Literally want to burst into Tears!!!!!

[emmaedes]

Hello all

ok "strugglers" sums me up right now!!!! i am struggling big time

I am 22 years old and i feel like a frump, i feel like i have to cover up! i moved out with my boyfriend September 2012......and i haven't felt more uncomfortable in myself.....i feel 100% comfortable with him hence the weight gain!!!! i just feel so low atm i dont know what to do! i just eat and eat and eat!!!

for example by 9am this morning i had eaten 2 x kit kats and 4 x slices of WW toast.............. ridiculous!!! who eats chocolate before 9am!!! Yesterday i had: 2 x toast, 4 x chocolate hob nobs, chunky kit kat, quavers, prawn mayo sandwich, rumblers yoghurt and granola, 3 x packets of snack a jacks (WHILST waiting for dinner to cook.....how ridiculous!!!! eating three packets of crisps whilst waiting for dinner to cook!! i wasnt even hungry!!!) chicken breast and vegetables marinated in paprika and cooked in the oven, jacket potato.....

honestly just mindless eating.....i cant help myself ! im so upset right now! i dont know what to do with myself, im currently 14st 10lbs......im going on holiday on 1st October so thats my ultimate goal.....i dont know what to do with myself

 

[Fatty Bom Bom]

That sounds an awful lot like me. Sometimes I think I just ate for the sake of eating and not even thinking about what I was putting it in to my body which is why Exante will work for me because I concentrate on why I put so much weight on and re-educate myself how to eat properly.

I'm sure you can do it, perhaps you could try counting to 10 before you decide if you actually want to eat what you've chosen so it gives you the chance to think about it and decide what you really want or don't want.

 

[MrsKing]

I know how you feel as it is easily done and when you write it down it sounds like so much !!! Have you tried planning your day ?? Try save syns for the evening time and decide on set meal times.
I find i struggle once i have picked the kids up from school so its usually around 3.45pm if i start picking i never fancy tea and eat rubbish rather than waiting for a filling SW tea and then a syn or 2 at night
x

 

[Baby_Cakes]

Hi Emmaedes,

You sound an awful lot like me! I'm uncontrollable around food. What diet/eating plan are you looking to follow? We have the same start weight and same rough goal date. Do you want to provide support for one another?

 

[The Caretaker]

Hi there, have you thought of buddying up with someone? It might help yo when your feeling the urge to get on the phone and talk through it? Just a thought, good luck mate

 

[Smurfette23]

Hiya emmaedes

I feel like a frump too all my clothes are becoming too tight and unflattering (well that's what I tell myself - but we both know its not the clothes changing I'm the one putting on the poundage!!!). I absolutely crave fried foods, biscuits, cakes and chocolate (and we're talking 120g bars a day). I eat when I'm bored, feeling lonely, stressed with work, upset or even happy so basically ... I eat all the time, hungry or not. I feel so ashamed of myself, especially when others comment on how much crap I am eating :'( but I can't keep going like this and it's has encouraged me to go to the gym and start slimming world on Monday. I feel like I need to change my whole relationship with food or I'll end up "struggling and restarting" all over again ... I just don't know where to start. I have a friends hen do in 12 weeks, so I would like to fit into my dress for the occasion.

I'd be beaming ear to ear if I loose 5lbs in 2 weeks. Don't be too hard on yourself! We all feel this way ... but the trick is to keep going and ask for help when you need it.

The three things I am going to try this week are:
A) Plan my meals and make things in bulk for when I'm peckish (soups, veg, pasta, homemade crisps)
B) Have plenty of sweet treats available (i freeze curly wurlys so that they take longer to eat, dark chocolate, mini-milk ice lollys etc.)
C) Be active for 30 mins a day (walk the dog, go for a run, fitness dvd)

I don't know whether they'll help you or not, but judging from our similarities they just might! Good luck and keep us posted on your journey.

 

[emmaedes]

Hi All

Firstly - thank you so much for your replies!! Secondly - sorry I haven't replied sooner!!

Right so I thought I wanted to burst into years before ..... But right now I am lowest of the low!!! It's ridiculous I had a day off work Friday!! Thought excellent perfect chance to clean the apartment keep me busy and start a fresh .... Biscuits for breakfast ..... Crisps for lunch and a macaroni cheese at 700cals!!!!!! Ouch!!! And then obviously dinner .... More crisps .... More chocolate leaving me feeling bloated and crap!!

