Why cheat??????

[shellreed2011]

i have tried many a diet too lesley and this one does seem to work but its really hard and it will probably get even harder and i have had an egg or two but that doesnt make me a cheat the other girls on here get so upset when they slip up and i can tell you now its only a matter of time before i do too! but i wont be made to feel belittled or underrated by an 18 year old who doesnt know anything about me or indeed any of you lovely ladies on here! so girls if you slip up and i mean slip up not cheat or fail as has been insinuated here get back on the wagon and remember tomorrow is another day!

 

[shellreed2011]

well said summerrain you are one of the ones who talked me away from the fridge last week lol but had i gone through the fridge(and indeed emptied it!) i know full well i would have had no judgement of you ladies but would have had help and support to get past it and move on!

 

[DappyMare]

What do you call a cheat??? Everyone is on a weightloss journey, some take the direct route, other people choose to take a more scenic route.

I hate the term cheating! I see it as more of a blip . Is it really cheating that someone chooses to have a day off plan for a special occasion? Or that someone comes off plan for medical reasons. Is it really cheating you feel so low you treat yourself to something off plan... No its not cheating, its just a little detour off the path on a weightloss journey.


Well done for being 100% on YOUR weightloss journey, But don't Judge people for little or Big Blips on THERE weightloss Journey.

 

[Beaut x.]

By cheating, I mean anything that would kick you out of ketosis...like cakes and chocolate. Not things that will keep you on track!!!!!!!!!! Anything that keeps you on track is clearly the right way to go!!!!!!!!

 

[SummerRain]

To be honest, even if I stuffed my face with 30 mars bars yet managed to draw a line under it and get back to my packs the next day, that's not cheating... That's slowing myself up from reaching my goal.

If I did NOT bother to TRY to draw a line under it and get back to my packs, I would then be cheating myself.

You are young, I hope you nail this, I truly do because a lifetime of dieting is no fun. So make sure you are in the 3% that nails this, I genuinely mean that because I know what it will be like if you don't. I've lived it. Its horrible. Lots of luck in reaching your goals. X

 

[Beaut x.]

I do understand what you mean. And to put it straight again, I did not mean to cause offense to anybody. Thank you I'm hoping it works eswell...seeing people I know suffer because of their weight is no fun, so taking their advice and doing it for myself. Good luck on your loss eswell with however much you have to loose xx

 

[shellreed2011]

clearly you dont have children! if you did you would know that when they make cakes in school or it is their birthday they EXPECT you to try their cooking and even say its lovely even if its like a chocolate rock! and if people do eat chocolate it is their business not anyone elses and if someone on here does eat it i will be there to support them when they get back on the wagon not to judge them because this is what this forum is about supporting each we all have a problem with food or we wouldnt be here! bringing people down and judging them because they have gone a different way to what you think they should is just downright rude! you havnt seen enough of life to be able to judge anyone or know anyone enough to make hurtful comments.

 

[Chunky Madwife]

Oh dear. So misguided. Yes, this diet can be the easiest diet in the world. Sometimes. It can also be very difficult, at work; socially; with family. Sometimes it can feel very isolating and you just want to get stuck into food just like everyone else. So, I have to disagree with you about that.

I took a few days off last week and made some stupid choices; this was a conscious decision, and I don't feel I cheated. I enjoyed my days off, and didn't put any weight on. I didn't use my Exante products during my days off (this would have been pointless and a waste of money). So I disagree with you there also.

The whole concept of "cheating" is classic diet psychology. "Ooops I cheated, therefore I have failed. Therefore I will keep failing. So I'll just give up." The black or white approach is so damaging!!!!

If you "decide" to veer off any diet, it's not the end of the world. The really difficult part is to be able to accept these lapses and move on positively, get back into the right frame of mind.

And this is next to impossible if you view this as cheating, because you will start to feel:

a. shame and anger for giving into temptation
b. hopelessness
c. self loathing for being "bad".

So I disagree there. I think that when people "cheat", as long as they are making that decision consciously, and are able to choose to return to their diet, then this is a much healthier way to view things.

I am rambling. You come across as immature, patronising and smug, but I am sure that you aren't really. just a bit short-sighted.

I wish you luck though and hope that you might be able to maintain your success.

 

[Getslimquick]

Thanks to this thread - irritating though it is, but I did enjoy my breakfast extra today!
Its good to do what I want and to reached the stage in my life where what anyone else thinks does not matter. I do whats best for me, and no one else can possibly know what that is.
Good luck fellow fighters of this ghastly disease - obesity. Thats what it is, its not a failure or greed or being weak willed. We do not yet understand the epidemic which is inflicting western society, we know its consequences. What drives us to over eat is complex BUT we are not inferior beings. We are different. There are not many women around who do not have to constantly fight this, just look around? Some are better warriors than others - so what, some are better Olympic runners than others too.
I do not know a single soul who actually wants to be fat. Its a disease which we battle. Anyone doing a VLCD is a success - so well done.
Good luck and enjoy doing what is right for you!! I am.

GSQ

 

[babystar31]

Just to note beaut...if u do see it as cheating its harder to do the diet properly. If i gave in and looked for an alternative everytime i "cheated" id be yoyoing my way thru life (ok, i am lol)....u need to know how to brush yourself down and start again. Yep TS is how it should be done, or WS....but sometimes life doesnt allow for it xx

Have to also say, that altho the post sounded very condescending and very naive, some of the retaliations stooped a bit low. Cmon guys lets keep the peace xx

 

[SummerRain]

I think I got myself 'het up' because I feel like I have to constantly explain myself out there-------> ( real world) When in a group of people, I will make a "joke" about my weight..etc to get it out there that yes, I know I am fat but look..I am all "jolly" and "comfy" with it...None of us want to feel like we have to do it here, if you know what I mean. You are right though babystar (you are such a sweetheart) Beautx is only young and to be fair I thought I knew way more then she does when I was 18 and I acted like it to (my poor mum!)...hahaha its only now I kinda wonder if I did know as much as I thought I did lol!! xx Live and let live kinda thing...( I think that's the saying!)

