. Had to be interviewed by 4 people!!! Argh! lol I was incredibly pleased when I started getting decent scores for that. Takes a LOT of practice tho! Btw the golf/driving range is a really good one for arms and waist
Well did 
I was pretty upset about not getting the job. I mean, it would have been amazing to work at the world famous Liverpool School of Tropical Medicine!!! But when I thought about it, as exciting as the research would have been, looking after groups of mosquito's was not exactly the area of animal care I specialise in
The thing with my work course now is that it's a rule set by head office. It doesn't matter that I have years and years of animal care experience, or a ton of animal care and science qualifications, all new VCA's (veterinary care assistant) who come to work where I do HAVE to take this course and pass it. Tbh, it's aimed at people who have no experience and no qualifications. But, my God, it is the worst written course I have ever seen. There is bugger all information, the assignments have virtually no guidelines, and the support from tutors and mentor's is non existant. So I am SO lucky I already pretty much know what I'm doing and have my past stuff as a solid foundation. I really feel for people who do get this job who are just starting out, because they will struggle so much.
I'm only really struggling because I can't be bothered with it, it's boring and badly written, and I am a lazy f*cker if something doesn't interest me! But, sigh, it has to be done so I am trying. I did a 1/3 of an assignment yesterday. My goal is to do 2 assignments in the 2 weeks I'm off work. Hopefully start the 3rd one, but we'll see
Bloody hell, I do nothing but rant on your diary. Sorry dude!!
The Wii Fat yoga is sooo hard! And I'm sure it makes it up that you're unbalanced just to have a laugh at you
if that makes sense.
