Ok missy, no need to doubt yourself look at what you have done so far. CD works, you just have to 100% it. Once you add in extras, it becomes a slippery slope and doubt creeps in. You want this too much to cheat and you deserve to have what you want so STOP making it so hard on yourself and start it the easier way... 100%
Sorry for the tough love hun but I know you are strong enough to do this and look fantastic for your trip home xxx big hugs