Megan's Diary - Start of a New Chapter

scarlettcloud

Full Member
Hi everyone.
Well i have already done a few posts so far on how my Lipotrim journey is going.
I joined the site about 3 weeks ago when i was on holiday so i did an introduction thread here:
http://www.minimins.com/introductions/164798-hello-newbie.html
hope the link works.

So i am going to use this thread as my diary and regularly update here. I love this site it is soo motivating!!!

I am on day 5 of lipotrim and feeling good. i feel positive about this diet. i also had a personal training session last night and it was hard but really good.
 
been feeling really hungry this afternoon moreso than the first few days and i know its cos i have not drank as much water today. all the other days, by this time of day i would have had 3 litres in me but today so far i think only just under 2. its just been a superbusy day and i forgot. my baby is away to his daddy for the weekend just dropped him off so am gonna have a sleep !!
 
just had my 3rd shake of the day and some more water!!! usually on a friday night i would get a takeaway and im feeling very tempted tonight!!! but i cant do it!!!! and anyway, i bloody left my purse in the hood of the pram which is now at ex's house as he has the baby. so i have no money for anything!!! altho i was going to go into town and buy some make up for my formal next week and i cant even do that cos i dont have my purse!!!!

:(
 
Oh Megan, I've just read your initial post. What a cruel thing your husband did :( You really have been through the mill you poor thing. Good on you though for being strong and tackling things head on now with Lipotrim. It can't have been easy for you.

I can relate to lots of elements of your post outside of the relationship things. Regardless of my weight, I've always been on to exercise regularly and when I lost a lot of weight on LL in 2005 I really picked up the exercise and was super fit, doing bout 5 step classes a week, running 5k's (could've done more, but running bored me lol). Out of the blue though I developed depression very severely and things went downhill from there. I then came off my step midway through a class (I wasn't concentrating) and sprained one ankle, and broke the other in 2 places, dislocated it and ruptured the tendon :( It was awful. I spent 10 days in hospital and had surgery to repair the fracture with a plate and 6 pins. The tendon also had to be sutured back together. My depression continued for a good few years or so. I can't really remember now, it's all such a blur (I was off sick from work for 15 months of that), with the very darkest part of it lasting a good 12 months. The combination of meds and depression meant the weight that I'd lost during LL just piled back on.

I'm in a good place now and have been for about 10 months or so, and I feel I have come out of the other side of depression completely. Now I'm tackling the weight. My ankle is good, not 100%, but good. I can exercise on it, run, jump, whatever, although I am cautions as I know it's weak (I broke the same ankle and had it pinned when I was 13 - now have a scar each side lol). I have even done a few basic step classes to conquer the fear :)

Stay strong and you will come through this in the end. Concentrate on you and your little one as that's all that matters :) xx
 
Hi Jayne,
thanks for your post :)
interesting to read about your depression. this is one thing that concerns me. my mother infact this week forced me to make a doctors appointment to see about depression.
when my baby was 8 weeks old the health visitor did a standard questionnaire to check for post natal depression, i scored below average and they wanted to put me on meds. I knew that i was having a particularly down day that day and i said no, i would be fine. generally a lot of the time i have been fine, i have brilliant family and friends around me and whilst i havent felt strong a lot of the time, many people commented on how strong i was despite what i had been through. so i guess i was doing ok. i had been keeping very busy and being very social and out and about constantly and enjoying life. so really i was doing pretty well of course there were still days i cried at what had happened but on the whole doing good. however one thing that was really getting me down was my weight, and i was comfort eating and eating out of boredom. i think this didnt help my general mood. the past month or so however i have had a lot more down days and i was in a right state last weekend and that was when my mum insisted i see the doc abotu depression. my dad suffered from it for years and i dont know if its genetic but she wanted me to go anyway. so i went this morning and i explained everything to my doctor. she said that anyone who had been through what i had been through was bound to be feeling down but she didnt neccesarily think it was depression just a combination of everything. i told her i had started this diet and that i was feeling very positive and motivated about it and she said that was good. but there was no harm in trying the meds. she prescribed them anyway but i am reluctant. i do know that i will still have down days but on the whole, the main thing that had really been getting me right down was my weight and im starting to feel positive about that. i dont want to just take the meds just for the sake of it or just to please my mother. what do you think??

xx
 
It's a difficult one. Anti d's most definitely have their place, and (without meaning to be to morbid) I wouldn't have been on this earth without them during my darkest months. I was seriously floored though with it, I couldn't look after my children (my husband had to), and I didn't get out of bed for weeks at a time. Just moving was an effort. I had no interest or motivation for anything :( I don't know where it came from. I've never had depression before and pray to God I never get it again. The thought terrifies me!

