This is me! (Management diary)

[Spanglymum]

Well... feeling a bit more "centred" today. I'm still annoyed, but am going to use my annoyance constructively I think. I was pondering how best to handle it on the drive in this morning and reckon I'll bring it up as one of a number of things that are inter-related at work that I'm finding frustrating. I'll also make suggestions about how things could be improved, as I know myself that having whingeing staff who don't make useful suggestions is deeply irritating!! I hope we'll then be able to reach a positive outcome... watch this space. Can't do it today as my boss is out of the office on an off-site meeting all day, but I will do it the next time he and I have a 1:1.

Bit frustrated about my slow progress with packs and getting back to goal weight. I'm not really sure what's going on there. The bingo wings just don't seem to want to go this time!! Best get back on with the kettlebells. Everything went out of whack when I was in the US and I've been finding it difficult to get back into my exercise groove since getting home. The plan is to do one kettlebell session this week and one swim next week: achievable goals! I fully expect to over-achieve on them, but I know how much pressure I put myself under and am learning (very slowly) that gentle self-encouragement is what I need.

I'm interested that you didn't find IF useful, nzmegs. I was hoping it might be a way for me to manage my weight effectively with "real" food, not packs... I'm still thinking I'll try it at some point though. I want to get closer to my goal weight though before leaving the security of packs, even if it's taking me forever this time. I reckon it really must be the soya milk. I'm pretty generous with it, and even though I use unsweetened, the calorie content isn't negligible.

Apart from the soya milk I've stuck to sns 100% - no deviations at all for the past fortnight - but my clothes just aren't getting any looser. I don't understand it. I haven't weighed myself since the hospital as I just found the "overweight" label mind-blowingly depressing - but maybe I should?

 

[nzmegs]

I think that weighing yourself might be a good idea. I am often surprised at how much I weigh even on "fat" days. Somehow i still manage not to have put on weight. But make sure you are in a good place when you do it and that whatever the result you know you will stick with things. See the hospital label as a challenge rahter than being depressing. make sure that the next time you go, you can show them that your way of eating works and that you have comfortably and easily dropped back down to a so called normal weight range.

Maybe try cutting out the milk for a few days and up your water. Just so you know that you are doing everything right before you decide it isn't working.

IF would have worked if I had my diet sorted. it was the fact I was still eating sugar which made me not lose weight. I thought i could eat anything and as much as I wanted within the eating window. Unfortunately that dream didn't come true!

My friend did it though and found it quite successful. But she just ate one big meal a day so her calories dropped significantly.

nice new picture - by the way!

 

[Spanglymum]

Thanks re the photo - I quite like it

Well I took the bull by the horns yesterday and had a frank discussion with the person involved - which was brilliant. Not very comfortable - but really really worthwhile. Feel so much better - partly for having the conversation, but mostly because I was in control of the situation, which is great, especially given how rubbish I felt about it earlier in the week.

I haven't weighed myself yet... am psyching myself up for it. I do need to do it though as I have another hospital appointment on Monday and they will weigh me there (sigh). I've suggested to my husband that I cut out soya milk for the next couple of weeks as a last-ditch attempt. I can't see how it could possibly be affecting my losses but I can't see what else it is. He doesn't get it either, but is being brilliantly supportive.

If I can just get back to my goal weight I'm going to try IF. I can see it working for me if I keep to my previous low-carb regime. Everything started going to pot once I reached a tipping point with carbs - then it was like I was a thing possessed! In fact, given the way the primitive parts of the brain (including the reward centres) work, I think that's a fair comment!

Just want to get this last bit of spare tyre OFF!!!!

 

[nzmegs]

I have just watched The men who made us fat - it was brilliant. basically Gary Taubes condensed into an hour. Have you seen it yet? How much longer can the low fat messgae be pushed down our throats? it seems to me that the tide is turning. Please let it be the case. then i can finally be less of a weirdo for not wanting to eat sugar.

 

[Spanglymum]

Yes! I watched it last night. Couldn't resist brief outbursts of "Yessss!" and punching the air triumphantly at various points. It felt a bit strange seeing some of my low carb heroes on the telly - but brilliant at the same time .

