My metamorphosis log - final stage

Hope your shift went well, and understanding what triggers unwanted off plan eating is a great start. I too also congratulate you on a Size 10 dress - brilliante!!!
 
Hi Lorna - I love reading your diary, you write really well.

Firstly, well done on the size 10 dress!! I love wrap dresses - did you get yours in a high street shop? If so, would you mind telling me where you got it as I'd like another one!

I can so understand your argument with your DH. I have had the same "discussion" with mine many times. He was brought up very differently from me and seem to think that it's all about quantity and doesn't seem to have the first idea about the nutritional qualities of food (his parents are the same). My children get praised at their grandparents house for eating 3 sausages, when quite frankly at their age 1 sausage would be sufficient (and would leave room for potatoes and veg!).

Having said that, your DH has a point in that if she is not well any food would do her well as she needs her strength. It's one of those times where you are both right (although Mums are always a bit more right) depending on how you look at it. I've had to learn to let go of a few my principles since becoming co-parents (oh what a modern word LOL) with DH as we have different views on a lot of things. I decide most things but have realised that not doing it my way sometimes won't ruin the children :rolleyes:.

As for your post-row binge - it was pathetic. 8 yoghurt coated raisins!!! Honestly I could teach you a thing or two:D:D:D

Oh and as far as the cleaning thing is concerned - Bess' hoover idea is brilliant and I've used it many times! Also, your DD is 3 years old - If she can walk she can hoover!! My children are regularly running around the house with wipes (they clean with baby wipes) and feather dusters and my son probably does more hoovering than I do:eek:. I'm not sure whether I should say that with pride or with shame...

My children earn points that they can trade for money or Playstation time - they have been doing this since they were about 2 years old (although when they were really little they worked for a box of raisins :D). They dust, hooever, empty the dishwasher, put the washing on (I do the detergent bit), lay the table, make beds, clean the bathroom (except the toilet) and scrub the floor. There's no way my DS is going to grow up to become one of those young men who has never used a washing machine. :D

Anyway - sorry for writing an essay! I've been off line for a few days and I've had Mini withdrawals :p
 
14.11.09
Back again, much to my dismay.....Much rather be tucked up in bed still sleeping. Got to sleep about 10, but been awake since about 2.30, can't get back to sleep and have raging headache. Only just started doing 2 shifts together again, and just can't get used to having to sleep for longer periods.
Thanks for all your support guys-
Things ok with OH now, just let it drop and never spoke of it again. Looking back i know i over-reaacted (a bit) and it was probably about being annoyed with other things as well as the eating issue. On the up side, she seems a bit better today, and has eaten better. Still no veg, but no junk.
I know my binge wasn't the worse i could have done, but just peeved me as i had really intended a 100% week to really see what 810 can do for me. I do just love those raisins, they are the blueberry dusted yoghurt coated ones fron julian graves and they are delicious, in fact....i was quite restrained to not eat the whole packet!
Have woke up to find OH cleaning, as quite right too, hes off sick at the moment and has loads of time to do things and is still very capable- so not too bothered by it all now. I try to get DD to help, but she is normally a bit of a hinderance with her unique style of tidying!
I do waffle when writing stuff- I'm always the one guilty of writing essays in patient files at work and care plans that are so explicit it takes 10mins to read them, drives everyone mad i'm sure. I know i can be quite irrelevent sometimes but my mind will bounce around a bit and go off topic, writing it down stops me reaching for naughty foods! Finding it really useful to keep a log, and read others, although i do probably spend a lot of time doing this and very liitle else! (need to learn to speedtype!) Glad to see you about Alli, hope you and yours are all feeling better now.
Back for more waffle later. Have questions to ponder about maintenance-
  • is anbody doing low GI or GL diets as well as calorie counting? I'm thinking that a combination of the two would be ideal but not sure how it will work out-and how best to effectively combine the two? Are there any tools which also look into the GL/GI rating of foods along with all the usual nutritional stuff?
Anyway, off to lounge in bed for an hour and read! xx
 
14.11.09
is anbody doing low GI or GL diets as well as calorie counting? I'm thinking that a combination of the two would be ideal but not sure how it will work out-and how best to effectively combine the two? Are there any tools which also look into the GL/GI rating of foods along with all the usual nutritional stuff?
Anyway, off to lounge in bed for an hour and read! xx

Yes, I'm trying to. Trying being the operative word. Got a very good low GI book, Patrick Halford ( Holford?) I think. Would like to learn more about it too.

