Hi So this is my story. I don't think it is an unusual one and has no great drama but it does speak of why I find myself, aged 41 and 17 stone. I was raised in a working class family and we were poor; like, properly poor with no money for food some days. We never went without but it meant that meals were Carb heavy to fill us up. Not surprisingly we ate what was infront of us; all of it, whether we were full or not - in fact, I truly never thought about whether I was hungry or not until I started Cambridge in 2009. My appetite for Carb rich food continued into adulthood where my interests and hobbies were more of the sedentary type and not surprisingly I gained weight at an alarming rate. I was a size 20 by age 28 and found that each time I went shopping for clothes, I would come back with 3 or 4 books instead (one size fits all you see ). I therefore became very well read but also quite fat. I tried WW and did ok, did SW and also did ok but stopped thinking about moderating my food intake when my mum died in 2002. In the 10 years since her death, I have got married and had 2 kids, the youngest one being 4 now. I started Cambridge after she was born. I did fab; starting at 17st6lbs and finishing at 12st. I felt great. But, when people complimented me on my weight loss I also heard criticism of my previous fat self. One friend even said "you look really good now, don't let yourself get fat again". I didn't do the maintenance plan and the weight piled up again. There has been a few extenuating circumstances in the last 4 years, I had back surgery and.wqs bed bound for 3 months and on heavy pain killers and anti-convulsant meds as pain relief for a while. Also my son has been really poorly and had lots of investigations - all ok now - and I became happy just eating. I realised about 4 weeks ago that I had bought books when I had been shopping for jeans. I laughed at myself and thought that I need to address this again. So, CWP again day 6 at the minute and going to use this to externalise all the stupid self-sabotaging thoughts thqt serve only to lure me from the path. If you read this far, thank you. Hopefully my updates will help keep me focussed.