2015 here I come!
- Thread starter Spanglymum
- Start date
Spanglymum
Gold Member
Ah I see, dietninja. That makes sense. But as I'm going to be mixing "fast" (ie pack) days with low carb days I think I'd better be careful. Packs are a useful tool but I don't think I'll do a whole day of them necessarily - or if I do I will space them out very carefully. I am very carb-sensitive. As clinq says, "why do we give up on what we know?"! Yes, amen to that!
Glad you're feeling better already, clinq. It's so worth it to feel "normal" and not possessed by carb cravings. Peace descends!
Glad you're feeling better already, clinq. It's so worth it to feel "normal" and not possessed by carb cravings. Peace descends!
Spanglymum
Gold Member
Hungry hungry hungry last night (after saying 'peace descends'). I stuck to low carb though. I deliberately had quite a fatty dinner (ooh doesn't that sound appealing?! Lol) and woke this morning slightly nauseous and not in the mood for food at all. Ooh. Ketosis?! I did have some sticks somewhere but I might go just by feel rather than stressing over them not turning pink (yes, I have previous).
Only problem with attacking my carb issue head-on is it unmasks the things I use sugar to hide from... I will change my avatar to something less recognisable and then share more.
Hope everyone has a lovely day!
P.S. Enjoying the programme about the dieters. I must do the questionnaire, though I can guess the outcome. I was pleased to see ketosis via low carb 5:2 on there!
Only problem with attacking my carb issue head-on is it unmasks the things I use sugar to hide from... I will change my avatar to something less recognisable and then share more.
Hope everyone has a lovely day!
P.S. Enjoying the programme about the dieters. I must do the questionnaire, though I can guess the outcome. I was pleased to see ketosis via low carb 5:2 on there!
Spanglymum
Gold Member
So funny - after saying I wasn't hungry, suddenly I WAS 
Is this how "normal" people's appetites work?! I'm not complaining. Anyway, I had planned ahead and had two boiled eggs and some spinach with me (and a jar of mayo in the company fridge).
It's interesting, though, how self-conscious I felt about eating my egg mayo salad for breakfast in the canteen just now. Like someone would look at me and go "no wonder she's so fat, eating all that fat". MADNESS! Like, who's business is it apart from mine what I put in my body? Have I learned nothing?!!
Anyway - loving feeling like I have some "oomph" back. I hope it just keeps getting better from here on in. Clothes aren't any noticeably looser as yet but I hope that will come. I'm tracking calories in mfp this time (after a spectacular fail a couple of years ago where I took Gary Taubes at face value when he said "calories don't matter"... well they do for me, it seems!)
Is this how "normal" people's appetites work?! I'm not complaining. Anyway, I had planned ahead and had two boiled eggs and some spinach with me (and a jar of mayo in the company fridge). It's interesting, though, how self-conscious I felt about eating my egg mayo salad for breakfast in the canteen just now. Like someone would look at me and go "no wonder she's so fat, eating all that fat". MADNESS! Like, who's business is it apart from mine what I put in my body? Have I learned nothing?!!
Anyway - loving feeling like I have some "oomph" back. I hope it just keeps getting better from here on in. Clothes aren't any noticeably looser as yet but I hope that will come. I'm tracking calories in mfp this time (after a spectacular fail a couple of years ago where I took Gary Taubes at face value when he said "calories don't matter"... well they do for me, it seems!
)
Clinquant
Gold Member
I loved the Gary Taubes but I think when we have an emotional component in our disordered eating then there has to be some sort of conscious restriction. I love many of Geneen Roth's insights too but I can't handle the intuitive eating.
I thought the tiredness in last nights Horizon was interesting. 1.5 times the calories when tired. I can relate to that.
I thought the tiredness in last nights Horizon was interesting. 1.5 times the calories when tired. I can relate to that.
