Flexisynning

[MadameLaMinx]

Well, this is a good example Catxx - what I would do here is decide between one or the other. You can go off plan, and eat and drink what you feel like, not count the syns, and most importantly not feel guilty and just enjoy yourself. Then get back on plan right away the next day.

Alternatively, you can proactively choose to limit yourself to the flexisyns - a bottle of wine is about 26 syns, sticking to boiled rice instead of fried is free, look up the menu for the place you are going and try and get as much information as possible about the content and make wise choices around your food. You can probably get a rough idea from the syn values online or the eating out guides. Then allow yourself a good portion of flexisyns, remember this can be as many as you choose, even if its a lot, then add on the extras you save over the week, or subtract them if you are feeling particularly virtuous from the total - and stick to the flexisynning method.

Personally, I would go for the former method, because a bottle of wine or so in, you will lose count and stop caring how many syns is in anything. It is a one off.

But its up to you.

 

[laura2481]

Great post from MLM about Flexisyns. I have done both- when having a bad day I have deceided that I will have up to 30syns that day and stuck to that limit, but i have also had plenty of time where I have just gone of plan and not counted anything. I've never retrospectively said 'that was a flexisyn day'. I know I have felt more in control on days when I have had proper 'official' flexisyns.

 

[catxx]

Thank you for that. No need to look at their menu as I know it off by heart. I will have a look at the syn values of the most likely dishes we will be ordering so I have a good idea. Will only order two glasses of wine so can work that out. Will just have to try and do a guestimate!

 

[MrsBabyCakes]

Really agree with what has been said by MLM. Was just curious though as to what you think of this - Am out with friends on Saturday night to a lovely chinese restaurant. I am planning to save syns this wk (only to have 5 a day this wk) as I will be eating and drinking red wine. I have no idea how many syns I will have (just lots!) don't know what we will order (I love it all lol!) I will not be able to weigh out portions in the restaurant.
I would like to think I am kind of 'flexi synning' as I am planning in advance rather than having a night off plan?

When I do a chinese buffet 'planned' I find I can stay in my syns if I dont eat anything thats been battered or fried. I fill up on noodles and boiled rice, and all the yummy stirfrys, lots of veg and my chinese always does loads of seafood, so I go mad on prawns and mussels. So I am still kinda stuffing myself but staying in control of what I am eating to a certain extent. Maybe you could try and only have 1-2 glasses of wine rather than a bottle perhaps, and switch to diet soda afterwards. That way your having a bit of what you fancy but not losing control totally...?

 

[downsizingmycurves]

I disagree. When we flexisyn we still count the syns. When we go overboard we stop counting and choose to ignore the plan totally. There is a specific difference and personally I don't think it helps to be absolving responsibility for a binge. We need to learn and understand what triggers those events, and find ways to stop them happening where possible, and that just can't happen when there is a convenient way to just dismiss it.

If that is how you personally choose to do things, that's your choice, but by suggesting that flexisynning is something it is not, you are misleading people who are yet to take in all aspects of the plan and handing them your choice of excuse to use as theirs.

The net result of both is too many syns on any one day. From that point forward, what really matters is that the person can write it off mentally and get back on track the next day. If, by mentally deeming an overboard day as a flexi syn day an individual can get back on track to their long term goal, then that is a good thing in my book. To me, the whole joy of SW is that it isn't restrictive, it is a lifestyle choice and not a strict diet.

 

[Maximus]

Very often on the forums I see someone respond to someone who has had a blow out with something like the following...

"Ah, never mind, just flexisyn it and move on".

Now, I understand that this is supposed to make the person feel better about their binge and draw a line under it, but simply, this is NOT how Flexisynning is supposed to be used.

Flexisyns are supposed to be a way of keeping you in control of your consumption at special occasions.

They are NOT designed to be an used as an excuse to write off a bad day. If you are going to flexisyn, this needs to be planned in advance of the event or occasion and you should set yourself a maximum number of syns for that day that you will not exceed. If you get to that amount of syns, you are then supposed to switch back to free and superfree for the rest of the day.

Using flexisyns as an afterthought completely defeats the object of putting YOU in control of the plan.

It is perfectly ok to say "Ah, you had a blow out, it happens to all of us, draw a line under it and move on." It DOES happen to all of us. We do lose control from time to time, whether that be because we drank too much and thought "Ah, stuff it, tomorrow is another day, I'll order that pizza, and being as I'm out of control, may as well have the tub of ice-cream too" or because we have talked ourselves into it, convincing ourselves that it really wont matter as a one-off. Perhaps we are feeling really down and only chocolate will do, by the cupboardload.

But by default, when we head down that road, we are out of control, we lose the ability to say no to the stuff we know is not on plan.