On the daughter and food issue - not such a big deal really, but Mum's are mostly right of course!! :D



Hi Lorna - I love reading your diary, you write really well.


My children earn points that they can trade for money or Playstation time - they have been doing this since they were about 2 years old (although when they were really little they worked for a box of raisins :D). They dust, hooever, empty the dishwasher, put the washing on (I do the detergent bit), lay the table, make beds, clean the bathroom (except the toilet) and scrub the floor. There's no way my DS is going to grow up to become one of those young men who has never used a washing machine. :D
:p

Quite right too, although I'm mainly the home maker I've always felt that a man should be able to feed and care for his children albeit in his own way. All for child labour too, ours have had their own 'jobs' since they could walk.
Emptying the dishwasher, putting away the washing, feeding the dogs, hoovering, ironing (when older.) etc etc. I think that everyone should help out in a family. Mind you, I have one little darling who seems to have avoided quite a lot of work because she works long hours and has an overactive social life, but now she's finished all her exams there's no excuse any more and I don't think her sisters will let her get away with it for much longer!

I love reading the things you write as well Lorna, so interesting, like Alli's!
 
Am also on nights Butterfly, so feel your pain!
Hope you have a decent shift x
 
Back again,

Hope your shift going ok sleepybird!

Bess, been doing a fair bit of reading aroung GI/GL. Got several books which i am wading through. Love the principles of GI and it just seems to make sense to try it as a maintenance plan, hopefully help reduce the hunger pangs which turn into binges! Also in terms of a healthy plan for the family etc.
The Rick Gallop family GI book is a really good intro, and i'm yet to getthe Holstein one but it looks good. I'm reading 'the 7-day GL diet' by Nigel Denby. He highlights the flaws in GI, in that it is not always correlated to portion size, so in this respect I am preferring the sound of GL way of eating, but there is just not as much info out there about it. Think may need to just figure it out myself as i go along.
My cdc advised me of a simple calculation to do to figure if a food is low GI or not, so you can apply it to convenience foods. Basically she said you look at the carb amount, and for it to be low GI the 'of sugars' amount has to be less than 20%. In addition you would aim for less than 4% fats, and calories just to stay within the range you wanted for that meal. She showed me how to do this on a label and it was so easy. For example:
if total carbs........14.2g (move the decimal point across= 1.4g, double it=2.8g)
of sugars...................2.1g (this item would therfore be low GI as it is below 2.8)
It sounds quite simple, I hope its right! I was just hoping that there would be a tracker of some sort where you could keep track of things too. Am not at the point of needing one yet, but will have to check out the trials to see if any do this.
Hell, maybe i'm just getting to worked up about it, i can read till the cows come home, its still not going to do it for me. I just want to do this so much, i want to feel as prepered as possible for the challenge ahead.
Feeling very much in control again right now, and loving it. have seen a move on the scales since WI on Wed. (possibly 2lb!!??) So that helps keep me on track. I am a scale hopper, at least once a day. Find it has helped me to realise how much 'damage' a binge can do sometimes. Not that it'll stop me doing it again, but will think twice about letting it continue more than a day!Food: Quorn thing as yesterday, split into two again ( made a load!) still yummy! Still to have my shake and half bar. Exercise:Doing pilates on my break at work. Just need to throw a bit of cardio in somewhere.
Getting bit miffed with the team i'm in - only me and one other post on a regular basis, i'm team leader and try hardest to recruit and keep support up but some people just don't bother. Makes me want to give it in sometimes, especially now i'm on here, and all you guys are so lovely. We'll see... I'll drop it when i get to goal anyway i think.
Enough waffle, off to read diarys. xx
 
GL Butterfly? Glycemic load? What does it mean? Great post, need to read it again later when I've got more time.
 
