member with different name

sophia-jo

Silver Member
(just posted on VLCD should have been here!)

Hi guys & girls

I'm a regular memeber under a different name as i don't want peopke to know who i am!!!

I've had a terrible arguement with my husband A while ago & have done something really stupid but i need to talk to someone. i suffer with depression & am what they call a cutter. I feel so low & have just cut myself to pieces & drank half a bottle of after shock & my OH doesn't really know how bad i'm feeling at the moment...

I've just logged on 7 to top it all have recieved a e-mail form my dads cousin (someone that i think abuse me when i was a child) I feel even worst now & just want to end this feeling. i can't tell my oh about the e-mail coz he'll think it's just an excuse & to make him feel guilty...

So sorry to go on but i need to get my feeeling out!..x

omg Levi, do you have councilling for your cutting? It sounds like you have been through some tough times. How are you feeling right now? Have you put down your tools????
 
are you there levi????
 
You can't keep bottling your feelings up; it'll only end up with you feeling so pent up you'll feel compelled to cut again.

Have you spoken to a doctor? Is there any chance of counselling via your GP? You sounds as if you have a lot of hurt that needs to be expressed.

Even if you aren't getting professional help at the moment, you can always vent on here ... we might not be able to 'counsel' you but we can listen and offer shoulders to cry on.

Sending hugs your way
 
babes
whatever you are thinking you can say it on here
we wont judge you, we will listen and support WHATEVER it is
dont hurt yourself anymore tonight, you are to precious OK
let it out , we are listening
nat xx
 
yes, deffo come on here hun, we will do all we can to help you.

No one would have to know about the councilling...If I were you I would go to your GP and talk with them about it...or even call Samaratins...they may have a direct line to councillers who are trained in dealing with your cutting. If you have issues with your child hood darlin then you should address them with a professional councilor....You poor thing, I just want to give you a big hug.

Please thing bout seeing someone Levi....you never know...you may find it actually helps you and you wont know unless you give it a try. you owe it to yourself to get some help, you deserve the help sweetie.

how are you feeling now Levi???
 
its ok
you are not alone in having awful thigs in your past
just try to remember that its the future that matters
dont let those b*stards ruin your life!!!
sweetheart your are worth more than that
 
I saw a counsellor many years ago. He was useless & made me feel worst. so i was also hypontise (SP) to look back into the past thats when i discovered i was abused by one of my dads cousins. the problem was the lid wasopened & never put back on!!! I have this outward personality that no one ever guesses i have prolems of my own 7 i aways seem to sorting there's our for them. sorry if my spelling is a bit bad i have had half a bottle of after shock!!..lol xxx

oh, I see....well hun, I know first hand that there are crap councillors out there but wouldnt mind betting that there are some fantastic ones too. Would you try again??
 
Hi Levi

I hope you are feeling a little less stressed.

Counselling does help- but you need the right counsellor bit like Cambridge diet really.......

Theres someting called Dialectical behavioral therapy which has been found helpful in treating cutters.

Here's a really useful self help website :


Self-Help

How are your cuts ?

Luke
 
Yes it's all gone! was gonna go over tesco buy it's closed! Just aswel really!!....xxx

Where is your husband Levi??

Don't you feel like you could talk to him about this?? We are all here for you but I'm concerned that you don't have anyone physically with you .
 
to be honest i'm too scared just incase mor worms are let out..xx

That's understandable darlin....but how often do you get like this??
 
to be honest i'm too scared just incase mor worms are let out..xx

Any decent counsellor wouldn't swamp you by expecting you to deal with every problem you've ever had on one big rush. The process takes as long as it needs.

The thing with bottling it all up is that it's like putting a sticking plaster over a bad wound ... on the surface it may look OK but underneath it's festering and becoming worse.

Please consider talking to a doctor - they can't force you to do anything but may suggest something that would help you to overcome this situation.

As for your abuser ... the best form of revenge is to survive. Don't let the past ruin your future xx
 
No coz i've always kept it too myself. The only person that is awre is my hubby & he's gone to bed now in a mood with me, we're not on talking terms at all ( only the second time since we've been married) I tried to hint to my mum about the abuse but she wasn't having a barr of it & i don't want to hurt her's or my dad's feeelings as i don't really remember much only snipit's...xxx

aaaw sweet heart..... can't you go in to him and tell him how you are feeling....surely if he knew he would help you and forget your argument...

About your Mum and Dad, maybe the hint wasnt strong enough, and as much as you don't want to hurt their feelings what would hurt them more.???? knowing that you have kept this to yourself for all these years?? That would surely hurt them more. maybe you could try again...maybe be a little more direct about it, when you are feeling stronger you may be able to broach the subject easier.

I'm not a councillor and am not trying to be but I think that you need all the support and help from your family that you can get, and I imagine if they knew what you have been through and what you are currently going through then they will be there for you 100%
 
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