I loved the bit about the food industry inventing the concept of snacking. Well, quite! I can remember those "finger of fudge" and "milky way" adverts like it was yesterday. How times have changed. Sweets used to be a Saturday treat - not scattered liberally through every day. And chocolate was VERY special - it cost a lot of pocket money and didn't last very long, so I used to buy penny (and half-penny - that's how old I am!) tray sweets instead.

I sometimes feel I'm the only mum locally who actually cares about carbs - sugar in particular - rather than fats, and that I must be weird. I do give sweets and sugary things to my children - I feel they are part of life and to restrict them completely would make them even more exotic and disproportionately appealing - but they have them after meals, so I know they're not revving up their insulin production and/or eating them instead of food with nutritional value. It's funny though, because often they want what Mummy's having instead .

I've been trying to get hold of "pure, white and deadly", which was mentioned during the programme, but it's out of print. I can pay to download it from the British Library but they rather unhelpfully don't say exactly how much it will cost. So I've emailed my local library to see if they can borrow it for me.

 

[nzmegs]

You might find it comes back into print. I would love to read it too - but I have also be unable to find it. let me know how you get on.

I know how you feel about feeding kids sugar. I was chatting to my daughter on the way home today, telling her about the programme. She understand that sugar is bad for her and why , so I figured she would be interested. However, it was the other Mums who turned their heads to see what nonsense I was spouting... My kids have sweets once a week and just one item (a chocolate bar or a small bag of sweets). However I know my son eats more than this with his pocket money when I am not around. the only thing I am thankful for is the fact that neither of them like soft drinks and prefer water or sugar free squash. My daughter has never even tried Coke...

My husband and kids also have a dessert (an iced lolly or icecream) after dinner on most nights. I never have it although strawberries and cream have been a treat for me lately.

When I was a kid I had white bread and sugar sandwiches - seriously! I also ate condensed milk from the tin and swirled golden syrup over my cereal...My teeth are full of cavities and my metabolism is ruined. thanks Mum! Oh how we have learned better - oh, hang on - we haven't. things are as bad as ever, if not worse!

 

[Spanglymum]

Well, really struggling. No movement on the scales for two weeks, despite sticking to it 100%. Only thing I can think of is that coke zero/dr pepper zero is stalling me. I didn't have anything like that when I did LL - but because it's allowed on sns I've let myself have it. Could it be completely stopping my weight loss? Seems impossible, but I can't think of any other explanation!

I'm really bored of packs and trying to lose this same stone over and over and over again. I feel like such a failure.

Hmm. Need to give myself some encouragement, kindness and support!

 

[Debbi8489]

Hi Spangly

How are you missus? Been MIA for soooo long. Hope you're doing OK

Debbi xx

 

[Spanglymum]

Hi debbi. Good to hear from you! I've been struggling big time. But yesterday got my resolve back. Kind of hit a low point and am bouncing back again. Day two and feel in the zone. How are you?

 

[Debbi8489]

Good thanks

Bored with losing the same stone over and over again lol. But, I've lost 4.5lbs so far (WI in Sat) so it shouldnt take me too long. Bit disappointing as I lost a stone in a week just before my holidays. Hey ho.

We have a new addition to the family. Dougal, our gorgeous little westie rescue puppy came to us on Monday. I have been out and about all week in the rain with him lol. He is just adorable! He is lying at my feet, snoozing at the moment, completely exhausted, bless. But I havent done my running this week as I dont want to leave him!!! We need to get into our routine I wonder if he can run with me?? Hmmm

Are you still managing your swimming?

 

[Spanglymum]

Swam once this week, which isn't bad considering my work schedule, which has been insane. Still trying to sort out a reasonable work/life balance, which isn't easy with four hours of commuting a day! Can't wait for the office to relocate - some time in 2014.

Sticking to the plan and feel better for it. But tomorrow have accepted a dinner invitation with my mum. She lives alone and has been asking me for ages and I kept stalling, wanting to get to my goal weight first. Then I slapped myself about the head for being so selfish!

Will stick to low carb as much as I can. Really want to stop faffing about and get back to goal. I know what you mean about losing the same stone. I read some interesting stuff about that and hormones the other day... Validating the difficulty of keeping that last stone off. Will post a link when I'm back on the pc - on iPod at moment.

