The Highs and Lows of Development

Oh yes, forgot to say (and am going to blog about this)

I caught the end of a programme about the oldest people in the world; more than one, I think, said they woke up with a clear purpose each day.

That really struck a chord with me.

Then at the weekend, we had a chat here on minis with someone (Nixx) who has also stayed abstinent. How had she done it, I asked? Clear goal, she said (like Sarah).

In Foundation we set smart goals, in RtM we're supposed to set goals (still not done week one homework!) and so I think we might help ourselves to set mini goals for the day or set a clear purpose for the day and maybe tie it in with an affirmation.

I am sure everyone has posted about this so apologies if I am repeating great wisdom. Just something to add in the strategy suitcase!

Mrs Lxxxxxxxxxx
 
A big thanks to you all for your support. I've copied and pasted your comments onto word and will print off and paste into my scrapbook.

This morning continued badly and I had a blood test and then ended up at Starbucks and then Costa for two lots of 'post-blood test treats'.

Before I got into work and logged on to minis (naughty!) I had a good talking to myself. Since one of the big issues for me right now is being broke, I cannot afford to be eating on top of my LL commitments. So back to abstinence for two good reasons!

I went to RPM last night to try to get some of the carbohydrate/glycogen out of my system (actually I had planned to go anyway before the binge but made sure I went for this reason). Despite this, with weigh in tonight, I will gain but I accept that.

This week could see me getting back on track. I only have Thursday to get through and that afternoon I have a Clarins body treatment/massage. Then on Friday we're off to North Devon for the bank holiday. I know that weekends away can be difficult times for others but I actually I find them easier to cope with than day to day problems. I'll take my new personal development for dummies book with me and the green book and my goal mapping printouts and spend some of the time focusing on me. The rest of the time I want to be walking on the beautiful coastline and soaking up gorgeousness.

In a rare moment of clarity I realise that a lot of things have coincided this week: THAT time of the month, working my notice at the job I hate, bank withdrawing my OD. It's no wonder I'm under pressure. This BH weekend is coming at just the right time. A bit of space and some time to relax.

Thanks again! This support means so much to me.:thankyou:
 
Cerulean said:
We should call this the playground thread - it's swings, roundabouts, seesaws and rollercoasters, isn't it?

Oh - and bless Beechy - did you know he's being removed from the LL DVDs due to an unfounded tabloid scandal? Beechy really knows his stuff and was the best thing about the DVDs - I should look up his stuff at the library.
Click to expand...

I read this with interest. I started LL in February, and have never seen dear old Beechy, although I do know of him through the TV. We had to sit through the very uninspiring (IMHO) Mandy Cassidy. She did/does nothing for me, more than act much as a grain of sand does with an oyster!! Hey maybe thats it!! I am going to become a pearl!!!

Loving this thread everyone, so much useful stuff and I hadnt even thought of printing it for my scrapbook, Sandra!! What a great idea!!
 
hey pepys! Well I have now offically eaten! Because I want to loose more but not on LL (will go back to WW) I am doing an accelerated management prog and (touch wood) so far so good! My tummy feels quite full but had minute portions of tuna steak (it was BLISS!), cottage cheese & a bit of salad; tablepoon of yog & banana & blueberry with tsp honey and two pieces of G&B! With the exception of the last bit the rest was yummy & actually thought the honey & G&B were too sweet so my tastes have def changed! I also dont want more which is good because I worried that I would want to carry on eating! Tesco shopping was VERY odd as I've not done any food shopping for me for months but it was also expensive! Think I'll go for the next few weeks and go on to WW....hang in there girls & have a blissful weekend Sandra. Big hugs!
 
Hey everyone

Lots of posts to comment on :D

Re the 'when do you take the plunge into management?' issue...
So this is the deal for me. Original target 11.7st - moved it to 10.7st in my last couple of weeks in Foundation. As I said earlier, I have NEVER been able to get this goal weight setting sorted. I just don't know how I'm going to look and feel at 11st 7. let alone 10st 7. I'm a shade under 5ft8 so that's definitely the range to be in, but the exact number? Haven't got a clue.

Helen - you asked if I was planning on losing more...
Well, when I get to 11st 7 and think that I do want to lose more then the plan will be to lose it in RtM. I think at this stage I'm very flexible around what my RtM will look like, flexible in terms of an extended week 1 and 2 that is. I'm definitely not naive about the challenges of RtM (Mrs L and Cerulean both providing SO much fabulous insight on that front just now :)) I'm scared, anxious, full of anticipation and ready for it. My low boredom threshold is legendary - god knows how I've stuck with Development for as long as I have to be honest.

My lifestyle has already changed beyond recognition really. I put together a whole team of external support bods in place at the start of Foundation - gym, personal training, my lovely and fabulous food lady who I see every week for counselling and advice, reflexology, and of course hanging out here...I really do have the busiest week imaginable! And then fitting my friends in around that, and getting some me time - oh and my job, (which is pretty huge) well it's all been jam packed. But overall, it's transformed how I spend my week. My point is that I really think I have the support network set up in such a way that I can capitalise on all of that in RtM. I'm really looking forward to being able to increase my training. I cant do that just now on 500cals a day. I'm definitely doing the maximum just now. But just on the subject of training, the work is really starting to pay off. So far the gym and training has all been about losing weight - now I can see definition and real shape changing results, I'm currently moving to another level. It's becoming quite addictive! But in a good way. I'm absolutely loving it.

