Seriously tempted to do a water fast for a day or two instead of having the stupid shakes to try and get a mini boost coz seriously i cant just cant have a three lb loss on my first weigh i would be mortified n in the past whenever i have done 2 500 fast days one after the other i have always seen a loss on the third day when weigh in.
Coz i just cant do this it just wont allow it i need to see the 13s psychologically or else it will mess me up for the rest of the diet if i was half way thru the jouney and i didnt lose a week here n there then would have understtood but this is the first week n i am like obese not exactly close to goal or anythign like that.
My body wont allow it i cant go thru the embarrasment of not having lost on weigh day especialy coz its the first day of meeting my consultant.
If i dont lose by thursday morning then i will fast thursday and friday as no i am not starving myself on these shakes just to not see a loss on the scales especially this early on regardless of whether its water retention or whatevr science nonsense tries to explain this bizarre idea.
I will give it one more day n wednesday wil be just shakes but seriously if i dont lose then will seriously just water fast for two days just to try n getmy body up and running again.
Maybe its the tetras thats causing me the stall or the veg soup i reli cant bluming tell coz as far as im aware all of them r still low calories and surly they cant have that many additivirs or else wouldnt be clased as heathy right :s to prevent losing weight.
Dont get me rong i am glad iv come this far but i reli cant afford to come saturday morning not knowing that i have tried everytjing to tryn see the 13s.
N then next week might just buy packs of shakes rather then tetras and see if that makes any diff might even stop with the soups as well and judt stick to powdered shakes where im just addig water and ice to it and no extras or nothing to it :s
upset isnt even the word.
As for my height i am obese i think my bmi is like 41 or somethig stupid like that.
And not to see those number going down is the most demotivating thing in the world like i cant even explain in words how upsettig this is especially when ur sacrificing something as normal as food wich ppl do every single day whether its going out for a meal or making a meal or buying food on the go its like the most normla thing every for day to day purposes n for me not to lose the first week is just devestating i would have much rather seen a decent loss in first week n not as great a loss on week 2 as would have mentally been prepared for that as weeksand 3 sometimes r low losses generally.
I am defo in ketosis coz breathe stinks dint feel hungry apart from the odd craving which have bot givdn into yet.
Sorry for the rant but this diary is addictive and it feels like my safe haven where i wont be judged or nothing along those lines.
I actually feel reli depressed and week one isnt even over yet
.
I have alwyas lose on the last two times i did a vlcd in my time and its not even like iv started a vlcd within weeks of each other i have gone by a good few years before i have re embarked on this vlcd diet.
Think the most annoying thing about any diet is that its so easy to say or hear give it another week to see if next week is any differnet but by then before u know a good month has gone by and ur still lacking results thats why summer chick i said will give it 8 weeks as i reli feel thats a long enough time to see a diff either in inch loss or scales loss or both.
If i do see results then of course will stay on for the full 12 weeks but if i dont see a diff in two motnhs tiem then i just wont see the point in doing it for an extra four weeks to make it to 12 weeks as if i dont seea diff in two months doubt anothe rmonth will give me the results i am needing or wanting for my health.
Im notgoing to lie i decided to start the cd for the fast losses n not for any other reason or else wiud have carried in trying to get bk on the 5/2 wagon.
Its mentally draining and psychologically painful to be on something like this it has takne me a long time to actualy make the first step and buy the products but this week has reli gotton me down need a blumin miracle though dont know how that will happen by saturday.
My fear of being the odd one out is alredy starting to come true
x
Im even not having the porridge or the meals or the bars to try n prvent a stall in loss ffs i am sticking to the basics as basic as can be :/
:s xxxx i promise next week will try to be more positive and upbeat but this has reli brought me down first week losses for me have always been 5lb n more alwyas due to the carb intake etc.
Alsoin the past the earlier on in the morning iv weighed the lower the number on scales has been as have gone a whole nught sleepin not eating or drinking so there is usually always a loss even if late in the day it goes up again due to drinking water or whatever :/ this tym round this is not the case n dont get why soo close to the 13s yert can se it i alwaysbreathe in deep before standing in those scales.
I need to see something anything by saturday morning or else those dominoes will over take me and i will have failed even before i have even started judt coz of a rubbish first weeks weigh in
:/ we nevrhave the sun n the week im starting a new lifestyle the bludy decides to beat down on us what is life :/ :/ :/ cystitis is killing me still :/ wednesday going to chemist instead of work to tryn see if can have something for this :/ just want this week to be over already i was soo looking forward to weigh in as monday i thought its ok still got a good few days left till first weigh the scales is bound to go down by then :/ clearly bludy not.
X
