Anyone else feel intimidated by competition at group?

[frankied]

My SW is quite small only 8 to 10 of us stay. I'm very frequently slimmer of week. I can't help but feel intimidated by the idea of other people trying to 'beat' me for it, it makes me feel like I haven't done well enough when I am 'beaten'.

Does anyone else have feelings of intimidation by the competitive side of SW groups?

 

[ginlin]

I wish!
I go to group where about 30+ stay!

 

[Shirleen]

No, I'm genuinely pleased for everyone that loses.
Anyway our slimmer of the week etc normally loses 4+ lbs I can't compete with that

 

[frankied]

No, I'm genuinely pleased for everyone that loses.
Anyway our slimmer of the week etc normally loses 4+ lbs I can't compete with that

I am really happy for other people's losses. I guess when other people loose more than me it makes me think about whether I could have tried harder.

I think with a small group I have got too comfortable being the biggest looser each week,

 

[AnnaFaraday]

My SW is quite small only 8 to 10 of us stay. I'm very frequently slimmer of week. I can't help but feel intimidated by the idea of other people trying to 'beat' me for it, it makes me feel like I haven't done well enough when I am 'beaten'.

Does anyone else have feelings of intimidation by the competitive side of SW groups?

Yes - that is possibly how the other people in your group feel about you!!

Seriously, if you try to put yourself in their shoes for a while, maybe you won't worry so much about yourself.

 

[NiaX]

My group is quite large so I don't have that problem. I would try not to worry about it and concentrate on how you can use your great weightloss to help other members in group. That way, you might alleviate the pressure on yourself.

 

[Laurie]

I'm very competitive, hence I do SW at home now, and the only person I can compete with is myself!

 

[helzzz]

I'm very competitive, hence I do SW at home now, and the only person I can compete with is myself!

I am so with you! SOTW just made me feel like I'd failed each week (never got it in 10 weeks). Now I do it from home and only have to compete with me

 

[kerryathome]

nope, not at all, feel very happy for everyone elses losses, would love to have SOW at some point.

We have a large group too so not very competitive as its usually someone different each week.

 

[MadameLaMinx]

I had this a little bit when I first joined because I did regularly get SOTW. There was one guy who it drove mad, because he had been doing it for a while and had never won it.

I actually dont like the way SOTW works. It seems ridiculous to be encouraging people to lose huge amounts of weight when 1-2lb is the healthy amount to be losing weekly. I would far rather it go to someone who has struggled for a few weeks and pulled themselves back into the losses, or someone who has consistently lost steadily for a few weeks, than someone who has lost a big amount weekly. We all know that weight loss can vary from person to person, and it must be very discouraging for people who lose steadily to have other people rewarded for what can basically be attributed to luck.

 

[Aston]

Our group has about 20 that stay, though I've been lucky enough to win it 3 times in the 7 weeks I've been going, and everyone seemed happy for me. I do find myself listening to others' losses and trying to remember how they did the week before to see if I'll win it or not. It's more a bit of fun than anything I'd get competitive about, as long as I get a loss I'm happy People are really friendly and welcoming where I go though so I'm quite lucky in that way!!

My weight losses seem to have slowed now though so probably no danger of me running off with it ever again!! I think it's often newer members that win because you haven't plateaued yet- but I'm always still really happy for everyone else that gets it too

 

[frankied]

I actually dont like the way SOTW works. It seems ridiculous to be encouraging people to lose huge amounts of weight when 1-2lb is the healthy amount to be losing weekly. I would far rather it go to someone who has struggled for a few weeks and pulled themselves back into the losses, or someone who has consistently lost steadily for a few weeks, than someone who has lost a big amount weekly. We all know that weight loss can vary from person to person, and it must be very discouraging for people who lose steadily to have other people rewarded for what can basically be attributed to luck.

I totally agree you.
I know people in group who really want to win it and put lots of effort in for week (or two) in order to do so, but go back to weeks of up and down gains and losses after. When really it would much healthier and better for their weight loss to focus on small amount every week. And I think it would better if SW did more encouragement relating to healthy on-going losses.