Overall I'm pretty certain that yes, you should go as low as you can go before RtM (My LLC definitely thinks this) But I'm not sure that that's the *only* answer, and I feel I've got to give it a go.


ISOM - when did this all happen??? Food! WW's!!? You certainly sound very focused on the LL exit route :) Please keep us fully updated!

Sandra - your BH break sounds great :) I too am heading off on Friday morning for 4 days in the sun. Staying with some friends who are the host-iest of all hosts and total foodies. I feel challenges on the horizon!

Mrs L - I'm heading over to the Arms to read all about the 90% RtM success rate!

Sarah - how was your Wednesday? Hope you got through it ok and blew up the Wednesday demons :D

Abstinence reigns this week for me. Hoping the final countdown will keep me in full angelic state!
 
You know what? Development sucks!

I've had 4 weeks in a new developers group because my other group all went on management. It has started to dwindle until last night there were 4 of us and two of those are going to start management next week!

It's starting to feel like one of those dodgy horror movies where one by one people go missing.:hide:

My LLC is away on holiday and the locum said she is going to talk to her about a new way of structuring the groups. Obviously she has no authority to change thigns herself but I think she is generally right to suggest change. There should be a developers only night and when you go into development, you join that group. It will mean new people starting and leaving but will also mean there is actually a group that continues on...

I'm feeling a bit lost at sea :character00117:because I have a fair way to go (due to my dilly-dallying) and I need the support of some other long-timers. Even my friends here at minis and via blogs are all either doing management or about to start... I'm being left behind.:cry:

As for my result last night :scale:- I gained 2lbs but I was calm about that as I knew it was going to happen and had plenty of time to prepare for it. In the end I was a bit surprised it wasn't more. The four of us that were there last night had all eaten during the week. But we have all committed to a 100% week. I'm doing 'back to basics' where I've only ordered 3 nut crunch bars and the rest shakes and soups. I'm pretending it's week one and won't have a bar until Monday.

I'm feeling okay about that actually because it's the worst day of that time of the month today and I really want sweet things. So I've had some sweet coffee :coffee:and a strawberry shake. Strawberry shake number 2 is due in a couple of hours. That should keep me away from the biscuits in the kitchen at work...:innocent0002:
 
Hey Developers...

Well - I have a moment to record...I'm off to the sunshine tomorrow and had to face a big challenge today - bikini shopping.
I don't really know where to start. I've just tried on my gorgeous size 14 bikini and whilst I'm no Kate Moss, I look quite simply - AMAZING! I do! When I tried it on 2 things happened. Firstly the realisation that I definitely should've bought a size 12 and then secondly, I just burst into tears. I've not cried once throughout LL and once I started I just couldn't stop.
I knew I was fighting the demons this week, and winning. I knew I was turning a corner, without really knowing why, but I was just going with it. I knew that things were just feeling different - dare I say, like the focus I had in Foundation...and then I got on the scales, and sure enough, I've finally - FINALLY broken through the 13st barrier (cue more tears)

I'm spent!

Today when I was shopping I felt the oh so familiar demons start to attack and I just went with it. I know that this time last week I probably would've given in, but today, I didn't. I really focused on what the voices were saying and how I was feeling and I just went with it. I'm so proud of myself.

So back to the bikini. The stomach area still has a considerable way to go - no doubt about that. But my upper body looks positively sculptured. I just cant get over it. The pins are looking great - 19" thighs almost there.


I'm just over the moon with the body and mind progress. Officially recording this as my best Development day/moment to date.

:D
 
Sandra
You are not alone! We're here! :character00100:

I know that feeling of 'I still have a long way to go' so so so well, and yes, I probably would be done by now if I hadn't spent the last 2 months messing around. But you're still with it and you're doing brilliantly.

I've not had a Developers group - there has been one but I've not been able to attend - and I'm sure that's not helped. The whole hanging in limbo of Development is definitely not helped by the small groups and the movement of people, it's really distracting and disruptive.

I'm here for at least another 6 weeks, and our recent Mini movers into RtM will continue to post and support us here so please don't think you're alone because you definitely are not :D

Let's crack on. We're in it, we're doing it, today has been a massive high for me - can't remember the last one I had, so it CAN be done...the highs are definitely out there for the taking.

Keep posting :D
 
I have to say I feel quite lucky in development, although the weight loss has been a bit slow. My LLC is really rather good. We had 10 of us in last weeks group and our groups is quite structured. She runs a four week plan which is the journey, ego states, must/should/ought parent messages and the free child. The only thing is that I will definately be there for more than four weeks so I expect it may become repetitive.
 
It's almost the weekend.

