11 years ago I threw out my ex husband, I had stayed with him for the children and he got more and more violent and controlling, although he never actually hit me.... but he would grab me leaving bruises, smash doors and once he threw me across the hall nearly breaking my fingers in front of my children. Although I had 8 children, I threw him out, he had told me I would never find anyone else, no one would want me and 8 children, he wouldn't even let me go out with my sister whilst we were married... and you know what, once I had thrown him out I actually felt a sense of relief that at last it was all over, even though I had to support myself and 8 children, and our heating and hot water was broken (worn out and needed replacing) and so we had neither and had to keep warm in one room and boil kettles to wash up etc, luckily we had a shower to keep clean.
You know what, we survived, wonderfully, and there was a company advertising in our local paper helping out single parents and carrying out work on their houses, and I qualified and not only got a new boiler, emersion heater and heating, but they spent over £10,000 putting in a new bathroom for me, I SURVIVED.... and then I met my now husband, and not only was he mad enough to take on me and my 8 children, he is also 15 years younger than me and we now have 2 small boys of our own, and are so so happy, and you know what, ex hubby is still trying to convince the children that they didn't see him throw me across the hall and that I tripped on a mat (that we didn't have)....
There is life after a controlling husband and that is what you deserve, of course you will cope, with the help from family and friends and for the sake of your little boy...
And the reason I think your husband doesn't want to come home tonight to sort it out, I think he is convinced you will just take him back like you have in the past and that everything can carry on as normal and he will walk over you, he doesn't believe you have the strength to get rid of him once and for all, he thinks he has total control over you.
Good luck in whatever you choose, just posted to show you that there is light at the end of the tunnel....