~**Anne-Marie's Refeed Diary**~

[anne-mariep]

Ah thanks girlie's. He's really sexy so hopefully be a nice boost after my ex! haha! Im all ears on the not eating enough but Im worried bout eating too much now when will the madness stop????? haha!

Im being good today with food.

Day 12

Breakfast Maintenance Bar

Snack Banana

Well I’m officially stuck in my estate due to the floods the water is 4ft deep and its rising there are some poor people in my estate who have had to leave their homes already. The rescue staff told my Mam that if it rains so bad as it did last nite the whole estate will be under water. My friend is stuck in my house until further notice and lucky I’m off work tomorrow coz there would be no way I’d get to work since I can’t even get out of my estate. They are saying we will be stuck here for maybe 3 days. It’s like a twilight zone looking out and seeing a big river where there should be a road and a big field.

Lunch Wholegrain bagel with 2 slices of luncheon chicken, mixed lettuce, cucumber, and beetroot with tablespoon of balsamic dressing. Trying to drink packs of water to flush out the alcohol can’t believe I wasn’t falling down drunk. I didn’t feel drunk at all just happy.

snack apple

Dinner steamed cajun salmon with 5 baby potatoes, mixed veg of broccoli, green peas, carrots and 2 brussels sprouts.

Desert Frozen Muller yogurt with mixed berries.

can of 7up. got a pain in my stomach again dont know why its happening seems to be every 3 days or so. Hopefully just my digestive system sorting itself out.

* so i confess had some crrot sticks and a gherkin last nite don't know why other than i wanted to pick stupid woman but at least it wasn't a whole bag of carrots or a whole bar of chocolate haha!

 

[summergurl]

awww no it wouldnt be such a bad thing if you didnt have the day off tomorrow and couldnt go in would it! lol Hope the atrocious weather stops soon for you chicken xxx

 

[JanD]

Oh 'eck!! Hope all's okay!! xx

 

[anne-mariep]

Yeah guess we will see in the morning what the story is whether we can escape the estate haha! People behind us have lost power and everything just praying it wont rain or mite wake up to a flooded down stairs.

 

[summergurl]

How is it anne-marie? Are you ok? xx

 

[anne-mariep]

How is it anne-marie? Are you ok? xx

Yes we have been released from our estate haha! But the next few days are gonna be constant rain so im praying the same thing wont happen again. Its like the north pole here at the moment so everywhere is a death trap coz of the ice.

Day 13

Breakfast Maintainance Bar (think i mite try switching my left over tfr shakes for these on wednesday mite as well chance it)

Snack Red apple its amazing how different these are from green ive tasted red before but never was mad into them but they are really nice now not as amazing as granny smith apples thou haha! edit- forgot i had a sugar free jelly(100cals, :-( flip) this morning think it was lack of water coz i was hungry. or maybe just picking haha!

Lunch Wholegrain wrap with 2 slices of luncheon chicken with 2 gherkins, 3 cherry tomatoes and mixed crunchy lettuce. Banana

Dinner Don't really know yet maybe something with pasta and turkey mite just throw loads of odd things together tonite. edit- had turkey steak in tomatoes, courgette, peppers, 1 teaspoon tomato puree, garlic, oregano, basil and thyme with pasta, Basically bolognase with pasta instead of spaghetti and turkey steak instead of mince haha!

Desert Jelly and frozen yogurt over mandarin.

*teaspoon of jelly i made last nite.
*handful of carrot batons ( decided not to buy another bag coz im only eating them to eat them if that makes sense)
*slice of turkey (stupid woman)


Exercise

went to the gym, i had a spinning class booked but unfortunately i was the only one who turned up so it got cancelled.

I done *15 mins on bike
*15 mins on threadmill changed the gradient this time much better than last time i was on it.
*10 mins on this floating thing (really need to find out the proper names of machines) this was hard work seriously.
*10 mins on leg and harm walking machine (sorry)
*10 mins on swimming thing ( this is only for your arms you basically just do swimming motions with your arms)
* 50 arm weight thing kinda like rowing with just your arms hahaha im useless with the names of these machines
* 20 chest exercises pulling weights towards eachother
* 100 stomach crunches on total abdominal machine (woo hoo know the name of it)

Yes im pathetic i will be asking for the names of these machines.

So basically i done 1 hour plus all the weight and muscle stuff. Then walked for about 30 mins. not to bad.

I love the gym hope i can keep this motivation up to go.

 

[JanD]

Looking good anne-marie .... and all that exercise! You put me to shame! This is where I really fall down - I don't do ANYTHING! , you're doing brilliantly! xx

 

[anne-mariep]

you seem to be running around a far bit i dont do anything like that no one to run around after haha! So i need to do it. It's hopefully gonna be more like a hobby than a chore otherwise ill prob get bored and stop.

