Refocus group - all welcome!
- Thread starter Spanglymum
- Start date
bluesunflower
Full Member
That's a great attitude and absolutely the right one! One little blip won't slow down your weight loss much at all. It's the evil chatterbox that convinces us to keep going 'as we've already blown it' that does most of the damage.
Phoenyx
Step away from the cake..
Lindsay988 I know how you feel. I realised today that food is the think I most look forward to in the eve - how sad is that! I don't have a partner and have 2 small kids so don't go out much. I work most eves, and I used to eat all evening, all my fav foods, and I really miss it. I need to find something to look forward to in the Eve's other than food. At the moment it's this forum.
Sparklymum first meeting tomorrow night - I think it's going to be v useful to have a meeting to aim for!
Hope everyone is doing well. I spent most of the day thinking about food and nearly caved about. 15 times. I will confess to having a wafer thin slice of ham, just the one! Followed swiftly by a big glass of water, bouillon, and a sharp exit from the kitchen. At least I avoided the ham sandwich I was making for my kiddies!
Day 2 over thank goodness!
Sparklymum first meeting tomorrow night - I think it's going to be v useful to have a meeting to aim for!
Hope everyone is doing well. I spent most of the day thinking about food and nearly caved about. 15 times. I will confess to having a wafer thin slice of ham, just the one! Followed swiftly by a big glass of water, bouillon, and a sharp exit from the kitchen. At least I avoided the ham sandwich I was making for my kiddies!
Day 2 over thank goodness!
Debbi8489
Silver Member
I do a mixture bluesunflower. I do BodyPump, BodyAttack, BodyCombat, BodyBalance and a Legs, Bums and Tums class. Sometimes I do a Step class if I can fit it in. I was the opposite from you. I did those classes while in abstinence as well. Felt brilliant and full of energy lol. I do find it a bit tricky sorting out what I'm going to eat and when I'm going to eat before I go to my classes. But I guess I'll work it out 
bluesunflower
Full Member
Debbi8489, that's brilliant! I'm hoping I'll feel differently in ketosis this time around and get that famous energy burst so many people get, because exercise is such a big part of my life now and I really don't want to get out the habit. Also, I want to lose less lean mass that I did last time around. So far so good, so hopefully energy levels will keep up.
Phoenyx, what you said about looking forward to eating at night really resonated with me. Breaking that habit/feeling is so hard, isn't it?
Even while I was maintaining and eating healthily I would look forward to getting home and preparing my big salad, veggie chilli, fish or whatever else it was. It felt like a ritual, something comforting to look forward to. I realise I did it with packs last time and am doing it even now by keeping as many as I can for the evenings.
Phoenyx, what you said about looking forward to eating at night really resonated with me. Breaking that habit/feeling is so hard, isn't it?
Even while I was maintaining and eating healthily I would look forward to getting home and preparing my big salad, veggie chilli, fish or whatever else it was. It felt like a ritual, something comforting to look forward to. I realise I did it with packs last time and am doing it even now by keeping as many as I can for the evenings.
Spanglymum
Gold Member
Just weighed in: FIFTEEN POUNDS!!!!!! IN ONE WEEK!!!
(happy dance)
(did I hear anyone say 'metabolic syndrome' and 'insulin resistance', and 'PMT'?!) no wonder I felt so rubbish last Monday. How much water is it possible for my body to store? I've obviously turned into a camel.
Wow
Have a great Tuesday, everyone - and stick with it!!
(happy dance)
(did I hear anyone say 'metabolic syndrome' and 'insulin resistance', and 'PMT'?!) no wonder I felt so rubbish last Monday. How much water is it possible for my body to store? I've obviously turned into a camel.
Wow
Have a great Tuesday, everyone - and stick with it!!
bluesunflower
Full Member
WOOOW, that's amazing!! WELL DONE!!
You're basically halfway through after only one week & lost over two BMI points in one go. Wonderful!
Carbs really are of the devil
Have a great day ladies!! We can do this.
You're basically halfway through after only one week & lost over two BMI points in one go. Wonderful!
Carbs really are of the devil
Have a great day ladies!! We can do this.
Lindsay988
Full Member
WOW spangly!!! Well done!!! Your an inspiration to me! X
rosieposie
Full Member
All of above. So worth what you went through yeh
Don't get complacent just show us all what a great second week you can do
Oh those carbs and that looking for food to give us so much ( which of course it never quite does)
If we can learn how to change that thinking what a difference it will make to us
Happy Tuesday Spangly and all
Don't get complacent just show us all what a great second week you can do
Oh those carbs and that looking for food to give us so much ( which of course it never quite does)
If we can learn how to change that thinking what a difference it will make to us
Happy Tuesday Spangly and all
Spanglymum
Gold Member
Thanks, everyone. I still can't believe it!!
