Cerulean
Silver Member
And it came from the person I predicted it would come from. I smiled and assured her I would know when to stop. What she was really saying was 'Don't get thinner than me'.
I actually find it quite inappropriate - we aren't exactly chummy and I don't like the way she does it (sort of in theatrical whispers).
I never comment or pass comment on people's appearances - I find it the height of bad manners to be honest - I hate people who pick threads and fluff off clothes without asking because it feels intrusive - I was brought up in quite an old fashioned 'don't discuss religion, politics or make personal remarks' kind of way (obviously I do with my close friends - but I have very definite boundaries) it actually causes me some problems in group because one of my group finds it appropriate to comment and pass judgement about what I (and other people) should and shouldn't do and also the group really focuses on what I wear and how I look and I find it quite uncomfortable (one of them said 'you won't be able to wear that next week, and you only bought it a few weeks ago' I am perfectly aware of what does and does not fit me, enough with the personal remarks! - I know they mean well and I don't want to p** on their parades - but I guess I might have to have a discussion about boundaries in the next couple of weeks because I would rather that than come close to snapping at the 'inquisitors' like I did in group last week. Instead I've been shutting down because I really don't want my personal life to be an open book. I don't talk about my relationship with my sort of ex other than with my sort of ex or my dreams and ambitions other than the people I know to trust with them. - I am a very private person - but people confuse my warmth and openess with someone who wants to reveal their innermost secrets.
This sounds a bit negative, I know - but that comment today made me really think about the lines I like to draw around my life and standing up for myself.
Do you mind the comments that people make about you? Do you revel in it or shrink away?
I actually find it quite inappropriate - we aren't exactly chummy and I don't like the way she does it (sort of in theatrical whispers).
I never comment or pass comment on people's appearances - I find it the height of bad manners to be honest - I hate people who pick threads and fluff off clothes without asking because it feels intrusive - I was brought up in quite an old fashioned 'don't discuss religion, politics or make personal remarks' kind of way (obviously I do with my close friends - but I have very definite boundaries) it actually causes me some problems in group because one of my group finds it appropriate to comment and pass judgement about what I (and other people) should and shouldn't do and also the group really focuses on what I wear and how I look and I find it quite uncomfortable (one of them said 'you won't be able to wear that next week, and you only bought it a few weeks ago' I am perfectly aware of what does and does not fit me, enough with the personal remarks! - I know they mean well and I don't want to p** on their parades - but I guess I might have to have a discussion about boundaries in the next couple of weeks because I would rather that than come close to snapping at the 'inquisitors' like I did in group last week. Instead I've been shutting down because I really don't want my personal life to be an open book. I don't talk about my relationship with my sort of ex other than with my sort of ex or my dreams and ambitions other than the people I know to trust with them. - I am a very private person - but people confuse my warmth and openess with someone who wants to reveal their innermost secrets.
This sounds a bit negative, I know - but that comment today made me really think about the lines I like to draw around my life and standing up for myself.
Do you mind the comments that people make about you? Do you revel in it or shrink away?