I've started, and I WILL finish fabulously (that's the plan anyway) :)

Morning lovely! :)

Thank you! Do you know, I actually FEEL guilty because I've made this choice! Chris's parents have eight other grand-kids and because their parents don't have a problem, it is making it look like it's me being awkward! Chris's parents have mentioned to him that they think I have a problem with THEM - I didn't, but how they're going off now, I now DO have a problem!

She was still liking photo's of Max etc., on FB until Chris went up on his own last week - he stands by what I believe is the right thing to do by Max, and swears he's told me everything that was said, but strangely since then, she's not liked a single post or photo of Max!
Now that really saddens me, because she's still liking stuff about her other grand-kids!

I feel sorry for Max, because he's missing out on a huge part of his family, but that's her choice. We gave her a choice, she even has an E-Cig, but has said to hubby on two occasions, 'My house, My rules.' So my reply was, 'My baby, My rules.'
It's causing HUGE problems, and it's not fair!

Everything I put on FB, they think is a direct dig at them!! FFS, I have better things to do than to write about them lol! There's so many other problems which have arisen since I made this decision, it's now at the point where I really don't want anything to do with them any more.

I would delete her, but haven't for the sake of hubby. I really want to, but know it would cause even more problems! It's really quite upsetting, but I have calmed down a lot, and I think, 'let them get on with it' - I feel better now Max isn't being exposed to 2nd hand smoke, which as anyone who has an iota of sense will know, is much worse than actually smoking! If I were to carry on taking him up there, I might as well light a fag and give it to him, it wouldn't do as much harm as the non-stop chain smoking she impales upon him!

And yet, I am the bad guy! Go figure!!

I JUST stopped smoking. BUT, I never ever smoked around Max, I have never smoked in the house, and if I did have a cig, I would change my clothes and wash my hands before going near him.
I still didn't feel comfortable doing that, so I've stopped with the help of an E-Cig.
So, if I don't smoke around my baby, who does she think it's okay for her to! Grrrrrrr, lol!! ;)

Thanks, you've made me feel A LOT BETTER!!! :D

Taking Max to Play Arena so he can destruct stuff in there instead of at home lol! Meeting some friends who have babies around the same age as Max, so it will be nice.

Hope you're having a good day, are you doing anything nice?

xxx
 
Wow, she sounds very set in her ways and pardon me - stupid. Her behaviour is childish and immature. Who the hell acts that way? She thinks that you being concerned for the HEALTH and WELFARE of your baby is a dig at HER? ... That lady needs a slap back to reality - the world doesn't revolve around her!!

You can 'Hide' her on Facebook and you won't see her posts and updates anymore.

And well done for quitting! I remember how hard it was, but I had a very big reason to do it - same as you, you have a big reason (Max :D) which in a way, makes it worthwhile. Plus those E-Cigs seem to do the trick for a lot of people, I've never had them when I was quitting, but that's probably a good thing. Just went cold turkey. ... which was rather awful. :p

Enjoy your day at the Play Arena with the other mums ;) I'm not doing much, staying in today. OH was going to go out tonight, plans changed, I was sort of looking forward to having an evening to myself! Was going to cook something nice for my 1000 calorie day (as per your suggestion! :) ), but not so sure now..
 
Hey Nat, just catching up lol, i wouldnt feel guilty one bit or awquard, i agree with u 100 per cent xxx
 
I completely agree as well. His mam smokes like a chimney but, she does make an effort to go out when we are there, which I appreciate. I dont expect her to quit, thats her decision to make, and hers alone. I DO, however, expect that she not smoke around my kids. My mother, THANKFULLY, has just quit smoking (again lol. she had quit for about 20 years and then my cousin was in a car accident and for some reason my mom started smoking again about 2 years ago). She has an E-cig, but never used it. Like Minerva...she went cold turkey. Im super proud of her and very grateful. We will (possibly) be living with her if/when we ever move over, until we get ourselves sorted and her quitting smoking is just one less issue that living with your mother again after 10 years (this time as a married woman with 2 children! eek!) lol.