Just wishing everyone a lovely break and let's go for gold in the abstinence/sticking to plan regime.

Big kiss.

Mrs L (at this rate may go back to Development - can you believe it?!?!?) xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

PS Sandra - hope you are ok and had a better day. Big hug!
 
Hi TG and Helen thank you both for the welcome I started LL on 14th March and up to last Tuesday have lost 5st 8lbs but its getting harder I ate a meal in the evening on holiday last month so really hard to stay totally abstinent now but Im trying. Hope your all doing better lots of love Mandy x.
 
Hi Developers,
I've just come back from hols and just catching up. Must say I'm feeling a bit gutted today, I went away for an interview just before my hols - to be a LLC actually, and just got back last night to find a rejection letter in the post box.

It is my second rejection in a month. The first was from my current work where I didn't even merit an interview despite working there for 17 years. I feel quite kicked in the stomach from both of them really.

But I am sooo relieved to say I didn't even think of reacting with food. Still in my miraculous little world of abstinence.

Just thinking what to do with my life now. Hopefully a day out at the village show today will buck me up - the dog might win a rosette again. Or maybe she will attack a little terrier like she did once before and have to be removed from the ring. Don't know which one I would enjoy the most!

Claire
 
Dear Claire

Just checking in and saw your post. First, your comment about the dog made me laugh! What sort of dog have you got? Mine's a chocolate Labrador and I've only been able to enter her for one show - she 's rescue, what can you say?!

Second, I want to give you a BIG round of applause for not giving into food after two rejections. Obviously, can't comment on current employer, suffice to say it's just bad manners. But a rejection from LL??? How come? Am a bit amazed, particularly when you think of number of complaints on here about c**p counsellors (not all LLCs are c**p, just in case any of you are reading - I LOVE mine!).

But, cheesy and corny as it sounds, as one door closes, an even bigger one opens!

So, well done, you are abstinent. That is AWESOME! And let us know how the dog got on.

In the meantime, how is everyone else? I went a bit (well, massively!) crazy - confectioners' convention crazy - on Thursday/Friday but (yes, an excuse) I did pull an all nighter for work - stayed up until 4am. Sort of back in the zone - sort of.

Take care.

Mrs Lxxxxxxxx
 
Hi Mrs L and everyone else,

We've got a collie and she was very well behaved this year. I took her into the ring for the third round and as I stood there I felt really calm and serene, knowing I wasn't being stared at because of my size, I felt like I looked normal! In fact I felt like I looked slim. It was great. And we won a 4th place rosette! Which believe me is good because competition at these things is fierce.

As for the LL interview, I passed the telephone interview and had to go down for an all day assessment. It was really tough. No one to one interviews, just lots of group situations where you are observed interacting with other prospective counsellors. And you are constantly monitored and assessed, with no feedback or intervention. I think they are looking for certain psychological profiles and if you don't fit then thats it!

Anyway, I feel like another door is going to open too. It is as if I've got this new me and I don't know what to do with her.

Have a good week everyone. Stay strong, focus on your goals.

Claire
 
That's interesting JDI. Chin up.

I was recently rejected for a basic admin job at LL despite the fact I am a manager in education at the moment and could have done the job with my eyes closed. I challenged the fact I didn't even warrant an interview and the HR person admitted in writing (email) that they made all kinds of assumptions about me and my intentions.

So I would say their administrative/personnel practices aren't quite as positive as the programme!

Still, it might be a blessing in disguise - mine was - as I got a brilliant new job which I start on 1st October. Much better than the LL opportunity.

Have a rethink and assess what's important to you and keep trying...
 
Just Do it

Sorry you are having a tough time of it recently. I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason even if that reason isn't apparent at the time. I am sure whatever you are supposed to do with your career is just around the corner and will be much better for you in the long run.
I just wanted to ask out of interest - as I was also umming and ahhing about becoming an LLC. Did you get your finances in place before applying to LL or did you try to get through the interviews first?
I have been on these "recruitment days" for other positions in the past and they are far more scary than a one on one situation aren't they? Like you said, you get no feedback and have no idea what it is they are looking for, plus you feel "watched" for the entire experience. If I do decide to go for it (making my decision once I have done more research after Christmas) - I will be a nervous wreck. What was the phone interview like ?

Laura
 
Hi Laura,
Your ticker seems to be adding up really well! I haven't seen it for a while.

I didn't have any finace in place, I thought I'd see how I got on at the interviews. The telephone interview was quite lengthy. At the end it was one of those Say the first word that comes into your head sessions.

At least they told me I had progressed to the next stage at the end of the call. You only get to that stage if you have agreed an area to have your LL meetings in. I thought it was a bit odd that at the recruitment day they never said how long it would take for them to let you know the result, I had to ask that. But you get to talk to a counsellor and area sales rep about the business side.

Good luck if you decide to go for it.

Claire
 
Thanks for the info Claire. I really would like to give it a go - but at the moment I am just focussed on finishing my LL journey and will research everything after that.
You are speeding along yourself with your weightloss - not far at all to go now.
Hope you have a good week
Laura
 
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