Food without the angst - Vegan SW

Lots and lots of mushrooms and butter beans in various combinations, bananas and nectarines
 
Today: Melon, ryvitas, lentil and cauliflower curry with alpro coconut milk, coffee with hazelnut, 3 mini marshallows, red pepper and chickpea and cucumber soup
 
Last night I had more of the lentil and cauliflower curry with rice and was so tired after a full on day I didn't feel safe to drive. Plus hazelnut milk in coffee, oh yum. So WI will happen at the consultant's other group tonight. After another full on day ... ho hum

Edit, oh yes, and two slices of rye and sunflower seed loaf.
 
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Hey Micci,

so glad to hear from you! Very very sorry to hear about your mum, and also your mother-in-law, it throws us into such turmoil and we end up having to focus on things that are anything but conducive to grieving and coping, e.g. lots of paperwork, dealing with other people's grief etc etc.

I genuinely hope that you can catch a bit of a break soon, I know every situation is very different but when I lost my dad I was so caught up in looking after everyone else, it's taken four years for me to actually start facing all those feelings and over the last few months they have surfaced and I'm going through a rollercoaster of depression/light at the end of the tunnel at the moment. But although it's unsettling, it's honest and real and I hope you can have a bit of time to look after yourself and think of yourself as well, not just others.

It sounds like you have found your footing again with the food and your menu always sounds very good :)

Yesterday I was tired and muddled, and can't remember what I ate. I know there were some less than good choices but that I wasn't eating like a mad thing. WI tomorrow, I promised myself I'd go for three pounds this week. Don't now how I have done but the jeans that had become uncomfortably tight are now comfortable, even straight after a wash so I feel heartened.

One small NSV for me has been losing my addiction to the scales, at one time I'd be on and off several times a day. Now, they don't have a battery in them and I'm unsure of how well they work and I really not at all bothered. Very liberating.

Breakfast: 1 pink grapefruit

I hope you get the loss you're aiming for. I always find after a time away from any form of structured healthy eating I feel really .... dirty and clogged up. And it reflects so much in what I'm like in myself and also in how I deal with other people. It always takes a few days to get back into the mindset but once I'm in it, I feel cleaner again. Probably because I know that I'm doing something good for myself and that translates in doing good and being good for others too.

It's really good that you have managed to stay away from the scales, it can domineer and control your thoughts so much and it's so unhealthy. I hope you have a good week. :)
 
Thank you for dropping by :) You're so right about the admin and other people's needs. My son has all sorts of difficulties and has (yet again!) stopped going to school, and yet he needs to be preparing himself for college. next September ...in theory GCSEs and similar right now need to be addressed. DH and I were at the school about this today, came back feeling hopeful that the situation is salvageable but like so many plans with m'boy reality hits once home again and he gets stressed and frozen.

At the same time my brother a hundred miles away is falling apart, living in the flat he shared with my mother and on zero income as he hasn't managed to sidn on for any benefts and is far far from being able to work for physical and MH reasons. Oh flippety :( And my husband is still not well after a possible stroke and a definite pulmonary embolism last year so he supports the boy whilst I pop off to my brother now and then .... flippety flippety as I said. We need to sell the flat as he can't afford to live there, he needs MH support, and his other medical problems looking at. Fortunately he has been accepted by an advocacy service and as soon as one of their advocates has space in their case load they will take him on. When this will be I do not know. All this worry plus my own grieving had me necking biscuits and chocolate and crisps like there was a famine on the horizon. But, like I said, something seems to have shifted in my thinking. I used to think about m'boy and then an irresistible urge for sweet stuff would hit pretty soon. But now this is much less so. But this has happened before, hopefully it will last better this time. I'll think of previous stronger times as practice and this is for real.

I've been spending time putting my nice but too small for me clothes in vacuum storage bags and having happy memories of when those tiny looking clothes were getting too loose, knowing that those days will return. Note, John Lewis and Wilko bags work, Pound shops and Home Bargains ones are rubbish.

Definitely a WI tonight, after a doctor's visit with m'boy. Yawn, I am so flipping tired. But I have good things planned - three, yes THREE concerts. One on Friday with m'boy, then one on Monday (or is it Tuesday?) with a friend and then on Wednesday; this one on my own. DH is taking m'boy to an interview at college.It's not a course he wants but he can treat it as practise. Phew, dh is being supportive, I thought I'd have to cancel the concert because of this interview.

You have been sticking at this SW regime so steadfastly, masses of respect is due to you!
 
Oh poop. Only one pound off. Still, it is another pound in the right direction. Perhaps my body is changing, I used to lose more than this. Or perhaps it's that I'm forgetting about overdoing it when I'm tired. I had a flashback to two bowls of rice with hazelnut milk and lots of squirts of that squirty hot chocolate sauce stuff. I did think it was on plan at the time, but neither the chocolate nor the milk was measured, Lots of late night carby snacks did hinder my losses before so if I've had more than one night like that and forgotten them that would explain it.

Anyway, I'm preparing for tired evening now by having something prepared, keeping a more meticulous diary and perhaps doing a more varied diet. Perhaps doing a strict SP for a couple of days, then a green day with lots of carby goodies and perhaps some days of speedy soup. Gosh, I'm so tired that I can't remember all of today - it's been stressful again. I remember a fair bit of soup made from butterbeans, pickled red pepper and cucumber again, minus the almond milk. since coming back from group I've had a very careful 4 biscuits that add up to 10 sysn -ah bother, I forgot the half eaten pack of crisps but that should just bring me up to 15 syns today.