And hilariously, Hubbys family also (well, one SIL and another niece in particular) seemed to think that EVERYTHING i post on fb was about them...and a dig. I finally just said...Look, I dont have the desire, the time or the inclination to post about you lot. If you are so paranoid about what *I* am posting on MY FB PAGE...feel free to defriend me. And they did! YAY! hahah. So now I dont have to bother with them. His family arent close so I never have to see them....other than his mother and the brother he works with. I just think that I have enough problems with my OWN family....I cant be bothered to try to appease his as well. They either like it or lump it, really. Thankfully, Hubby pretty much feels the same as I do. LOL.

So I totally feel your pain, Nat. I think you are completely right about protecting your child's health. Of course you are! And they can either understand and agree to play by your rules, when it comes to him, or not. If tabs are more important than her grandson....that is quite pathetic and quite sad! x So well done you for being such a great mum! x (And well done to you and Minerva both for quitting....Ive never smoked but I know how hard it is as I saw my mom go through it....it was rough for her.) xx
 
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Omg, Nat your mother in law sounds like a complete headwreak!!! You're dead right to stick to your guns. Fair play to ya!
 
Minerva said:
Wow, she sounds very set in her ways and pardon me - stupid. Her behaviour is childish and immature. Who the hell acts that way? She thinks that you being concerned for the HEALTH and WELFARE of your baby is a dig at HER? ... That lady needs a slap back to reality - the world doesn't revolve around her!!

You can 'Hide' her on Facebook and you won't see her posts and updates anymore.

And well done for quitting! I remember how hard it was, but I had a very big reason to do it - same as you, you have a big reason (Max :D) which in a way, makes it worthwhile. Plus those E-Cigs seem to do the trick for a lot of people, I've never had them when I was quitting, but that's probably a good thing. Just went cold turkey. ... which was rather awful. :p

Enjoy your day at the Play Arena with the other mums ;) I'm not doing much, staying in today. OH was going to go out tonight, plans changed, I was sort of looking forward to having an evening to myself! Was going to cook something nice for my 1000 calorie day (as per your suggestion! :) ), but not so sure now..
Click to expand...

Yes, she does.
And now his Dad thinks I am trying to wreck his business (he's a Tiler) because my friend (who is also a Tiler) asked me to 'like' his new FB page! I'm not even friends with his Dad on FB, so how the hell is that going to affect him! Never even thought of his Dad when I 'liked' my mates page - he just asked me to, so I did, in support!
See what mentality I'm up against? You just can't argue with stupid!
FFS, they are picking on everything, I am seriously fed up! And that's me being polite!!

Yep, she does think the world revolves around her - she sits there on bloody FB all day, every day, and won't budge! She won't visit Max here, because she says, if she does that, she'd have to visit her other three children too!
She used to say to me ALL the time, 'Ah, but you're not a real Mason!' - I put up with it, then eventually when she said it again, I replied, 'And neither are you!' - That shut her up, and she's never said it since, lol!
What's so good about being a friggin Mason anyway! Any one would think I'd married in to the Royal family!! ;) I'm much more proud of my roots, than I am of my married name. Might just revert to maiden name, because she seems to think being a Mason is the be all and end all!
FFS!!!!
I'm hiding my posts from her as of now. I know she watches everything, so now she's not going to see a thing.

My hubby thinks there isn't a problem - how can he not get it! He's supporting me, but doesn't see this big rift happening, right in front of his nose!
He's just got back from his mother's - asked him if anything was said, and he said no, but I don't believe him any more. I know something will have been said, but he's not willing to talk about it.

He thinks if it's not talked about, it will go away, well I am sorry, but it won't! They've done FAR too much damage this time (oh yes, there's been many times before!) for me to ever talk to them again, UNLESS they apologise. But that aint gonna happen. I've more chance of winning the lottery than getting an apology off them!

Grrrrr, lol!

