Man Flu !!!

Discussion in 'Slimming World Off Topic' started by fillymum, 2 November 2010 Social URL.

  1. fillymum

    fillymum synful soul

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    I could not resist sharing this with you. One of the girls on my BC support site posted it as her husband is suffering a particularly bad bout of the dreaded man flu.............

    Man Flu

    1. Man-Flu is more painful than childbirth. This is an irrefutable
    scientific fact*.
    *(Based on a survey of over 100,000 men.)

    2. Man-Flu is not 'just a cold'. It is a condition so severe that the
    germs from a single Man-Flu sneeze could wipe out entire tribes of
    people living in the rain-forest. And probably loads of monkeys too.

    3. Women do not contract Man-Flu. At worst they suffer from what is
    medically recognised as a 'Mild Girly Sniffle' - which, if a man caught,
    he would still be able to run, throw a ball, tear the phone book in half
    and compete in all other kinds of manly activities.

    4. Men do not 'moan' when they have Man-Flu. They emit involuntary
    groans of agony that are entirely in proportion to the unbearable pain
    they are in..

    5. Full recovery from Man-Flu will take place much quicker if their
    simple requests for care, sympathy and regular cups of tea or coffee are
    met. Is that really so much to ask? Florence Nightingale would have done
    it

    6. More men die each year from MFN (Man-Flu Neglect) than lots and lots
    of other things. (Like rabbit attacks or choking on toast).

    7. Men suffering from Man-Flu want nothing more than to get out of bed
    and come to work, but they are too selfless to risk spreading this awful
    condition amongst their friends and colleagues. In this sense, they are
    the greatest heroes this country has ever known.

    8. In 1982 scientists managed to simulate the agonising symptoms of full
    blown Man-Flu in a female chimp. She became so ill that her head
    literally fell off.

    9. Man-Flu germs are more powerful than Rambo, Batman and The A-Team
    combined. They are too strong for weak, nasty tasting 'lady medicines'
    like Lemsip, so don't bother trying to force them on a victim of
    Man-Flu.

    10. While it may seem like a Man-Flu sufferer is just lying around
    enjoying 'Diagnosis Murder' it is a commonly recognised [COLOR=blue! important][COLOR=blue! important]medical[/COLOR][/COLOR] fact
    that the exact pitch and frequency of Dick Van Dyke's voice has
    remarkable soothing powers.

    Every minute in this country one man is struck down by Man-Flu. Women,
    all we ask is that each of you offers them a cup of tea or coffee, some
    kind words and your undivided attention and care. Then maybe, just
    maybe, we'll beat this monstrous disease together.
     
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  3. Sam1988

    Sam1988 I ♥ Slimming World

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    This is brilliant!! i have sent it to my OH by email....hmmm i wonder why he hasn't responded??!! :)
    xxx
     
  4. *EB*

    *EB* Gold Member

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    this is sooo funny :)
     
  5. dudette2001uk

    dudette2001uk I will be a Princess!

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    Haha!! This is hilarious! :D :8855: xxx
     
  6. chris_s

    chris_s Less of a man each day

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    What's funny about it? It's true.

    Women just don't know how lucky they are!
     
  7. Maximus

    Maximus Gold Member

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    Yes, I demand apologies from all insensitive member of the so-called fairer sex;)

    I don't think you truly understand the gravity of such situations. Oh yes and the pathetic little whine we make, often accompanied by a melodramatic back-of-hand-to-head gesture is a reflex action and not to be taken lightly you know.

    PS, plumping up pillows really does help:p

    Steve
     
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