Karens Herbalife Diary- bad penny returns :D

[Karen]

im going to start a diary now to keep myself occupied and so that i have a record of my progress. I have started 2 blogs but always end up here at minimins and don't bother with them so I am just merging them into my favourite site instead!

Whats on my mind today is how I have had such a short fuse for the last 2 days. I am in the middle of a period but this feel like its something a little more than that.

I think ordinarily feeling the way i do right now, i would have just eaten my way through the day and never picked up on the fact I am feeling something uncomfortable on a deeper level. I've spent so long masking and "swallowing" my emotions with food that I find it quite hard to allow thing to surface properly. Must be some awful underlying emotions to be 10 stones over weight! (well just under 9 stones overweight now thanks to CD )

So I am just going to go with the feelings and let them surface in their own time.

On a lighter note, my toddler told me he loves me today for the first time ever without being prompted or anything! thats made my day. he said it to his daddy first but thats ok, i can handle that. I'll spit in daddies dinner later. JUST KIDDING!

 

[flirty40greeneyes]

PMSL - if I was your OH I think i'd offer to cook my own dinner!! LOL

Ahhhhhhhhh aren't babies lovely when they do and say things like that??? Makes you go all weak at the knees!

I think we all analyse our emotions/thoughts/actions when we are not eating. Not sure why .... I know I need to look into why I use food as a comfort during times of stress, with family etc, but can deal with stress in the work place. I know food is my treat to myself - so I'm trying to give myself travel instead and go visiting places.

Good luck on the introspection, diet and give your gorgeous son a hug!

 

[Mini]

Hi Karen,

Look forward to reading your diary as I know it will be very entertaining

When your on a vlcd it can and does play havoc with your hormones but when you revert back to eating again they do settle down.

It is due in part to the quick release of estrogen from the fat entering your blood stream and this by the way can increase your fertility.

What a beautiful precious moment for you when your child said he loved you

I think every child says da da first!

Love Mini xxx

 

[dizzy-n-mizzy]

Hi Karen

You certainly seem to be someone who has their head screwed on and are hilarious with it. I'm so pleased you have started to write a diary I will try my best to keep up with it. I'm sure I can learn a lot about myself and my own habits along with you.

Dizzy x

 

[sonkie]

On a lighter note, my toddler told me he loves me today for the first time ever without being prompted or anything! thats made my day. he said it to his daddy first but thats ok, i can handle that. I'll spit in daddies dinner later. JUST KIDDING!

Yeh right kiddin my arse.........just reminds me of the eminem video in the fast food place eeeewwwwwww......ahhh little Ady is growing up soooo fast

 

[Karen]

mmmm eminem....he'd get it...willingly or not!

thanks for the replies! cant say this diary will always be entertaining (if ever) as i have my share of demons and i think abstaining from the thing i use to block it all, it will encourage the buggers to leap from the closet but i am doing this to be true to myself and what my journey is really like

i understand about not being sure about keeping up with peoples diaries. i havent read anyones diaries (except icemooses but that was before i came to minimins) as they are usually 3 million pages long already and theres so much to keep me occupied in the current forums. not to mention the fact im a dozy moo who would forget whos diary shes read or not

 

[Karen]

oh and flirty, if u tasted my cooking u'd offer to make ur own regardless!

 

[sonkie]

oh and flirty, if u tasted my cooking u'd offer to make ur own regardless!

It cant be that bad................can it ?....lol pmsl

 

[xxluckyxx]

Hi Karen
Keeping a diary hey ! You will do well hun because you want to , you are stronger than you realise and you have alot of support around you , just scream at one of us to listen , if we are already listening scream a little harder !!! LOL
Life begins at 30 mate heehee !
bless little Ady , they are so cute at his age . big hugs hun xxx

 

[kazz]

Glad you decided to keep a diary!

I think its ace that your little boy said he loves you without prompting....but am feeling a bit worried about wat could happen to your hubby lol!

 

[Karen]

thanks sam, it means a lot to have a safety net of support

hubby is still quite safe kazz.

on a serious note, im glad ady said he loves his dad first cos my hubby has been feeling a bit pushed out lately.

a few days ago my hubby forgot his door keys and i was out so he couldnt get in the house after he finished work. he called my mobile and asked me to collect him from the pub. poor man had to go for a pint cos it was raining and he didnt wanna wait on the doorstep. bless him...the hardship of it all!

left him there for a while so he could have at least 2 pints. not out of generosity but because my intention was to drag him to B & Q straight after to buy a new kitchen in the January sales and he gets a bit generous when hes had a drink (im no fool!!) i wanted to make sure i can get an intergrated dishwasher and all the trimmings, u see? lol.

so my 2 eldest got left at my parents (never attempt to buy a new kitchen with 3 kids in tow!) and i took ady with me to drag daddy out the pub. before entering the pub, knowing it would look convincing with a toddler in my arms, i had this sinister idea to just storm in and scream across the bar at him that he ought to come home and bring some food for the starving kids instead of going straight to the pub from work. ok it was cruel but i thought it would be hilerious. of course, i wouldnt have kept it going. just long enough for him to shrivel and die inside

stopped myself though because hes not like me...hes quite shy, not at all gobby and would die of shame so he wouldnt be so likely to buy me a new kitchen right afterwards. (hes not shy when hes drunk though...i even managed to get him to do a strip tease for me, sonkie and xxluckyxx once but thats a whole other story...)