Today.....went to watch oh play football at 2 .... He had work from 8:30 and went straight to football!! This left me up early and alone bored in the apartment for 5/6 hrs. . . Que the share bag of McCoys crisps chocolate biscuits, twice, kit kat, more crisps, toast, more toast ..... And this is literally by 11am!!!!!! And then went to watch him play football got back .... We had curry for dinner ... Korma, rice, naan, papadoms, onion bhajee .... The lot!!!! And half way through I got really full and though god maybe my stomach has shrunk .... Erm no you fat cow you have eaten about three times ur daily calories already .... Did I stop?! Obviously not?!!!!!

So now I feel horrid! I feel ashamed?? Maybe I need this to happen to fully kick me up the arse!!!! Today I'm going to my mums for a roast and then to take the puppies on a walk!! So I plan to not eat until then! Lets face it I ate well enough yesterday to last me till 1 today!!! Plus I haven't felt hungry for days!!! Just been constant eating!!! Then Tomo will start back with my porridge in the mornings! Pitta made at lunch and a small dinner!!!!

Need to get out the house more!!! So that might mean puppy will get tired of walks .... Actually he won't he's like a wind up toy the amount of energy he has haha!!!

Also with my OH right now I don't want him to touch me let alone see me undressed. . . This is NOT helpful to our relationship and its all my fault!?! Can't carry on!!

Once again thank u for all ur replies each and everyone has helped me no end!!!! Big time and I mean it!!!! Xxxxxxx

Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins

 

[missRV]

Your eating habits sound so much like mine used to be
It sounds like you're eating because you're bored; emotional; busy; tired; and mostly UNHAPPY... your unhappyness is causing your eating which is causing for you to not feel happy about yourself so effectively you're looking at food as your source of comfort, but food is one of the reasons why you need the comfort in the first place.

Your partner sounds lovely and I'm sure it's not going to be the case for you but please don't let him say "I like you as you are" the important thing is that you do it for yourself. If you're happy then keep going if you're not then change, do something about it.

You sound like you need the regime of a proper diet rather than just 'cutting down' have you thought of joining a group like SW or WW? Failing that, get some healthy low fat snacky foods in like fruit and veggies and have these at the ready for when you're hungry. Think about drinking more water, could it be that you're actually thirsty and your body is telling you you're hungry. Aim for 5-10 portions of fruit or veg a day, you'll feel fuller and less likely to nibble.

And above all, STOP BEING SO HARD ON YOURSELF ok you have a chocolate bar or a bag of crisps, don't start hating yourself and think "I've blown it, I'll have another" Think of a non food way or treating yourself, like a night out, a new top or a new lipstick. You're so young please don't let this stop you from enjoying yourself.

 

[Baby_Cakes]

So much you say rings true. I moved in with my husband three years ago in April. Our first Christmas together was a nightmare - all I did was cry. I missed home, I missed my family - I still do. My husband works continental shifts - 12 hours, both days and nights. I find its the time that I am alone that I'll eat and eat and eat. Its awful.

I started a new job in September close to my familys home. I'll go there in the morning before work and I'll walk up to see mum during the lunch times. I feel a LOT happier for seeing them more but I do still miss them - especially when hubby is working nights.

I have no real friends, so I dont see a lot of people and have no one really to confide in. I'm uncomfortable, I hate myself. I dont like my husband touching me all the time but he insists he loves me the way I am.

Its got to be done. I'm currently researching slimming world - the only way I've lost weight before is calorie counting and exercise!

 

[emmaedes]

So much you say rings true. I moved in with my husband three years ago in April. Our first Christmas together was a nightmare - all I did was cry. I missed home, I missed my family - I still do. My husband works continental shifts - 12 hours, both days and nights. I find its the time that I am alone that I'll eat and eat and eat. Its awful.

I started a new job in September close to my familys home. I'll go there in the morning before work and I'll walk up to see mum during the lunch times. I feel a LOT happier for seeing them more but I do still miss them - especially when hubby is working nights.

I have no real friends, so I dont see a lot of people and have no one really to confide in. I'm uncomfortable, I hate myself. I dont like my husband touching me all the time but he insists he loves me the way I am.

Its got to be done. I'm currently researching slimming world - the only way I've lost weight before is calorie counting and exercise!

Hi Hun

It's sounds like your quite similar to me!!! It's when my bf is out that I would eat as like a comfort for not feeling lonely. He isn't out as much as your hubby by sounds of it through work but I can definitely sympathise with you!