Heyy!
Thanks for sending me the link to the meal ideas! You're doing so well :) I need to get started on the exercise now xxx
 
15.11.09
Been busy today so not had chance to catch up, and off to bed soon so can't hang around- not that i'm tired.
To try to clarify Bess:
For scientists to measure the GI rating of a food they take an amount of the food in question which would give you 50g of carbohydrate. ie. 2 slices of bread give you 50g carbs. They feed this to volunteers, then measure how their blood glucose raises over time to calculate the Gi rating (sugar at 100 is the comparison for all). Sounds fine, except it does not account for portion sizes of a 'normal' intake. For example, when they test carrots, it actually takes 1.5lb of carrots to give you 50g of carbs, and the GI result for this is 75 (high), but who on earth would possibly eat this amount! GL (glycaemic loading) has examined this and re-rated foods according to portion sizes which are recommended.
I am only just looking into this, and i am suspecting that most GI literature has already taken this into account as i can't find a book that lists carrots as high! The book i've got reckons it simple to follow and does not mean countless hrs of weighing/ measuring once you get the hang of it, which pleases me no end! They have a website too apparently, dietfreedom.co.uk, which i am yet to look at.
Just finding it fascinating reading so far, helps me to focus on the changes longer term, not that having the knowledge will do it for me. Reckon i'll just do a mish mash of it all in the end knowing me....!
Food: Want to lie, but can't... bad day, no 'meal'. Not enough water. Tasted when making mincemeat, jam and lamb casserole. Absolutely no excuses, just no willpower. But on a positive note: Exercise: bike ride for the first time in years, felt so wobbly, but really enjoyed it. Was getting dark so it was a quick scoot around our local bike paths, but better than nothing, and i loved it, which suprised me.
Off to bed, taking my nibling head with me, but going to leave it there in the morning, new day, new start. ( i figure i should just work 24/7 to stop me facing temptation!) xx
 
16.11.09
Argghhh!, need to remind myself why i want to shift this weight and giving myself a boot up the bum. Horrid nibble head got up with me, at a stupid hr (thanks to DD) and has consumed a small pile of raisins as i added some to DDs brekky. WTF is going on.....! i've never even been a big raisin fan, (although this could easily change now;))
Really miffed at myself, and trying to get my head round why i am sabotaging my efforts now, when i want to be feeling more in control? Its almost like the more i like myself in the mirror the more i am screwing up. I don't want to fail, so why let my 'i want to eat' head win. I have, and can stop this and make the choice not to have what i want, it just feels hard sometimes, and then i get weak... I wouldn't mind but i am paying for it- my stomach is so uncomfortable again now. Think i may also be a bit bunged up which doesn't help. So in short, not a happy bunny, :cry: but its my own fault and this is my attempt to kick myself back into that virtuous state of a few days ago. How can your 'control' change in just a short space of time....? God, i wish i'd never got fat in the first place. Off to play with DD. xx
 
Try not to be so hard on yourself, it doesn't help... sometimes makes it worse, if it triggers a panic or a self-disgust mindset... you are doing brilliantly Butterfly & I don't think there are any of us who haven't wobbled at the last stages towards goal... it IS much harder, the closer we get, no question. Your body too is starting to shout loudly that it would like some FOOD so the things it was easy to ignore on SS are no longer so simple to blank out.

Almost there, hun, and then you can work up the steps and fruit will be allowed... you can do it, you really can.

xxx
 
Completely understand, just plod on, plod, plod, plod. x
 
Agree with all the clever people above this post - you are doing fab! Make a mental note to keep up with the water intake and keep writing how you are doing and what you are feeling - it does all help x
 
