Someone throw me a lifejacket, i'm drowning.

Discussion in 'Slimming World' started by Stackhead, 22 August 2011 Social URL.

  1. Stackhead

    Stackhead Slow and steady...

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    Ladies and gentlemen of Minimins,

    I hate writing this, really I do but i'm in a deep dark pit at the minute and i'm hoping you can throw a few torches down for me.

    I've been on SW since the end of January and i'm losing very slowly. I've just hit the 2 stone mark (well not so much after this week). The rate of weight loss doesn't bother me, i'm having a life, going out and enjoying myself so the fact that i'm lighter than I was at the beginning of the year is a fantastic thing.

    My issue is now. I have no motivation to follow the plan and i'm finding myself needlessly cheating - having a slice a bread and butter while i'm cooking tea - i'm not hungry I just want it. Or if I don't cheat, i'm not following plan at all.

    So here I am facing, for the first time, a monthly gain. I.e. unless something drastic happens, I will be either the same or weigh more in September then I did in August. And it's just hit me, right now. and it's all I can do not to reach for food.

    It started when I was talking to my friend at work (who is doing WW) and she was talking about getting to target, which is 7lbs away, taking her total weight loss to 1 1/2 stone. A fantastic acheivement and i'm really pleased for her.

    BUT it dawned on me that I have over 100lbs before I reach my target and that it was going to stretch over years, not months. Since then i've pretty much been on a downward spiral. No matter what I do, I can't shake it off. And i'm starting to annoy myself.

    So really this post is about a few things.
    1. I think I just needed to get this out into the open, typing it has been fairly theraputic.
    2. I need a kick up the backside, a massive one. Does anyone have big boots?
    3. What do you do when the task before you i.e. the weight to lose overwhelms you? How do you put it all into perspective?

    If you made it to the bottom then well done you and thanks for reading. I already feel a little bit better.

    Stack. xx
     
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  3. mrsthunderbolt

    mrsthunderbolt Silver Member

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    Sorry to hear you are so down. I like reading your posts & you offer such sensible advice to others so try telling yourself the same.

    Would it help you to knuckle down a bit & maybe boost your weight loss by socialising less or being more sensible when you do?

    It's very hard when friends have only lbs to target & you have a hundred or more. You & you will do it.

    I have size 8/9 feet so consider yourself well & truly kicked up the bum!
     
  4. Shirleen

    Shirleen Gold Member

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    Hi hunny, I too have been doing the same thing, so no answer from me!
    However I did read this article and wondered about having a 3 day break every six weeks. To be able to go to work without a ton of food and grab a sandwich etc would be bliss!
     
  5. mrsthunderbolt

    mrsthunderbolt Silver Member

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    Interesting article Shirleen.
     
  6. valerie11

    valerie11 Gold Member

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    hi hun well done on ur loss so far (no mean feat) break ur target down into smaller amounts aim for 10lbs increments (or whatever amount) when u say u still have 100lbs to lose it must be very daunting and un-do-able by breaking it down it is do-able if u get my drift . i have had several off plan moments and put weight back on but now when i'm tempted to go off plan i think to myself "do i like what i see when i look in the mirror" the answer is no if i go off plan i am never going to get to like myself :rolleyes: i hope u find the motivation to carry on, read through a few of the diaries of members that have lost 5 plus stone and hopefully u will see that it is achievable if you can stick with it, we r all here for you x good luck to finding ur mojo xx :character00180: i can't find a life jacket so sending u a surf board instead lol xx
     