Ok gonna go into preacher mode now .... I've discovered something which has already boosted my confidence made me less stressed about weight etc too... It's Paul McKenna I can make you thin - it's amazing!!! I've read the book very short so didn't take long. I'm yet to listen to the audio though which I need to as I need a remember daily!! But honestly I started a week ago today and have felt fab ever since!!!! I highly recommend it!! It helps so much with confidence levels too which sounds like - like me - you need a boost there. I downloaded it on my iPhone but you can buy it on amazon and loads of places too!!

Xxxxxx

Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins

 

[Baby_Cakes]

I think I need more hobbies. I need something to do when hubby is at work, early in the morning and late at night. I'm contemplating using the time to exercise and study to further my career.

 

[SianLeighan]

This sounds exactly like my story although I still live with my parents. I seem to be stuck in some awful circle,

I look in the mirror and hate how I look which makes me miserable.

Because I'm then miserable I eat.

I then get bigger which makes me worse.

So I eat more.

At the moment this is the only part of my life bringing me down. The OH keeps telling me I don't need to lose weight, he says 'There's a difference between want and need' (He obviously doesn't understand this difference )

It doesn't help that I only get to see him weekends and on a Sunday night he leaves I get all sad and want to eat comfort food.

I've started on the Tesco's ultra slim shakes this week so fingers crossed I can get out of this rut!! I ideally would like to lose at least 7lb by the end of March for my cousins wedding.

My biggest problem is when I get hungry I can't decide what I want to eat and end up cooking way too much but eating it all, whilst eating as I cook.

 

[emmaedes]

This sounds exactly like my story although I still live with my parents. I seem to be stuck in some awful circle,

I look in the mirror and hate how I look which makes me miserable.

Because I'm then miserable I eat.

I then get bigger which makes me worse.

So I eat more.

At the moment this is the only part of my life bringing me down. The OH keeps telling me I don't need to lose weight, he says 'There's a difference between want and need' (He obviously doesn't understand this difference )

It doesn't help that I only get to see him weekends and on a Sunday night he leaves I get all sad and want to eat comfort food.

I've started on the Tesco's ultra slim shakes this week so fingers crossed I can get out of this rut!! I ideally would like to lose at least 7lb by the end of March for my cousins wedding.

My biggest problem is when I get hungry I can't decide what I want to eat and end up cooking way too much but eating it all, whilst eating as I cook.

aw you sound exactly like me!!! especially the when your hungry you eat too much!! and eat whilst cooking! thats so me!! its like a panic!! and you eat as much as you can!!!

i know i sound like a preacher but i couldnt suggest Paul McKenna anymore!! he is amazing!!!

but well done on Tesco Ultra Slim at least you have taken the step in the right direction! how are you finding it?!xxx

 

[SianLeighan]

aw you sound exactly like me!!! especially the when your hungry you eat too much!! and eat whilst cooking! thats so me!! its like a panic!! and you eat as much as you can!!!

i know i sound like a preacher but i couldnt suggest Paul McKenna anymore!! he is amazing!!!

but well done on Tesco Ultra Slim at least you have taken the step in the right direction! how are you finding it?!xxx

Yes! That is me all over! When I was younger I never had a problem with my weight, right up until I turned 18. Then I started going out and drinking, then the next day I'd eat 'hangover food' then as my weight crept up my eating habits got worse. So now I've hit 20 and am pretty much 4 stone heavier than I was on my 18th Birthday something needs to be done and I know I'm the only one who can do anything about it!

Well yesterday was a bit rushed as I woke up late so didn't have time to make the shakes before work so had to hand mix it and it wasn't nice. So I only had half a shake all day yesterday and then when I got home I was starving and ate loads :/ but today is okay. I've had 2 shakes today and will have a small jacket potato and salad for dinner. I think as this week goes on it's going to get harder. Especially the weekend. When the shakes are mixed properly I think they're really yummy!!

Really? I'll have to look into it. I need something that can motivate me and kickstart this weight loss. I hate feeling like this and with summer on the way I need to do something!

How are you getting on?xxx

 

[emmaedes]

Yes! That is me all over! When I was younger I never had a problem with my weight, right up until I turned 18. Then I started going out and drinking, then the next day I'd eat 'hangover food' then as my weight crept up my eating habits got worse. So now I've hit 20 and am pretty much 4 stone heavier than I was on my 18th Birthday something needs to be done and I know I'm the only one who can do anything about it!