Almost can't bring self to post, i'm too embarrassed by my stupidity, as i have continued to nibble..... But, not feeling as horrible about it all which is good, just need to accept that this is just part of the process in a sense, and learn from it. Your all so right, (of course) and i must try to stop beating myself up. Just need to get back into the swing again. Funny how moving to 810 has just thrown me. Its like a bit of me is screaming 'yay...you can eat now!' and ignoring the fact that i am still following a specific plan. It makes such a difference to just know that others feel the same, that its not just me who is a slave to my cravings! (but honestly....jam, mincemeat and raisins....how bloody wierd! At least theres a hint of low GI there and i haven't given in to a major binge of junk food) Food: Tried to be good, despite everything else, cos need to learn how to eat properly again. Chicken breast stuffed with grated courgette/mushroom/cottage cheese and herbs/spices, with a small spoon of stirfry veg. Lovely, and even OH enjoyed it. It was lovely to cook something we could both eat. I also really love the fact that i couldn't see a speck of fat on my plate, and yet i enjoyed it so much. Felt like a litle breakthrough in a sense, actually really enjoying simple healthy food, in small portions too.
Had about 2-3l water, going to have a bit more now. Exercise: none. Walked around shops....:eek:. Had visitors am. and out for meeeting with OH's work pm. so little chance.
Off to watch flashforward- i love it! Catch up tomorrow xx
 
Where are you Lorna? You ok?
Don't worry about the nibbling, it's something we have all done and as you say all linked up with the excitement of eating 'normal food.' You'll be fine, you haven't overdone it. It's just trying to get used to a different way of eating and learning different habits to the ones we've all had for years and years. Not easy but we are all here to support each other. xx
 
17.11.09
Hi again, I'm fine thanks Bess. Just been busy. Had a lie in this morning till 930am....it was divine! I rarely either get the opportunity or physically can sleep much past 8 so it felt wonderful. Then it was a few jobs, play with DD, then off to work 12-8, but not back till later.
Have popped to sainsburys, as off out early for day tomorrow to have xmas shop day with mom. Browsed the sale rail, as usual, and managed to pick up trousers, 2 tops and jumper, all for £17! God i love a bargain. even better the trousers were another size10!! :D I just cannot believe how good it feels to wander into a shop and pick up clothes off the rail, and not have to discount 90% of what you try on cos i look too fat, or its too tight, its just a dream i never thought would be possible.

I am, however discovering a downside of my weight loss......my boobs..or lack of..:cry:It seems that its the one place in my body that just will not stop shrinking. I want to carry on a bit, cos want to lose a bit more off my thighs/bum especially, but my boobs are paying the price. I breastfed DD for 2 yrs and probably didn't wear correct fitting bras, which didn't help. So they have always pointed a bit south, and sagged a fair bit but i could live with that. I have always said i didn't feel i'd ever have a boob job, and i probably still won't, but i would now think a bit harder before discounting it...:rolleyes:! They're just like flaps of skin with nipples now, I am looking for a new bra, needs to be low cut but give lift, to go with this new dress. Tried a load on the other day (guessed at a 36A) and i barely fill them. My little flaps just sit on the bra, like on a shelf, all sad and lonely....:(. So, part of my shopping expedition is to brave a proper fitting, and buy decent bra and huge chicken fillets.....I've never used them before, and knowing my luck they will drop out into the font at the christening but i need desperate measures. Even my brother commented i had nothing left upstair - cheeky sod!
Food: True to form, back at work and able to be good! had tuna mixed with cottage cheese and herbs, salad leaves and balsamic dressing. Probably had more balsamic than i should but i love it- it the 'balsamic glaze' from asda and its just lush! Just about to munch my mousse as a late snack before hitting the sack.Exercise: none. Just ran out of time, which p's me off as i was beginning to enjoy it too. More hrs in the day please....?
May not get chance to catch up tomorrow, but will try. I get withdrawals...... and i miss catching up on everyone. xx
 
Butterfly, re: boobs... I was a bit the same, OH was a bit sad-faced towards the end of 810. Then as I started to introduce carbs as I went up the steps, things filled out again a little... I also gained a slight covering of 'fat' where once only ribs had been... I think other people on here call it carb-roundness or something. It doesn't mean you put on weight, but get a slightly rounder look and fill out in certain places if that makes sense?

So... don't panic. Bet it happens to you too!

xxx
 
Morning Butterfly!
Gotta love the size 10 trousers! that's fab!
Poor you on the boob front, i know mine deflated loads they looked empty, the bestthing i did was go to bravissimo for a proper fitting, turned out i was buying wrong size, didn't make them grow obviously but once in the bra they look much better. and now i know my size properly.
I love balsamic on my salad too, so much in fact it took over frommayo which used to be a staple for me unil i discovered balsamic...yum!

Wishing you a lovely day today!

xx
 
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