Struggling with management - advice please

Discussion in 'Lighter Life Forum' started by kitkatkin, 28 January 2008 Social URL.

  1. kitkatkin

    kitkatkin Member

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    Hi, I've lost over 5 stone with LL and started RtM at beginning of December. That's when it all went wrong, Christmas got in the way and then at the start of January I tried to go back on packs and kept falling off the wagon and then binge eating. I went into total rebellious child mode. I had put on a good 12lbs in all. I finally went back to my class on wednesday and decided to just stick to the management programme - I was doing really well and then tonight i have binged again. I now feel bloated and sick as well as disgusted with myself. I go to Birmingham tomorrow for a course for three days (where no doubt they will throw food at me the whole time - they usually do at these things).

    Even though I failed to get back on total abstinence earlier this month, I think I might go back on the packs when I come back on Saturday - I just want to get this extra weight off without the distraction of food for a while. Is this a good idea? I'm currently on trigger weeks at the moment with RtM and I just feel that its a bad idea when I am so fragile around food.

    I know there are a lot of experience RtM and maintenance people out there so I would appreciate some advice.
     
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  3. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

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    I am not experienced....just a new starter myself....but just wanted to show support. :) Hang in there - someone will be a long with good advice!! Keep on keeping on, and you will eventually nail it. There are bound to be errors made a long the way - as long as you pick yourself up and dust yourself off, and remain in control - you'll get there!!! :)<hugs>

    x
     
  4. kitkatkin

    kitkatkin Member

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    Thanks, I think I have pretty much decided in my head what I want to do, I just want it to be Saturday and then I can start again.

    I have been so successful so far and I can stay in control, I just need to sort my head out
     
  5. leesy

    leesy Full Member

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    Hey Kitkatkin,

    I too am in the early stages of RtM, and am finding there are still challenges to be faced. Just stay strong, and remember how far you have come already. Nothing tastes as good as it feels to be rid of your weight - which is something I tell myself whenever I feel tempted.

    I think we all have to learn how best to manage our weight in the long term, how to feel normal I guess, without the guilt of pleasurable eating, or going out. I am starting to understand that balance is important - and I think it was Mrs Lard who said recently in her blog that it is the normal days that really count when you are trying to maintain your weight - the odd slip up or special occaision is not what will slip you up - its how you behave with food in the day to day that really counts. I fully agree with that and am trying hard to put that into practice now within the confines of RtM so that I can make it my tactic for long term success.

    I think perhaps some time on packs may help - although I am not totally in agreement with using packs in the long term to manage weight, if losing the extra you have put on will put you back in the right frame of mind to complete RtM then it is a sensible thing to do. Perhaps you should have a chat with your counsellor and see what they think?

    Good luck, and try to resist as much as possible while you are away - sticking to the general rules and guidance of RtM 80% of the time even will help.

    Take care,

    Leesy
    xox
     
  6. Monkey

    Monkey Full Member

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    Hi KitKatKin

    I'm only on the 4th week of RtM and have lots to learn yet! I've found it hard sticking to the plan 100% (sugar is the devil for me!!), but so far managed to keep to my goal weight...somehow! I think if I put on more than a few pounds that I might go back onto the packs, even if just to get back into ketosis and remove the hunger. However, this is because I'm just at the beginning of my maintenance and a few days abstinence is the best tool I've found at the moment :eek:. If you can ditch the weight you don't want slowly by adjusting your food, then that's even better (and cheaper!).

    All the best
    Monkey
    x
     
  7. Mrs Lard

    Mrs Lard Silver Member

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    Hello Kitkatkin

    I think we corresponded a LONG time ago over on the Highs and Lows of Development! LOL! I totally empathise where you are. And you are NOT alone.

    (Leesy - you are right, I am trying to get to grips with how to nail it and it definitely isn't the odd meal out that causes the weight to creep back on (for me) but the day-in, day-out stuff). Are you keeping YOUR blog, btw?

    Kitkatkin - I think I posted on my blog - sorry, can't remember - about one woman in my Management class. She did Route to Management to the letter - 100%. Incredible but true. And she has kept the weight off. 100% (or with a max gain of 4lbs over Christmas). In fact, she LOST during RtM! She has kept it off for a year. I was quizzing her a lot about what WAS the difference that made the difference and she said following the rules! 100%! She decided to be adaptive child and follow, without question. Some of the rules she found 'silly' but she figured LighterLife had chosen them for a reason.

    I see-sawed (albeit with small weight ranges) throughout Route to Management, didn't follow it properly and then kept promising myself to do it 'perfectly' but it's hard. I could do/can do abstinence, no problem, but food and packs, well, I just couldn't seem to get it together. Over Christmas, I stopped going to class, ate what I wanted and grazed my way through two weeks. Not good. I gained 10lbs. On top of the weight I gained pre-Christmas - it had started to creep up when I stopped going to class.

    Even though I am surprised (but why?!?!?), there is a direct correlation between my attendance and my weight loss/gain. So now class is non-negotiable, even though it's far away and a big commitment to work around. But it's worth it. Just being around women who understand, can share their knowledge and experience - well, you get the picture.

    There is much debate about whether to go back into abstinence and my only advice to you is to say it's only really worth it if you can start over with RtM. My LLC advised me against doing it for the sake of the 10lb gain and, with hindsight, she was right. The problems of food don't go away!!!

    I am going to write another guide about Route to Management because I think it's as mentally tough, if not tougher, than abstinence.

    Of course, there is also the pressure from other people because they think that now your weight has gone, everything is ok. Ditto with the packs; several people have asked me if I am still on those "weird packets"!!!!

    I have written more on RtM than anything else and I really haven't got it cracked. Yet! But I am determined.

    I really wish you well and hope that others can add to this important thread.

    Big kiss and good luck at the course/conference. Run away from the buffet!!

    Mrs Lxxxxxxxxx
     
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  8. x-Katie-x

    x-Katie-x Gold Member

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    Following Mrs L is always a difficult thing to do! I can't help with Management KitKatin as I've never made it there but what I would recommend is you go have a good read of Mrs L's blog - if ever you're going to find anything to help, advise or guide you then you can be sure you'll find it in there.
     
  9. Mrs Lard

    Mrs Lard Silver Member

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    Ahhhh, Katie, you'll make me blush!!! Thank you for such lovely words.

    Just realised that there is a new forum for Route to Management - hooray!! If you look at the top, you can see it there.

    Good luck!!

    Mrs Lxxxxxxxx
     
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