There's a saucepan full of a spicy mix of butter beans, tomatoes and cauliflower. I'll have that and go to bed.
 
I am soooooo tired, slept badly last night and T is stressed and unable to get in to school. Yet again. all I want to do is curl up and snooze, instead I'm having a breather online and getting back into being patient reasonable supportive mum mode.

Breakfast: 3 free Linda Mc sausages and some s/f cream soda. Darn, I hope I have a decent loss this week. I'm writing everything I eat here and will transform it into a written diary for the group next week.
 
2 biscuits (3 syns) 1 banana
 
Lunch: Homemade houmous (large pickled pepper, onion salt, lemon juice, can of chick peas) salad of grated apple and carrot, 4 x ryvitas
 
And then we went out - 2 mugs of soya latte, goodness knows how much soya milk and loads of sugar as it was so bitter. No more synning for me today! It was a nice cafe in the park and good to get me and the boy out.
 
Last entry of the day, tasters of other people's rice and chilli beans - free foods. A large bowl of sooup made from green beans and butter beans. I want more than 1 lb off next week!
 
Thursday 26.03.2015

Breakfast: 3 x Linda Mc sausages (free) half a tin of chopped tomatoes (S)

Lunch: Green beans, scrambled tofu, ryvitas

Snack: giant couscous with red peppers and carrots, 1/2 a Sainsbury's falafel. I couldn't find the exact ones on the data base but all their other falafels are 1.5 syns each so I'll call it 1 syn. I'm aiming for at least 2 days of negligible syns to make up for my sugary lattes yesterday.

Dinner. Goodness knows how to syn this! Half a melon, easy peasy, that was an S. Also, I had made a casserole for the family with Lind McC sausages, the syned ones, loads of veggies inc sweet potato, green beans and peas all in a sauce made of some rather special up market mustard with chilli and orange and tomato puree. I had some of the veggies with a minimal amount of the sauce on them. Ho hum, all I can say is it can't have been very heavy on the syns. Then, one small banana and a large coffee with the rest of my *measured* hazelnut milk - well, actually I've 100 m left, enough for a small coffee. And then, this seems to have been more of a green day than anything else, I culd have another A and a B, but I don't need them, will be heading of for some Zzzzzs in a while.

Late night snack - 1 tin of chilli beans. Free
 
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Friday 27.03.2015

Breakfast: Half a melon
Lunch: Ful medames (p) with broccoli (s), peas (p) peppers (s) and pasta
Snack: 2 x HXB cereal and a bit of soya milk .... POSSIBLY A BIT MORE THAN X HXBS ... these things happen ...
Supper: Spinach and haricot beans with orzo pasta. Tangerines

It's not been a good day here but there is an untouched packet of biscuits in the kitchen sweet sticky chocolate pudding in the fridge and it really honestly isn't shouting at me to go and eat it all.

Late night hunger struck and I was unprepared - 15-20 syns worth of asda malted wheaties.
 
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Today's food - compensating for yesterday. Green beans and lentils, then some more green beans and lentils. Tangerines. Almond milk in coffee.

Evening. Soup made of chickpeas, pickled red pepper, tomatoes, and koko milk with some Philippine spice mix
 
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No stupid extra eating after finishing my entry here last night. WI tomorrow, tbh I'm expecting a gain and need to get my head round accepting that. I hate seeing the numbers moving in the wrong direction, it can pull me off focus for a long time. So I'm waffling on about it here to accustom myself to realising and accepting that this may well happen. If it does, I shall return the following week when I will hopefully have made up for the gain.
 
Sunday 9.03.2015
I had a liquidiser full of soup made of the koko milk, chick peas, tomatoes and pickled pepper for in the breakfast and lunch, just now I've had roasted courgettes with roasted tomatoes and burgers made of tinned lentils and instant mash. Meal times feel weird with the clocks going forwards.

Dinner: Watermelon, baked beans and 2 Linda McC rosemary and red onion sausages (free)

2 x HXB's worth of porridge, 3 more sausages

Syns: 2 tspns apple and mincemeat pudding. Goodness knows how many.
 
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Monday 30.03.2015

1 punnet of frozen raspberries, a few boiled veggies, 2 small teeny teeny dark chocolate and ginger chocolate eggs - 4 syns? Note to self, get batteries for cooking scales, you silly woman.

Large quantity of grapes, chocolate avoided, .... more later ... B U T 3 1/2 lbs off. Happy dances ;)
 
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Last night I celebrated a bit too much with biccies and chocolate. So, back on the veggie soup today. I plan carrot and lentil with coriander and coconut milk. The coconut milk gives it an added extra but as you can have twice as much almond milk I'll look out for that on special offer and stock up again as soon as I can.
 
Have made the first batch of soup and despite it being a rather (very!!!!) disappointing day regarding my boy's acheivements, I am sticking very well to only having that and water to drink.
 
I stuck to my soup all day, then went out in the evening and have just got back. Supper was a large plate of roast potatoes with pepper, lemon juice and olive oil on them. Seeing as how olive oil used to be a HXB I'm jolly well counting it as though it still is. I had baked beans and 3 Linda McC free sausages and jolly nice it all was too.

Pat on the back for me, my friend was munching crisps and offering me the packet and I took ONE, yup, just ONE crisp to be sociable and stuck to sparkling water when she was on beer.

Note to self, some green veggies would be a good idea tomorrow. I'll have a drink with the rest of my A allowance then catch some Zzzzzz
 
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