melarnz
Silver Member
I thought I would start a new diary (again!!) to help me on my way. I climbed off the wagon and fell flat on my face last week.
Since I have filled my face with high fat, convenience foods and sweets. The result of this is the feeling that I can't cope. I have 2 girls under 5, I work 30 hours a week, I go to the gym 4 times a week, I run a house, I'm planning a wedding and am studying to do an English degree.
Since coming off healthy eating and coming off packs I feel tired all the time. I really don't cope well when I'm tired, so im snappy, depressed, I feel drained all the time and feel like there is a cloud hanging over my head I can't shake. I can't sleep and this makes me feel worse!!
The reason I am writing this is proof, you are what you eat!! Is my birthday this weekend. I was quite happy to let it go by un-noticed and do my packs and maybe have a lie in. However, my family and friends kept on and on about what I was doing so I td them we would go for a meal just to shut them up!! Since then, because I had planned a 'cheat' I've been awful.
It just goes to proove, you are what you eat! SO in order to help my future goal, I thought I would start my diary before I start back on the packs. By putting my most intimate thoughts down on how I am feeling, I can then read them back as an incentive to stay on plan.
My dad gave me loads of exante packs to use so it would work out much cheaper for me. But I really want to go back to the group. When I 'mentioned' it in passing, my hubbies face told me everything I needed to know. He is so fed up with ne changing diets and plans and eating and not eating, that he doesn't think I can do it. He said he doesn't care what I do, just chose one (or not) but stick to it. I can see his point, but it made me feel like acomplete failure (to be honest, I am).
How can I justify spending £70 per week on packs when I have 3 months worth under my kitchen table!! We are supposed to. E saving up for our wedding, and that is pretty much 1 grand in3 months!!
I think I need to just get this weekend out of the way, then start my packs again. Set myself some new realistic mini targets and e sure I have some non food treats along the way.
I am looking forward to this weekend, I just wish, I wasn't so ashamed of myself and how big I have got. I'm sure 2 stone is a massive difference and everyone will notice and think i have failed.
Ho hum....life plods on, and it's time to start the days rut all over again.
Since I have filled my face with high fat, convenience foods and sweets. The result of this is the feeling that I can't cope. I have 2 girls under 5, I work 30 hours a week, I go to the gym 4 times a week, I run a house, I'm planning a wedding and am studying to do an English degree.
Since coming off healthy eating and coming off packs I feel tired all the time. I really don't cope well when I'm tired, so im snappy, depressed, I feel drained all the time and feel like there is a cloud hanging over my head I can't shake. I can't sleep and this makes me feel worse!!
The reason I am writing this is proof, you are what you eat!! Is my birthday this weekend. I was quite happy to let it go by un-noticed and do my packs and maybe have a lie in. However, my family and friends kept on and on about what I was doing so I td them we would go for a meal just to shut them up!! Since then, because I had planned a 'cheat' I've been awful.
It just goes to proove, you are what you eat! SO in order to help my future goal, I thought I would start my diary before I start back on the packs. By putting my most intimate thoughts down on how I am feeling, I can then read them back as an incentive to stay on plan.
My dad gave me loads of exante packs to use so it would work out much cheaper for me. But I really want to go back to the group. When I 'mentioned' it in passing, my hubbies face told me everything I needed to know. He is so fed up with ne changing diets and plans and eating and not eating, that he doesn't think I can do it. He said he doesn't care what I do, just chose one (or not) but stick to it. I can see his point, but it made me feel like acomplete failure (to be honest, I am).
How can I justify spending £70 per week on packs when I have 3 months worth under my kitchen table!! We are supposed to. E saving up for our wedding, and that is pretty much 1 grand in3 months!!
I think I need to just get this weekend out of the way, then start my packs again. Set myself some new realistic mini targets and e sure I have some non food treats along the way.
I am looking forward to this weekend, I just wish, I wasn't so ashamed of myself and how big I have got. I'm sure 2 stone is a massive difference and everyone will notice and think i have failed.
Ho hum....life plods on, and it's time to start the days rut all over again.