Oh well, am going to calm down now - they're not worth it.
They're missing out - I'm certainly not!

Am doing okay - the E-Cig tends to give me a headache, but it's better than inhaling all those other toxins :)

Had a really great day, will post some pics in a bit :) Max loved it, so I'm def going there again!
Just had a salad consisting of - 2 boiled eggs, mixed leaf salad, red onions, tomatoes, cucumber, and yellow peppers - it was only a side salad size, so I worked it all out and it all comes to approx. 180 cals including a black coffee! It's great to still be able to go out to eat and not have to compromise this diet!
And OMG! I've not seen these particular friends since the end of December so they couldn't believe my weight loss! I felt really really good, and quite chuffed with myself! Very soon, I will no longer be the fat one!!

Awww! I love hubby going out too, a break lol! You can still have your 1,000+ day, just do what you were going to do anyway, and let your OH do what he likes! Shame you're not getting your evening as you hoped for - can't you just lock him out of something, lol!! ;)

xxx
 
beelishy said:
I completely agree as well. His mam smokes like a chimney but, she does make an effort to go out when we are there, which I appreciate. I dont expect her to quit, thats her decision to make, and hers alone. I DO, however, expect that she not smoke around my kids. My mother, THANKFULLY, has just quit smoking (again lol. she had quit for about 20 years and then my cousin was in a car accident and for some reason my mom started smoking again about 2 years ago). She has an E-cig, but never used it. Like Minerva...she went cold turkey. Im super proud of her and very grateful. We will (possibly) be living with her if/when we ever move over, until we get ourselves sorted and her quitting smoking is just one less issue that living with your mother again after 10 years (this time as a married woman with 2 children! eek!) lol.

And hilariously, Hubbys family also (well, one SIL and another niece in particular) seemed to think that EVERYTHING i post on fb was about them...and a dig. I finally just said...Look, I dont have the desire, the time or the inclination to post about you lot. If you are so paranoid about what *I* am posting on MY FB PAGE...feel free to defriend me. And they did! YAY! hahah. So now I dont have to bother with them. His family arent close so I never have to see them....other than his mother and the brother he works with. I just think that I have enough problems with my OWN family....I cant be bothered to try to appease his as well. They either like it or lump it, really. Thankfully, Hubby pretty much feels the same as I do. LOL.

So I totally feel your pain, Nat. I think you are completely right about protecting your child's health. Of course you are! And they can either understand and agree to play by your rules, when it comes to him, or not. If tabs are more important than her grandson....that is quite pathetic and quite sad! x So well done you for being such a great mum! x (And well done to you and Minerva both for quitting....Ive never smoked but I know how hard it is as I saw my mom go through it....it was rough for her.) xx
Click to expand...

Good Afternoon Kelly!! :)

It's really great that your MIL makes an effort. That's all I wanted - for her to smoke outside, or use her E-Cig, but she refuses. I guess she thinks if she does that for Max, she'll have to do it for all her grand-kids. VERY stubborn woman, and very set in her ways. It's her way or no way. She's even admitted, the more people ask her not to smoke, the more she'll do it.
She's 60, not 6, for goodness sake! I give up, I am dealing with idiots, so I had better start treating them as such!

Hahaha! Good for you! Love it!
Sounds like you have similar problems to me, with your hubby's family. It's a shame when things break down isn't it? But, if I was wrong, I would be the first person to apologise. I ALWAYS back down, have done for the past 15 years, but not any more! They've pushed me too far this time, I'm standing my ground.
Wish I'd done this years ago, then may be they would know I am not a pushover, not any more!
Then again, because they're so stubborn and think they're always right, I don't know if that would've worked!!

You have a healthy approach to how you treat your OH's family - I am going to take that stance from now on. Never again am I backing down - I have always done it for the sake of hubby, but he's going to have to realise, I just can't do it any more!

That's what I thought! Cigs are more important than seeing her grandson - If any one should be upset, it should be me not her!
He'll know when he's older why we never visited, or why he never saw them. If he asked me, I am not going to lie to him for their sake.