Most importantly, there is no shame in doing so. If we feel guilty about this one-off blow out, we are far more likely to eat more rubbish through guilt and "Well, I have blown it now, I am such a loser, may as well reinforce that message by continuing to eat nonsense". This is where I suspect most of us following the plan can really lose heart and fall off plan for weeks or months.

It doesnt have to be that way, of course, we can have a blow out, a day off plan, and still have the control to get back on plan right next day. And that means, ultimately, that while we did stop off at a scenic point on route, we are still in control and heading towards our destination despite the stop.

So please, STOP suggesting that people flexisyn a blow out. They are two entirely different things and people need to start taking responsibility for their own consumption, rather than just passing it off because it doesnt matter. Of course it matters, but by passing the responsibility for the lack of self-control onto a "flexisyn" day defeats the purpose of a flexisyn day, which IS designed to keep you in control.

Be honest, if you had a blow out, say so. If someone you know had a blow out, acknowledge it, encourage them to move past it, but dont encourage them to write it off using a part of the plan that it simply doesnt apply to.

/gets off soapbox.

Very brave post Minxie - well done!

I hear the phrase at group and flexi-syn is carte blanche for a blowout - and no mnistake. Flexi-syn - over 150 syns in a session! - I don't think so either!

It is a flagrant disregard of the plan and many, many people do it.

Perhaps it is not what people want to hear, and perhaps it is to ease their conscience? - maybe even something else to blame about when they "lose control".

So to MLM a very thought-provoking post and though it may ruffle a few feathers, it has certainly help put a few myths to bed - once and for all!

Steve

 

[Stepout]

Totally agree with mlm
The idea of flexi synning is to learn to have some control over what you are eating

As in the Chinese meal if you were flexi synning it you would choose to have boiled rice for example and look at what you could have that you would still enjoy but would be lowest in syns and count everything
If you weren't flexi synning you would just go along and have whatever you felt like and have no idea how many syns you had
I think you feel much better about things if you can flexi syn properly
If you just have a blowout you'll feel disappointed in yourself anyway whatever you choose to call it

 

[MadameLaMinx]

The net result of both is too many syns on any one day. From that point forward, what really matters is that the person can write it off mentally and get back on track the next day. If, by mentally deeming an overboard day as a flexi syn day an individual can get back on track to their long term goal, then that is a good thing in my book. To me, the whole joy of SW is that it isn't restrictive, it is a lifestyle choice and not a strict diet.

Again, I have to disagree here. The net result is EITHER, an enjoyable day/evening where you still remain in control and ON plan, and can move on in a positive frame of mind, OR the consumption of numerous syns, often lost total track of, and the feeling of guilt and disappointment in oneself that invariably follows. They are not one and the same thing by ANY stretch of the imagination and if they were, the plan would clearly state "Hey, why not, if you feel like it, spend an evening feeling down and depressed eating anything you can put a hand to and dont worry about the consequences!"

It doesnt. And it is lying to yourself to pretend otherwise.

I think we will have to agree to disagree here, because you have your way of doing things and Slimming World have theirs.

 

[Dickiechicklet]

I think this has been a really interesting thread to read through - I echo, wholeheartedly, MLM's comments!!

While it is important that we embrace SW as a lifestyle and a plan rather than view it as a stuffy and rigid diet I think it is important to remember that the are some caveats to some of the rules we (I) appreciate so much but which can be easily forgotten. This applies directly to how we interpret parts of the plan such as flexi syns but particularly the message of free food that the plan promotes - in the not so small print our books do say that we should enjoy free foods until we are full. Just because a food is free we shouldn't eat beyond our fill.

Sorry to digress somewhat but I think that we (I!!) can easily start to blame the plan when we don't get the results we want but that much of that can result from a selective interpretation of the plan.

I would hope fellow forum users would point out to me if I was getting things wrong - whether that was will misinterpretation or simple mistake!

DC xx

 

[downsizingmycurves]

Again, I have to disagree here. The net result is EITHER, an enjoyable day/evening where you still remain in control and ON plan, and can move on in a positive frame of mind, OR the consumption of numerous syns, often lost total track of, and the feeling of guilt and disappointment in oneself that invariably follows. They are not one and the same thing by ANY stretch of the imagination and if they were, the plan would clearly state "Hey, why not, if you feel like it, spend an evening feeling down and depressed eating anything you can put a hand to and dont worry about the consequences!"

It doesnt. And it is lying to yourself to pretend otherwise.

I think we will have to agree to disagree here, because you have your way of doing things and Slimming World have theirs.

Mmmm. Not sure why you have assumed that I don't follow the SW way of doing things.

