Alex's Diary

Jump away Toothfairy ;-)

I mix the shakes with about 50ml of water in a small bowl and then just put in freezer for a couple of hours. Then when I eat them I imagine they are Ben and Jerry's lol!!

I'm not keen on just drinking a shake and like to feel I'm having food rather than just a drink. Works for me anyway xx
 
Day 16

100% day again

Vanilla shake for breakfast (as early meeting)
Maple bar for lunch
Mac cheese and broccoli for dinner
Frozen chocolate shake for treat

Coke zero and olives for a snack later


Emotionally though I feel rubbish today - lonely and upset for some reason (my sons with his dad for 10 days now so that doesn't help - but it is his usual routine so...) I guess I'm starting to realise that just losing weight isn't enough to change my life and throwing myself into work and family isn't enough anymore.

BUT I'm 40 years old, twice divorced and I'm not even sure where to start to meet the right person at this stage in my life. I'm not sure I even trust my instinct to know what's true or not if I did meet someone new??

God I sound mixed up tonight - sorry ladies xx
 
Day 17

Porridge for breakfast

Lunch - off plan as was on a course which provided lunch and I appeared to just forget I was on a diet and ate three sandwiches before I remembered!!!!! So now will be out of ketosis big time :-(

Snack - had the bar I intended to have for lunch.

Dinner - going to have courgettes mushrooms and cottage pie plus lots of water.

I was going to just not eat for the test of the day after my lunch disaster. But that's how I would have reacted before trying to change my mindset, I would then have felt really deprived, miserable and hungry and this would have led to a binge. So decided to just get right back on plan and treat lunch as though I'd had a protein meal and have my other packs as normal.

I'm hoping that this will mean damage will be limited as calories wouldn't have been high at all... Just the carbs that ate worrying!


Alex
X
 
Day 17 cont...

Met a friend for a drink after work - was intending to have Coke Zero but didn't have any in so ended up having vodka and slim!!! Which led to 3 of them and then was STARVING so had chip!!!!

Crap crap crap crap crap!!!!

Start again, again, tomorrow I guess :)
 
Ok decided that tomorrow I need to pull myself together so I'm gong to find out my exercise DVDs and start to do one of those everyday for half a hour - starting in the morning.

I think I need to start to tone to see real results plus if I feel like eating something of plan I'm going to exercise instead :)

A
 
Day 18

Porridge for breakfast (love it and it really fills me up)

Then off to a friends in Luton to see the torch and go to the festival there - taking a bar with me for lunch and will just wait for dinner when I get home :)

I will be good today, I will be good today, I will be good today....

A
 
yoga84 said:
Jump away Toothfairy ;-)

I mix the shakes with about 50ml of water in a small bowl and then just put in freezer for a couple of hours. Then when I eat them I imagine they are Ben and Jerry's lol!!

I'm not keen on just drinking a shake and like to feel I'm having food rather than just a drink. Works for me anyway xx
Click to expand...

Yum sounds like a good plan :)

Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins
 
Day 18 cont...

Bar and Coke Zero for lunch despite being at a friends :)

Cottage pie with courgettes and leeks for dinner

Frozen banana shake for treat

Had a good day today and feeling loads more positive about it all.

Planning on exercise DVD in the morning too :)

Yay!!!

A
X
 
Bananas said:
Well done sounds like a great day :)

You're so lucky to enjoy the porridge, I think it's bleugh
Click to expand...

I don't think of it as "porridge" just warm filling sweet stuff lol!

A
 
Day 19

Porridge and cuppa for breakfast
Planning on:
mac n cheese and broccoli for lunch
Chilli and mushrooms for tea

Bar for a snack

Lots of water throughout the day and some Coke Zero and olives tonight if I feel the need :)

Plus... I have joined eHarmony today (Internet dating)!!!!! I'm starting to regain my self confidence and this is the next step to getting out there and living!! I'm soooo nervous - wish me luck ladies xxx
 
yoga84 said:
Day 19

Porridge and cuppa for breakfast
Planning on:
mac n cheese and broccoli for lunch
Chilli and mushrooms for tea

Bar for a snack

Lots of water throughout the day and some Coke Zero and olives tonight if I feel the need :)

Plus... I have joined eHarmony today (Internet dating)!!!!! I'm starting to regain my self confidence and this is the next step to getting out there and living!! I'm soooo nervous - wish me luck ladies xxx
Click to expand...

Well done! Been reading you diary and just popped by to say hello.
Good luck, enjoy the fun thats heading your way!

Sent from my iPad using MiniMins
 
Hi BB (Love the name btw!!)

Thanks for pooping in to say hello - Its nice to know other people are reading my diary too :)

I'm hoping for a summer of fun ;-)

A
Xx
 
Thanks Bananas

I'm just seeing what happens atm - no expectations or predictions just an open mind :) Hopefully at the very least I'll get a couple of nights out with good company.... That'll do me for now xx
 
Hi Alex,
Have just had a mooch through your diary and wanted to say you're doing great Hun!
Like you this is soooooo much more than a diet for me, I'm trying to tackle my demons once and for all. Weasey is super knowledgable on the head stuff, I'd definitely recommend dropping her a line.
With regard to E-harmony, its how I met my OH, we've been together for 2 1/2 years and are planning to get married (at some point), so can certainly recommend it!
Stay strong Hunny
Beth x
 
yoga84 said:
Day 19

Porridge and cuppa for breakfast
Planning on:
mac n cheese and broccoli for lunch
Chilli and mushrooms for tea

Bar for a snack

Lots of water throughout the day and some Coke Zero and olives tonight if I feel the need :)

Plus... I have joined eHarmony today (Internet dating)!!!!! I'm starting to regain my self confidence and this is the next step to getting out there and living!! I'm soooo nervous - wish me luck ladies xxx
Click to expand...

Fantastic about eharmony u go girl :)

Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins
 
Bethers said:
Hi Alex,
Have just had a mooch through your diary and wanted to say you're doing great Hun!
Like you this is soooooo much more than a diet for me, I'm trying to tackle my demons once and for all. Weasey is super knowledgable on the head stuff, I'd definitely recommend dropping her a line.
With regard to E-harmony, its how I met my OH, we've been together for 2 1/2 years and are planning to get married (at some point), so can certainly recommend it!
Stay strong Hunny
Beth x
Click to expand...

Oooh thanks Bethers :)

That's really given me hope that eHarmony might work - I looked at all the Internet dating sites and this one seemed the most professional and structured of then all. I like the fact that there is guided communication rather than jumping straight in!!

And yes I am trying to face all of my demons this time round (I've lost this 5 stone 3 times before so this is my last shot at it - so I need to do the head stuff as well as the body stuff this time) Tbh I'm finding it an emotional journey and not easy at all - but I deserve to be the best I can be and the only thing stopping me... Is ME!!

So thanks again everyone this forum is really helping me :)

Alex
Xx
 
Day 19 cont...

All gone well today - did have an extra chocolate shake about an hour ago (so 5 packs today) but so much better to do that than go off plan completely! I find weekends the hardest so this is lesser of two evils :)

Internet dating wise - I'm already chatting with a lovely (and hot!!!) man... So that's put an extra happy smile on my face ;-) yay!!!!!!

A much happier Sunday Alex
Xxx
 
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