Spanglymum
Gold Member
Yes, me too. I remember really noticing when I did LL how I habitually used food/drink to prolong the evening and postpone going to bed. It's amazing what we forget along the way, isn't it? I'm still learning though - last night and the night before I was tired at 9pm but still stayed up to watch the Horizon instead of going to bed It's still nice to be sleeping through though.
Doing good, I think. I had gammon, sprouts and kale last night (with lots of butter on the veg) and then this morning egg mayo with lettuce and a couple of bacon strips I cooked the other day. NOM! Still waiting for the burst of keto energy, but at the moment I'm just happy not to be completely KNACKERED all the time. Revelation!
Finding it weird to be trusting myself to eat the "right" amounts. It's very early days though. I've always had the security of packs or some prescribed "shoulds". This is fabulously liberating but also a bit scary.
Ooh and I have had an inspiration along the way. I really want to learn to ride my bike properly - ie learn to signal etc and be confident riding on the road. Turns out our council runs adult cycling lessons 1:1 for free - so I'm trying to get that in the diary. I think combining usefulness with fun with exercise has to be a winner! I have a little vision... used to be me at a certain size ... but this year it's me getting off the train in the morning with my reflective top on and a wee folding bike, to cycle the last bit to the office. I'd love to be one of those superfit people!
Laters!!
It's still nice to be sleeping through though.Doing good, I think. I had gammon, sprouts and kale last night (with lots of butter on the veg) and then this morning egg mayo with lettuce and a couple of bacon strips I cooked the other day. NOM! Still waiting for the burst of keto energy, but at the moment I'm just happy not to be completely KNACKERED all the time. Revelation!
Finding it weird to be trusting myself to eat the "right" amounts. It's very early days though. I've always had the security of packs or some prescribed "shoulds". This is fabulously liberating but also a bit scary.
Ooh and I have had an inspiration along the way. I really want to learn to ride my bike properly - ie learn to signal etc and be confident riding on the road. Turns out our council runs adult cycling lessons 1:1 for free - so I'm trying to get that in the diary. I think combining usefulness with fun with exercise has to be a winner! I have a little vision... used to be me at a certain size ... but this year it's me getting off the train in the morning with my reflective top on and a wee folding bike, to cycle the last bit to the office. I'd love to be one of those superfit people!
Laters!!
Spanglymum
Gold Member
Felt low last night, like this is just too big a mountain to climb (again). Tired this morning too, despite a good nights' sleep. I guess I'm hefting quite a bit of excess weight around, however much ketosis helps with stabilising energy levels, so it's going to be tiring just day-to-day. I think I used to get through with 'hits' of sugar or carbs or caffeine. I am still having coffee or tea in the morning by the way. If I stall at any point I might need to cut out caffeine. For now it's nice to not feel bloated all the time!
I think in my head this morning I had a moment of, 'what? I've been doing this a whole week and I'm not skinny? Waaaa!' And then slapped myself (metaphorically) about the head and got on with my day.
Boiled egg for breakfast. Might not be enough so I might have something else when I get to work.
In parallel with the weight thing (I did LL originally just after I turned 40) I've got a whole midlife crisis going on. It's not quite as dramatic as that sounds, more a readjustment of priorities and learning to accept things. I basically like my life (hurrah!!) but I don't want to accept that I'm never going to be a sculptor, painter or writer though. I need to get a move on and actually make/do some stuff then!!
I think in my head this morning I had a moment of, 'what? I've been doing this a whole week and I'm not skinny? Waaaa!' And then slapped myself (metaphorically) about the head and got on with my day.
Boiled egg for breakfast. Might not be enough so I might have something else when I get to work.
In parallel with the weight thing (I did LL originally just after I turned 40) I've got a whole midlife crisis going on. It's not quite as dramatic as that sounds, more a readjustment of priorities and learning to accept things. I basically like my life (hurrah!!) but I don't want to accept that I'm never going to be a sculptor, painter or writer though. I need to get a move on and actually make/do some stuff then!!
