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Sex....quite a personal thing!

#1
This is rather a personal topic so feel free to pass through and not comment!

I am just curious as to whether or not you have found sex a difference experience since you have lost alot of weight!?

I am finding it soooo different! Not in a bad way, but firstly, I have almost found myself distracted by bones, size, shapes, etc.... and secondly, it feels better, of course...arghh I cannot explain this too well as I am trying to be subtle!

I am sure the psychological aspect of how you feel about yourself and confidence etc... will have a huge impact!

I am sure some of you must be sitting here knowing exactly what I mean!!

Kat xx
 
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Foxtrot

Is back in the saddle!
#2
Sex was non existent with last hubby when I was slimmer. I've only been bigger with this hubby since all we do is spoil ourselves. :eek:

Sex is fantastic but I do prefer him feeling bones to blubber!! Except when he plays the xylophone on my ribs. :rolleyes: But even that has a nice appeal.

I think the psycological aspect is probably the largest change. Being able to wear nice underwear, even to Sainsbury's and knowing you're the only one who knows, is a lot different than just pulling on the same old bloomers everyday!! :flirt2:

Is that the sort of thing your subtle meant??:confused::)

I know there was a post about those who now struggle with the sex side of relationships. I'll see if I can find it.....
 

Jezebella

Playing the Angel
#3
Kat, you always post the most interesting threads :)

Being single and thus having been celibate for way too long (I won't mention quite how long in case you all have a good laugh!!) This was celibacy by choice because I think I felt too down on myself physically, but also because I decided from the beginning of this year to put a price on myself and stop having random unfulfilling sex. However, I digress...

Since starting LL and probably because of having not been in the saddle for a while so to speak, I have absolutely zero sex drive... not sure when it's coming back either? Bit of a worry really, but I am looking forward to seeing how sex is different as a thin person, my only worry is the flabby bits and the saggy tits - I look great in clothes but arrrrrgh when they come off!! Who would have thought I could have had just as many hang ups as a thinny???

Interesting to hear from your viewpoint that it is different. I guess I really will wait for a decent guy this time, who hopefully accepts me for who I am above all else, that will probably help with my flabby issues :) Having said all of that, I do feel sexier and more feminine.

Jez (who should probably take some viagra or something)
xx
 
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#4
I can vaguely remember having sex when i was slim but i do remember having orgasms during penetrative sex which is very rare now. don't think it's psychological, it is physical.

The closeness must be better instead of him lying on top of the fat.
The genitals are less fat also, again, more closeness and different feelings for the clitoris as it won't be cocooned in fat. (sorry if it's tmi)

Kat, not too sure if this is what you were on about but it is how i see it lol
 
#5
Nooo FT those sort of things are exactly what I meant! It is sooooooooo different more physically than anything else!

Jez, it will happen because you have changed! Psychologically alot changes but you are right, fat, inbetween or slim I am sure people still have hang ups!

It was great before but Sunshine I am sure you just hit the nail right on the head (did ponder a different analogy but thought it too rude for MM) LOLOL

Happy Kat xx
 
#6
When i met my hubby we were at it like rabbits,but since i've put weight on i'm much less interested. i think it has alot to do with how i feel about myself,confidence etc! I'm tryin to loose the weight and already have days when i feel good about myself again,so things are looking up,if you know what i mean:D
 
#7
Fab mommy!

I have never been slim so it is like having sex with someone elses body! LOL

I also notice that although I am more agile and flexible I have to adjust positions somewhat! lol

Kat xx
 

Minerva

...we're sinking deeper.
#8
Difficult this question... I guess it differs for everyone.
I suppose the psychological does play a large part - because if we're less conscious we can relax more - and in relaxing more we can let ourselves enjoy the situation.
I know I certainly don't mind my boyfriend seeing me naked anymore... well I do because he now says I'm too thin (not in a bad way before you all shout!) - but the selfconsciousness is definitely less than it was when I was covered in rolls of flab.

However I do find that since starting LL nearly 2 years ago now my sex drive has died a very miserable death. Strange for a 23 year old. I don't enjoy the 'it' at all, but I do feel more reward for being closer to my boyfriend? We 'fit' together better if it makes sense. :D
 
#9
I have always been obese and was over 210lb when I married my OH 11 years ago. Affairs in the bedroom have always been really good and not inhibited at all. However, as I have lost the weight I have also mislaid my sex drive and definitely have less sensation than I used to. OH, on the other hand, is loving my new body and is much more physical - but is being very understanding :eek:. We'll work it out. I know I love lying in bed and feeling my bones, but when stood upright and naked I hate my boobs, tum and legs :(. Clothes are brilliant!
 
#10
TI that is an interesting point!

I love my new body both lying down and standing up!

I have never been slim till now, hence the feeling like I am using someone elses body! lol

My partner loved my body before and loves it now but it is certainly different for me. I just asked him and he said it is just me in a more toned (!)? lol) slimmer body! He the said it is very different in a very good way as there is alot less to caress. He then said it was like exploring someone elses body but it was very good - made me laugh! bless him!

As for sensations - well, wow that is very different in ways I just don't think I should share on here! lol

Kat xx
 

Jezebella

Playing the Angel
#11
amazing how some people seem to get more revved up and some less so. Thinking about it, our hormones have a lot to do with our fat, since some of them need fat to be productive so to speak. When my mom was going through menoupause and she lost all her weight, the doctors were very concerned as she did not have enough fat on her to hold any hormones so upped the hrt (well that was as she explained it to me) so perhaps those of us who seem to have lost a lot of sex drive (I did have one previously) have lost it because our hormones are out of whack and our bodies will take time to catch up and balance out?? I also know that being on birth control has a massive effect on my sex drive, compared to when I am on it, but oh so cant afford a baby right now, so am enjoying my proxy pregnancy by way of the cat!!!

God do I sound like a sad spinster or what??????

Jez
xx
 

Foxtrot

Is back in the saddle!
#12
There is a thread somewhere (I'm having a past thread day!!) about the storing of hormones in fat. I'm not going to look for that one, I can't even find the other one. :rolleyes: Daisy will know about it I expect, she's clever like that. :D

Do you think also that you are more skin aware since losing weight too Kat? I know I don't feel as, well, numb to the touch anywhere like when I was larger. I had a manicure a couple of months ago where there was a hand and arm massage too and I really had to concentrate on where I was!! :eek: 'Course, explained to OH exactly what he had to do when I got home :flirt2:. I have very soft hands and arms now. :D It's a journey of new discoveries all the time.

Jez, I'm sure the cat appreciates the extra doting without having to share you. ;) And you sound quite level headed to me. Better none that the wrong one.
 
#14
FT & MrsE exactly those things!

Jez, I am sure Mrs Puddytat is loving all the attention she is getting and those babies are far cheaper than the human sort! lol You do not sound like a sad ole spinster at all!

I even bought some sexy undies from Anne Summers today hehe

Kat xx
 

Foxtrot

Is back in the saddle!
#17
Good girl!! And don't always buy them for 'him' either!!!
 
#18
ha ha FT, I buy things for me! It is not a new thing for me to buy things like that, the new part is the size 12! lol ;);)

Kat xx
 
#20
Rik likes it Jez and in the grand scheme of things it is rather nice to wear something like this (I know you know what I mean lol ;))

Kat xx
 


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