So what would be a good substitute for alcohol/carbs then? I know I/we mustn't be complacent - either while on the plan, or even more importantly, once I/we come off again. I don't know why I have this "oh, go on... you deserve it" thing going on. Why do I "deserve" it? (whatever "it" may be - trying not to mention food specifics here!) Ok, so I work hard and have a busy life, but I made the choices that chose me this life. I choose to keep going. I choose to be a martyr (from time to time, definitely!)... so what's the pay off?
If I start feeling put upon and martyrish and self pitying, I get the excuse to self-medicate with sugar and carbs and alcohol.
And it IS medication. I'm sure I read somewhere that refined carbs and alcohol cause a similar response in the brain of susceptible people as cocaine! No wonder the addiction is so strong.
But, having wrestled with smoking and done the whole Allen Carr years ago (wanted to quit before ttc) I learned from that that the chemical addiction comes first and then you post-justify continuing to use whatever it is with excuses. It's the same with the Rational Recovery approach re alcohol...
So... I want to get to a place where the addiction isn't triggered, so I no longer try to find excuses to "comfort" myself with these things that do not suit my body! I don't want to go round this again... the whole opening my wardrobe and nothing to wear thing is horrible and I'm back there again after I swore I never would be.
So what would be a good substitute for alcohol/carbs then? I know I/we mustn't be complacent - either while on the plan, or even more importantly, once I/we come off again. I don't know why I have this "oh, go on... you deserve it" thing going on. Why do I "deserve" it? (whatever "it" may be - trying not to mention food specifics here!) Ok, so I work hard and have a busy life, but I made the choices that chose me this life. I choose to keep going. I choose to be a martyr (from time to time, definitely!)... so what's the pay off?
If I start feeling put upon and martyrish and self pitying, I get the excuse to self-medicate with sugar and carbs and alcohol.
And it IS medication. I'm sure I read somewhere that refined carbs and alcohol cause a similar response in the brain of susceptible people as cocaine!
No wonder the addiction is so strong.But, having wrestled with smoking and done the whole Allen Carr years ago (wanted to quit before ttc) I learned from that that the chemical addiction comes first and then you post-justify continuing to use whatever it is with excuses. It's the same with the Rational Recovery approach re alcohol...
So... I want to get to a place where the addiction isn't triggered, so I no longer try to find excuses to "comfort" myself with these things that do not suit my body! I don't want to go round this again... the whole opening my wardrobe and nothing to wear thing is horrible and I'm back there again after I swore I never would be.
Phoenyx
Step away from the cake..
Fantastic loss spangly, well done! Good motivation!
I found a little book in whsmiths yesterday called "but I deserve this chocolate - 50 diet derailing excuses and how to avoid them." it's brill, all about identifying the excuses and using mindfulness (being more aware) to avoid them. Lots of strategies too. I'm going to keep it in my handbag just to remind me that they are excuses, nothing more.
I found a little book in whsmiths yesterday called "but I deserve this chocolate - 50 diet derailing excuses and how to avoid them." it's brill, all about identifying the excuses and using mindfulness (being more aware) to avoid them. Lots of strategies too. I'm going to keep it in my handbag just to remind me that they are excuses, nothing more.
well done Spangly that loss is fantasic. You must be so glad you stayed on track. 7 off for me so not to bad with my derailment at the weekend. I also need to find out why i drink and eat to much, i just have to sway a little of track and thats me done, may as blow it and start again in the morning is my norml responce. I have to find how to eat things without it turning into a total blow out. Why can i not have a takeaway without feeling the need to eat the whole lot on my plate and what is left on anyone elses as well. ? I dont know how to say i have had enough, i think may as well stuff my face because this is "bad food" and i dont know when i will let myself have it again, then the wine takes over and it is sod the lot i have having what i want.
bluesunflower
Full Member
Jess123, same here. It's almost as if I think it's the last time I'll have it (riiiight), so might as well make the most of it.
Another "genius" crooked thought that usually goes through my mind in those moments is 'might as well finish the box so there's none left for me to binge on later/tomorrow'.
Day 4 done - think ketosis is just 'round the corner if not here already. Had a bit of emotional hunger this afternoon, but a good sign is that I was craving healthy food and not the crap I've been eating lately.
Really need to get back to a place where carbs just aren't that appealing anymore, like at the end of Total/beginning of RTM last time.
Just came back from yoga and having my last pack atm. Would love to have a bar right now, but I'm not having any this time around, I'm scared it'll lead me off track. Early-ish night it is then.
How has everyone else's day been?
Another "genius" crooked thought that usually goes through my mind in those moments is 'might as well finish the box so there's none left for me to binge on later/tomorrow'.