My consultant doesn't help as in the past one week she offered prizes for anyone who can loose 3lb or more. The 2 people who managed it then had gain the next week. She also encourages people to set targets of bigger numbers for next week. I don't think it's healthy and it doesn't help. (to be honest I don't like my consultant, I really think she's a bit of idiot and can be rude sometimes but it's only group I'm able to go to)


I find it hard as people in group notice when I have a smaller but still very healthy loss. I feel pressure from knowing they will notice; to tell them every week I have lost at least 2lbs. When I have a 1lb or 1.5lbs loss at points I've even had some say well it least it's in the right direction as if it wasn't a good loss.

 

[Diamond Daisy]

I find it hard as people in group notice when I have a smaller but still very healthy loss. I feel pressure from knowing they will notice; to tell them every week I have lost at least 2lbs. When I have a 1lb or 1.5lbs loss at points I've even had some say well it least it's in the right direction as if it wasn't a good loss.

That's shocking!! I always set my mini target at 2lb and thats adventurous for me!

I agree it should be the "most improved" slimmer that week perhaps! Someone who has struggled to get their head round it or even not sure why they havent been losing very much (talking being 100% and losing 1/2lb or maintaining, I know a few people it's happened to).

 

[Clareel]

TBH there isn't a large emphasis on it in our group - yes the SOTW gets a nice basket of fruit but that's about it. My consultant is great at praising any type of achievement no matter whether it's a half stone award or a ten stone award, or even someone who has been on holiday and gained say 3lb when they were expecting alot more.

I've lost over 4 and a half stone and have had SOTW maybe 3 times so it's not an indicator of doing well really, some people get it and then never come back to class.

Just try and focus on your own weight loss (which is great by the way - well done) and try not to worry too much about what other people are up to.

 

[Circes]

it must be very discouraging for people who lose steadily to have other people rewarded for what can basically be attributed to luck.

While I agree with the general sentiment of your post I would just like to point out that luck had nothing at all to do with the numerous SOW and SOM awards that I got. I worked my butt off (literally) week in, week out, following the plan pretty much 100% every day for a whole year, and exercising 5 or 6 times a week. It was nothing to do with luck just sheer hard work and I earned every single one of those awards.

 

[NiaX]

My consultant makes a point of praising everyone - even if they had a gain. The way she (and I) see it is that the person who had a gain has been incredibly brave to come in and weigh as the chances are, they knew they'd have a gain that week. So I guess I am lucky enough not to have such a negative group.

 

[reginaphalange]

I love my group, we go on nights out and meet up outside sw so I am genuinely happy for them. I am sometime in awe of their losses though and wonder why mine aren't so big

 

[reginaphalange]

Our consultant praises everyone too and places focus on how much they've achieved rather on one bad week

 

[MadameLaMinx]

While I agree with the general sentiment of your post I would just like to point out that luck had nothing at all to do with the numerous SOW and SOM awards that I got. I worked my butt off (literally) week in, week out, following the plan pretty much 100% every day for a whole year, and exercising 5 or 6 times a week. It was nothing to do with luck just sheer hard work and I earned every single one of those awards.

I didnt mean to diminish the awards you achieved or lessen them, so if you feel that I did then I apologise. What I meant was that some of us were fortunate enough to be able to follow the plan and see bigger losses, whereas others who follow the plan in exactly the same way and do exactly the same thing are not always lucky enough to see the rewards of their efforts on the scales in larger numbers than 1-2lb a week.

And frankly I have lost count of the number of group meetings I have sat through where the SOTW is asked how she/he has done that week and they cant explain it because they had a bad week and their loss is more luck than effort.

We can all follow the plan perfectly and yet it may work better for some than others, thats all I meant. We have no choice over whether we are the ones that it works better for. Thats the luck I meant.

 

[dreamslim]

I used to go to a sw group with my (very competitive) friend. She was prescribed Xenical by the doctor so that in conjunction with sw meant she was losing 3-4lbs average a week and so, for the most part, got SOTW most weeks. Everyone in the group was always really pleased for her when she got it but I always felt cheated because I knew that it was, in part, down to the Xenical. She never told our C that she was on alli so it was never taken into account.
Then, the weeks she didn't lose, she would have a right moan in the car on the way home.
I go to a much larger group now 30-40 stay and SOTW usually changes most weeks so it's not too bad. I get a bit disheartened though because on my really good weeks I do average 3lbs but because of the size of the group I have't yet won SOTW.
Oh well, something else to aim for