Gastric band woman - my response

Dietkitty

Rebel without a calorie
Thanks to all of you who offered info yesterday.
I sent the Anne Diamond link to my friend yesterday. He emailed this morning to say he's not going to show it to his other half as he doesn't want to worry her unduly, she is determined to go ahead and he would do the worrying for her!
I'm afraid I saw red at that point. I replied asking if he was mad, did he want her to go into this uninformed and listed all the possible side effects composed from all your messages.
At the end of the email I asked if all things considered he really wanted to shoulder this worry alone.
I haven't had a reply yet.
 
Hi Dietkitty, could someone please explain how you do the worrying for someone else. You friend needs his head read, I would never allow my partner to go through anything where there was this kind of danger involved and I am sure my partner would feel exactly the same. How do you live with yourself after the poo has hit the fan knowing you could have somehow prevented it but did nothing. I know is some instances some people will not change their mind after seeing all the facts but hell man at least tell her about the issues invloved, at least then you know you tried. The guilt this man will suffer if things go wrong.

I hope I spelt everything right, I have double checked I promise
 
maybe this man wants her to have it done more than she does ! You should never jump into things without knowing what could go wrong .
Yes sometimes the op goes well overseas but there are alot more cases of neglect overseas than there are in the uk . Ive seen some horrible things that have gone wrong with ops as i looked into it when my friend had her tummy done and id rather go to uk clinic .
You cant put a price down on somebodys life !
 
He's replied and says she has trawled the internet, read all the books and knows every fact inside out and upside down. There is also a London clinic for the after care. He is now going to pass on everything I have said but says she is so determined that he doesn't think anything he could say would stop her. I've mentioned that it's not the easy option and a lifelong commitment etc as she doesn't stick to diets for more than about a week.
I just hope for all concerned that it goes well and is a success. If something should happen he will have to live with it, but I have certainly given him some good information.
As always I will be there for him if he needs me. After all that's what friends are for.
 
Absolutely Dietkitty, that is what friends are for. I am glad he has decided to tell her but it sounds like she will go through with it anyway, well I hope all goes well with her, and well done to you for trying to do the right thing.
 
I think that in some cases a gastric band may seem like the only option but ONLY and only if nothing else has wrked after you have really tried. AND you are well informed, knowthe risks etc. sounds to me like shes jumping straight in, not caring about anything else and people like that get on my nerves :)
 
Exactly Mandy. I know for a fact that she's never tried this type of diet. She may well know all the risks etc but the fact that my friend has just said she sees the band as a fix is a concern. She's also prepared for it to take a year so I can't understand why she wont try this as she'd lose what she needs to in 6 months or less. Answer - cos she lacks commitment to the cause and rarely sticks to anything in life!
Oh well time for me to keep my big fat nose out of it now.
 
Yup!
I've been so wound up by this and by work today that for this first time since starting I really fancy a glass of wine. It's this attitude that's got me into this state!
 
Argh noooo, dont let them get to u so much that u drink wine hehe. Truth is, some people just cant accept help and advice, THEY know best, but when it falls flat on its face....you can have a smug look on your face, sitting at your target weight aftr achieving your goal on this "faddy diet" with a nice glas of wine in your hand....and where will she be? lookin for her next quick fix? lol
 
I was going to have a gastric band in the UK. What people do not realise is you can end up heavier than before. Your mindset still has to change. The doc told me that people can still eat chocolate as it melts, so it does not help them. He told me many patients have ended up bigger than before because they still eat the same, but are more complacent about it.

People need therapy before and after to try and help change their mindset. Just like doing Exante, the mindset has to change for it to work.
 
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