Day 4 done - think ketosis is just 'round the corner if not here already. Had a bit of emotional hunger this afternoon, but a good sign is that I was craving healthy food and not the crap I've been eating lately.
Really need to get back to a place where carbs just aren't that appealing anymore, like at the end of Total/beginning of RTM last time.
Just came back from yoga and having my last pack atm. Would love to have a bar right now, but I'm not having any this time around, I'm scared it'll lead me off track. Early-ish night it is then.
How has everyone else's day been?
rosieposie
Full Member
Jess 7lb off is good especially with your blip. So well done. Congratulate yourself on the days you stuck with it.
I think it's a good first step that you are recognising how you behave at these times.
I can't remember if you are actually doing LL Jess or not but if you are talk to your counsellor about it
I think you have to find a way of saying STOP to yourself and that you can have it again but later when you have got weight off and learnt more about yourself and how to control these perishing crooked thoughts.
Hope someone who is more successful than me at doing it can give more help but do keep thinking 7lb gone.
I think it's a good first step that you are recognising how you behave at these times.
I can't remember if you are actually doing LL Jess or not but if you are talk to your counsellor about it
I think you have to find a way of saying STOP to yourself and that you can have it again but later when you have got weight off and learnt more about yourself and how to control these perishing crooked thoughts.
Hope someone who is more successful than me at doing it can give more help but do keep thinking 7lb gone.
Rosieposie i am on CD so do not go to meetings. Ihad few drinks at the weekend but no food so i did manage some control. My last post was more my thinking when not on CD with regards to how i eat. If i had not been on CD i would also have ordered a takeaway. I need to find a way to control myself after thie diet is done because i cant keep putting myself thougt this. How are you doing?
bluesunflower
Full Member
How's everyone doing today?
Here's a quote which is a bit 'tough love', but it is really true that at the moment these are the only two options:
"Suffer the pain of discipline or suffer the pain of regret"
Will keep it in mind throughout the day and throughout the journey.
Have a good one ladies.
Here's a quote which is a bit 'tough love', but it is really true that at the moment these are the only two options:
"Suffer the pain of discipline or suffer the pain of regret"
Will keep it in mind throughout the day and throughout the journey.
Have a good one ladies.
Spanglymum
Gold Member
Ooh I like that, blue sunflower. Very wise! I'm totally identifying with the crooked thoughts on here as well. The kind of all-or-nothing thinking, and sod it etc. I'm remembering some stuff I had a lightbulb moment with some time ago, reading this thread. it was in the rational recovery approach to giving up alcohol, where they describe your brain as being two separate bits. Not the hemispheres, but the primitive brain and the evolved brain. The primitive brain wants whatever it thinks it needs (including pleasure) for survival, and is ruthless in pursuit of it. But it can be conquered/mastered by the evolved brain, if you become aware of the duality.
I think we've all experienced that feeling of planning and really deep down committing to being 'good' all day (evolved brain) but then got exhausted by the mental battles by the end of the day, and caved in, because the primitive brain is very persuasive ('just have one', 'you deserve it' etc etc). Then felt full of self-loathing and remorse.
One way that's supposed to help is instead of thinking 'I want a...' you replace 'I' with 'it", so the primitive brain's demands become separate from you and more visible. So 'i want a (insert food item here)' becomes 'it wants a...'
Might be worth a try? I don't want to give up carbs and alcohol completely, forever, but I do want to find strategies to manage my consumption of them.
I think we've all experienced that feeling of planning and really deep down committing to being 'good' all day (evolved brain) but then got exhausted by the mental battles by the end of the day, and caved in, because the primitive brain is very persuasive ('just have one', 'you deserve it' etc etc). Then felt full of self-loathing and remorse.
One way that's supposed to help is instead of thinking 'I want a...' you replace 'I' with 'it", so the primitive brain's demands become separate from you and more visible. So 'i want a (insert food item here)' becomes 'it wants a...'
Might be worth a try? I don't want to give up carbs and alcohol completely, forever, but I do want to find strategies to manage my consumption of them.
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Phoenyx
Step away from the cake..
Hi all! Love the quote blue sunflower, v appropriate!
I'm with you spangly, I'm happy to portion control etc and make changes to my eating habits, but I don't want to say goodbye to carbs and alcohol for life - that would doom me to failure.
Obsessed with food today. Not hungry as such, but thinking about food a lot, and counting down to my next food pack. Is that normal?
I'm with you spangly, I'm happy to portion control etc and make changes to my eating habits, but I don't want to say goodbye to carbs and alcohol for life - that would doom me to failure.
Obsessed with food today. Not hungry as such, but thinking about food a lot, and counting down to my next food pack. Is that normal?
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