I think if you can still see a way forward, and are interested in things, and have enjoyment in the things you used to enjoy, then you should see how things go for a while. It's true, you could very well be mildly depressed. You've been through a lot, and it's bound to take it's toll. But chances are at this level of depression you will come out of it in time by yourself. I find the medical profession can be quite quick at handing out anti d's and they come with their own set of problems in terms of side effects. I went through several types before finding one that suited me, but all of them either made me nauseous and/or incredibly drowsy through the initial few weeks of taking them. There were other personal side effects too.

Maybe take a look into what the side effects of the meds you've been prescribed could be. That's not to say you'd get any or all of them, but it's worth knowing first. I think the depression has to outweigh the discomfort of the side effects before they become worthwhile. Also they don't cure depression. You still kind of have to do that yourself and fight your way out, but they do help you find that fight when you can't see past the next 30 seconds and everything is very black.

I don't know, it's a difficult one. You have to do what's right for you though in terms of taking them or not. That said though, it's often our nearest and dearest who can see how ill we really are, when we maybe can't see it ourselves. I don't know you well enough to say take them or don't take them, but I would say to definitely give it some thought xx
 
HELP!!!

day 6/7 here - i started monday and this is sunday so i guess yeah its day 7. weigh in tomorrow morning. But i really struggled today and i ate this evening. I feel crap. today was the first day that i really really struggled with hunger. all the other days i have been 100% and drinking 3 litres of water some days 4 litres. and the hunger didnt bother me that much at all. today was really hard tho.. i was feeling dizzy, light headed, struggled to concentrate, stomach totally growling at me all day. no matter how much water i drank i still couldnt shake those feelings. I ended up eating tonight. my mum was doing a roast dinner and i had a few slices of roast beef, the tiniest potato and a yorkshire pudding.

I just dont know where my heads at. i had been 100% disciplined and strict with myself and then tonight i just thought "i have to eat something or im going to go insane."

I jsut dont know if i can do it. Its really really hard.

Help me!!

Ps altho i did weigh myself on my scales at home and had lost 8 lbs x

PPs and i got TOTM this morning so im not sure if maybe that has affected my moods and weakness levels
 
This diary has has lots of views but only a few replies. i dont really know what thats all about..is it cos im a newbie no one is commenting on my posts?? I am really needing the support at the minute, i could just cry right now.

But in all honesty you know i didnt even enjoy the food. and then i felt bad about it afterwards. and have not been craving again. so maybe i will be ok.

Will still go to weigh in tomorrow mornning, maybe after a good nights sleep i will be in a better frame of mind
 
hi , I am not on LT but am doing CD ( another TFR diet ) and done LT in the past so can relate !! You are doing so well , don't worry about the blip today , don't think about it , just get back on the wagon and let your 1st weigh in be your motivation :) I notice that you have been excersising ?? It is not really recommended to do hard cardio excersise on TFR diets as you just don't have enough calories , and this could be making you feel hungry and dizzy , and can even slow donw weight loss .. may be worth cutting back for a while

You have done so well so far , after everything you have gone through, you still have the motivation to do a TFR diet .. that should make you very proud of yourself :) You know you can do this and I am sure weigh in tomorrow will be fab ... good luck and make sure you let us know how you get on :)
 
Hiya Megan.. It can sometimes seem very hit and miss when people are in here, but please don't take it personally.. I am here now, so please feel free to shout/moan/whine/cry..

It is hard hun, but everything in life takes hard work and unfortunately this is no exception...