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Clinquant
Gold Member
I absolutely get that but you are doing so well. I have had such a full on week and the tiredness was crippling today. Fortunately busy which keeps me out of trouble but I'm in danger now.
Spanglymum
Gold Member
It's weird: I thought I cared about the weight/size (and I do) but I could see myself carrying on with this woe just because I feel so WELL on it! It's as if I've been suffering from a deficiency for years: saturated fat deficiency!! And I don't need to eat that much to feel satiated, which, again, is revelatory. Outside the security of packs I never thought I'd find that. Blimey.
Sailing without sugar and bread. I had a momentary 'ooh' as I made toast this morning for the family, but otherwise I've been totally fine. And everyone is wanting my food!! Lol. After years of diets, it's lovely to be the one with the plate of meat and greens that everyone else wants. I did us all pork chops this evening (haven't had them for years) and everyone enjoyed very much
I'll have to check out your diary, Clinq. I hoped you managed to negotiate the danger zone safely!
Sailing without sugar and bread. I had a momentary 'ooh' as I made toast this morning for the family, but otherwise I've been totally fine. And everyone is wanting my food!! Lol. After years of diets, it's lovely to be the one with the plate of meat and greens that everyone else wants. I did us all pork chops this evening (haven't had them for years) and everyone enjoyed very much
I'll have to check out your diary, Clinq. I hoped you managed to negotiate the danger zone safely!
Spanglymum
Gold Member
Funny that I'm feeling so good on low carb but also so tired!! Like I put my daughters to bed last night and fell asleep on my own bed at 8pm!!! I think it's my body repairing itself. That needs sleep I suppose.
I had the funniest dreams last night too - very literal: breaking out of a prison!?! (My subconscious apparently doesn't think I get metaphors unless they're really obvious!!)
I had the funniest dreams last night too - very literal: breaking out of a prison!?! (My subconscious apparently doesn't think I get metaphors unless they're really obvious!!)
Spanglymum
Gold Member
Tired last night but refused to go to bed. What's wrong with me? Stayed up til 10pm (am such a rebel). I guess the evening after the girls are in bed is my time ... And there isn't very much of it left if I go to bed at 8:30-9pm. But I'm up again at 5am so something's gotta give!
I do resent getting up this early, although it's useful for catching the early train. My husband insists his body clock wakes him at 5:30. I need time to wake up gradually, and would wake naturally at 6:30 (I know this from travelling for work - jet lag excepted!). The only way for me to wake at the same time as him is to have my Lumie clock come on gradually at 5am.
No idea why he would never compromise on this. I am done being angry about it - apart from the bedtime I guess, which is my (pointless) passive-aggressive rebellion. 13 - almost 14 years - of marriage. (Sorry to rant but sometimes it's hard being a carer as well as wife and mother and breadwinner!)
I decided last year to start putting me first a bit in 2015. Not about this time thing, but seeing my oldest and best friends, many of whom live in the North of England or Scotland. I have two trips booked already - nights in York - so will get two nights of sleep that are up to me!
Also going to New York in two weeks' time!! Yay!! It's a cliche but I love NY! Got some biiiiiig meetings while I'm over there - but also the Sunday to myself (flights are much cheaper on a Saturday). Must find a good exhibition to go to. So (despite the jet lag, which isn't too bad in that direction) I'll get to wake up when I choose!
I do resent getting up this early, although it's useful for catching the early train. My husband insists his body clock wakes him at 5:30. I need time to wake up gradually, and would wake naturally at 6:30 (I know this from travelling for work - jet lag excepted!). The only way for me to wake at the same time as him is to have my Lumie clock come on gradually at 5am.
No idea why he would never compromise on this. I am done being angry about it - apart from the bedtime I guess, which is my (pointless) passive-aggressive rebellion. 13 - almost 14 years - of marriage. (Sorry to rant but sometimes it's hard being a carer as well as wife and mother and breadwinner!)