 

[Julz]

Good thanks

Bored with losing the same stone over and over again lol. But, I've lost 4.5lbs so far (WI in Sat) so it shouldnt take me too long. Bit disappointing as I lost a stone in a week just before my holidays. Hey ho.

We have a new addition to the family. Dougal, our gorgeous little westie rescue puppy came to us on Monday. I have been out and about all week in the rain with him lol. He is just adorable! He is lying at my feet, snoozing at the moment, completely exhausted, bless. But I havent done my running this week as I dont want to leave him!!! We need to get into our routine I wonder if he can run with me?? Hmmm

Are you still managing your swimming?

Piccies please
Jx

 

[Spanglymum]

Off for some pampering of sorts today. I got a voucher for teeth whitening a while ago (I have horrible teeth - very healthy but yellow and crooked. I wasn't "allowed" braces when I was younger because it was "just vanity"!!!) Anyway... went to the dentist earlier this week for a check up and my teeth and gums are in A1 condition (despite looking ugly) so off to get my toothypegs brightened today. Quite excited! (Hope I don't end up doing a Ross from Friends though!)

Dinner with Mum last night was lovely and not too off-road (the main was seabass with samphire and green beans). Had a small amount of bread as well - but basically not too bad!

 

[Debbi8489]

Piccies please
Jx

Lol, OK. Will try to post one here. if not, will stick on my profile

Swam once this week, which isn't bad considering my work schedule, which has been insane. Still trying to sort out a reasonable work/life balance, which isn't easy with four hours of commuting a day! Can't wait for the office to relocate - some time in 2014.

Sticking to the plan and feel better for it. But tomorrow have accepted a dinner invitation with my mum. She lives alone and has been asking me for ages and I kept stalling, wanting to get to my goal weight first. Then I slapped myself about the head for being so selfish!

Will stick to low carb as much as I can. Really want to stop faffing about and get back to goal. I know what you mean about losing the same stone. I read some interesting stuff about that and hormones the other day... Validating the difficulty of keeping that last stone off. Will post a link when I'm back on the pc - on iPod at moment.

I'm glad your meal with Mum went well. It was my nephew's birthday tea yesterday. I succumbed to Mum's lovely buffet *sigh*

 

[Julz]

Looks lovely!
Jx

 

[Spanglymum]

What a sweetie!!

 

[Spanglymum]

Weighed myself

Ugh.

Right. Need to pull myself together and not panic!! Then decide sensibly what to do...

Why am I gaining?!

 

[Spanglymum]

All wired up and ready for my sleep apnoea test. Feel like ET, with my index finger glowing red from the thing that measures the oxygen in your blood. Cool! Made me smile anyway!

Unlikely to have apnoea but trying to rule it out as the cause of my 'excessive daytime sleepiness'. The consultant reckons I'm probably just doing too much and therefore knackered, but worth ruling apnoea out. Next stop: lupus tests.

Well... At least it's distracting me from my weight.

Had big chat with hubby tonight. Poor man. He's so supportive, despite never having a weight problem himself. Anyway. I'm going back on low carb/Paleo. I need to eat! Sheesh.

 

[Clarabow]

Low carb is definitely the way to go. Have you chosen a weight that is too low for you to maintain do you think ?

Keep up the journey xx

 

[Spanglymum]

Yes, clara - I think you're probably right - on both counts!

I took my hubby to the hospital today for his yearly treatment (he has monthly ones as well - it's complicated MS stuff) - and dropped off my apnoea test (which unfortunately was at a completely different hospital on the other side of town) and then went to Sainsbury's to get some low carb bits. Got some greens, some lettuce, some prawns, some salmon trimmings (cheapest way to buy salmon apart from tinned I think!), eggs and kidney (I know few people like them but I do )

Am looking forward to an omelette and lettuce for lunch. Nom!

Also looking forward to having the house to myself for a few hours. Bliss! I've taken the day off because of needed to take DH to the hospital and pick him up later after surgery - which means I can have a totally guilt-free lazy, QUIET day. (Of course I'm already thinking, "well, I could just do XYZ... I've got time to do..." etc - but the idea was to have TIME OFF!!)