My point is that if someone can lose the guilt and disappointment by deeming a day off as a flexi syn day then good for them. What is done is done, its how people go forward that is important. People can flexi syn and lose weight, people can have days off and still lose weight. Its the long term approach that matters not getting hung up on strict interpretations. For example, the SW blurb talks about eating as much free food as you like. If we all took that literally, we'd be huge!

 

[Amy2249]

On Saturday I was going out for a friends birthday so I had to make the choice between whether I was going to flexi syn or have a day off plan. I had used most of my syns for the week already and knew I wouldn't stick to the amount I would give myself and knew I wouldn't count so I decided a day off plan. The next day I counted the amount of syns I consumed and it was way over what I would have given myself. But I brushed myself down and went straight back on plan. Next time I may opt for flexi syn but I knew deep down that this time I would go over what I allowed myself and therefore going against the whole point of flexi syn. I agree that my binge is completely different to deciding on a flexi syn day but think its about how the truthful you are to yourself. If you are truthful and don't hide behind excuses you will easily draw a line under a binge/flexi syn and move on back on plan.
Hope that makes sense, sorry rather long!

 

[MadameLaMinx]

Makes perfect sense Amy, and is a really good example of how you stayed in control, even while dipping offplan for a day. You made the choice, you enjoyed yourself, you moved on the next day and got straight back on with it.

Awesome stuff Thats how its supposed to be!

 

[Moo85]

I think the point about this is that there are people who may not be too familiar with SW or people who dont go to group who could easily get confused with all the conflicting posts about flexi-synning. It would be easy for someone like this to post saying that they went over syns by having 2 bottles of wine and a pizza and for someone else to reply saying 'just call it a flexi day'. The first person might then think that this *binge and write it off* technique was part of SW - while I'm sure we all do it from time to time (lord knows I do) this isnt what SW recommends and it doesn't teach useful/healthier techniques at coping with difficult eating situations for the future.

I think either way, all of us on minimins would be there to offer support to someone if they had gone off plan and we'd advise them to draw a line and get back on it, but it's helpful for someone to make it clear what the differences are between flexi-syns and a day off plan. I definitely agree that the most important thing is to get rid of the guilt and support people to carry on!

 

[Stackhead]

From reading MLM's posts I think it presents a rather rigid view of SW. I am going out for a Chinese meal on Friday but I have neither looked at the menu nor plan too. I feel like I know enough about the plan to make informed choices i.e. choosing boiled rice over fried etc... without having to plan in advance.

Not only that the next day I know I will consume ALOT of alcohol. I'm not going to restrict the number of syns I have because to me that just ruins the fun of going out...'oh wait, I can't have another drink because i've reached my syn level....'

But knowing this, I can prepare for it. I can make sure that I have very low syn/free days in the week preceding it, and jump on the Wii Fit a little bit more. But even with my preparation and prior knowledge this (from my reading of your posts) would be considered a binge, rather than a flexi syn weekend.

Whilst I won't technically be recording my syn levels am I not still following the plan, by choosing to make sacrifices in the week preceding my 'binge'? I look at SW as a guiding force, teaching you to make choices - knowing that if your going to go a little off track at some point you have to make it up at another - rather than forcing you to plan every little misdemeanour - or if you don't making you feel bad about your lack of planning or lack of control.

Whilst the term 'flexi-syn' might strictly mean what MLM implies, in reality it's all about making sure that we make the choice to stay with the plan and knowing that one little 'binge' won't affect us that much. It's a mental tool for me.

 

[MadameLaMinx]

I am not "implying" anything. I am pointing out that the Slimming World Plan includes an aspect of it which allows you to enjoy a social occasion or special event where you might otherwise eat and drink to excess with an element of control that does, yes, involve some forward planning on your part in that you are expected to identify a set number of syns, however many that may be, within your expectation of what that event is likely to involve, and stick with that as a limit of syn consumption for the event. This practice is clearly defined as "flexisynning" in SW literature and there is no other definition that could possibly be substituted for this definition because it is the only one that exists.

It is not by definition "saving syns in a sufficient amount to partly / cover an expected upcoming event" - yes, often people do that, some consultants think this is ok, others advise against it. How you use your normal syn allowance on a daily/weekly basis is up to the individual. If however you use up your whole syn allowance for that day / week - any further syn consumption becomes an excess of your syns and can lead to falling off plan altogether. Not that it WILL, but SW want you to have every chance to succeed using their plan - which is far less rigid than many plans but does have to have some sort of rules and guidelines, or people just wouldn't lose any weight, which is after all what they are paying for.


If you want to do that, and understand the plan with your own interpretation of it, then who am I or Slimming World to stop you altering the plan to suit yourself. If you still get losses, great, good for you. But whatever spin you want to put on it, what you are doing is not Flexisynning and it is, as others have pointed out, giving very mixed messages, which is not at all helpful.

