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BL's Excellent Adventure: Abstinance has left the building. :D

#1
Morning peeps!

I have some news....

I am going to finish my journey now, and go for it to further my loss, and get to my original goal, so guess what! I am re-joining you all in abstinance!! :family2:

When I started my journey, I set a goal of 10 stone. Then, I readjusted my goal as an important famiy holiday approached so I could be well into RTM before that happened....so I stopped abstaining a stone away from goal.

I was quite happy at that weight, so I went into RTM always keeping the option of returning to get to that final number if I ever wanted to.

My original intention was to get half a stone under where I wanted to permanently settle. Have that buffer zone to maintain in, and that is what I am now going to restablish since I chose not to for holiday reasons. Now I choose to. :)

There is a personal reason I want to get to that number as well- I weighed ten stone when my ex-husband told me he would be nice to me when I wasn;t so fat. At ten stone!! :eek: Bar steward. :D

So, I want to get back to that fat (hah!) size again, even if its just for a day - to put my footprint on it - for my own personal satisfaction, to be where I was, when I was broken.

I have also put on about half a stone in the last 2 months - slowy - an ounce at a time. Not enough to look bad, but I can feel the uncomfortableness of it already.

Losing my cat, Vincent, was just too much for me - and I found that was the biggest trigger I encountered yet, and I put those pounds on, which by no means is the end of the world, or a broken plan! But it seemed now would be the opportune time to revisit LL and achieve my original goal.

So, I gave a lot of thought - do I just lose those 7 pounds - or do I go back and happily finish what I originally set out to do....and I have chosen the latter.

I feel excited, another goal to chase, and its exhilherating. ANd I feel proud of myself, in taking action. Any other attempt - at that first sign of feeling uncomfortable I would have said "oh well" and blown it all - and I have in no way done that.

I have decided there is a tool I can use, so I choose to use it.

SO here we go! Gonna rock this right down to the end. ANd I can;t wait to get started.

I am going to start tomorrow or Monday. It depends on when I run out of my fresh fruit and veg as my hubby won't eat it, and I just can;t throw it away! :giggle: I have my packs all laid out, ready to go.....and I am not at all nervous, sad, worried or anything. I am excited!

So - watch this space!

The final run for another pot of gold.

This is going to be FUN!!!!! :bliss:

Wish me luck!

xx
 
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Morticia

Happy in my own skin
#2
Oh congratulations on taking this final step, and well done for being so positive about it. I would wish you luck but I don't think you need it, I think you will sail through this.

Ps, is the board slow to load this morning or is it just me?...:D
 

Jezebella

Playing the Angel
#3
Wow BL, congrats, this is so exciting for you :) It is great to see how much you have changed as a person since you first started LL and how mentally strong you are now and what positive choices you make for your life, you really are in control of your own destiny!! So happy for you:)

Jez
xx
 
#4
THanks ladies! :) I am really buzzing this morning - getting all prepared. Cleaned out the fridge, put away all the cooking stuff I won;t be needing (yay! :D) and just really excited. Have started maiking buckets of ice in preperation for my smoothies and mint-choc 'ice cream' - got the tea ready and chilling....and just really happy about my decision. :)

I struggled over the past few weeks at first deciding what to do. You may have noticed I've been a bit quieter then usual. The old mind was tickin away. At first I felt it is almost a cheat to do this. I mean, technically, I am only 7 pounds over the top end of my 7 pound buffer that I allowed myself.....with a little hard work, I could lose that. But - then I would be back where I was, without the real 7 pound buffer I would have had if I went all the way to my original goal.

With the help of my lovely SB, talking it through, I realise LL is a tool - and if there is a tool out ther that helps you, use it. We compared the analagy, if you get an awful hair cut/ccolour - you don;t wait until it all grows out again - you do what you can to fix it now.

I also wondered - was this "failure", and that upset me. But the more I thought about it - I realised - failure would be to do NOTHING about it. And that just was not an option. It is just not acceptable for me to get sloppy with my weight. And I have recognised an important trigger. Grief/Sadness. So, by learning something valuable as it will always be a part of life, at one time or another, and by taking control of myself, I am really being successful. I feel that way, and was encouraged after discussing it with my LLC, she said the same thing.