Thanks so much Kelly, all this support here makes me feel tons better! :) xxx
 
Periwinkle said:
Omg, Nat your mother in law sounds like a complete headwreak!!! You're dead right to stick to your guns. Fair play to ya!
Click to expand...

Couldn't have put it better myself, thanks Peri!! :D

Feeling much better now I've had so much support on here!!

xxx
 
Thanks for your support, every single one of you! - I feel so alone in this, can't talk to hubby any more - he thinks if it's not spoken about, it will go away!
Well, it won't, not any more. They've finally pushed me too far and I've snapped.

From now on, I want nothing at all to do with them. Am off to FB to block her from seeing my photo's and posts - fed up of her reading my stuff and thinking everything is about her!!

Thanks again Ladies, SO much!

:bighug::bighug:
 
Ur defo not alone Nat, u can always talk to us guys on here, I know its not the same as talking face to face but it will have to do lol xx:D
 
peaches10 said:
Ur defo not alone Nat, u can always talk to us guys on here, I know its not the same as talking face to face but it will have to do lol xx:D
Click to expand...

Actually, you're all so great with support and advice! I do appreciate you, thank you :)

I'm not going to talk about it again tonight to OH, but I am at some point, because I have to tell him that he might be able to sweep things under the carpet, but I can't, and if I am upset, he should be there for me instead of ignoring this great big elephant in the room!!

xxx
 
Lou_G said:
Hi Nat :) God sounds like a 'mare with the in laws - what a silly lady.

Doing great on the regime - well done!
Click to expand...

Morning Lou! :)

Tell me about it lol!! Nightmare, but I'm not going to let them get to me - they're not worth it!

Thank you! It's been a breeze compared to what I thought it would be! Think that's why I can stick to it, because it's really easy (apart from when TOTM is due, then I am freakily hungry lol!).

When's your first official weigh in due, Monday? Looking forward to hearing your results, it's exciting hearing how well everyone is doing!! :)

Have a FAB day!!
xxx
 
Aww it must have been so nice to see friends you haven't seen for ages!! I hope you soaked up all those lovely compliments ;)
Hopefully the wicked witch of the mother-in-law is now hidden and blocked from your updates - so no more pain and suffering!! :D

Any plans for today? :) x
 
Hey Nat, hope you have had a good day xx
 
Hiya Minerva,

Sorry for my late reply, been dashing around doing chores so that tomo is totally free, my very 1st Mother's Day, whoop!

The compliments were lovely - not used to them!!

Sadly, OH's sister has now started :( I just want to get rid of them all off facebook so I don't have to see them and they can't see me, but as hubby seems to be of the mindset that this will blow over if we don't go on about it, I don't see how this is going to get sorted! If I delete them, it will cause big problems!!

So sad for Max - he has a huge family on hubby's side he's never going to see, all because I kindly asked for no more smoking around Max!

Can't believe it's gone this far - too far for me to forgive now, I've finally snapped.

Oh well, trying not to let it get to me, but it's very hard when they're sniping on FB, and I can't do a thing about it!
What also hurts is, they're also ignoring photo's of Max which I've put on recently - they're still liking and commenting on his cousin (who's 5 weeks older than Max), but ignoring my Max! What's he done wrong! It's so very upsetting!!

Just watching Saturday Night Takeaway, some of it's a laugh - taking my mind off this nightmare!!

Hope you've have a good day lovely?

xxx
 
peaches10 said:
Hey Nat, hope you have had a good day xx
Click to expand...

Had better my lovely! Surrounded by horrible people and I can't do a thing about it, arrgggghhh!!
I just don't know what to do for the best - I can't pretend to like them because I'm not that sort of person, but if I delete them from facebook, that will cause problems for hubby, and I don't think it's fair as he's stuck in the middle of all this, even though he sides with me re the smoking malarkey.
Think I need some divine intervention, lol!!

Hope you've had a lovely day? xxx
 
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