Well yesterday was a bit rushed as I woke up late so didn't have time to make the shakes before work so had to hand mix it and it wasn't nice. So I only had half a shake all day yesterday and then when I got home I was starving and ate loads :/ but today is okay. I've had 2 shakes today and will have a small jacket potato and salad for dinner. I think as this week goes on it's going to get harder. Especially the weekend. When the shakes are mixed properly I think they're really yummy!!

Really? I'll have to look into it. I need something that can motivate me and kickstart this weight loss. I hate feeling like this and with summer on the way I need to do something!

How are you getting on?xxx

omg this is so me!!! lol when i was 18 i was a size ten! not even really thought that much about weight! just never ate huge amounts.............then started going out, started seeing my bf then boom 22 and 14st 12lbs!! eek!!!

we will get back to our 18 year old bodies lol!!!

ooo well done!! sounds good!! are you weighing weekly? do you have a diary i can follow?

im feeling fab tbh!! and its only because of doing this Paul Mckenna thing, im not following a diet, i have to wait two weeks until first weigh in, im a week in! so weigh in next week but feel as if i have lost weight!!! i know today has reminded me (because the sun is out) why im doing this!!! im determined!!! xxxx

 

[SianLeighan]

omg this is so me!!! lol when i was 18 i was a size ten! not even really thought that much about weight! just never ate huge amounts.............then started going out, started seeing my bf then boom 22 and 14st 12lbs!! eek!!!

we will get back to our 18 year old bodies lol!!!

ooo well done!! sounds good!! are you weighing weekly? do you have a diary i can follow?

im feeling fab tbh!! and its only because of doing this Paul Mckenna thing, im not following a diet, i have to wait two weeks until first weigh in, im a week in! so weigh in next week but feel as if i have lost weight!!! i know today has reminded me (because the sun is out) why im doing this!!! im determined!!! xxxx

Yes we will! And we will be so much happier for it!!

Yeah I will be weighing weekly. Haven't started a diary yet, was thinking about doing one though. Do you have one?

I'm sitting at work next to the window and it really does make me realise I need to do something. I'm determined to be able to wear shorts and feel comfortable in them again for summer...possibly a bit optimistic but I'm gonna try my hardest!!xxx

 

[emmaedes]

Yes we will! And we will be so much happier for it!!

Yeah I will be weighing weekly. Haven't started a diary yet, was thinking about doing one though. Do you have one?

I'm sitting at work next to the window and it really does make me realise I need to do something. I'm determined to be able to wear shorts and feel comfortable in them again for summer...possibly a bit optimistic but I'm gonna try my hardest!!xxx

ooo thats good! yes i have but its in the silver section (think you have to have posted over 500 times to see that bit) so let me know if you do set one up so i can keep up to date with you!

ooo yes same!!! not optimistic at all!! we can def do it!! xxx

 

[SianLeighan]

ooo thats good! yes i have but its in the silver section (think you have to have posted over 500 times to see that bit) so let me know if you do set one up so i can keep up to date with you!

ooo yes same!!! not optimistic at all!! we can def do it!! xxx

Oooh okay. Well I may start one soon...You'll just have to check in on there and let me know how you're getting on!

I'm really hoping I can do it. I've been stuck in this rut for long enough now xxx

 

[emmaedes]

Oooh okay. Well I may start one soon...You'll just have to check in on there and let me know how you're getting on!

I'm really hoping I can do it. I've been stuck in this rut for long enough now xxx

yes defo

i know me too!!! getting majorly fed up and shouldnt feel like that at 22!! so thought i must do something about it! instead feeling frumpy etc!! i need to get to the gym too but just havent had the time or energy recently!!! think with the lighter evenings that will help!! so the day feels longer! otherwise i dont get home before dark!! its annoying lol

xxx

 

[SianLeighan]

yes defo

i know me too!!! getting majorly fed up and shouldnt feel like that at 22!! so thought i must do something about it! instead feeling frumpy etc!! i need to get to the gym too but just havent had the time or energy recently!!! think with the lighter evenings that will help!! so the day feels longer! otherwise I don't get home before dark!! its annoying lol

xxx

Yeah ideally I need to join a gym, but I work most days from 7.30am - 6/6.30pm so for me workout dvd's look like the way forward, but the thought of doing them puts me off...I think once I start to feel better about myself and have more energy then I'll start the dvd's xxx