 

[summergurl]

Looking good anne-marie ..... You know you can actually get turkey mince? I only use this now as i find it much tastier! And well done on the exercise xx

 

[anne-mariep]

Looking good anne-marie ..... You know you can actually get turkey mince? I only use this now as i find it much tastier! And well done on the exercise xx

Yeah i have turkey mince i was planning on makin a sandwich out of the turkey steak for lunch but it didnt defrost quick enough so i couldnt bring it with me to the gym. Must try out the turkey mince its in my freezer.

Ok Ive just realised something HORRIBLE some of the sugar free jellies ive been eating have 100 cals in them heart attach when i seen it its the one's with the fruit in them. Well damn them confusing me.

And another thing ive been bloody taken over by an idiot you know the guy i met on Sat well he's kinda messing wit my head (well prob not but my brain is messing wit itself) and all i can think about is eating. I had a huge desert, sugar free jelly the 10cal one thank god frozen muller yogurt and a mandarin im stuffed an what did i just do ate a slice of turkey. I was making my lunch for tomorrow and i wanted to eat everything even thou im so full. I drank back a can of 7up free hoping my stomach wud be so full of fizz i wont want to eat anymore.

God im so messed up. A guy is making me want to eat well not knowing wats goin on is making me wanna eat he said to me today 'you dont want to know whats goin on i went out with the footie lads and loads of stuff happened. Im just not in the mood' all i said was your quiet today hahahahaha! oh my head is wrecked, I MUST GET A GRIP I MUST GET A GRIP!

sorry about the rant but maybe saying it on this will make me STOP SABOTAGING MYSELF. AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!

 

[JanD]

Bin him anne-marie before you get sucked in to something unsavoury. All sounds a bit 'iffy' and you don't need it. You don't need to get involved you need to take care of you. You got along without him before saturday - you don't need the hassle.

And if all you have when you're feeling like that is a slice of turkey and a can of 7up you're doing okay girl!! x

 

[summergurl]

I agree with Jan!

Sugar free jellies ... do you just buy jelly that you make up with water but eat it 'raw' so to speak? I love that but not sure if thats what yous are on about as i know you can get jelly crystals too ......

And like jan said - if all you had was a can up 7up free and a slice of turkey - well done!! Think of how far you have come ... before what would you of had? and now, just those to things?! THUMBS UP!!!! (Y) xxx

 

[anne-mariep]

Thanks girls i think im over it now. It was my friend in my head she is kinda negative and it must have gotten to me more than i thought but im just happy i went out after SO long and enjoyed it. Loved all the attention i got and it just proves i can get hot men haha! Doing much better and guess what as of tomorrow im offically off refeed and into maintainance. Hahahaha!

 

[anne-mariep]

My last Day of Refeed haha!

Day 14

Breakfast Made some maintainance choc mousse absolutely hated it had about 3 spoons and it got so thick. I made a choc tfr shake(142) instead and threw the mousse in the bin. not for me at all.

* 2 cup's of tea with 2 sweetners
* half a litre of water

No snacking today in the morning woo hoo i was really busy in work so this helped alot. Im only eating coz i think i shud so must nip that in the bud.

Lunch Half a bagel(95) with 3 slices of turkey (66cals), 2 gherkins, 5 slices of cucumber, 3 cherry tomatoes & crunchy salad (60cals). Muller low fat yogurt (98) sugar free jelly(10cals) 329 + had the rest of the bagel(95cals) and half a banana(170cals) Total: 594

* half a litre of water
* granny smith apple(90cals)

Dinner 150g of prawns (132cals) gorgeous never was a fan of prawns but they were delish must try them different ways, 30ml of Low fat thousand island dressing(30cals) crunchy salad (26cals) cucumber(7cals) tomato(6cals) total: 201cals

Now im thinking of having either oatcakes with some extra light laughing cow cheese now which shud bring up my cals and give me some carbs. and i really want to see what the cheese tastes like and this way its guilt free haha!

So had 3 oatcakes(127.8) high cals for the size of them 1 and a 1/2 with laughing cow cheese(20cals) and 10g of tesco garlic and herb low fat soft cheese(12.6) gorgeous is not the word they are both so different but dreamy haha! total:160.4

Desert 10cal sugar free jelly topped with rhurbarb natural yogurt (44cals) total: 54cals

total for today: Gonna have a can of 7up (4cals) make it 1245.4. amazing how calories go up so fast. was thinking bout having another fruit but im not hungry so this will do for today i think.


Exercise

* 1hour walk with the puppies (they are so strong think ill need to build more muscles to be able to control them haha)
* 20 mins on vibroplate 30-35 strength
* 20 sits ups on swiss ball, 40 sits ups on floor
* 40 stomach crunches
* 20 pushups on ball, 30 pushups on floor
* 50 leg scissors(each leg)




Tanya forgot to answer I have the ones that you make yourself but i also found them in little pots ready made handy for work. Ill be staying away from the ones with fruit in future 100cals is a bit steep i think, for the amount of fruit you get in them. I went looking for sugar free jelly crystals but all i could find were harley's sugar free jelly so i stick with that tastes the same as regular jelly (well as far as i can remember).