If it makes you feel better, i have been waiting for a pill that will make me a size 12 when i wake up tomorrow morning, and it has taken me ages to realise it's not coming!! lol

Please don't be too hard on yourself.. We all make mistakes, but put it to the back of your mind, and stay positive.. YOU CAN DO IT!!

You have been through a lot and you have come out the other side.. The same will happen with your weight loss.

I have my 1st weigh in tomorrow, and i will be coming back on here and checking how you got on, but i am sure you will be fine x
 
Hi Megan

I'm sorry I wasn't about earlier when you posted, and have only just looked at your diary. Sending you huge cyber ((hugs)).

It sounds like a whole combination of things have just crept up and bitten you on the backside. I know it's much easier said than done, but try now to put the eating behind you, go and get weighed, and get back on with the job in hand. You can't change that you ate, and beating yourself up about it will be wasted emotion and energy (that you don't have on 400 cals lol).

You may find yourself really hungry now tomorrow, so just get the water down you and grit your teeth. Imagine you're at that point in an intense workout where you feel you just cannot go on and you want to stop, you're going to stop, but you focus and then you find that little bit of inner strength to carry you through to the end, and oh boy does that feel good afterwards :D

You CAN do this Megan. Go for it! :)

xx
 
I think most people view these diaries as a place where people 'go' to rant or post personal things to remember themselves, so you may not get as many posts - don't take it personally!

Don't beat yourself up about tonight, and good luck for you first weigh in; the results will help your motivation!!
 
This diary has has lots of views but only a few replies. i dont really know what thats all about..is it cos im a newbie no one is commenting on my posts?? I am really needing the support at the minute, i could just cry right now.

Dont take it to heart, if you look at ANY diary, in any section they ALL have tons more reads than posts, its just the nature of it. You can be the most established member or the newest its just the same. Its no reflection on you - or your diary - honest x
 
hey megan
im sure that totm has increased your want to eat something as i know it does does make me want to eat.
you got to day 7 without a problem so pick yourself up and shake yourself and just start again you cannot change yesterday so dont let it affect tomorrow. come on hun we are all here for you and totally supportive you will get through this tough day x x x x
 
morning everyone. will do a quick reply now. i am feeling a lot this morning altho completely shattered despite being in bed early. But def in a better frame of mind. going to the pharmacy now shortly to get weighed and i will post a reply in a while and let you know how i got on...

thanks everyone for your kind words :)
 
Hi everyone.
Well according to the pharmacist i lost 8lbs this week. I am very pleased with that result. even tho on my scales this morning i was 2lb lighter than what the pharmacist weighed me, but then that was with no clothes on first thing this morning. i must remember not to do that again as it can be disheartening.

Thanks everyone for your replies. i had worked myself up into a right state last night over this. but today is a new day. I am excited to keep going. i just have to grit my teeth and keep going.

i did have one personal training session last week which was quite hard altho it wasnt cardio it was more weights. other than that i walked once and swam once. I havent been over doing it with the exercise and i get that being on this diet is not enough calories to exercise.. but logic in my head says, if ur in ketosis then surely you DO have enough energy to exercise because the energy comes from stored fat?? just wondering about that, as someone had commeneted about me doing exercise. altho yes i do think it was probably that, and the fact that i got TOTM that really made me want to eat yesterday.

But still its a new day and im pleased with my first week loss so i have to keep going. This week i am getting weighed on friday so that will only be 4-5 days worth but its cos i want to change it to every friday because of my working hours.

My start weight was 16st 12lb. today i am 16st 4lb. i really hope to be 16 by friday.
 
you can exercise on tfr but they say not for the first week x x
 
thanks so hopeful, no one told me that and i figured i would be ok but not to worry.
 
Well done on your weight loss Megan :)

A lot of us seem to have Monday as a weigh in day.

I have been told the same as so so hopefull, that i was not to exercise the 1st week, but now i am in the 2nd week, it is still not appealing!! lol

I am sure you will get to 16 by the end of the week.. It is working well, so keep it up x x
 
Hi Megan :)

Woohoo to 8lb off! Yay, that is BRILLIANT :D

So pleased you are feeling better today as well hun. I think that it was just a combination of things that got to you yesterday and TOTM def won't help!

Here's to week 2 :D

xx
 
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