 

[Jubbly]

"By cheating, I mean anything that would kick you out of ketosis...like cakes and chocolate. Not things that will keep you on track!!!!!!!!!! Anything that keeps you on track is clearly the right way to go!!!!!!!! "

I have to say in Beaut X's defence that there IS a difference between types of "cheating". There is the "I'm meant to be on SS/TS whatever but I'm hungry and been invited to dinner so I'm going to have a salad with no carbs and a sparkling water" type of "cheating" and the "I'm depressed or stressed and fed up so I'm going to eat a whole bag of kettle chips" type of "cheating". Clearly the first is preferable to the second and is more controlled. Having said that, I understand everyone's point of view, having been at all the stages of total dedication (and consequent smugness), "good cheating" and the old "I'm going to completely blow it". The journey is unfortunately not always a simple one and you find yourself returning to dieting, which you may not even do, but if you do, your resolve and motivation and feelings will be entirely different the next time. But well done for sticking to it and you're all wonderful

 

[Starlight]

I just dont see either as cheating at all. To me cheating is something you do in a sort of underhand way to gain something.

if you have something thats going to keep you in ketosis then its just making a sensible choice and having a few extra calories. If you have a blow out then youre off plan, pure and simple.

Personally i dont see either scenario as cheating at all.

 

[jojo-p]

Phew, everyone is getting a bit hot under the collar on this one!

I have done Atkins and lapsed then gained it back, LL and lapsed and put the whole lot back on and more and here I am trying to loose it all again... I am not new to the process! (wish I was!)

My current position is one that I found it quite tricky to own up to:ashamed0005:... like Chunky Madwife I believe it all comes down to choices and owning those choices. Whatever you do in life it is your own choice to do it - I have health issues and if the doctors tell me to do something I have to realise that I have the choice to do it or not. If someone invites me to a BBQ (YUM) I have to make the choice whether to eat or not and then the choice to drink and then what to eat (no carbs and small portion or just give in to the temptation of a big white bap!!). The difficult thing about this is that it is ulitmately my own choice and I have to realise that once I find myself surrounded by the detritus of a massive fall from the wagon I have to own up to it - yes I did it, yes it was my own choice, yes I CHOOSE to get back on the wagon and get on with life. (otherwise I wouldnt be here)

So after all that, remove the other CH word and go for the CHOOSE word which leaves Beaut's question obsolete - nobody is CH***ing but everyone is making their own CHoices and that is why it is such a personal matter.

This is my opinion and my many journeys have brought me to this philosophy and I am just here joining all you lovely people and giving my two pennies whilst hoping I can choose to do the right thing next time I am trying to maintain for the gazillionth time!:sigh:

ps However meant, Beautx has appologised 3 times for any offence

 

[coralprincess]

OK OP, please let me explain in a way that you can understand some of the reasons why people 'cheat'

It sounds to me that you have a weight problem possibly due to having a slower metabolism to your friends. You've been eating the wrong things & unfortunately have put on weight as a result. You obviously get no comfort out of eating & it was purely wrong choices made, going from what I've read in your comments, that is.

For a lot of people, myself included, eating is like a comfort blanket. It gives you a rush of endorphins, pleasure, sugar when you feel like you need a boost. It makes you feel happy whilst you're eating whatever it is. You feel bored, you eat, you feel lonely, you eat, you feel upset/angry, you eat. You get the picture.

It just gives a minor distraction from whatever it is you are feeling at that moment, that you don't want to feel. It's basically an addiction, a compulsion. A learned response that's hard to break. Some people may have been eating to medicate for years. Some people may have been abused as a child & turned to eating. They might have an abusive partner & eating makes them feel good. They might have a stressful job. There are a million reasons to turn to eating. The same way as people turn to drugs, alcohol or gambling. They might also be perfectly happy, but just have a problem overeating!

The reason why people 'cheat' is because it's hard to deprive yourself. It's hard to not give in to the compulsion, it's hard to miss out when everyone else is indulging. Sometimes, you might have had a really crappy day and reach for the chocolate because for that second you're eating it, you feel good. If you've been doing this for years, it's a hard habit to break. Just like any other addiction.

Basically it's something in your brain that is bloody hard to turn off!

I know you're young, and it seems very easy for you and you're lucky you feel that way. I just wanted you to see it from another point of view and see why some people are upset and hope you can understand the reasons.

I wish everybody good luck in their weight losses. Keep going guys! We can do it xx

 

[largelesley]

I'm not trying to stir anything, if you know me then you'll know this is true. This forum has helped me, I know I could have worded what I put at the beginning differently, but can't change that now.

Yes you could have you cant change it your right
But tou could easily have added a bit in to make it sound not so harsh and condecending your right i dont know you but you dont know me either or these other ladies
You and me dont know the paths of life which has led us to eing overweight and have problems with food it happens for all diff reasons
You do seem to have a very blinkered view of things i am certainly not trying to get at you i wish you well but i do think you could grow up a bit and see some others points of view
I have an 18 yr old and i would hate it if i thot she couldnt empathise with others

 

[Beaut x.]

Look what an innocent post has turned into

 

[Divster]

An innocent smoothy, if you eat enough of them can still make you fat!

 

[largelesley]

Look what an innocent post has turned into

It certainly opened up a good debate

 

[Smallerme]

I think the simplest answer is ketosis doesn't keep hunger at bay for everyone. I did exante for 5 weeks and it was the toughest diet in some ways as I was very, very hungry, hence times where I ate.