Surfhunny's Countdown to Florida

[Surfhunny]

Fooking hell I've just been supremely brave and decided to confront my scalephobia head on and holy crap I've gained a stone since I was off on the sick in jan/feb gutted gutted gutted!!!

BUT I know the number now, and for now I'm keeping it a secret! It's still not my highest weight by a long chalk BUT it's still very unacceptable!! I needed to go on, I needed the shock and I've made a plan of action. And I'm not going to avoid the scales anymore, I'm not going to let the numbers dictate how I do on the diet, I have no choice but be 100% whether I lose 1lb a week or 5lbs a week.

I know I've said this before and people are probably sick to death of me starting again (and again and again) but from now I'm on SS until I'm at goal!

Please God let me have the strength to do it this time!! I'm not really religious but I need all the help I can get this time!!!

 

[puddy95]

Hi Surfhunny, I have been reading your posts, its so upsetting isn't it when you have to wear something thats uncomfortable, it makes you feel conspicious and miserable, however.....dont be upset,(I know its realy difficult) but be brave and go see your CDC as soon as possible. You have nothing to be ashamed about, like thousands and thousands of people every year who go on a diet, life gets in the way and spoils it, you are no different from all the thousands who start again, take it one day at a time, just get through the day..then the evening...then until the morning...then through the day blah blah, then just get through the first weigh in, then just the following day...you get the gist, give yourself a huge hug, only cos I cant do it from here, tell yourself you deserve to be happy, no i'll tell you honey you deserve to be happy, Im with you every step matey just like all the others.

Keep positive, you can do it, I believe in you

 

[Surfhunny]

Aw thank you Puddy, I appreciate your kind words!! I'm really hoping that the combination of the cr@ppy tight uniforms and finally seeing the number on the scales will give me the push I need!! I'm desperate now!!

 

[Lfc]

Hello smurf, I am new here but I too wear uniform at work and was made to feel disgusting last week I started and was handed a top and she only had a medium (size 12). And because it doesn't fit me she said oh right well I will have to order you a big size but you ARE doing something about your size aren't you?? I had told her I am attending weight class but this attitude really hurt me,,,
I start on Friday and feeling nervous about cd but need to try.
Good luck to you

 

[Surfhunny]

People are horrible Lfc CD is a fab diet once you get in the swing of things and the weight starts coming off!! The reason I've been messing about so much is because I know that as soon as I set my mind to it and do it properly without cheating the weight does come off fast. Good luck and feel free to pop in here from time to time, I'd love to hear how you're getting on!!

 

[Lfc]

Thanks surf glad to be meeting and chatting to people xxx

 

[juju_doll]

Hello luv, sorry to hear you've been having a rough time. I've gone on to Lighterlife and it has been fab, the reason is the support and the CBT stuff. The need to be accountable and weighed by someone is such a motivation. So whether it's your cdc or elsewhere I think the key for me is support. Go for it luv, I feel a hundred times better than i did 2 weeks ago .... xx

 

[cornishkez]

When is your appointment with your CDC then Surf? You have absolutely no reason to be ashamed! None whatsoever, you are no different to 50% of the people on this earth, probably more!

You've been brave and bitten the bullet and gotten on the scales... one call to the CDC and it'll be over and done with! She's there to make money, she'll welcome you back with open arms

 

[Surfhunny]

The scales are up by 2lbs this morning which frustrating because there's no way I've over eaten by 7000 cals this week, that's an extra 1000 cals a day and considering I've had 2 packs and an evening meal I can't see how that's possible

But taking it with a pinch of salt, it's today's starting point, on SS as of today so it has to go down from now on!! It's just added motivation. I think I definitely need to see the numbers on the scales going down to remind me it's working and to stick with it.

I'm giving myself 3 days to try it on my own, if I don't get as far as day 4 without cheating I'll be straight on the phone to my CDC!! I've got stock that needs using up before I go back so I'd ideally like to use all of that first, before I go buying more as money is tight this month (car bleeds me dry )

 

[Surfhunny]

Well day 1 is officially over!!!! I'm going up to bed to read, so I don't think about food and eating! I've got no food in the house to eat if I wanted to anyway!!

