Abi's weightloss diary - post jaw surgery

[clarri]

Hi
Have you read on Karens diary? Summersky and someone else (sorry cant remember who) were saying that their clients had better results when they upped their plans, either ss+ with white and green meal (not sure what Im talking about, but Im sure you know), Summersky reckons much better consistent losses that way?
You, although its stressy, are supposed to be enjoying planning your wedding, not stressing and exhausted cause CD is not suiting you? Up the plan girl, give yourself a break. Do you want to look back at this time and only remember the misery, or the excitement of planning your big day. Sorry to be blunt, but Im of the ilk that life is too short, and when your body doesnt like something, it goes into shut down mode and rebels.
A big big hug to you lovely. How damned frustrating for you regardless.
xxx

 

[abz]

i don't think i'm ever going to look back at this time as a time of excitement of planning my wedding. it's just been a massive stress from start to finish with the odd day of WOOHOO in the middle followed immediately by 'oh hell, did i make the right decision'...

really starting to wish we'd run away to barbados...

 

[Jim]

Morning abz, you working today?

 

[abz]

i am jim, yes. much to my dismay. i want to be in bed.

still, coffee is here for the timebeing i suppose. sleeping would be nice. but i've found in the past that if i take something like nightol i end up sleeping but not feeling rested. so i'm trying to avoid that if at all possible. surely once you get tired enough you start to sleep?

abz xx

 

[Jim]

ah well, I'm one of those horrible people who can sleep on a wall abz. Colleen gets really peeved with me, I get into bed, kiss her good night and the next thing I know the alarm is going off.

 

[Gemstone]

Well at least you took time out to kiss her goodnight Jim - that's something I guess x

Abz - sorry you're feeling so poo - mybe there's something in what Clarri was saying. I don't think your body has ever been very happy with ss has it x

Kazzy - I'm glad you enjoyed Angels and Demons - I'm hoping to go and see it soon - if not I'll end up buying the DVD instead like I did with The Da Vinci Code x

 

[Jim]

Well at least you took time out to kiss her goodnight Jim - that's something I guess

after the usual slap for trying it on Gem

 

[abz]

well there is a big IT night out next friday that i was thinking i was going to have to miss... so if i move up a plan next week at least i can take part in some way. even if it's eating a salad... i don't see the point in eating a salad if it's just chicken and lettuce personally...

we'll see. i'll talk to my cdc about it on monday, see what she suggests. my life hasn't been influenced as much as it was the last time around as i have just avoided going out i suppose, ha. and my head is in the right place. it's just that my body doesn't want to go along with it!!

abz xx

 

[Jim]

IT night out, sounds good to me abz, how many of you are there?

 

[Gemstone]

after the usual slap for trying it on Gem

Who slapped who?

Abz - If your body doesn't wanna play, why are you putting yourself through all this. Do something your body will appreciate and reward you for x

 

[abz]

that's just it gem. cambridge is the only thing that i have lost weight on this time around. i think my body is sick of me playing silly ******* to be honest. ww and sw i just maintained, even when following to the letter... totally depressing. but if i can pop up to the 1000 plan this next week and stay on that for the next couple of weeks i think i'll feel much better. and that way i'll be well out of ketosis by the time all my friend's hen parties start, ha. and maybe i'll lose a couple of lbs in the process. and i'll feel far more able to exercise too. yesterday on the exercise bike was a bit of a nightmare. and i have it all to do again tonight before i chill out, ha. although to be fair, it could be the answer to losing weight on ss. that's why i'm doing it this week, to find out

abz xx

 

[Gemstone]

You are so focused - you deserve good losses - it just seems so unfair x

 

[abz]

tell me about it

ah well. i have a cup of tea and a bottle of water. what more could one want in life other than slimmer hips?

 

[abz]

well my brain is swinging from one extreme to the other. keep it up!! it will come off to well it isn't bloody working, is costing a fortune and making me miserable at times...

i might text my cdc and see if she can enlighten me in any way. it would be much easier to move up the plans over the weekend when i have time to go food shopping and can structure things rather than when i'm going back to work and will have limited resources and desperately want to go to the panini shack...

abz xx

 

[abz]

right. well i have texted my cdc. i am so tired, devoid of energy. any kind of exercise wipes me out and the scales aren't moving. i'm starting to feel unhealthy and that's never supposed to be the case. you are supposed to feel all vital and bouncing on cd...

so we'll see what she says. she may want me to wait until monday or she may say i can go onto 1000 now. hopefully it will kick my metabolism up the arse. i can only think that my body has gone into starvation mode or something.

also on 1000 i will feel more able to continue my exercise without wanting to pass out afterwards... i know i'm unfit but god!!

abz xx

 

[abz]

well that was quick. i'm moving up to 1000. she says it sounds totally sensible and will help encourage me to exercise rather than worrying about exercising, which is good.

am totally terrified now though. what if i gain??!? and i just know i'm going to end up having a blow out now i'm allowed carbs. oh god.

well, if i do, and i'll try not to, then it's a one off. people do that i'm sure. aaaargh. eating has never been so scary!!

still. am rather looking forward to being able to go for it on the bike now, rather than worrying about putting myself into starvation mode. and hopefully it will help me to tone up more too

abz xx

 

[Jim]

I wouldn't dare slap her Gem.

Abz, do you have a type of carb flu on CD? You do on Atkins and we call it induction flu, it happens when the body stops burning carbs and is starting to burn fat for energy.

 

[abz]

indeed you do jim. the week of death, ha. i'm about to kick myself out of that and i'm sure i'll feel like hell going back the other way too...

 

[Jim]

I went through that abz, not nice is it love

 

[abz]

it isn't jim. now that i know i'm going to be coming out of ketosis and eating the dreaded carb tonight i'm sure i'm going to faceplant into something round and cheesy...

but i'm trying to analyse why that should make me feel insanely guilty. obviously i don't want to eat lots of pizza, but i really need to get my head around the 'good food bad food' scenario and just see it as food.

accepting that if i eat something horrendous when the carb monster hits it won't end the world, it will, however, slow my weightloss...

can't see me getting my head there somehow. but either way. i don't want to have gained weight at weigh in on monday.