What I need - thinking of me

Discussion in 'Lighter Life Forum' started by Cerulean, 24 July 2007 Social URL.

  1. Cerulean

    Cerulean Gold Member

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    Diet:
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    Hello everyone, and thanks for all the lovely comments and things - especially about my blog which I know I haven't updated very recently and I will be concentrating on - and I know extrapounds prevents you from commenting unless you have an extrapounds blog yourself - so it's a bit selfish of me to stay there - so I will be moving the blog next week (hopefully!) to somewhere more sensible.

    Anyway - I had a really weird day today - I feel hideously overwhelmed but I've had a couple of quiet victories to do with comfort eating - after my panic at work the first thing I could think of to calm me was hot sugary tea - then on the way home I thought about pizza - neither of those thoughts were actually attached to the food - I was distant from the thought of the food - I just saw the thoughts and felt no sense of need or longing whatsoever - which is such a new thing for me I needed to make a quick note of it here.

    And then there was the lightbulb - the one I have been waiting for - the one I needed to hear before I knew I was ready for management. It ran along these lines - I felt it stronger than I can word it right now - I'm sure I'll get better words later.

    'Food will not change the situation - now you know this, you are free from it. You will never need to turn to food for comfort again. You don't have to be wary of it any more, you have let it go. You have won.'

    I can hear some of you going 'yes but' but I did do a lot of the other work covered in management on myself last year. I decided that I would set myself free from things - and a horrible day like today where I felt choked up by everything else in my life and stupid inconsequential things and some of the more important things - well - it just made me realise, if I move into management with a suspicious eye - well - food and I are never going to have a normal relationship and that was always the problem - we've been enemies as well as bosom buddies for years and it should be neither. It's just food. I have choice from now on. I am abstinent and I'm okay with that - even on a horrible day.

    I have a lot of things to get done - and that scares me - and so I may not be here as much for a while whilst I get my head round the detail behind all this. I will write it up, I promise and I'm sorry if I don't have time to say thank you to everyone all the time - but I really need the time for me and I know that this is one place where that feeling will definitely be understood.

    So I am ready for management - but as the wisdom teeth come out next Thurs there's no point in starting today as I would prefer to stick to the LL liquid diet for the first week after the op as a matter of convenience and lack of effort - if I'm in pain I'm not going to want to be bothered about preparing meals and thinking about it and the like - and I didn;t lose an ounce this week so this is a great opportunity to definitely lose the last half stone to get me into the 9s - the magic number I thought I would never see again. Once I see that, then I can have my first piece of John Dory.
     
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  3. Mrs Lard

    Mrs Lard Silver Member

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    What can I say? Well done? Way to go? Incredible? Fantastic? Bloomin' marvellous?

    Whatever I write here won't adequately reflect my acknowledgement of what you have achieved. I'm in awe; what a phenomenal end to this stage (of your journey).

    It's a brave new world and you'll be doing it without (wisdom) teeth but with more wisdom than ever before. Sorry, a cheesy pun but I thought you might like it!

    Awesome! Awesome! Awesome! And if you don't post before Management, enjoy the John Dory. Every single morsel.

    Big kiss.

    Mrs Lxxxxxxxxxx
     
  4. bridejoo

    bridejoo Member

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    I've read loads of your posts - I'm a bit of a lurker here at the moment still. I feel really inspired by you and everything you have achieved.
    You are amazing!
    Oh and I wanted to say Re: wisdom teeth... I had 2 out last November and I suffered terribly as I've never been good with teeth stuff. I didn't eat for about 4 days and when I began to eat again, it was only a few spoons of soup and ice cream, milkshakes and smoothies (just what you want hey!) and after my week off work - I'd lost 7lbs!
    Good luck with everything!
    Julie xxx
     
  5. In search of me

    In search of me Silver Member

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    Well done & congratulations in bucketloads!! Good idea re sticking with shakes after teeth - try & have some with ice in blender as that will also sooth (I have one of those cockatily things that makes them like a Mr Whippy!!! delish!!) if you are feeling achy! Not sure what ALL the post meant but possibly because I feel tied & brain fuzzy today (made a complete tit of myself in a meeting that I was chairing...oh well!!)...post when you feel able & are sussed yourself but huge squidgy well done hug while your brain whirrs!
     
  6. Cerulean

    Cerulean Gold Member

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    Start Weight:
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    Current Weight:
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    Goal Weight:
    10st5lb
    Lost(%):
    5st6lb(31.67%)
    Diet:
    CD Step 5/Low GI
    ISOM - thanks for your lovely words :)

    Do you know, I hardly ever have any of my packs cold! I'm rather looking forward to banana and vanilla shakes (I'm going to get some straws and cocktail umbrellas ;) ) and I've bought loads of lolly moulds so that I can have a constant supply of water flavouring lollies!
     
  7. In search of me

    In search of me Silver Member

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    My absolute pleasure! It really is a joy to see the transformation...You get yummy cocktail sticks - could even have a shake in a cocktail glass!! The LL cocktail party lol!! I love banana & strawberry shake cold - so east when you're out or in a rush!! The versatile shake!!! Keep us posted & look forward to actually being able to post on your blog!!
     
  8. Tiger Girl

    Tiger Girl Full Member

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    Hey Cerulean
    Fabulous lightbulb!
    Please keep on posting pre teeth - we'll miss you when you're not here. Should we set up a hospital bed thread with a load of TLC posts? :D
     
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