  7. Jen411371

    Jen411371 Member

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    I don't know how much help I'm going to be but I've felt exactly how your feeling in the past so felt like I needed to reply! I was 20st at 20 and started ww. I lost two stone. But then I worked out how many pounds a week I was losing on average and then how many weeks it would take to lose all my weight. BIG MISTAKE. my warped head then convinced myself that I didn't want to waste 18 months of my life on a diet when I could be having fun. And then I found myself 24 stone at 24 years old. It's finally dawned on me that however long it takes, I've got to stick with it, and you have too! Even if we lose 1lb a week for the next two years, it's a much nicer thought than the alternative! Two years sounds like SO long, but it's really not. It goes so fast, and I don't know about you, but I want these 2 years to count. One thing I've done to make it more manageable is to break the weight I want to lose down into fractions. E.g. I've lost 20lbs but that's sounds minuscule next to the big number that I've got to lose, but when I worked it out, if I lose 3 more pounds, Im one eighth of the way there. Mega long post, sorry! Hope it helped a little X
     
  8. who_la_hoop

    who_la_hoop Silver Member

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    *hugs*

    I find it really helpful to think this way: OK, so it will take x months/years to get to target. But these are months that you have to live through anyway - so you might as well live through them and end up slim and healthy, rather than live through them feeling sad and ending up still overweight. It's kind of tough love, but it helps me a lot, particularly in those weak moments.

    In the present though, I think you need to try really hard to get back in control - I always, always find that once I've had a couple of good days under my belt then following plan is easy. It's getting those good days initially that can be hard, as for me one bad day follows another. If I were you I would plan my meals in advance, get a big shop in, and then do an actual paper food diary to keep on track. I also find it helpful to have free food in that feels a wee bit naughty if I know I'm low and liable to cheat - if I know I can have a big plate of SW chips with a hexa of cheese, then I'm so much less likely to get a big bag of crisps - and so on! You say you'll have a slice of bread and butter whilst cooking tea, so why not try and break that habit by cutting up some fruit to nibble on instead, or having a mugshot or similar? That way you can satisfy those cravings but still stick to plan.

    Good luck! You've already done so well, and I'm sure you can get back on track :)
     
  9. shenzi

    shenzi Gold Member

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    We all know how hard it is to get to goal in fact i still cannot imagine that i ever will but Im going to have a bloody go i tell ya! Break it down into smaller goals some of the goals i have are literally just to get through the month on sw without going majorly off track, don't worry about how long it is going to take just know that sometime in the future you will reach it and all this hard work will be worth it especially when you can walk into a shop pick something off the rails try it on and say WOW rather than not being able to find anything that fits!! Or walk around without thighs chafing together etc. We are all here to help you in any way we can.

    oh yeah and you can consider yourself well and truly kicked up the bum next time it will be the steel toe caps mrs! Now get back on track and lose it 1 pound at a time!
     
  10. Cai

    Cai has a thin girl inside!

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    i too am all about the smaller goals!
    do you have a time scale to stick to? something that u are aiming for like an event?
    I don't have and love having that freedom! I am loosing weigh for me and me alone, if it take me the next 20 years to get to where i want to be it will be because I kept going and cos I wanted to be happy when i look in the mirror.
    You have got to do it for YOU and YOU alone! If you want a week off, have it, if you want to treat yrself to a meal, do it...if you don't want to loose weight and want to go back to how you were...do it!...But i don't think you do!!!

    Set a mini goal...a full week 100% then a meal off...just a meal, not a week! And then after you have done 1 more week 100% see if you want the meal...bank it for a special time, a time with friends, family etc...
    I promise myself a little treat often, not always food related, hair do, nails done etc...but sometimes its a food treat.
    You will be able to do it! We all will. We just need to have our heads set in the correct frame of mind! x
     
  11. Bunnylush

    Bunnylush Gold Member

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    I think you should remind yourself,like many of us, how miserable you were before you started SW. Now your losing,getting to a better,healthier place and in control. I find it quite easy to stay on plan because having a miserable weigh in feels worse than a slice of bread and butter. If I think about eating something I think about standing on those scales.

    Can you plan a month of red days if you ate following EE? To mix things up and have a change? And to challenge yourself to be creative in the kitchen?