anyways, we go in and everyone is aww-ing at ady and kev gets all proud. then he goes to pick ady up and ady jumps behind me. ady wont look at him and keeps shouting "NO" when kev asks him for a cuddle. this went on for about 10 minutes with the regulars looking a bit embarressed for kev. ady was giving him evil stares and pursed lips from behind my leg. even i was cringing. poor hubby was mortified. you'd have thought ady never knew him. naturally kev was hurt and went on and on about it all night and a few times since.

so...after my mad ramblings....this is why i am glad kev got to hear it from ady first. he gets full bragging rights and can forget the time he tried to show off his son only for his son to act like he was a complete stranger lol.

oh...and i got my new kitchen. it arrives on 15th of Feb

 

[Karen]

It is due in part to the quick release of estrogen from the fat entering your blood stream and this by the way can increase your fertility.

THAT will NOT be a problem for me...

I requested to be sterilised during my last c.section. in fact, the surgeon offered to put 2 clips on each side as oppose to the usual 1 each side. I think he was as keen to not ever see me on his table again as much as i was keen to never be on his table again lol.

i suspect his reasons were mainly due to the fact i took about an hour to let them give me the epidural. Im such an infamous wimp and refused to let them touch me until i was well and truely slaughtered on gas and air. there was no chance of them jabbing a great ruddy needle into my spine without me being as high as a kite! i started out crying terrified and eventually got wheeled in singing and laughing hysterically. aww jeez i just love a nice gas and air session lol

 

[dizzy-n-mizzy]

Still entertaining Karen, glad you got the new kitchen how exciting!

I love the small print exemption clause!

Dizzy x

 

[xxluckyxx]

Wow a new kitchen ! how great is that .
Did you have a good time away hun ?
You do have a hectic life , dont you !
What did you think of sonkies ryhmes ???
How funny LOL
Catch you soon , hope all is well xxx

 

[Karen]

heya lucky! fab little dittys by sonya! i will update this properly later. kevin is running around packing for china. i have a whole week (maybe more) husbandless. anyone want another party??

 

[sonkie]

heya lucky! fab little dittys by sonya! i will update this properly later. kevin is running around packing for china. i have a whole week (maybe more) husbandless. anyone want another party??

As long as there is no food or alcohol.
We will get drunk on water.....lol

:tear_drop: :tear_drop: :tear_drop: :tear_drop: :tear_drop:

 

[xxluckyxx]

Party , party , party !!!!! hehe

 

[sonkie]

Wahooo a water party.....:tear_drop: :tear_drop: :tear_drop: :tear_drop: :tear_drop: then we can help Karen sort out what pics to put in her new book "the Karensutra".....as in sex lives thread.

 

[Karen]

why i am dieting...

oh my god i have finally struggled my way back into ketosis since my birthday blips (more of a earthquake than a blip but hey-ho!)

got back on track tuesday whist still in Salisbury with Kev. He was starving as we walked around the cathedral and by the time we started to walk around the town he was drooling at the burger king we were passing. I asked him if he'd like to go in and thought he would say no but he had dashed thru the doors and was ordering a great big angus meal before i could finish my sentance!

so i asked for only a carton of boiled water. the girl at the counter looked at me like i was mad and asked if that was all? luckily i had asked kev to shove a CD soup into his pocket before leaving the hotel so i sat drinking that.

note to all readers....it takes ages to stir a mushroom soup to a smooth consistancy with a plastic tea stirrer so avoid ever having to do so at all costs!

anyways, i have been on the wagon ever since. I nearly fell back off lastnight but had to stay strong. I popped into asda to pick up packed lunch stuff for hubby and the kids. I shoved crisps and nuts in my trolly with the pure intention of eating my head off on arriving home. I walked around the shop totally justifying myself and resigning myself to feeling guilty and setting myself back all over again.

then when i got to the til i panicked and pretended i had forgotten something. then i ran around putting everything back and went to the magazine ailse instead. I picked up a copy of lighterlife and health & fitness (its got a free workout DVD in it this week people!!) and also the new Dean Koontz book (hes way better than stephen king and ive read all his books so far). i was almost in tears when i left the shop but felt great by the time i got home.

so i am struggling and need to remind myself why I am doing this diet. the fact that hubby is away in China this week means i have no one to police me either so i am worried about screwing up. afterall...i almost cant be trusted to buy sandwich meats and cheese strings for the kids without filling my face with spicy cashew nuts in the car on the way home!

so! i need to keep motivated and distracted for the weekend. i need to remember why i am here on this mental (but brilliant) diet. need a loo break first though! will post shortly

 

[dizzy-n-mizzy]

Hi Karen

You have done really brill to get back on track and into ketosis. You are right to continue to be cautious though for the next day or so.

What do you mean no one to police you. We are all hear + your mates in Plymouth will keep a close eye.

Really impressed at you getting back on track so soon.

Dizzy x