 

[Starlight]

I have to admit flexi syns were something I just couldnt get my head round when I tried SW. I was used to WW saving points for a night out etc and it seemed the way it was explained and portrayed here a lot was really just like 'Youre going out, have what you want, call it flexisyns and its ok'

I queried it several times but still couldnt work out how this could be a good way of working a diet at all.

I wish this post had been around then, it makes SO much sense

 

[Maximus]

I must admit I don't understand flexi-syns.

Well, I do, I just don't understand the point or reason behind them.

Well done to Amy for just having a night off plan. Then again I've never understand people saving 7x15 syns for 105 syns of wine on a Saturday night. - mainly because I never believe it because those syns have only been used for wine! - the other syns, bread, a bit of chocolate, the odd biscuits, right down to the spread on the sandwich, the "bit of mayo" on the tuna, the "splash" of gravy etc. are not counted (trust me it happens).

The reason I choose to mention this is because a lot of people wonder why they are not losing, or worse gaining more weeks than they lose etc. and it is clear why! - in group people often add as a comic aside that it may have been the gateau, or the bottle of Smirnoff, or the tub of Ben & Jerrys - almost as an afterthought.

I'm sure every group has witnessed the above and is usually accompanied by laughter - it happens, it is human nature.

All I think Madam La Minx was highlighting is that it should not be used to mask a pre-planned day off plan or some way to salve the conscience.

To be honest, though I am a little obsessive, admittedly, I would not even mention it, or bring it to public notice lol. I wouldn't be able to ease my guilty conscience and I'd go away and beat myself up for a week and sulk like a spoiled brat!

Right, I'm off to take a chill pill 'cos I'm taking this way too seriously

 

[MadameLaMinx]

I think if it wasnt for this forum, a lot of us would do exactly that, and fall off plan and jump back into the circle of be depressed, eat nonsense, put on weight, get more depressed, eat more nonsense.

I applaud SW for putting this valuable tool in place that allows us to leave that guilt behind and step out of the cycle of behaviour that lets us self-sabotage. I think it is a very clever and innovative psychological tool.

And I can completely understand the mentality of wanting to write bad spells off as a "flexisyn". I have considered it myself in the past, but the simple act of talking to others, confessing that I have lost control and being reassured that it is going to happen occasionally to all of us, and the important thing is not to beat ourselves up, but to get right back on with the plan is enough to get me personally to do exactly that.

I consider myself very fortunate in that regard, I HAVE learnt that I can fall off plan, for example, there is at least one day a month where I really lose the plot emotionally, its like a massive peak of hormones in my system and I am emotionally ragged, have no ability to be tolerant, am raging at myself inside and will blindly stuff chocolate and carbs down my throat at a rate faster than I can reasonably cope with.

At the time, I just DONT CARE. Stuff SW, STUFF the world, I am raging inside and I have to keep control of that emotional feeling because I have other people to consider that I live with and who would be upset if I started exhibiting the feelings I am experiencing. So I cant, so I end up raging through the cupboards instead.

It doesnt happen every month, but when it does, its pretty bad. However, the change in me now, means that I can wake up the next day, draw a line under it, and get straight back on with the plan and I have yet to see a gain as a result. But I cannot write it off as a flexisyn day because it isnt one.

Knowing that people understand, knowing that people care, that they are willing you on to succeed, and want to help you get to your goal, is so valuable. You do not need to hijack a specific SW term in order to achieve the ability to break that cycle of eating = guilt. You just need to come here and talk about it, draw that line and move on from it.

I am really glad that so many people have been helped by this thread and I know it hasnt sat too well with some, but I can tell by the response that it has helped a great deal to clarify and make things more understandable. And basically, thats what we are all here for, to support and help one another to get to where we want to be.

I hope I havent upset or offended anyone that has participated. That was never my intention. I just wanted to make sure that the message was clear and that people get the right message from all of us.

Going off plan - is ok.

Using the flexisyn aspect to stay on plan and enjoy a special occasion, thats ok too.

But getting to where you want to be - thats the best thing in the world, however long it takes you to get there and by whatever route you choose.

 

[Maximus]

Well I put on 0.5lb tonight

Please disregard everything i've said on the subject as I'm officially an eejit

I'm going to stick to body magic and leave the controversy to others lol.

 

[downsizingmycurves]

Well I put on 0.5lb tonight

Please disregard everything i've said on the subject as I'm officially an eejit

I'm going to stick to body magic and leave the controversy to others lol.

Ah a bit of controversy is good for the soul.

Your stats look fab over all those weeks. The half can soon disappear again.