I decided last year to start putting me first a bit in 2015. Not about this time thing, but seeing my oldest and best friends, many of whom live in the North of England or Scotland. I have two trips booked already - nights in York - so will get two nights of sleep that are up to me!
Also going to New York in two weeks' time!! Yay!! It's a cliche but I love NY! Got some biiiiiig meetings while I'm over there - but also the Sunday to myself (flights are much cheaper on a Saturday). Must find a good exhibition to go to. So (despite the jet lag, which isn't too bad in that direction) I'll get to wake up when I choose!
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Spanglymum
Gold Member
TOTM started last night - two weeks late, but I'll have that, given that I had six months with nothing last year, which prompted all kinds of "oh no is this perimenopause?" panics. Also no pain - which is very unusual for me.
Still feeling low. Not sure what that's about - other than maybe I am always low but hide it with caffeine and sugar? Just feel I want to do something more meaningful with my life... I need to pull myself together!
Still feeling low. Not sure what that's about - other than maybe I am always low but hide it with caffeine and sugar? Just feel I want to do something more meaningful with my life... I need to pull myself together!
Spanglymum
Gold Member
Keeping on keeping on (as they say). Early(ish) night last night: 9:20pm, and sticking to low carb. I haven't been tempted to deviate, actually - apart from the odd "ooh that would be nice" thought about random carb-y things - but easy enough to dismiss. This is lovely, but I'm impatient! I now wish I'd weighed at the beginning (although it would have been scary). I decided early on to just go with how my clothes are fitting (I find weighting can be "triggering" for me sometimes) - but I don't feel any different. It's two weeks today since I started this woe, and if I'm honest, I think my tummy bloat has gone down quite a bit, and my face looks less puffy. This is great - and actually feeling more balanced generally is lovely - but it's amazing how quickly you forget how rubbish you were feeling, and the toddler inside you starts demanding "everything!" "now!" - ie by rights I should wake up one morning slim. Why hasn't it happened yet, dammit?!
Scared I'm eating too many calories - but I'm tracking in mfp and it's not out of control. I'm more interested in finding out what my natural appetite gives me, calorie-wise. I don't want to be counting calories for the rest of my life. I'm adding things into mfp after I've eaten them. The main thing I'm being careful about is carbs.
Scared I'm eating too many calories - but I'm tracking in mfp and it's not out of control. I'm more interested in finding out what my natural appetite gives me, calorie-wise. I don't want to be counting calories for the rest of my life. I'm adding things into mfp after I've eaten them. The main thing I'm being careful about is carbs.
Clinquant
Gold Member
I think that is the way to go - logging wise. I definitely don't believe a calorie is a calorie. I keep kidding myself that I'll be happy just to weigh less each month but then I too get impatient and want the big vlcd losses.
Sometimes it's just worth wallowing in that calm that comes with the right woe and I think then it's only a matter of making small changes to start the weight loss following. Hope I'm right!!!
Sometimes it's just worth wallowing in that calm that comes with the right woe and I think then it's only a matter of making small changes to start the weight loss following. Hope I'm right!!!
Spanglymum
Gold Member
So THAT's why my breakfast tasted so darned good this morning: carbs in sausages! Doh! Rookie mistake . Two sausages with green peppers, onions, mushrooms and a mound of lettuce. Nom-tastic, but more than half my 20g carbs for the day. Have since discovered that the ASDA "gluten free" sausages are apparently very low carb, so I'll buy those next time. (It was a totally lovely breakfast though!)
This may sound weird (when has that ever stopped me?!) but I really do feel like my body is "healing" somehow. I am tired a lot of the time (have started re-taking the iron, given how anaemic I was last year and I don't want to go there again!) - but it's kind-of a good tired, not a washed-out tired. Even if my weight stabilises and I don't lose, it's worth doing this for the calm and freedom from the carb-fuelled mental madness!
