OT Absolutely Mortified!!!

Discussion in 'Lipotrim Forum' started by XxAbbiexX23, 11 December 2010 Social URL.

  1. XxAbbiexX23

    XxAbbiexX23 Dieting & Mummy To Ethan

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    A few weeks ago, our next door neighbours decided to do a bit of gardening. Our bush in our garden tends to overhang into theirs so we don't mind if they decide to cut it back a bit, but the neighbours decided to go one step further and chop some of the tree next the bush down and I mean literally all of the tree until it was just a stump. Not completely down to the base, but the top of it has gone!
    We rent this property and OH had decided that rather than go knocking on the door himself and risking getting into a big hoohah about it, he would call the police and report it because actually is an offence to do that to someone elses property.
    The police came round to us, spoke to us, we explained we didn't want any other action (even though we had the right), other than for the neighbours to be spoken to and have things sorted out that way. The policeman said we were right to have done things this way because so many people who take the law into their own hands only make things worse, so I felt a bit better after initially panicking about it because me being someone who hates confrontation, didn't want to make things awkward.

    Anyway, so 2 weeks has gone by and OH was just going out to the car and the neighbour was coming home and then decides to pull him up on why he called the police? So OH told him and then decided to finish up with saying "Don't do it again", to which the neighbour replied "Or what?", then OH says "Try it!".

    I am mortified, the last thing I want is to be falling out with the neighbours over a sodding tree. Yes, they were wrong to have done it, but OH could have left out the "Don't do it again" bit, the police would obviously have told them not to.

    I've written them a letter apologising for the way things went, but politely explaining the reason why we did it. The fact that we as tenants are responsible for the upkeep of the property both inside and out and any changes the landlord isn't happy about, we are at risk of being lumbered with a big charge for any repairs which we don't want. I told them they are fine to do their gardening but if there is anything on our side of the fence that they are wishing to cut, could they ask us first so we can seek permission from the landlord just so that our backs are covered should anything go wrong.
    I hope I've not made the situation worse myself but I just can't stand the thought of being at war with my neighbours. I like to get along with everyone and I'd like that to include them so have asked if we can put a line under all this and start afresh. I hope they'll be OK with this. I'm a bit on edge about it to be honest, am not entirely sure I should have written the letter but I at least wanted to offer the olive branch.

    I used to be bullied by my dads next door neighbour and she made my life hell and I'd rather not have the same again here. I just hope that they'll be ok and we'll be able to get along from now on.

    But I'm so embarrassed by OH, he is so defensive in the way he speaks that I don't hold out much hope. [​IMG]
     
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  3. SandraB

    SandraB Gold Member

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    You don't have an easy life do you Abbie? Personally, though, sweetheart, if anything like that happens again I would contact your landlord in the first instance rather than the law. I accept that you are well within your rights but it will seem less aggressive , particularly as your OH will happily make things worse!

    Fortunately we don't have neighbours either here or in France, but when I moved in with Paul nearly 20 years ago he didn't speak to the neighbours on either side of our terraced house.....it was a nightmare for me, they used to call the Police even if I parked my car six inches over their boundary, they regularly cut down plants (sound familiar?) and even kicked my cat and damaged his jaw!

    Anything for a quiet life eh? Xxx
     
  4. XxAbbiexX23

    XxAbbiexX23 Dieting & Mummy To Ethan

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    Yeah I know, I was not really impressed with the idea of calling the police because it seemed so trivial, but if it was a choice of my OH going next door and ending up in a ruckus or the police being called, then the police it was going to be.
    In my letter I did say though that in future we'd really appreciate it if they could ask first if they want to chop anything down which isn't on their side of the fence because it really is so daft going through all this over a tree! But like I said, we wanted to be the best tenants and cover our backs, even if it meant doing something OTT! We can't afford to lose our deposit if the landlord is unhappy with anything that's happened here.

    We're not that petty that we'd go to the extremes your neighbours went to, but because of what happened and it not being our property, we took the action we thought would cause the least trouble. Maybe OH should have just gone next door! lol!
     
  5. so so hopefull

    so so hopefull Full Member

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    neighbours do my head in lol i only have neighbours on one side of me and they are very loud with people calling at all times of the night baning our door by mistake of sitting revving thier engines on my drive. but i dont want hassle so dont do anything. one night i had 3 friends round drinking and at 12am he comes and tells me turn the music off as he wants to go to bed as he has work early. being the good neighbour i do this. a few mornings later after i get my son to school i turn the music on to do my housework only for him to come banging again saying can you turn that off i am trying to sleep i dont like to get up early. again i said sorry and switched it off..............i sat thinking about it and my blood was boiling i decided he cannot tell me when to play my music so i turned it on and went to his door asking him who he thought he was and when could i play it we ended in a maSSSIVE row and as bad as it was before it is a nightmare now :-(
    x x x
     
  6. IreneH

    IreneH Gold Member

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    I can understand how you feel. I hate confrontation and worry about everything. The fact that you are tenants makes it worse. I can see why you don't want to get on the wrong side of your landlord.

    I like your letter. Perhaps next time you get to talk to your landlord you could tell him what has happened and see how he wants you to deal with it or whether he wants to deal with it.

    Irene xx
     
  7. SandraB

    SandraB Gold Member

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    What a nightmare......I'm a landlord (landlady?) too, hope I treat my tenants well! They live in a flat on top of our garages though, so the only other people that they have to worry about are the OH and me......

    Hope it all works out Abbie, everybody has the right to live in peace x
     
  8. MrsG1984

    MrsG1984 Member

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    were renting now but at the house we used to own we took the kids to a halloween party and when we came back someone had smashed in the newly fitted double glazing, the neighbour informed us they had seen who did it and actually spoke to them, funnily when we phoned the police the neighbour suddenly forgot all about it and coudnt remember. Our neighbours now are both older couples and are brilliant i wish they would be here forever. People just dont think before they act sometimes ,you have to deal with it in whatever way you think best.
     
  9. SlimmerSu

    SlimmerSu Gold Member

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    I really feel for you Abbie, cos reading that i could just picture Joe being the same, except he would have lamped him one (so at least be grateful for that!! lol)... I think i would have handled it the same way as you, except i wouldn't have written anything down about what OH had threatened.. Simply because if it gets out of hand in the future, there is something written down that is negative on your side (perhaps that's just me being paranoid!)... I know you like to keep the peace, and that is a great trait to have... I don't talk to one of my neighbours cos we had a row about her dog barking, but i really don't care... Me and Joe have names for a lot of our neighbours, some meant in a kind way, and others not so much!! lol.... We have "The Dingles", "The Troll" (she really looks like she should live under a bridge!! lol), 4x4 man etc... Part of the reason for this is we have a parrot, so if we talked about them by name we could never be 100% sure the parrot wouldn't land us in it in the future!! lol

    I am sure once the tension dies down you will be fine hun x x x
     
  10. so so hopefull

    so so hopefull Full Member

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    lol @ last post x x x
     
  11. Jayne33

    Jayne33 Fighting for My Health

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    LMAO @Su :D

    Awww, Abbie, it's horrid when these sort of unsettled situations arise. Fingers crossed your neighbours will accept the olive branch now and draw a line under it all and it can all be forgotten about. Big ((hugs)) xx
     
  12. funkystrut

    funkystrut Full Member

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    Abbey....try not to worry now...maybe informing your landlord about the incedent would be a good idea so that they are aware if anything else happens in the future.

    Su...you really crack me up!!! 'The troll' love it!!! LOL!:D
     
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