 

[JanD]

Well done on your refeed anne-marie, I hope your wi goes well tomorrow and then it'll be welcome to maintenance! xx

 

[summergurl]

woweeeeeeeeee!! Maintainence tomorrow!! Looking forward to it?

I too love soft cheese & crackers/oat cakes but i have to avoid them where possible else i litterally could eat the whole tub of cheese & crackers/oat cakes in one sitting!

You will find that certain things may trigger cravings etc but now you're onto maintainence the learning will really begin

Good luck with it all chuck, get on over the maint section get yer diary on the go xxxxxxx

Oh and thanks for the jelly info

 

[anne-mariep]

woweeeeeeeeee!! Maintainence tomorrow!! Looking forward to it?

I too love soft cheese & crackers/oat cakes but i have to avoid them where possible else i litterally could eat the whole tub of cheese & crackers/oat cakes in one sitting!

You will find that certain things may trigger cravings etc but now you're onto maintainence the learning will really begin

Good luck with it all chuck, get on over the maint section get yer diary on the go xxxxxxx

Oh and thanks for the jelly info

Yeah they are very easy to eat actually im gonna try philadelphia on a bagel for lunch tomorrow. half with laughing cow as well haha! Yes ill start my maintainance diary 2moro. its so crazy how fast it goes. hope my weigh in goes well dreading it coz of last week.

 

[JanD]

How'd it go? x

 

[anne-mariep]

How'd it go? x

Im having an extremely BAD day! So went got weighted up 6 grams yes i know its nothing but why the hell have i not lost like everyone else its SO annoying. Im not goin back to the pharmacy either. I feel so lost I had the fact the pharmacist wasn’t with me through TFR the last 2 weeks ive left feeling down and pretty much in tears you know what he said to me 'if you don't like the diet just stop' how in the f***ing world am i meant to stop now????

It has been pretty downhill since then to be honest i was already having a pretty shity day and that just sent me insane. I went into the shop on my way back to work and i actually was gonna buy crisps now i was picking the lowest fat and cal crisps but STILL.

I knew it was gonna be bad i ate a pear and a banana before 11. ah ill show you wat ive eaten (so far, coz i know it hasn’t stopped yet)

I was planning on starting my maintenance diary 2day but im leaving it til 2moro coz i want to start on a postitive note.

Firstly i need some advice, ive pretty much decided that im not goin back to that pharmacy but shud i try find another one??? or just go it alone and go in an get my maintenance bars wen i need them?????

How many calories should i be on at this stage, the pharmacist didnt seem to have a clue i know what i should be aiming for in the future but shud i stick to below 1300 for a few more weeks???? (Today im definitely gonna be over that)

I feel like ive been left stranded by lipotrim at the most pivotal point i know they weren't dat great during TFR but at least i had the option to go to them if i had a question. Im sorry for being so down but i just feel so lost. :cry::cry::cry:


I knew a bad day was coming i could feel it coming i feel like i shud just stick to eating the healthiest things i have in my house like veg in salsa or something. Im full up with 7up free now so i hope that will last for a while longer ill go to bed early as well but then i think maybe i shud just have wat i want and get it over with so this doesnt last for more than a day then ill work my ass off for the next few days but that feels wrong see im a complete wreck.


Ok here's what ive eaten so far



Day 15


Breakfast Summer fruits Drink (189cals)


SnacksBanana(125) Pear (68)


Lunch Bagel(190) 2 slices of turkey(44) crunchy salad(26) gherkin(2) 3 cherry tomatoes (6) extra low fat Philadelpia (38), extra low fat laughing cow triangle (20) Muller Yogurt (98) sugar free jelly (8.5) Bottle of 7up free (6)


Snack 1 bit of Dark chocolate with mint centre 6g yes i weighted it before eating it (28)


Dinner 1 wholegrain wrap (172) Quorn spicy beef (85) Salsa sauce (14) mushroom (3.9) peppers(3) 1 tomato(4) crunchy salad (26) 2 quorn spring rolls (80)



Desert Rachels low fat peach yogurt (52) Sugar free jelly(8)


Total 1294 (edit 1390)


ok then i had a carrot with some salsa dip prob less than 20 kcals can of 7up free(3)



* 2 teaspoons of my mam's cottage pie no potato(???)
* 6 grams of dark chocolate with ginger (31.56)
* half a slice of whole grain bread(49) threw the other bit to the dogs before i could eat it
* 10g of tesco light cheese(12.6)
total: 100cals

 

[Yasmine]

Hey annie, you know, 6 grams, that is very little and is very likely to be water. Just do another week of what you're doing, stick to around 1200 calories and I am sure you're weight will drop or even STS.

You've done so well and it's not the end, this is where we need to sit back and start taking it upon ourselves to see how our bodies react to certain foods and stuff. Just carry on, you're doing great :hug99: