Elvira
Mistress of the Dark
Yes, you've guessed it, I've fallen off the wagon AGAIN.
So angry with myself!!!
I know there is no excuse but it's comfort eating. Got massive problems at the moment. There is just so much pressure and I can't cope with it all!
I'm leaving my job in three weeks, moving 300 miles away in four weeks, starting uni in five weeks not to mention I am currently going through a sort of harrassment type case thing at work.
Long story. Basically a guy made advances on me, I rejected him, so he threatened to tell my OH that I had cheated on him etc. etc. and proceeded to make violent threats towards my OH and myself. The guy has been suspended and now I have been asked to provide a statement and I have to divulge all my personal things because I befriended this guy and grew quite close to him when me and my OH were going through a rocky patch although nothing ever happened between us, feelings were discussed but I decided I couldn't take it further because I love my OH. I know I was naive and I probably deserve this but it doesn't mean I can handle it any better. Luckily OH has been very understanding and it has made us stronger. It just seems that everything else is falling apart!!!
Stepped on the scales this morning and after a 4 day binge following on from being off work ill (stress induced I'd wager), I appear to have gained 11lbs putting me back into the 17st bracket. Not happy as I was heading towards the 15st bracket. I know most of it will be water retention so I am hitting the water hard today.
I have 27 days until I move to Swansea. I have set myself the target to remain 100% for those 27 days and to lose at least 1st 7lbs. That would put me at 15st 10lbs which is only 13lbs from the lowest weight I got to my first time round on CD. Hopefully I will lose more. I really need to stop using feeling ill, stress, emotional trauma etc. as an excuse to eat but I don't know how. I mean, I know how, but it's putting it into practice.
What the hell is wrong with me!?!?! :cry:
So angry with myself!!!
I know there is no excuse but it's comfort eating. Got massive problems at the moment. There is just so much pressure and I can't cope with it all!
I'm leaving my job in three weeks, moving 300 miles away in four weeks, starting uni in five weeks not to mention I am currently going through a sort of harrassment type case thing at work.
Long story. Basically a guy made advances on me, I rejected him, so he threatened to tell my OH that I had cheated on him etc. etc. and proceeded to make violent threats towards my OH and myself. The guy has been suspended and now I have been asked to provide a statement and I have to divulge all my personal things because I befriended this guy and grew quite close to him when me and my OH were going through a rocky patch although nothing ever happened between us, feelings were discussed but I decided I couldn't take it further because I love my OH. I know I was naive and I probably deserve this but it doesn't mean I can handle it any better. Luckily OH has been very understanding and it has made us stronger. It just seems that everything else is falling apart!!!
Stepped on the scales this morning and after a 4 day binge following on from being off work ill (stress induced I'd wager), I appear to have gained 11lbs putting me back into the 17st bracket. Not happy as I was heading towards the 15st bracket. I know most of it will be water retention so I am hitting the water hard today.
I have 27 days until I move to Swansea. I have set myself the target to remain 100% for those 27 days and to lose at least 1st 7lbs. That would put me at 15st 10lbs which is only 13lbs from the lowest weight I got to my first time round on CD. Hopefully I will lose more. I really need to stop using feeling ill, stress, emotional trauma etc. as an excuse to eat but I don't know how. I mean, I know how, but it's putting it into practice.
What the hell is wrong with me!?!?! :cry: