Total Solution Lily Cherry's Journey to Slim!

[christmasfairy1]

Hey ! Better to have an extra bar than blow it all then regret it eh?
Why not have a sneaky peak at the scales? It might spur you on .
Well done for getting so far anyway
Each day you stick at it I's a day closer to your goals!!! X x

 

[Lily_Cherry]

Well, I messed up today I got myself caught up in an internal self pitying monologue and the gremlin won and I ate something - it didn't taste magical, it didn't make all my anxiety go away and it certanly didn't make me feel better about about having all this weight to lose and feeling unattractive and invisible.

I think the reason I ate was a sort of spite against the diet "Ha I can eat what i want, look i'll eat this and i don't even like this" just absolute insanity! I was convinced I was done with the diet and then a little while later I was mentally slapping myself on the head and wondering what I was thinking??

I'm not going to make myself feel bad about it, I'm not going to obsess over it, i've done enough of that today and for the past few years.

In a way I suppose it's a good thing, I realised food isn't this wonderful thing I was building it up to be in my head, it'll always be there and it'll be there when I've lost weight and I don't want it to have a hold over me anymore.

So thats it, I'm back to it now, I know I've put myself pretty much back to square one but hopefully - lesson learnt!

 

[Lily_Cherry]

I've been trying to think what I could have don't differently this evening to have stopped myself from eating - so that I'm more prepared for if/when it happens again.

1) Not be alone - PM someone/post on here, text a friend, be with my OH

2) 'window shop' online or if it's as bad as today treat myself to a little something

I know I just wasn't in the mindframe to listen to advice today, I was in that stroppy "i'm-the-only-person-in-the-world-to-ever-feel-like-this-poor-me" mindset which is just idiotic, I'm going to have to think of a way to stop that - maybe I was also indulging in the feeling so that I could rebel against the diet - I think thats true actually!!

I need to think more about non food treats and rewards.

I'm not entirely sure what kicked this off today, I was struggling so I decided to weigh myself to give me a boost but i was dissapointed with my 5lb loss - i think I then wanted to use that as an excuse to give up and I just wasn't thinking straight - it seems odd now that I'm fine to look back at the muddled way I was thinking and try to work out how I would get some sense into that tangle of emotions!

I also obviously need to have a good think about how to cope with weighing days.

Gosh! This is a total mind f***!!!

I'm a bit scared now about what the next few days are going to be like after my blip, I didn't binge but I did have carbs and sugar - not much as I quickly realised it was doing nothing - but probably enough to boot me out of ketosis!

 

[christmasfairy1]

Hey hey try calm down mate it's not good getting yourself so stressed out.
The head stuff I's terrible i agree, but you need to distract yourself into doing something else when these thoughts come into your head , i don't know why our brains do this to us but the most difficult thing for me bout dieting I's the head " hunger" i almost always give I'n to it . It's so destructive , please don't think you are on your own Hun , you're not i promise u , stay off the scAles the next few days and up your water get back on ts an fight the good fight x x x x you van do this x x. X