Ok confession time....
last night I was so gutted after trying so hard all week and really wanted to eat but bcos id been to the dentist I could give in to temptation.
Then I went to work this morning still in a vile mood and being so down and annoyed. It was someones bday and there was a HUGE chocolate cake, I said no thank you.
Then someone came and put a piece on my desk in front of me with a spoon..... I said take it away but they left it.... I thought no I dont want to eat it, I dont need to eat it, blah blah. Then I dont know what happened but I thought well ill just try it so I ate the point (you know the tip of the triangle) it was nice but not fantastic. Great you think, she wont of had any more you think.... thats where your wrong over the next 5!!!!! hours!!!!!!!!!!! I ate the WHOLE piece! I dont know why I did it, it was nice but totally not worth chucking it all away for which is annoying!
I went to my Grandas tonight (my favourite man in the world) who offered me tea and cake, I was good and said no. He then said id lost some weight which was nice and I felt guilty about the cake.
Then I went to the OHs tonight after work id asked him to get me chicken breast and rocket, healthy. Good Emma.
I get there and hes brought legs- In all our time together Ive NEVER eaten meat off the bone EVER. And he bought strange lettuce stuff that I dont like. I just wanted to cry cos I couldnt eat any of it and he was eating pizza and chips. He offered me his which I obviously couldnt eat so I just felt even rubbisher. I thought whats the point I havent lost anything, Ive eaten cake I might as well eat pizza and chips... But I DIDNT!!
Just annoyed at myself.
I am going for a night out in Leeds this sat and will be eating and drinking-obvs ill try to limit the damange but I thought id be in the 12s by now. So now im thinking im going to end up putting on and thatll be awful. I just want to cry.
