::mOd-kArEn79's DiArY::

rubbish and lazy day food wise. wasn't organised and was really busy at work. will try and have some fruit later.

thursday 6th december 2011

breakfast: hi-fi bar (B)

lunch: tinned vegetable ravioli (2 syns)

dinner: pesto (12 syns) pasta with olives (1 syn) and cheese (A)

snacks: hi-fi (B), clementine

syns: 15
 
Pesto is 12 Syns??????

Karen and Lou we have decided to take your advice and starting SW 100% on Monday and saving FF for if we really need it later on. Thank you both so much for your advice x
 
it is if you let your boyfriend serves you up 250g of pasta with it already stirred in!!!! it probably wasn't 12 syns, but fresh pesto is about 3 sysn per tbsp.

i'm looking forward to seeing your loss :)
 
had such a sh*t day today. took my dad to hospital where he was told there's an 87% chance he won't survive the 2 hour procedure to freeze the cancerous tumour on his kidney due to his weak heart and kidneys. we're all really upset and now have to wait AGAIN for them to write back to our hospital to say they're refusing to do the op. :( i'm desperately hoping there is something else they can do!

....obviously my appetite isn't very good but i refuse to come off plan!

friday 7th december 2011

breakfast: hi-fi bar (B)

lunch: hi-fi bar (B)

dinner: 2 small jacket potatoes and cheese (2 x A's)

snacks: 4 oreos (10 syns)

syns: 10
 
Hi hun, thinking of you... can't find the right words to say to you, but your Dad is very lucky to have such a supportive daughter, good work with keeping to plan as well hun, I'd be stuffing my face in times like this. xxx
 
to be honest i've lost my appetite. i'm hungry but don't feel like eating. i want to try and break my emotional eating habits.... my mum and dad ate a danish straight after being told and i sat their feeling sick! they then had fish and chips from the chippy for dinner. i'm glad he hasn't lost his appetite, but he did say it hasn't really sank in for him! i don't want to go to sleep tonight as i know i'm gonna be tossing and turning all night :(
 
Oh Karen that's awful news. As Lou said, there's nothing to be said, just that we are all here for you to sound off to. Although you have no appetite try to get some of the basics down you, you must stay healthy and strong x
 
Queenie24 said:
Hi Karen, so sorry to hear about your Dad, I truly hope the surgery has positive outcomes.
Click to expand...

they refused to operate as there's a 87% he will die during the op! :(
 
who knows what the day will bring food-wise. been awake since 9am and haven't eaten yet. had a few breakdowns though! i've also been a complete B*TCH to my boyfriend - giving him lots of grief and trying to cause a massive arguments. obviously some kind of f*cked up coping mechanism for me! can see how people end up splitting up when things like this happen!

have planned to go out for a drink later tonight with my friend but don't really feel like it. will decide a bit later.

saturday 8th december 2011

brunch: 3 cauldron Lincolnshire sausages on w/m bread with ketchup (2.5 syns + 2 x B)

dinner: uncle bens Chinese rice (2.5 syns), Quorn crispy fillet (3.5 syns), sweetcorn, mange tout, babycorn and mushrooms

snacks:

syns: 8.5
 
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You can only take these things 1 day at a time Hun, I sure your fella understands that you've got a lot going on.

Q
 
just wanted to say thanks to everyone for your kind words of support. im a stranger to most of you but you've take time to try and make me feel a little bit better. you're all thoughtful lovely people. xxx

i went out last night with my friend who is in a worse situation than me. her mum and dad are unwell, her friend just died and her hearts just been broken. not sure how she's managing to function. the night was ok - was nice to escape reality for a few hours..... then the night ended with her crying in the car for an hour. that was ok but then she started talking about my dad, which upset me. i didnt want to talk about it :/ i know she was trying to be supportive, but im exhausted!
 
sunday 9th january 2011

brunch: baked beans on w/m toast (2 x B)

dinner: 2 x low fat supernoodles with quorn and mushrooms

snacks: 4 Oreos (10), babybel lights (A), 2 Ritz (2 syns)

syns: 12 syns
 
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Sometimes it helps to talk but only if YOU want to! I know when I had some issues people tried to force me into talking and it irritated me so much. All you need is people there ready when you want that ear x
 
Taz said:
Sometimes it helps to talk but only if YOU want to! I know when I had some issues people tried to force me into talking and it irritated me so much. All you need is people there ready when you want that ear x
Click to expand...

Exactly. I was happy to talk at the start of the night which we did, but then I wanted to leave it at that. I had to go to bed with it fresh in my mind and woke in a foul mood. Everyone at work are leaving me alone as I sent them an email saying what was happening and if I wanted to talk I would approach them, but then I met the admin worker in a bar last nite and he started saying he'd been through similar with his grandad and if needed to talk, etc.... a night out is such the wrong time and place to bring it up :\
 
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