O/T - is life ever simple?

[Tracybackinuk]

Hi Fern, I didn't see your original message, but have just read this. Unfortunately, the mental health service is under-resourced, so it is unlikely that he will be sectioned on the basis of a threat to kill himself (I think). I feel very very sorry for you and your family having to live with this. Sending hugs and best wishes, Tracy xx PS. I hope you are an auntie soon!!

 

[Littleslimmingbee]

fern - i don't know if this is a silly idea or not.. but... could you put your brother in the car with you all when you take your sister to hospital so he thinks he's just going for that? then when you get him there take him straight to a+e and demand to see someone who deals with this ASAP as you believe he's a danger to himself?

i really hope he gets the help he needs, and your sister has a quick and pain-free labour! x

I did think of that, but i just know that i could end up taking him and they may not do anything.. then if he realises he may run again, and im on my own here today as my mum has left to go to my sister. im waiting for CAMHS to turn up, think ist a councilling this for kids with mental helth probs, we'v insisted they take him when tehy get here but im feeling really alone today, and have no one to turn to. my elder brother is working and my sister is in labour, my Oh is at work miles away and my best friend is at work to. Im here, and he's upstairs, and now i ahve to sit here all day and babysit him. Im not really sure what to do.

 

[Beki]

oh hun (((((big hugs))))) - do you have any idea what time the CAMHS is due to turn up? maybe you could give them a ring to hurry them up?

thinking of you xx

 

[Littleslimmingbee]

CAMHS Came, and then they left. All a waste of time.


guess we shall just carry on till the next suicide attempt or the next time he dissapears.

thank you for all your help guys. My brother has come over now after leaving work early and my uncle is coming down on thursday for a few days to make life a little easier as i cannot miss anymore college/work. xx

 

[JestersTear]

It sounds to me as though Paul needs a lot of support and help.
How old is Paul? (sorry, I have no read the first thread on this)

It is not selfish to want a simple life at all *hug* although i suspect paul wants that as well.
As someone who has been so low as to consider taking their own life in the past, please take it from me that from Paul's point of view it is not selfish behaviour. Likely as not, he feels so bad that he just wants to end his own hurt and the only way he knows to do that is to remove himself from this world.

It is only now, years later, that I look back and realise how selfish I was being and how much hurt I must have caused my family. If they had told me this at the time, it wouldn't have helped me, it would have just made me feel like everyone's lives would be better without me in the world.

 

[mrsmac247]

Glad to hear that your brother has returned safe and well, i hope he will eventually get the help he needs sooner rather than later. Good luck to your sister as well x

 

[Donnie46]

Fern it is not wrong to wish for a simplier life - you are too young yourself to have all this burden resting on your shoulders especially as you have worked so hard to get your own life back on track.

I hate to say this but Paul will do what he wants to do no matter how carefully you watch and guard him and you cannot do anymore than you are already doing, this threatened suicide attempt is probably a cry for help, and if you could only get SS and the hospital more involved then he should be sectioned for his his own safety and health, but no matter what may happen Fern you cannot carry the blame, you are doing all that you can do as well as being being a 'prop' for your mother and your pregnant sister.

I am sending you huge hugs and hoping that things work out soon, and good luck with the birth of the baby - maybe a new life in the family is what your brother needs to focus on...I am praying all goes well with you all.

Love and best wishes to you all. X

 

[Starlight]

Paul was found at 12pm last night and brang home. despite earlier promises form police to detain and section. they brang him home and left.
Sisters contractions quite close now, so she will be going to the hospital soon.

Something theyre probably as frustrated about as you are I cant tell you how often Ive had car crews sit literally for hours and hours and hours at a hospital for someone to be assessed, someone clearly with problems, only for the CPN etc to say theyre fine and not getting detained. And it ends up 2 totally frustrated officers have no option but to take them home and leave them in the care of their family. Its a shocking system

 

[Littleslimmingbee]

it is. How far does it all ahve to go untill somthing is done? There are just so may others like paul out there though, and a minute number actually get help. it makes me so sad, not even just for my brother.

 

[ilovelife]

money talks!

 

[Starlight]

money talks!

In what way??

 

[Littleslimmingbee]

Quite! if only my money tree would grow faster..

 

[Julianne_julz]

Hey Fern, Sorry to hear you're having a tough time, I feel silly for having my rant this morning now. Hope everything works out for your brother and the rest of yuor family. Hope you get to meet your niece/nephew soon!! How exciting! xx

 

[Coley]

Hi Fern....

Glad your brother is ok!

I'm a student mental health nurse...and I wouldn't wish being detained on anyone. You haven't been in the wards.

I would urge Paul to go to his GP and they can refer him to the appropriate services if they feel that is what is needed...and if that is what HE wants.

Sectioning can only be done by a psychiatrist and the person would have to be firstly, unwilling to go into hospital and secondly the person needs to be sectionable under the Mental Health Act.

If he appears to be normal, says he doesn't want to kill himself etc etc, then...I'm afraid that's his choice. It's very difficult to help someone who doesn't want your help and appears not to need help.

Unfortunately, hundreds upon thousands of people say they'll kill themselves and not all can be taken into the wards. In my opinion, people who really want to do that - will find a way. The majority of people don't really want to die, they just want the situation to change cause it's too difficult just now.


Maybe you need to go talk to someone about this? I know it's difficult to deal with and can be reeeeeeeeeeally stressful.

Anyway, hope all is good with the new neice/nephew!! try and enjoy that bit eh?

xx