One thing I hadn't banked on was keto dreams! Apparently these are a thing. Who knew? I Googled it this morning after a week of crazy, crazy, vivid dreams - nothing particularly scary or upsetting (thank goodness!) but really really surreal and vivid and memorable. Something must be going right with my sleep though - last night there were loud works going on in our street before bedtime and my hubby said it woke him again at 1am. I totally slept through! Yay!
I think as long as I can keep mixing it up and don't allow myself to get bored of the same food every day, I could totally keep this going til Easter and then see where I'm at...!
. Two sausages with green peppers, onions, mushrooms and a mound of lettuce. Nom-tastic, but more than half my 20g carbs for the day. Have since discovered that the ASDA "gluten free" sausages are apparently very low carb, so I'll buy those next time. (It was a totally lovely breakfast though!)This may sound weird (when has that ever stopped me?!) but I really do feel like my body is "healing" somehow. I am tired a lot of the time (have started re-taking the iron, given how anaemic I was last year and I don't want to go there again!) - but it's kind-of a good tired, not a washed-out tired. Even if my weight stabilises and I don't lose, it's worth doing this for the calm and freedom from the carb-fuelled mental madness!
One thing I hadn't banked on was keto dreams! Apparently these are a thing. Who knew? I Googled it this morning after a week of crazy, crazy, vivid dreams - nothing particularly scary or upsetting (thank goodness!) but really really surreal and vivid and memorable. Something must be going right with my sleep though - last night there were loud works going on in our street before bedtime and my hubby said it woke him again at 1am. I totally slept through! Yay!
I think as long as I can keep mixing it up and don't allow myself to get bored of the same food every day, I could totally keep this going til Easter and then see where I'm at...!
Spanglymum
Gold Member
Hubby has been hogging the duvet all night in his sleep so I'm freezing and knackered!
News just in though is I think this woe might be working!! Imagine if I've found a way, finally, with real food? The door of the prison opens...
Clinq, good luck with your dentistry/construction project! Blimey. That's a lot to contemplate!
News just in though is I think this woe might be working!! Imagine if I've found a way, finally, with real food? The door of the prison opens...
Clinq, good luck with your dentistry/construction project! Blimey. That's a lot to contemplate!
Spanglymum
Gold Member
Sorry for the lack of posting. Had a "meh" day on Friday - not sure what got into me but a complete lack of energy and oomph. Then over the weekend I just felt really down off and on. No idea what the problem is - I just feel really low somehow. I am sticking to my guns but my trousers aren't getting any looser and part of me just wants to give up. I'm not going to - I know that way madness (and increased girth!) lies - but oh I wish I didn't have to do this again...
Which is weird, because the food is actually yummy. No idea why my brain is telling me I'm deprived - because I'm not hungry, and when I think about it I'm not even craving carbs. Very strange.
Maybe it's just the long dark days of January?
I'm supposed to be flying to NYC on Saturday (yay!) but with the blizzard forecast overnight and loads of flights cancelled it's anyone's guess if I will actually get to go...
Which is weird, because the food is actually yummy. No idea why my brain is telling me I'm deprived - because I'm not hungry, and when I think about it I'm not even craving carbs. Very strange.
Maybe it's just the long dark days of January?
I'm supposed to be flying to NYC on Saturday (yay!) but with the blizzard forecast overnight and loads of flights cancelled it's anyone's guess if I will actually get to go...
Spanglymum
Gold Member
Looks like the reports of the storm in NY were a bit over the top and they missed the worst of it... phew! (famous last words)
Still low. Taken some iron. Maybe this is normal for the time of year? I need to crank up my daylight lamp - but I never seem to get time. SO MUCH TO DO. I am so so so tired - which makes it difficult to accomplish everything I need to do. Need to pull myself together!!
Still low. Taken some iron. Maybe this is normal for the time of year? I need to crank up my daylight lamp - but I never seem to get time. SO MUCH TO DO. I am so so so tired - which makes it difficult to accomplish everything I need to do. Need to pull myself together!!