    Draw a line under this week,go to weigh in,face the demons and leave on a positive note xx
     
  12. katty

    katty Silver Member

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    i've always looked at sw as a healthy way of eating and not a diet. i can't imagine eating any other way now, there are so many foods for us to enjoy we needn't feel like we are dieting. for instance, my chocolate cravings have been crazy this week, so instead of reaching for the biggest bag of malteasers i could find, i looked through the recipes forum and found chocolate truffles, took barely any time to make them and i made them at 16 syns for the lot. i also had scan bran with a shape choc yogurt and banana and it was as good as any chocolate dessert in the fridge.
    every weekend i make a plan for the week and get my shopping. my meals are huge, my hubby even after a year of sw can't believe i am losing weight with the amount i eat.
    have a search through the recipes section or your books if you have some and make yourself a plan, look through peoples food diaries and weight loss diaries and find inspiration.
    as above, split it down into managable chunks, 7lb goals or a number you can focus on and then give yourself some kind of treat.
    we have a takeaway once a month, off plan, its one meal out of a month, i don't go mad but i make sure i enjoy it. you have come so far, get your head in the right place and get reading and planning. :)
     
  13. Stackhead

    Stackhead Slow and steady...

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    Thank you everyone, especially to those who used their big boots to kick me :D

    I'm back on plan this morning, releuctanly perhaps, but I am. I gave myself the biggest talking to last night. Tears were involved and I came to the conclusion that I still wanted to lose weight, so I had to suck it up, stop complaining and just get on with it!

    So that's what i'm doing. I keep a paper diary but i've decided to keep one on here too just to keep everything in perspective for me, just because it was theraputic typing last night so i'm hoping if I can get it out on a daily basis things shouldn't build up and then explode like they did yesterday.

    Thank you again :D

    xx
     
  14. vickidyers

    vickidyers Silver Member

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    I see we have a similar amount of weight to lose and you like me are quite tall!

    I have size 11 feet (and I'm wearing steel toecaps at the moment) so here I go with the big kick.......!

    I can only talk from personal experience, but as a tall person I struggle to find clothes to fit, not helped by the fact I also need a massive size. It's not just the size I am, its the health issues also; my poor knees are struggling to carry over 10 stone each. I'm only 34, but if I carry on at the rate I was I could end up being 30stone by the time I'm 40 and thats NOT going to happen!

    Hopefully like me you are proud of your height and we are 'proper' woman with a real amount of weight to lose... forget those 'I lost 1 1/2 stone with SW and I feel great' types as they stand there in the magazine at a size 8 and 5'3"!! I have a goal of 16 stone at the moment, I know that seems high, but I can re-evaluate when I get there as any more than that just seems to far to go. I'm just going to keep plodding away until I get there. I had a bad day on Friday and so nearly let the weekend fall apart because of it, but I woke up Saturday morning and stayed strong... one day (or one buttered sandwich) does not wreck the week

    Give your self an ego boost, by finding something that weighs around 2 stone, you will be amazed at how heavy that is... then try to imagine walking around with that again. You have done great so far... so *kick* *kick* keep going with me!!! ;)
     
  15. scoobydoo2009

    scoobydoo2009 Full Member

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    i know how you feel i dont have a lot to loose but im cheating a lot and getting down because im not seeing results,

    you have lost 2 stone and you must feel proud for doing that! well done,

    id set smaller goals just 2 lbs is enough and if you do that its great,

    sending you hugs:553:
     
  16. Annya

    Annya Slimming tortoise :o)

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    Hey there Stack - I am a lover of New Rock boots and they delivery a MEGA boot - so here it comes:asskick: - and have a wee spank too for good measure :whoopass:

    Seriously though, I am another one that can relate to your predicament. I am an incredibly slow loser and avoid reading some posts simply because they depress me so much and make me feel like such a failure that I wonder if it is all worth it :(

    However, I don't want to be a fat bird any more and the only way not to be is to get my head down and lose the weight as fast as my body will allow me.

    I have been overweight or obese most of my adult life and had a miserable time at school because of it. I have lost count of the amount of people who have told me I am such a pretty girl, its just a pity I am fat (I ruddy hate people sometimes!).