So, I came to peace with my decision. It's the right one for me, and I don't see at as a "second time." I feel quite happy to have mainained this well for 9 months before having a blip....so I see it as a continuation of my journey.

It's a good learning experience too - I am finding, a "diet" (I hate the use of that word) is so much easier to begin, when you are doing it becuase you WANT to - not becuase you NEED to. There is no pressure. I don't HAVE to do it, but wanting to do it makes it an enjoyable experience! (remind me I said this in a few weeks if you need too!! hehehe :D)

SO yay!!!! Its great to have another challenge to sink into!!!

Thank you!!! :)
 

Jezebella

Playing the Angel
#6
I think you are so correct in what you say BL. LL is a tool for us. it is the only weight loss tool I have ever used that is successful and because I am a very goal orientated person, I do love the challenge of it all, another day abstinent, another step closer etc. It will be quite hard for me when I do hit my goal weight, because I think I will feel quite lost afterwards. Although I am wise enough from reading all the posts on here, that when you do RTM and beyon that that is when the real work begins. I made a decision before I even started LL, that if the weight ever crept up again, that I would use abstinence as a way of not letting things get out of control for me. Stress is my trigger and it is all too easy to feel sorry for yourself and comfort eat. Hopefully I will be able to use it as a tool when I need it in the future and have the wonderful mental attitude that you have that it is not a blip or a failure that it is just another step on a journey that must continue for the rest of my life. I do not want to ever let my weight get so out of hand again. Thank you always for being so positive and inspirational, reading your posts on here before I started LL really helped me to commit to the program and realise I could be 100% abstinent if I wanted it badly enough :)

Jez
xx
 

katalena

Enjoying life!
#8
Good luck BL and welcome back to the wonderful world of abstinence :)

Kat xx
 
#9
good luck BL
do keep us posted of what its like - i'm a bit envious, i miss the simplicity of packs.
how long will you be on it - can you choose a certain number of weeks - do you have to the full RTM when you reach goal?
daisy x
 
#11
I would only be to happy to wish you all the luck in the world you are an amazing women and clearly have helped alot of people on here including me so a big thank you to you and an even bigger good luck hug.

x x x sam x x x
 
#12
Thanks everyone! Day one today. GLad to be getting started again.

Just realised, I could have had a 'lay in' lol - not brekkie or lunch to prepare!! Will remember that tonight when I set my alarm. I am up early, with nothing to do but sip coffee and get started on my water!! :D

Thanks for all your wishes above.

Daisy - I expect I wll be abstaining 4-6 weeks. You are not meant to do it less then a month as that can kind of screw things up I was told.

I asled my LLC if I had to do a full 12 week RTM again, as that was a concern - I didn;t really want to have to go that long, when only abstaining for a matter of weeks. SHe said no, I would not have to do that, that she would "fast track" me. I expect it will be a bit more like RTM for LLL. :)

Its nice to think I won;t be cooking or doing much washing up for the coming weeks - like a mini holiday!!! :D :giggle:
 
#13
Hey BL - Both you and I on the road to our goals! Seems rather poetic!

Best of Luck!
Too right Mikey!!! Here we are again!!! Though it feels different this time-not as scary, just as exciting, and looking at 4-6 weeks nowhere near as daunting as 35!~ :D

How you getting on? :)
x
 

RecoveringChocaholic

I'm going to be slim
#15
Good to see you taking control I wish I had your drive & determination thumbs up from me
 
#16
heres to your new goal then BL, Im excited to find out how it goes forr ya hun. Are any of the other flavours new since you did LL then? xxx
 
#17
Thanks RC. Nice to see you!! :)

Vix - the Porride and the Tomato Soup are the only new flavours.

I had the Porridge for Brekkie - it was OK. Not what I would call porridge, but it filled a hole nicely.

Just had some mushrrom soup - I forgot how nice it was. Tasted good. Working on my water now!!

And typical - its one of our new startes birthdays today and she came in with 4 boxes of really nice posh cakes!!! LOL

Oh well - another time! :D
 
#18
exactly, - ther will be lots more times! I started off liking the porridge, but now I have 3 choc shakes and a bar everyday! and Im happy with that! xxx
 


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