So so emotional :(

Discussion in 'Very Low Calorie Diets' started by KittyB, 8 October 2006 Social URL.

  1. KittyB

    KittyB Gold Member

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    I can't stop bluddy crying again.

    I feel such a failure, I battled so hard to get off my anti depressants last year, and in the last 3 weeks I feel like I've gone back to square one :(

    Tomorrow I fear I'm going to have to ask to be put back on the tablets.

    I wonder how much of this is because I've never dealt with my food issues, and since I've been on LL I'm having to abstain so have left myself open to forcing myself to address things?

    I feel like such a cow, I must be effecting how my boyfriend feels about eating in front of me.

    I can't get into the mindset of doing this diet for myself - that probably sounds really bizarre.
    the only reason I went along to the session was to keep my mum happy. 3 of her colleagues had done really well on the diet and she was desperate for me to do it.

    I can't get to the bottom of how I can so desperately want to be thin, but not want to be doing this for myself (if that makes any sense?)

    I'm so unhappy, and I have no reason to be. I cry at the slightest thing and it's unnerving me.

    I'm sorry for blurting all of this out. I need to make sense of things but feel like I'm just making everything so much worse :(

    Kitty xxx
     
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  3. lashly

    lashly Regular Member

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    Hi Kitty, sorry you're having such a tough time of it at the moment. It is a very psychological diet and as you get through each day you get stronger and stronger. On a positive note you're not expected to have all the answers, especially not at the start of a journey like this one. It is strange but I've learn't so much about myself through this diet journey, good and bad.

    Maybe give yourself an emotional time out and see where this journey takes you. This is diet is all about you and even if you don't feel it yet you're going to become a thinner and stronger person. I see where you're coming from on the wanting to do it for yourself issue but the bottom line is you're doing it anyway and I think the self esteem willl come and you'll eventually feel it.

    Lots of love and hugs
    Louise x
     
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  4. Flopster

    Flopster Got a life thank you!

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    Hi Kitty

    Firstly I struggled at the beginning because I went through a very "down" stage - that down that I couldn't make any decisions and actually had to hand the running of my business over to my husband, I was stroppy, tearful and very unhappy.

    I did some research and it seems that the diet can surpress the seratonin (or however it is spelt) which is effectively your happy hormones.

    But it only lasted a couple of weeks and it is nothing more than a distant memory now and I am back to normal (whatever that is).

    One thing that did strike me though is that this diet whilst it can be the easiest thing in the world, can also be the most difficult as well, it IS hard to cope with what life throws our way whilst doing this and I really truly believe that you have to COMPLETELY want this and REALLY TRULY want it. If the time isn't right for you then maybe you need to reconsider.

    However, if you are anything like me, then you may be scared of success - for me, I have spent my life wanted to get thin, the thought of living the rest of my life as a thin person scares me to death - afterall I love my food!! But I also feel as if I have a golden opportunity here to do this and to relearn how to eat properly.

    Only you can decide what you want to do, but, you HAVE to want to do it for yourself, you can't do this one to please anyone else, it is too hard!

    I would speak to your counsellor about your feelings, this is afterall what you are paying for - and along the way you will pick up some mighty powerful tools to help you.

    Good luck and keep posting.
     
  5. i'lldoit

    i'lldoit Banned

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    hI kITTY
    I Was on antidepressants early last year after my 3rd baby,and I came off them as I wanted to do CD I know it was too early.I have really bad days when I just am so so down I can't pull myself out of it,then for the past week I havent had any bad depression days only struggling on LL.They say you cant really do CD~ LL if you suffer with depression ? but I feel alot of my depression is my weight?
    You have to do whats best for your health,if LL is hard at the mo then try to do WW or SW etc but still come here as everyone as you know is so supportive and also so are YOU ,you have got me through a couple of Bad days in the past 2 weeks So thankyou HUN (((((hugs))))
    xxc
     
  6. KittyB

    KittyB Gold Member

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    Thank you all for your replies.
    I went to see the doctor yesterday and she's been reassuring me that my high emotions are probably linked to my now 3 week period!

    She's prescribled me norethisterone to try and stop the bleeding. One thing that did concern me was my blood pressure.
    Yesterday it was 160/110 so am going to have to keep an eye on it.
    Also, she told me that she didn't feel she could continue to support me on a 500 cal plan and that she'd be happier with around 800 cals.

    So (((Isobel))) has kindly agreed to take me on CD in a fortnight subject to the medical form on either the 790 or 1000 plan.

    I'm so relieved to still have options.

    The last few weeks have left me worrying about the impact I'm having on my relationship with my BF and now I feel like a weight has been lifted. He's so supportive and assues me that any problems were only ever in my mind, and not real. But I just couldn't stop the paranoia.

    Thanks
    Kath
     
  7. Gen

    Gen Normal

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    Oh Kath i can nearly feel the relief in your last post. that is brilliant you can do CD and the 790 plan is nearly as quick as SS'ing 100%!!!

    you lucky duck having Isobel as your CDC, she is one amazing woman :D :D :D

    glad you are feeling better and ur boyfriend sounds like a keeper ;)

    love

    Gen xx
     
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