Hopefully the scales will show a loss tomorrow, after the gain this morning

 

[*Shanny*]

Well day 1 is officially over!!!! I'm going up to bed to read, so I don't think about food and eating! I've got no food in the house to eat if I wanted to anyway!!

Hopefully the scales will show a loss tomorrow, after the gain this morning

I hope so too Sal x

 

[Surfhunny]

I'm back to my old scale hopping ways Shanny BUT I think its too easy for me to live in denial if I don't look at the weight!

 

[*Shanny*]

I'm back to my old scale hopping ways Shanny BUT I think its too easy for me to live in denial if I don't look at the weight!

I want you to do well now Sal honestly if scale hopping for a few days/weeks so be it.....

I will be happier when you are back with your CDC.. so get finishing your K products, and lets help you start and finish your journey..

xxxx

 

[Surfhunny]

Thank you Shanny xxx

 

[girlygirl1]

We are so hard on ourselves. It's sad but true of most of us. Myself, certainly; my own worst critic. And when it comes to the dreaded diet failure and the concept of cheating the old guilt tapes play over and over in my head at the slightest provocation. Regain is even worse. This triggers emotional pain and guilt.

But I am much better than I once was. One reason for this was that I simply couldn't starve any more, no matter how badly I might want to. Whether it was CD or my own 'take' on a day's low cal food the time came when I just could not hack it any more.

This was where my life turned around for the better! It released me from the pressure I was putting myself under to go on trying to do everything perfectly, and it freed me from the compulsion to at least try to starve. Not all of us can stick to plans that, however good and sound nutritionally, mean we cannot eat regular food. I think some of us just need to 'keep food in the equation' for our mental health. But once you start on the stop-start, stop-restart road it can become the norm. You can become trapped in that cycle, unable to find a way out.

VLCDs are fantastic but honestly they don't suit everyone and there is no shame at all in eventually realising that. I am not saying this is the case with you surf but you seem to be absolutely torturing yourself and I really feel for you.

Good luck hun x

 

[trisha]

Sorry you've been having a rough time surf, getting through the first 3 days is the hardest. I managed 11 days ss without cheating, lost 8 lbs , then had a planned meal off, which was really a ss+/810 at most, but can't get back into ss again AARRGGHH.

But I am determined to get back into ss again, we can do it, take one day at a time.

 

[kellyshines]

Morning surf day 2 is here good luck

I'm hopeful the scales dropped a few pounds to please keep going.

I'm on exante and it's tough I know

 

[Surfhunny]

Thanks Trisha, it's so hard to get momentum back after a planned break. It's my brothers birthday next week and I'm so unsure what to do, itll have to be SS+/810 friendly or I can't go. But he's done CD in the past so he knows how hard it is and will understand.

Kelly the scales were kind this morning, dropped 3lbs so I'm happy! 1 more lb will take me into the next st set, so hopefully by the weekend. It's tough but I have to do this I have no choice, VLCDs are the only diets that I have actually managed to succeed with. I have limited patience and every other diet I've tried takes too long and the plateaus seem to be more frequent and last longer.

I should hit ketosis tomorrow, official weigh in next Wednesday.

 

[*Shanny*]

3 lbs is a lot Sal wow 'you are' doing it Sal, 'you are' taking control again, 'you are' happy with your 3 lbs loss, 'you are' positive that CD will give you the weightloss again... AND 'you are' planning ahead for your brothers birthday..

all in the right direction wouldn't you say??
xxx

 

[Surfhunny]

Yep all in the right direction. On Tuesday i wondered if I'd hit rock bottom, well apparently I hadn't :cry: , things have actually got worse for me, although it means I've got yet another reason to do this now...

Because of my car costing me a fortune last month and yet more needing to be forked out on it I have actually only got enough money left for petrol next week. Not good but it means I can't afford to buy food if I wanted to.

I'll be okay in a couple of months once all my stupid car repairs are done. I wish I could just get rid of that useless heap of cr@p Dads friend has a Chrysler Neon he's selling for £350, it's reliable and fully taxed and tested but I just can't afford it stupid car loan I hate having financial worries like this it scares the hell out of me!! I'm terrified that I'm not going to cope once we have our pay cut, if I'm just scraping by now. sorry for offloading all this none diet related stuff but I'm scared and I needed to share it with someone.