    I think the biggest motivator for me now though is the fact that I turned 52 last week and my Mum died as a direct result of her obesity aged only 59. I am a dead ringer for my Mum and I don't want to end up the same way she did. She too hated her weight, but instead of dealing with it she headed for the bread bin and just got progessively bigger and bigger.

    I WILL be different, and I WILL lose the weight. I am setting myself really small targets - I consider a one pound per week weight loss a real achievement and it has (largely) kept me on the straight and narrow. I have bad weeks where I maintain or even gain but all you can do is take it on the chin and get back on track.

    I am sending you all the postive vibes :vibes: and cyberhugs :hug99: I can muster. Stick with it honey - we will all get there in the end. Try to focus on how good you will feel when you do and try not to dwell too much on how/when it will happen.
     
  17. Chezzg

    Chezzg Full Member

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    Stackhead, move away from how much you have to go and look at how far you have come! 2 stone is no easy feat!!!! Break what's left down into realistic bits for yourself. Previously when I've lost weight, I only ever managed 1 1/2 stone and then I hit a dead end and gave up! Not this time though!!! I am only concentrating on 7lbs at a time, as when I look at the full amount of what I want to lose, I just can't see myself doing it!!!! We're all here for you. Keep going!!! You can do it!!!!! Xx
     
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  19. Shirleen

    Shirleen Gold Member

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    My amazing friend who has lost 117lb with WW has never had a day off! ( I know I want to slap her too) she says she looks at it like this, its a new way of living, if she were a vegetarian she wouldn't have a steak on a Saturday night! I'm trying to see it that way!
    last night I was feeling down as I only lost 1/2lb despite effort, but I know I can do it and if I'm honest I haven't been as good as I was in the beginning!

    So no boot from me, but I will link arms with you and join you on the journey!
    Happy Slimming x
     
  20. Stackhead

    Stackhead Slow and steady...

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    That is a fantastic way of looking at it! I would never had thought about the whole weight loss journey like that.

    I think as we lose the weight we get complacent and allow our little cheats and days off until eventually we're stuck with our old habits again. I don't want that to happen. I really don't.

    So I will gladly link arms with you Shirleen and lets skip (get some body magic in!) :D

    xx
     
  21. bugsbunny2000

    bugsbunny2000 Proud to be a LOSER :)

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    Hey Stackhead,

    Firstly, 2 stone? You need to give yourself the biggest pat on the back! And to lose it in only 7 months?! If you think about it, that's pretty amazing. That's 4lb a month, so 1lb a week... which according to SW is what you should be losing. I think people just have different bodies, whos react quicker to WL. My sister lost 7lb on her first WI :eek: but her weightloss has fluctuated up and down ever since because she is partial to grazing on naughty foods and exercises alot too. But she knows she can lose it if she tried.

    I think that to be able to have a proper social life still, you need to expect a slower WL. If you stuck to it 100% you might still feel deprived. And I know what you mean, I don't have as much weight to lose, but even 17.5lb seems like it's going to take forever. I've planned to lose it by end of october for my graduation... but my body kind of does what i want even when i stick to plan 100%! lol so just have to go with the flow.

    I agree that you shouldn't think of SW as a "DIET" but as a stepping stone into changing your life, changing your eating habits. I eat so much more fruit and veg and salads than I ever did growing up and even within the last few years!! But SW makes me want to try these healthy new recipes! If you continue to lose 1lb a week then in 2 years you will be down to target :) but I'm sure that you can lose more than that a week now you have a new lease of determination :D I think we let the big 9lb losses get to us when we only lose 2lb the next week! I know! The most i've lost is 4lb. But in a month I managed to put on 7.5lb (while not sticking to SW) and undid nearly 4 weeks of hard work!!!

    Keep going!! You are fabulous for losing 2 stone already and I think you can easily reach your target! Well done so far xxxx
     
  22. Shirleen

    Shirleen Gold Member

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    Skipping we go.... My poor knees!!!! Lol
     
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